Review: Jew, Ari Shaffir

Episode 30 • April 22, 2026 • 01:13:51
Review: Jew, Ari Shaffir
Isn't That Special
Review: Jew, Ari Shaffir

Apr 22 2026 | 01:13:51

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Show Notes

Finally, FINALLY we get to the topics of Toblerones, custom clock making and MC Hammer . The comedy special at hand on this week's show is Ari Shaffir's 2022 offering Jew. Find it on Youtube: Jew You should watch it before listening to the review. 

Theme music: El Cha Cha Man by Juanitos. Juanitos, led by Juan Naveira, is the single French rock'n'roll and soul band mixing latin soul, exotica, acid jazz, punk, vocal pop and sometimes reggae roots in the Jackie Mittoo style. They are very good.

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Episode Transcript

[00:00:08] Speaker A: I made him a clock. I forgot about it. I made him a clock that said time for change. And then I put progressive politicians faces like all. Because the guy said. I said, I don't know they like that. Well, I said to the guy, Joel, who I made it for, I said, I don't really. I only know Bernie and aoc. I don't know anyone. [00:00:26] Speaker B: How about Ilhan Omar? [00:00:28] Speaker A: Oh yeah, ill hands on there. Corey someone. But Chuck Schumer, I don't think Chuck Schumer. [00:00:34] Speaker B: He should be Gavin Newsom, Kamala Harris. [00:00:40] Speaker A: Neither of which are progressive. They are progressive. [00:00:43] Speaker B: Maybe not progressive enough. [00:00:45] Speaker C: Yeah, I've got an MC Hammer one hanging on my wall at home. He was progressive with music. [00:00:50] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:00:51] Speaker C: And dancing and pants. [00:00:54] Speaker A: Did you ever see the. The little movie he made? [00:00:58] Speaker C: No. [00:00:58] Speaker A: Showcasing it is abysmal. [00:01:01] Speaker B: He made a movie. [00:01:02] Speaker C: What is it? [00:01:04] Speaker A: He genuinely thinks he's Jesus in it. Like he saves. He saves the kids in. In the Ghetto. [00:01:10] Speaker C: Like that. Remember that Michael Jackson movie where he became like a God in the movie, saving a bunch of kids. [00:01:17] Speaker B: Thriller. [00:01:18] Speaker C: No. [00:01:19] Speaker A: I remember when he was on the [00:01:21] Speaker B: Brit man in the Mirror. [00:01:21] Speaker A: Do you remember when he was on the Brit Awards and Jarvis Cocker got so incensed by the performance. [00:01:27] Speaker C: No. [00:01:28] Speaker A: So Michael Jackson was performing at the Brit Awards and he did. I can't remember whatever his big song was, but there's all this hunt, like dozens of people on stage dancing. And then he kind of throws off his cloak like he's the savior or something. And Jarvis Cocker from Pulp who was know obviously there's tons of rock stars. [00:01:48] Speaker B: Sure. Yeah. [00:01:48] Speaker A: It sat in the audience. He's utterly incensed. Like who the does this guy think he is? And he climbed on the stage, but then he said in an interview afterwards he didn't know what to do when he got there. He just climbed on. [00:02:01] Speaker C: He's like a dog chasing a car. [00:02:03] Speaker A: Yeah. He's like, what do I do now? So he just turned around and wiggled his ass at the audience. And I think he. [00:02:10] Speaker B: Jarvis Cocker? [00:02:11] Speaker A: Yeah. And I think he flicked the V's at Jacko at that point some of Jacko's backup dancers or his security came on stage and just grabbed Jarvis Cochrane, like, you know, dragged him off. Then they took him to the police cells that night and like a few people went down to bail him out. [00:02:31] Speaker B: He went arrested for that? [00:02:33] Speaker A: Yeah. I mean they didn't charge him or anything. Or whatever. But what was. [00:02:37] Speaker C: Yeah, what was he arrested for? Passing. [00:02:40] Speaker B: Yeah, it's like when Kanye west got on stage at The Grammys. To upend Taylor Swift. [00:02:45] Speaker C: Right. [00:02:46] Speaker B: You don't arrest somebody for that. Yeah. [00:02:47] Speaker C: Will Smith didn't get arrested when he slept. Chris Rock. [00:02:50] Speaker B: He should have. [00:02:51] Speaker C: That was assault. [00:02:52] Speaker B: That was definitely assault. [00:02:54] Speaker A: Well, Jacko's people had him arrested, I think. [00:02:58] Speaker C: I wonder on what grounds. [00:03:00] Speaker B: Yeah, I don't. That sounds specious, that argument. [00:03:04] Speaker A: Do you want to get your fucking phone out and look? [00:03:07] Speaker B: No, because I don't want to be on my phone. [00:03:09] Speaker A: Obviously. It was on national TV and was very well documented. [00:03:13] Speaker C: Which nation? [00:03:15] Speaker B: I'll look into it. [00:03:17] Speaker C: Which awards was it? [00:03:18] Speaker A: Brit Awards. [00:03:19] Speaker C: So which nation? It was on national team. So Great Britain. We might have missed it. [00:03:26] Speaker A: You're not telling me it didn't get reported here. [00:03:28] Speaker B: Was this in Great Britain or just [00:03:29] Speaker A: Britain is in the smaller Britain part of it? [00:03:33] Speaker B: Britain. [00:03:33] Speaker C: This is the not so Great Britain. [00:03:35] Speaker A: Yeah, it was shite Britain. [00:03:38] Speaker B: Hey, speaking of Britain in British talk here, big news in Britain. The wireless festival has been canceled. You know about this big music festival in London? Yeah. Because Kanye west was supposed to be the headliner, and then all the sponsors pulled out. [00:03:55] Speaker A: I thought Kanye got canceled. [00:03:57] Speaker B: He did, but they booked him for this festival. And then people are like, what? Why would you book this guy? He's. He likes Hitler. [00:04:04] Speaker A: Yeah, he does. [00:04:06] Speaker C: He likes it. [00:04:06] Speaker B: Yeah. Apparently, if you like Hitler, then. [00:04:09] Speaker C: He said that. [00:04:10] Speaker B: Are you kidding? [00:04:11] Speaker C: No, I'm serious. I'm. I'm way rock. [00:04:15] Speaker B: Yeah, well, it was a while ago now, but he's been. He has all kinds of anti Semitic messaging out there. [00:04:23] Speaker C: I know he had. Anti Semitic. I didn't know. He said he liked Hitler, though. [00:04:26] Speaker B: Oh, yeah. [00:04:26] Speaker C: Wow. [00:04:27] Speaker A: I thought he just went maga and that was it. [00:04:29] Speaker B: He was maga, too. [00:04:30] Speaker C: But then he's checking all the boxes. [00:04:32] Speaker B: But then like a week ago or maybe two weeks ago, he came out with. I think he took an ad out in the New York Times or New York Post, some publication, some newspaper, and said it was like an open letter to everybody saying how sorry he was for his anti Semitic rants and the things he said and the people he hurt. But his medication and his bipolar disease would run rampant and he was in a psychotic state. [00:05:00] Speaker C: Okay. [00:05:00] Speaker B: And I don't know, it was like a mea culpa. And I think that got him Kanye. He said that and did people. Mea culpa means like, my bad, my. [00:05:10] Speaker C: Sorry. What is that, Latin? [00:05:11] Speaker A: Mea culpa was in Ferris Bueller's Day off, wasn't she? [00:05:14] Speaker B: Mia. What was her name? [00:05:19] Speaker A: Pharaoh? [00:05:19] Speaker B: No, Mia Farrow. The Sloan Peterson. You mean, right? [00:05:22] Speaker A: Mamma Mia. Yeah. [00:05:25] Speaker B: What? [00:05:25] Speaker A: Mia. Yeah, Mia. [00:05:27] Speaker B: Her name was Mia something. Didn't really do much else, but anyway, they can't now. They're canceling the festival. So you going to London anytime soon? [00:05:37] Speaker A: Nope. [00:05:37] Speaker B: England? No. You don't usually make an annual trip about this time. [00:05:41] Speaker A: You know, the financials right now are a bit dicey. [00:05:45] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:05:46] Speaker C: Do you know the sister in Ferris Bueller ended up dating Ferris Bueller? Well, you know, not the characters, the actors. [00:05:53] Speaker B: Oh, yeah, I think I did hear that. Jennifer Grey, of course, you're talking about. [00:05:57] Speaker C: They got into a car accident in England, I think, or Ireland, maybe. [00:06:01] Speaker B: Oh, yeah. [00:06:02] Speaker C: What's the difference? [00:06:04] Speaker B: They were dating. Yeah, that's right. And I. But I think she also dated Charlie Sheen, too. [00:06:08] Speaker A: Wait, Sarah Jessica Parker was married to. [00:06:10] Speaker B: That's right. She still is. [00:06:13] Speaker C: Oh, good. [00:06:14] Speaker B: She still is. [00:06:14] Speaker C: I'm glad that marriage is standing the test of time. [00:06:18] Speaker B: Speaking of financials, I was not able to bring you all lunch today. I'm sorry, but I can no longer afford to be feeding you guys every week. [00:06:26] Speaker C: It's so funny, I was just thinking earlier today. How much money does he spend every week? I know you really go all out. Especially last week. You showed up with a bounty. [00:06:33] Speaker B: I did. And I was glad to know that you, you know, after I left. [00:06:37] Speaker C: You did it right. [00:06:38] Speaker B: You fried those. You. What did you do? [00:06:40] Speaker C: You put them in. I put them in the air fryer. [00:06:42] Speaker B: Air fryer? [00:06:43] Speaker C: Yep. Got them nice and crispy. And then I shook them in sriracha and hot honey barbecue sauce. [00:06:47] Speaker B: You really upped the game on this. [00:06:49] Speaker C: Oh, my God. You got to do it right with. Yeah, with fried chicken. [00:06:53] Speaker B: I. I've been making the Jewel a part of, you know, my everyday life, more or less. I'm in there a lot. I. This weekend. My. My wife's been out of town. I've been managing the family alone. And I went in there the other night, I got two dogs, a chicken sandwich, and a thing of nugs and said, dinner is served, kids. [00:07:12] Speaker C: There we go. [00:07:13] Speaker B: For $4. [00:07:15] Speaker C: Can't beat it. [00:07:15] Speaker B: You really can't? [00:07:16] Speaker C: No. [00:07:17] Speaker B: The price is in this jewel. They care about us. [00:07:20] Speaker C: Yeah, they do. [00:07:21] Speaker B: Have you been eating the Jewel? Were you waiting for a lunch today? [00:07:24] Speaker A: No. [00:07:25] Speaker B: You thought I was bringing lunch? [00:07:26] Speaker A: I almost texted and said, don't bring any. Any scran, because I have got Easter meal leftovers and I'm still. Day four. [00:07:36] Speaker B: Wait a minute. First of all, what is scran? [00:07:38] Speaker C: Scran is today's British talk. [00:07:41] Speaker B: Today on British Talk, we're going to Talk about the word scran and how it's used in a sentence. Food is scran. [00:07:48] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:07:49] Speaker B: Is it short for something? Scran. And now how. How would I use it? Don't bring any scran in. I've got leftovers. [00:07:58] Speaker C: Yeah. All right. [00:08:00] Speaker B: British talk. [00:08:01] Speaker C: Add that to the dictionary. [00:08:02] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:08:03] Speaker A: But I've still got one more meal to go and a lunch for Easter leftovers now. [00:08:11] Speaker B: So this upsets me on some level because you're referencing Easter and you're anti religious. Right. So I don't even want you talking about this holiday considering you're anti Christian. [00:08:23] Speaker A: Easter is not a religious holiday in England, is it? It's just. Just a great opportunity for chocolate. Easter was a favorite of mine because you got proper holiday. You got Friday and Monday off. [00:08:36] Speaker B: Friday and Monday. I like how you say Monday. [00:08:38] Speaker A: Friday and Monday. I say Monday Lot a lot of chocolate. I mean, I'm not talking a fat Yank amount. I'm talking a horrendous amount of chocolate. [00:08:48] Speaker B: Yeah. You really do it up for Easter for the chocolate. [00:08:50] Speaker A: Yeah. And then. Which is weird because England's not a Catholic country. [00:08:55] Speaker B: By no means. [00:08:56] Speaker A: Yep. And then what used to be my favorite part was that's when the speedway season would really kick in. So we'd be running right now in the country. Yeah, we'd be off. I mean, speedway's dead now, but when I was a youth, it was big still. And we would be. We'd see four or five meetings on that Easter weekend and you'd bring all [00:09:16] Speaker B: your chocolate and eat your chocolate and all your Scranton now. So did you get a lot of chocolate this weekend? Did Heather make you a basket? [00:09:24] Speaker A: No, we. [00:09:24] Speaker B: The boy. [00:09:25] Speaker A: We didn't get a bumper bounty because normally I have English. We have English friends come over and we chocolate the out of it. But [00:09:38] Speaker B: how you do like a little Easter egg hunter. [00:09:39] Speaker A: Proper. A proper Cadbury's Easter egg. They not hunt it. Just give it to them. [00:09:44] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:09:46] Speaker A: Proper Cadbury's Easter egg. You know, some proper Cadbury's bars and this, that and the other thing. But it was weird. Did you. Did you hit the Jewel and the thing? There was a chocolate famine this year. Yeah. [00:09:58] Speaker B: Not a lot of Easter product out there. [00:10:00] Speaker A: Nope. Even in Target. [00:10:02] Speaker B: Maybe. Because it's the Straight of Hormuz. [00:10:04] Speaker C: Oh, yeah. They can't get all that chocolate through that proper Cadbury. [00:10:09] Speaker B: We talk about the. We did talk about the Cadbury Egg in here. Or was it somewhere else? [00:10:13] Speaker C: I think we may have in the past. [00:10:15] Speaker A: I'm not talking about the. That. That shite that egg with the C in it. Big. [00:10:20] Speaker C: Big what though? [00:10:22] Speaker B: Like a big solid egg. [00:10:23] Speaker C: Motioning something with like a. It's like a foot high big. [00:10:26] Speaker B: It's an egg or bunny. [00:10:27] Speaker C: Wait, it's a foot large Chocolate bunny. [00:10:29] Speaker A: A chocolate egg. [00:10:30] Speaker C: Like an ostrich egg, but it's not solid. Is that. [00:10:34] Speaker B: Oh, okay. [00:10:34] Speaker A: Like let's say. Let's say you get like a, you know, a Snickers one. It would be the egg for. Filled with maybe five or six mini Snicker bars. [00:10:46] Speaker B: Okay, so inside the chocolate egg. [00:10:47] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:10:48] Speaker C: But it's not. It's not like the shape of a full egg. Right. It's flat. It's. That's a lot. [00:10:55] Speaker A: Shape of a full egg. [00:10:56] Speaker C: Where do you get the football? That's like a football. It's like a football Snicker. [00:10:59] Speaker B: It's a Protestant type of thing. [00:11:01] Speaker C: Yeah. Where do you find that? Cut it. [00:11:03] Speaker A: Well, here, you have to get it from one of these importer places. [00:11:05] Speaker B: Yeah, Importer exporter. [00:11:07] Speaker A: England. You just walk into any industries. [00:11:12] Speaker B: Yeah, you can't get that here. Yeah, you can't get that here. Can't get an egg filled with Snickers. [00:11:17] Speaker A: You can get from specialist import. If you go over to. What's the Patty bar on cheap O', [00:11:26] Speaker B: Neill, Lincoln, Ms. Murphy Sons. [00:11:30] Speaker A: Yeah, that they'll have. [00:11:31] Speaker B: They got importer exporter in there. [00:11:33] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:11:33] Speaker B: What, they're Irish in there? [00:11:37] Speaker A: They got a ton of English chocolate in that place. [00:11:41] Speaker B: Really? English chocolate. That's good. Is that. What's that, like a lint or. That's Swiss chocolate. Lint. [00:11:48] Speaker A: How about Kinder Cadbury's? [00:11:50] Speaker B: Cadbury. We used to say. Yeah, you take it up the Cadbury alley. [00:11:57] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:11:57] Speaker B: That means you have anal sex. [00:12:01] Speaker A: But even though no one knew what Cadbury was, we did. [00:12:04] Speaker B: We had Cadbury eggs. Cadbury Creme eggs. [00:12:07] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:12:07] Speaker B: Which is a chocolate egg filled with cum. [00:12:10] Speaker A: Why is American chocolate so foul and amateurish? [00:12:14] Speaker C: Because Hershey's. Hershey's cornered the market and they just made it terrible. [00:12:21] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:12:21] Speaker C: Put wax inside of candy bars and sold it for 80 cents. [00:12:27] Speaker B: How about you? You re religious over there for Easter? [00:12:30] Speaker C: Not. No. [00:12:32] Speaker B: You go to Easter vigil on Saturday night. [00:12:33] Speaker C: I forgot that it was Easter until about halfway through Sunday when somebody said, happy Easter. [00:12:37] Speaker B: Okay. No baskets, nothing. Chocolates. [00:12:42] Speaker C: No. I used to like that growing up. It was a nice holiday. You know, you find your basket and all that. [00:12:47] Speaker B: Yeah, my kids, we. My wife, we still do it. And you know, my kids are like. They have facial hair and they're looking For Easter? Yeah. [00:12:56] Speaker C: That's too old. I'm talking, like, from like 6 to 10 years old. [00:12:59] Speaker B: Yeah. There should be a cap on the Easter basket. If you have gift cards in there. [00:13:03] Speaker A: Just Gas card. [00:13:05] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:13:05] Speaker A: Just give a bunch of chocolate bars and go, here it is. [00:13:09] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:13:10] Speaker A: Throw it on the table. Let them fight it out. [00:13:12] Speaker C: I think that's what my parents ended up doing. Like, when we approached teenage, you know, like adolescents there, we would just wake up and they'd be like, here's some candy. Bring it to school with you. [00:13:19] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:13:20] Speaker C: You know. [00:13:20] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:13:21] Speaker B: No, I still had to hide the eggs. And we put, like, dollars in the eggs and hide them around, and they're still finding them. Really hit them. [00:13:30] Speaker C: Well, last Easter. Yeah. [00:13:31] Speaker B: Turn up all kinds of times. Well, I prayed for you. It was the resurrection of Jesus. And, you know, it's our most important holiday. I mean, today. It's fitting that we're talking about Easter and religion today when we later on talk about the great Ari Shaffer. [00:13:51] Speaker A: It's hilarious to me that you're still pretending to be religious. [00:13:55] Speaker B: What do you mean pretending? [00:13:56] Speaker A: Pretending? [00:13:57] Speaker B: I'm not pretending. [00:13:58] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:13:58] Speaker B: I am very religious. [00:14:00] Speaker A: I've never heard anyone talk about Lou Baker's asshole for five minutes and then go. [00:14:06] Speaker B: Can be both. [00:14:07] Speaker A: Anyway. Praise be. [00:14:08] Speaker B: I don't talk like that. I have a private relationship with Jesus Christ. [00:14:12] Speaker A: I just read a book called the High Mountains of Portugal by Jan Martel, author of Life of PI. And you like that? It's all about religion and stuff. [00:14:23] Speaker B: Yeah. All right, let's tell me about that later. I want to. I want to know about that. Any relation to Andy Martel, the comedian, fire eater? [00:14:31] Speaker A: That's Martello. [00:14:32] Speaker B: Oh, right. Andy Martello. Yes. Kicking around. [00:14:37] Speaker A: Yan Martel, author, Yan Martel. [00:14:42] Speaker B: No, I don't know. Life of PI. I saw that. Yeah, I saw that picture. [00:14:45] Speaker A: Well, the book is very, very good indeed. [00:14:48] Speaker B: Did they have a tiger on a boat? Yeah, they did. [00:14:51] Speaker A: Well, the animated in the movie. What's it called? Richard. Robert. What's he called? The tiger? Richard Jones. [00:14:59] Speaker B: I don't know. That was pretty good movie, though. A lot of cgi. See it? [00:15:02] Speaker C: No, I didn't. Is it worth it? [00:15:04] Speaker A: The book is exceptional. Yeah. [00:15:07] Speaker C: How about the movie? [00:15:09] Speaker B: Better. [00:15:09] Speaker C: Yeah. Less reading. [00:15:10] Speaker B: Hey, speaking of movies, did you see this? This big picture that's out project? Hail Mary? [00:15:16] Speaker C: No, not yet. [00:15:17] Speaker A: No. [00:15:17] Speaker B: Everybody, I mean, to talking about two [00:15:20] Speaker A: and a half hours. [00:15:20] Speaker C: Two and a half hours. So give me an intermission if it's gonna be two and a half hours. Yeah, like that. Everybody. Was talking about when it was popular. One battle after another. Yes. More like one scene after another. You know, it just never stopped after another. [00:15:33] Speaker B: That's a good joke. Did you steal that joke from somebody? No. One of the bulldogs? [00:15:37] Speaker C: No. I wish. Yeah, I wish we get those bulldogs in here jokes. [00:15:40] Speaker B: Oh, I meant to send you. [00:15:43] Speaker C: Send me what? [00:15:44] Speaker B: I'll send it to you right now. But I was at the grocery the other night at the Jewel in fact, [00:15:49] Speaker C: getting some hot dogs. [00:15:51] Speaker B: I don't know what I was getting. [00:15:52] Speaker C: I had a foot long hot dog the other day at the Sox game. [00:15:55] Speaker B: You did? Yeah. You've already been to Sox. [00:15:57] Speaker C: I did, yep. I went to a game they're doing [00:15:59] Speaker B: better than the Cubs. Cubs are in trouble. [00:16:00] Speaker C: Oh, are they? Oh, boy, I've not been paying attention. [00:16:02] Speaker A: They're bet Comiskey's just fucking empty. [00:16:07] Speaker C: Oh, you could sit wherever you want. [00:16:08] Speaker B: God, cheap tickets. [00:16:10] Speaker C: Oh, yeah. The ticket was $8. [00:16:13] Speaker A: That almost be glorious to sit in such a. [00:16:17] Speaker C: The hot dog was more expensive than the ticket. Yeah, I paid more for the hot dog than I did. [00:16:22] Speaker A: Do you remember that time that there was a hurricane in Florida? So the Marlins played a game that couldn't be played in Florida at Comisky? It was like. [00:16:33] Speaker B: Yeah, I remember that. [00:16:33] Speaker A: Yeah, I think C.J. sullivan went to the game. Did you go with. [00:16:36] Speaker B: I might remember. I don't know. But yeah, I remember that they played their games up here. It was like hurricane something. [00:16:42] Speaker A: Yeah. And it was like Marlins versus Cleveland or something. At Comisky. [00:16:48] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:16:48] Speaker A: That would have been fun to just be like, wow, there's 12 people in this stadium. [00:16:53] Speaker B: I think they got a halfway decent crowd. I don't remember. I just sent it to you. Did you get it on your flip phone on your Jitter? [00:17:01] Speaker C: Not yet. [00:17:01] Speaker B: Jitterman. The Jitterman. [00:17:03] Speaker A: You know the film? [00:17:04] Speaker B: Not yet. [00:17:05] Speaker A: Can I bring up the film I watched? [00:17:06] Speaker C: It's come all the way. All the way from over there. Bill across the room. It's gonna take a while. [00:17:10] Speaker B: I know. [00:17:11] Speaker A: I watched Secret Mall Apartment on Netflix this weekend and it was inspirational. [00:17:17] Speaker C: Yeah, what is it? [00:17:17] Speaker B: Oh, I've heard about this Secret Mall apartment. This is the guy that lives in the mall for like 10 years and nobody knows. [00:17:22] Speaker C: Oh, I know. I've heard about this guy. [00:17:24] Speaker B: Not Jump Man Roofman. Not similar though. [00:17:27] Speaker C: Yeah, he found like a little like crevice in the wall and kind of took. Yeah, he lived there. [00:17:31] Speaker A: They. They say they live. They didn't live. It was this. It was eight. Like art students. [00:17:36] Speaker C: Yes. [00:17:37] Speaker A: And they were using it as a base more. I mean, they did sleep overnight occasionally, but to say they lived there is bollocks. But it is inspirational. After I watched it, I thought, God, what have I done with my life where I couldn't pull something like that off? [00:17:52] Speaker C: You can live above this podcast studio. [00:17:56] Speaker A: Well, we already. We already. [00:17:58] Speaker C: We know it works. It's been done. [00:17:59] Speaker A: We already trialed that. Thanks you to the bar staff, certain bar staff, I should say. [00:18:07] Speaker B: I think you sell yourself tremendously short. I don't think you realize the impact of what you've done. Have you ever been asked to be a guest speaker anywhere? Mark Gehry. They bring you in to talk about what you do or you never have? Well, I never had either until this morning. I was brought in at the college by a colleague, wanted me to talk to her class about the summer camp I run, you know, as a way of like telling students, hey, you could be a teacher, but you know, you should probably get a side hustle too, so you can also make additional money, right? And so I was brought in as a guest speaker this morning in front of the class and the students all asked me questions, right? And I felt important. And I. And it in been doing this 25 years, and in this moment, being a guest speaker, I realized I actually, I did. I've done something. You know, I think you would benefit from that because you don't see yourself as having done anything with your life. You're sitting in what you've done here, right? You've changed this man's life over here, right? You've changed my life. I never touched many ways, never touched him, right? So now here you're looking at some idiot who lived in a wall of a mall and saying, why haven't I been able to do anything with my life? That guy lived in a mall for. Are you insane? That guy's done nothing. And you've done quite a bit. [00:19:26] Speaker A: No, he did a lot of stuff. He did art stuff as well. [00:19:29] Speaker B: Oh, what? [00:19:31] Speaker A: He showed kids how to make these murals just using masking tape. And you could put them on the wall and take them off and stuff. And they did a project where they went to. After 9 11, they went to Manhattan. It is a bit art student. Normally I would turn my nose up at it and be like a bunch of art students. But obviously they interview him a lot in the thing. And I'm like, oh, this is someone who genuinely is like, you know, I need to make things better, even if the way he's doing it might be a bit squirrely but yeah. And I thought, God, to. To sit back and say, I pulled that off, that would be something amazing. [00:20:10] Speaker B: Well, you pulled this off, right? [00:20:13] Speaker C: You could still live in a mall, too, if you wanted to. You know, it's not too late. [00:20:17] Speaker B: Yeah. Mall support. Anyone could live there. [00:20:20] Speaker A: No one. [00:20:20] Speaker B: Seriously. [00:20:21] Speaker C: I was the time. [00:20:22] Speaker B: Empty space. [00:20:24] Speaker C: You could have a mall mansion. [00:20:25] Speaker A: Never mind an apartment at the end of it, they said. That's the irony. These kids got kicked out, you know, and then they sealed it up and everything. Now, that mall, obviously, is part of the general downturn of malls. They're actually thinking about turning part of it into apartments. [00:20:40] Speaker C: Into apartments, of course. [00:20:42] Speaker B: That's kind of cool, right? Like, a lot of people been talking about how to reinvent the American mall into something they've tried and failed. Many different iterations. [00:20:51] Speaker C: I'd live in a Gap. [00:20:53] Speaker B: Yeah, live in a Gap. [00:20:54] Speaker C: That'd be great. [00:20:55] Speaker B: Like, to live at the mall. I love them. All [00:20:59] Speaker C: shades you raise up and down. [00:21:01] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:21:02] Speaker C: Your neighbors are mall walkers. [00:21:04] Speaker B: Yeah, right. Could there be a. Be, like. [00:21:07] Speaker C: There could be a mall village. [00:21:09] Speaker B: Yes. [00:21:10] Speaker C: Why not? [00:21:11] Speaker B: Has this been thought of? [00:21:13] Speaker A: Yeah, this could be a great. Old apartments. [00:21:15] Speaker B: Yeah. But at the mall, this. [00:21:16] Speaker C: We just came up with a great idea. [00:21:18] Speaker B: If this isn't an idea. I love this idea. [00:21:21] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:21:21] Speaker B: Like, make it a retirement. [00:21:23] Speaker C: Could be your big thing. [00:21:24] Speaker B: It could be retirement housing. Because old people love the mall anyway. To walk and stuff, you turn that into their homes. [00:21:32] Speaker A: Have you been in a mall recently? They are depressing. Yeah, dude. Oh, my God. That's. [00:21:39] Speaker B: They are. They are. You just feel dumb to go to the mall to buy anything because you're like, I'm. I know I'm paying more at the mall. Right. So, like, you can't. Does. It can't work as a business model, but it could work as housing. I like that idea. [00:21:57] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:21:57] Speaker B: Or make it into, like, some kind of skate park. [00:21:59] Speaker C: I'd want to live at the old Bed, Bath and Beyond. [00:22:02] Speaker B: A lot of space and smell. [00:22:03] Speaker C: Great. [00:22:05] Speaker A: Did you watch Wait, no. [00:22:06] Speaker C: I mean, Bath and Body Works? [00:22:08] Speaker B: Both. Yeah. [00:22:09] Speaker A: You watch the series where the guy goes to abandoned buildings and skateboards around them. [00:22:14] Speaker C: I've never seen a series inside them. Yeah, I've seen videos of people doing something similar. [00:22:20] Speaker A: Yeah, Obviously he goes to a mall. [00:22:22] Speaker C: Yeah, that's perfect. All those rails, fountains. [00:22:28] Speaker B: Hey, would it be funny if one of us farted onto the mic? You know, like. Because I could fart right now. [00:22:37] Speaker C: I don't. Yeah, go for it. [00:22:39] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:22:40] Speaker C: Yeah, do it. Why not? [00:22:41] Speaker B: Is it gross, though? [00:22:42] Speaker A: Like, well, other people that I'm sitting not two feet away. [00:22:46] Speaker B: I know, but. Yeah, you'll smell it. [00:22:49] Speaker C: We could open the door. [00:22:50] Speaker A: Nah. [00:22:50] Speaker C: Should I do it? [00:22:51] Speaker A: Hold it in. [00:22:52] Speaker B: Hold it in. [00:22:53] Speaker C: He's just gonna fart silently into the seat cushion over time. If you don't let him fart into [00:22:57] Speaker A: the mic, then come back. [00:22:58] Speaker B: Yeah, it's probably not a good idea. [00:23:02] Speaker C: He's gonna fart anyway. [00:23:04] Speaker B: It's not like. [00:23:06] Speaker C: Are you just farting? [00:23:07] Speaker B: I would hate for people at work to, like, know that I'm doing that, you know, so I'm not gonna do it. [00:23:13] Speaker C: Oh, right. [00:23:14] Speaker B: But when I retire from work, I'll do all that kind of stuff. Wait till I retire. I'm just gonna, like, come alive like Peter Frampton. [00:23:22] Speaker C: The world can't wait. [00:23:23] Speaker A: I think in about. [00:23:25] Speaker B: Hey, What? [00:23:26] Speaker A: In about 20 years, I think I'll be gone at this point. But dead 20 years, yeah, I think [00:23:32] Speaker B: you'll probably be dead. [00:23:33] Speaker A: Malls and retail will come back to where people are like, you know what? It's fun. [00:23:39] Speaker B: No, I agree. [00:23:40] Speaker C: That's what happened with Barnes and Noble. There was a Barnes and Noble on Diversity by Clark, and it went out of business, you know, like they all did. And then one day it was back, and I was in the car with somebody. I said, why did. There's a Barnes and Noble back? [00:23:53] Speaker B: No, they're back. [00:23:54] Speaker C: They said because of TikTok. Because of a TikTok trend was enough to boost Barnes and Noble back into existence, which I'm sure. I mean, as soon as that fad ends, they're just gonna shut them all up again. [00:24:06] Speaker B: But nobody's going in there and buying stuff. They can't be making rent off of books. [00:24:09] Speaker C: That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. No one's buying books at a Barnes and Noble anymore. [00:24:13] Speaker B: It's just advertising. [00:24:14] Speaker C: You can't build it. And they will come. It's not always true. [00:24:17] Speaker B: No, I think you're right. There'll be a mall revival. I wanted to go to the Mall of America for spring break, but I couldn't convince my kids. That'd be good. [00:24:25] Speaker C: That's one with a roller coaster, right? [00:24:26] Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah. They got a theme park there. Have you been up there? [00:24:29] Speaker A: No. [00:24:31] Speaker B: Put that on the list of things that the three of us are going to do someday. But first Monday. [00:24:37] Speaker C: Yeah, we got a game coming. [00:24:38] Speaker B: Blackhawks Monday, right? [00:24:41] Speaker A: Second worst team. [00:24:43] Speaker B: The Blackhawks are. They're bad. [00:24:44] Speaker A: Only. Only the Canucks are worse. I just looked it up, okay? [00:24:48] Speaker B: And I'm not following the standings. But it doesn't matter to me. I get to wear my Blackhawks jersey. I almost wore it today. To give you a preview of what I'm gonna wear on Monday. I'll be wearing my Bobby Orr Blackhawks jersey. Authentic. [00:25:02] Speaker C: Very nice. [00:25:03] Speaker B: Very nice. What will you be wearing, Mark? [00:25:06] Speaker A: I think I've still got my black Black Hawks jersey. [00:25:11] Speaker B: Oh, that's cool. [00:25:11] Speaker A: I gave my signed Chris chelios to the Mrs. Once. [00:25:15] Speaker B: Chris Cheli is at the Russian bathhouse like five years ago and he had. Had just like neck surgery and he was like, had like a tube coming out of his neck naked. What will you be wearing, Christian? [00:25:28] Speaker C: I've kind of evolved into just wearing. [00:25:30] Speaker B: You're wearing sabers. [00:25:31] Speaker C: Classy street gear, you know, street. Street clothes. And then I'll pop on a nice festive looking Sabers cap during the game. [00:25:40] Speaker B: So just normal street wear, like hip clothes. [00:25:43] Speaker C: Yeah, SA cap. But sometimes I'll try to incorporate some dark blue or gold into the colors that I'm wearing to represent the team subtly and. And then I'll pop the cap on to erase any question of is this guy. Who's this guy rooting for? [00:25:56] Speaker A: Why don't you put your bills? That really comes. [00:26:00] Speaker C: I don't think they're playing that game. [00:26:01] Speaker A: Well, no, but. But it'll annoy him. [00:26:03] Speaker C: Yeah, that almost does make it worth it. [00:26:07] Speaker B: Hey, what about that Whalers jersey I gave you? You still have that? That thing's nice. You sold it? I gave you as a gift and you sold it. You're a piece of shit. That is horrible. I appreciate the honesty, but like, somebody gives you a gift that was like. That was dear to me. And I was like, I know Mark would love this and I must have. [00:26:27] Speaker A: I'll check. Maybe I kept it so, you know, [00:26:29] Speaker B: like, I wanted to be closer to you and so I gave you that nice gift and then you fucking sold it. [00:26:35] Speaker A: The. So what do you believe the Sabers colors are? Blue and yellow or black and red? [00:26:42] Speaker C: Okay, right. They're blue and yellow, aren't they? The official colors are blue and gold for a while. For a period, their official colors were black and red. Right now they were. [00:26:50] Speaker B: When not in my life. [00:26:52] Speaker A: Dominic Hasek. [00:26:54] Speaker B: They were black and red. [00:26:55] Speaker C: Yeah. Very late 90s. And then they switched again to the Buffa Slug, which is probably the worst jersey they ever had. And then they resorted back to their original colors of blue and gold. So their third jersey is the black and red that they'll wear every, like, I don't know Every two months. [00:27:10] Speaker B: Are they good this year? [00:27:12] Speaker C: They were terrible until December 13th when they went on a winning streak to rival any of the best teams in the NHL. And now they are bouncing from between first and second place in the. In the Atlantic division between who they got. [00:27:27] Speaker B: That's good. That I'll keep an eye on Tampa [00:27:29] Speaker C: Bay Lightning, which they just beat the other night. They have Alex Tuck. Are you familiar? [00:27:33] Speaker B: No. [00:27:34] Speaker C: Tage Thompson was on the Olympic team. Gold medal for the US Recently. [00:27:38] Speaker B: Who? Paige Thompson. [00:27:39] Speaker C: Tage Thompson. [00:27:40] Speaker B: Don't they have. They don't have the goalie. Do they help? [00:27:46] Speaker C: Lundquist played. [00:27:47] Speaker B: No, not Lundqvist. The guy now. [00:27:48] Speaker C: Helek Ukonen, the guy that won the gold, he plays for Winnipeg. [00:27:53] Speaker B: Oh, okay. How about Pat La Fontaine? Is he on the team? [00:27:58] Speaker C: No, he works for the New York Islanders instead of the Sabers because they. The Sabers just really screwed up their whole front of house and all the good guys they used to have now work for other teams. [00:28:05] Speaker B: He used to play for those Sabers. [00:28:07] Speaker C: Yeah, he did. [00:28:08] Speaker B: Played with Mo Gilney, I believe. [00:28:10] Speaker C: Alex the Great. There is a great story about him defecting from Russia that you can watch a little like 15 minute documentary on YouTube. [00:28:17] Speaker B: Pass that along. What are we gonna. Are we gonna go out to eat before. What do we. What is the plan for. Whatever you're not bringing. Are you bringing the misses? No, just you and me, right? [00:28:28] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:28:29] Speaker B: And then we'll. [00:28:29] Speaker A: We'll take the bus next seat up from him. [00:28:32] Speaker B: You got the Mrs. Right? [00:28:33] Speaker C: Yep. And then. Yeah, then usually the plan is meet somewhere in like the Wicker park area where the six corners are there. You know, peace. [00:28:41] Speaker B: We could go to peace. They got a nice piece. [00:28:42] Speaker C: Yeah, right. Something like that. Exactly. [00:28:44] Speaker B: And be in our jerseys and then [00:28:45] Speaker C: hop on the Damon bus and, you know, drops you off right in front. [00:28:49] Speaker B: Yeah, we gotta take Damon bus. I have parking at Malcolm X. Oh, yeah, that's good. Yeah, we can park if we want. You know, free parking. What's that? Somebody rattling the door? [00:29:01] Speaker C: No, the Borky. I moved this. [00:29:03] Speaker B: Oh, okay. Well, I'm looking forward to that. [00:29:05] Speaker A: All right. [00:29:06] Speaker C: Yeah, it's gonna be a good time. I went to a Blackhawks game a few months ago and it was just like the White Sox game. It's not nice and empty. You know, you kind of sit wherever you want. [00:29:14] Speaker B: Can we move down? [00:29:15] Speaker C: I'm sure you will be able to. [00:29:16] Speaker B: Do you want to move down? [00:29:18] Speaker C: Yeah, I mean, there's. There's a number of people I know that are trying to get tickets in the Same section. So I think the plan is to try to all. [00:29:26] Speaker A: Have you identified a weak spot in the ushering regime? [00:29:29] Speaker B: No, I have to get in there and eyeball it. [00:29:32] Speaker C: I don't think they care very much. [00:29:33] Speaker B: You might have to chip. Chip the usher a sawbuck, you know, [00:29:38] Speaker C: I mean, if you're in the same section, you can just sit, you know, as long as you're not sitting in somebody's seat that shows up and says, that's my seat. [00:29:44] Speaker A: No, I was talking about getting down into. [00:29:46] Speaker C: Oh, into the 100 level. Oh, yeah, we can definitely try that. Yeah, you gotta try to get by the ice. [00:29:51] Speaker A: Yeah, I don't really have the stones to pull it off. You gotta be brazen. [00:29:54] Speaker B: Oh, you got. [00:29:54] Speaker C: You gotta walk. You know exactly what you're doing. [00:29:56] Speaker A: I own this fucking place. [00:29:58] Speaker C: Right. [00:29:58] Speaker B: And then they stop you and you go. [00:30:02] Speaker C: Yeah, you just go up. [00:30:03] Speaker B: All right. You know, you have no shame. I get humiliated getting, like, escorted away. [00:30:09] Speaker C: Imagine how many people they. That try that and they catch every time. You're just another face in the crowd. [00:30:13] Speaker B: Most of the ushers don't give a. [00:30:15] Speaker C: No, they don't care. They're. [00:30:18] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:30:19] Speaker C: How much do you think they get paid? $37,000 a year. [00:30:23] Speaker B: I don't know. They could get a salary. They get an hourly wage. [00:30:26] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:30:27] Speaker B: They get the minimum. [00:30:28] Speaker C: Do you think health benefits? [00:30:29] Speaker B: No. No. All right, well, you know, I didn't put an agenda today together because. Agenda today together. I didn't put an agenda together today. I think I just had a stroke. Have you ever had a stroke? Mild stroke? [00:30:48] Speaker A: It reminds me of that joke. Two nuns sitting on the. On the bench. The flasher runs up, whips it out. One nun had a stroke, but the other couldn't reach. [00:31:01] Speaker B: Ah, meaning one of the nuns stroked the flasher off. [00:31:05] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:31:05] Speaker B: And the other one couldn't reach. [00:31:07] Speaker A: Couldn't reach. [00:31:07] Speaker B: Had a stroke. It's a good joke. I think we need more jokey. Jokey jokes like that to share with one another. [00:31:13] Speaker C: What do you call an Irish guy that stays outside all night? [00:31:18] Speaker B: Don't know. [00:31:19] Speaker C: Patio furniture. [00:31:23] Speaker A: Would have been better if it was Patty. [00:31:25] Speaker B: But [00:31:27] Speaker C: why? [00:31:29] Speaker A: Because our Patty. [00:31:31] Speaker B: Patty. He did say Patty. Patio furniture. [00:31:34] Speaker A: I think he said Patty. [00:31:35] Speaker B: No, patio furniture. Patio. [00:31:37] Speaker A: Patio. [00:31:38] Speaker C: Patio. [00:31:38] Speaker A: Okay. [00:31:39] Speaker B: Furniture. It's not bad. It's, you know, it's well written. Well, this, you know, the delivery was fine. It was just, you know, let's just review. This wasn't body enough. Like his. His is about a nun stroking off a vagrant. [00:31:54] Speaker C: Yeah. I guess. You have to know Your audience, don't you? [00:31:56] Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah. [00:31:57] Speaker A: Flasher. [00:31:58] Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah. Well, I'm. I want to do more treacle, but I am also excited to talk about this guy today. This Ari Shaffer. Shafir. Ori Shafir. [00:32:11] Speaker C: Amir. [00:32:12] Speaker B: Amir Shafir. [00:32:13] Speaker C: Right. [00:32:13] Speaker B: No. Amir. It's not a mirror. [00:32:15] Speaker C: What is it? [00:32:16] Speaker B: Ari. [00:32:17] Speaker C: Ari. [00:32:17] Speaker A: Ari. So let's start with the lookalike game. [00:32:22] Speaker B: Well, I. I've already written it down and I know you're going to get it immediately. Go there. [00:32:27] Speaker C: Who does he look like? I don't know. [00:32:28] Speaker B: Well, maybe you don't know this person, but if he doesn't look just like Prescott tol y right? [00:32:35] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:32:36] Speaker B: God in heaven, Prescott to must be grinding his teeth watching this, thinking, this guy stole my life. [00:32:43] Speaker C: You know who I think he looks like? One of Jeff Dunham's puppets. [00:32:46] Speaker B: Really? [00:32:46] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:32:48] Speaker B: I'm familiar with Jeff Dunham. [00:32:50] Speaker A: Yeah, the old guy. [00:32:51] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:32:58] Speaker A: I've never actually seen Jeff Donald. I've only ever seen him pictured with his pop. [00:33:03] Speaker C: Yes. [00:33:03] Speaker B: Yeah. In the picture. [00:33:04] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:33:05] Speaker C: That's all you need. [00:33:06] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:33:06] Speaker B: We've never seen him live. I think he's got to come up on the. [00:33:09] Speaker C: You're. [00:33:09] Speaker B: You're picking today. Bring. Bring in Dunham. [00:33:12] Speaker C: I'm picking up next week. [00:33:13] Speaker B: You can. [00:33:14] Speaker A: Yeah, let's get there with the matter in hand. [00:33:17] Speaker B: You want to. You in a hurry? You trying to go somewhere? I could really crop dust this mic right now. I had a bad night last night while watching Ari Shafir really got into the sugar. [00:33:30] Speaker C: You were watching it late too. [00:33:31] Speaker B: I know. I was texting you. [00:33:33] Speaker C: Were you up? I was already in bed by that point. [00:33:36] Speaker B: Yeah? [00:33:36] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:33:37] Speaker B: Why are you texting me on the side? Why? I thought he was on the text. That's why. [00:33:40] Speaker C: He doesn't like getting text messages. I'm being considerate. [00:33:42] Speaker B: Like, I didn't even confirm with you because I thought I confirmed because you text me you were on there, but you weren't. No, he likes to text me, take you off. [00:33:50] Speaker A: It's really weird with you. In many ways, you're a plan ahead sort of guy. You get all these primo tickets to luxury events. Well, ahead of the time. [00:33:59] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:34:00] Speaker A: But when it comes to this podcast. [00:34:03] Speaker B: Oh, the whole board. We still online. [00:34:06] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:34:06] Speaker A: Yeah. That was just the shitty mixer thing that we've never used. That was 300 well spent. Yeah. Yeah. When it comes to this podcast. [00:34:18] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:34:19] Speaker A: You're sitting over here. You're so gung ho. [00:34:22] Speaker B: Coming over closer to you for this. [00:34:25] Speaker A: No. If you. [00:34:26] Speaker C: Are you farting on him. [00:34:27] Speaker B: I'M not farting. I did fart. I was just coming. Just playing around with the arm of this mic and just seeing where I can be. Why you didn't want me close. [00:34:35] Speaker A: Why is it the rest of your life seems to be planned? I bet it's the Mrs. Doing it, right? [00:34:41] Speaker B: The Mrs. What do you mean? She's planning my life? No, what do you mean? What are you driving at here? That I'm not organized about? The podcast. [00:34:49] Speaker A: Podcast. It's like, oh, do you want to go podcast in 30 minutes time? [00:34:56] Speaker B: No. [00:34:56] Speaker A: Yet you buy tickets months in advance of events. [00:35:01] Speaker B: Yeah. Let's see. I see what you're trying to say here, but I. I don't know what the. Why you think I'm not organized around this? We meet every Wednesday, noon. Unless otherwise. If anything. If anything, it's you two. Sorry to drag you into this. It's you two who are, like, don't confirm or anything. [00:35:23] Speaker C: I. I'm the one texting you, saying, are we on? All right. Y. That's how this all started on. [00:35:28] Speaker B: We're on. We're always on. [00:35:30] Speaker C: You did fart, didn't you? [00:35:30] Speaker B: I can see I didn't fart. [00:35:32] Speaker A: Remember that time we missed three shows in a row? Yeah, because. [00:35:36] Speaker B: Stop waving the door. I didn't fart. [00:35:38] Speaker C: It smells like it. It's psychosomatic. [00:35:41] Speaker A: Yeah. Can we get back to the matter in hand? [00:35:44] Speaker B: No, I'm not ready to get into that. But listen, we've met. We. We. We cranked out 45 episodes in a year, son. That's. That's prolific. That is consistent. So there's no issue here with this not being on point or organized or I'm, you know, slapdash about this. There's nothing like that. So take that back. Take it back. [00:36:10] Speaker A: Nope. I'm leaving it out there. Christian's probably gonna back me on it. Not that I'm pushing him to. [00:36:18] Speaker C: I'm Switzerland over here. That's why I'm texting. [00:36:22] Speaker A: That's where Lindt chocolate comes from. [00:36:24] Speaker B: Switzerland. [00:36:25] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:36:26] Speaker B: I like a Toblerone. [00:36:27] Speaker C: Yeah, me too. [00:36:28] Speaker B: Yeah, that's my favorite chocolate. [00:36:30] Speaker A: That's definitely Switzerland because they're made to look like the Alps. That's. [00:36:34] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:36:34] Speaker B: Yeah. Oh, yeah. I never put that together. The triangle is supposed to be like the Alps, like how you break off a piece of it. Yeah, it's in those. You know, breaking up. [00:36:42] Speaker A: You buy the giant ones from the airport. [00:36:45] Speaker B: Yeah. From the duty free. They're huge. [00:36:48] Speaker C: Each one is its own Toblerone. [00:36:50] Speaker B: Yeah. It's enormous. [00:36:51] Speaker C: Each Chunk. [00:36:52] Speaker B: Yeah. Each chunk is bigger than a towel. [00:36:56] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:36:57] Speaker B: All right, we've done chocolate. Do you have anything you want to talk about? Anything going on in your life? [00:37:01] Speaker A: No agenda. [00:37:02] Speaker B: No agenda. It's been a quiet week. Yeah. [00:37:05] Speaker C: I'm seeing a play with David Byrne in it tonight. [00:37:07] Speaker B: I want to see that. The thing at the Goodman, or it's not at the Goodman, but it's through the Goodman. [00:37:11] Speaker C: Something where there's only 16 people. [00:37:13] Speaker B: Yeah. What did. Tell me about the. What is it about? I just had burn attached and it looked interesting. [00:37:17] Speaker C: I just. I just. [00:37:18] Speaker A: The annoying art school wanker. [00:37:20] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:37:20] Speaker C: Talking heads guy. [00:37:21] Speaker A: Yeah. God. [00:37:22] Speaker B: You think he's a wanker? [00:37:23] Speaker A: Let's talk about how much I hate talking heads. [00:37:26] Speaker B: Really? [00:37:27] Speaker A: Yeah. God, I hate pretentious. [00:37:29] Speaker B: You find it pretentious? [00:37:30] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah, yeah. [00:37:33] Speaker B: I like him, you know. Well, that'll be fun. [00:37:36] Speaker C: I only like to see plays that he said. [00:37:38] Speaker B: Yeah. Well, did you see American Utopia? No, that last one. [00:37:42] Speaker A: I stood next to him at the bar in Doubletall. [00:37:45] Speaker B: Really? And at the double door, he was there. [00:37:48] Speaker A: I was watching. Watching this awful band called Red House Painters. And he. All of a sudden he. He wore this coat. It made him look like a polar bear. Enormous white coat, white fur coat. [00:38:03] Speaker B: She's not trying to be conspicuous. [00:38:05] Speaker A: Definitely trying to be inconspicuous. [00:38:08] Speaker B: Inconspicuous. [00:38:08] Speaker A: And my first thought is what twats wear in a coat like that. And then I was like, David Byrne, that is. [00:38:14] Speaker B: She's. He really wanted to be noticed. [00:38:15] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:38:16] Speaker C: He likes big coats, clothes. [00:38:18] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:38:19] Speaker C: The big suit, right? [00:38:20] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:38:21] Speaker B: Big biker. You know, he bikes like you all over New York City. You can see him. People see him all the time biking around. Yeah. Well, the. My understanding what you're seeing tonight is it's like an immersive art, something like that. [00:38:32] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:38:33] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:38:33] Speaker A: If it's only 16 tickets, how did you score one? [00:38:36] Speaker C: I don't know. Barky got him. Yeah, Yeah. [00:38:38] Speaker B: I was only 16 people at a time. [00:38:40] Speaker C: That's what I think she said. [00:38:41] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:38:41] Speaker A: Cool. Whoa, cool. [00:38:43] Speaker B: Hey, speaking of which, I was gonna reach out. I thought maybe the lodge may have gotten some comps to Shane Gillis over the weekend. Did you guys go? Wait, he was at the United Center. [00:38:51] Speaker C: I did see something. [00:38:52] Speaker B: There's some people began construction went. He had front row down there. [00:38:56] Speaker C: Oh. [00:38:57] Speaker B: Some high end friend of his brother [00:38:59] Speaker A: said it was good tickets for a high end. Backsplash. [00:39:03] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. Backsplash business is good, I guess. [00:39:06] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:39:08] Speaker B: He had Marty. Not Marty Derosa. Joe Derosa. You know who that is? Yeah, I do see a local. It sounds familiar. Is there a Marty DeRosa? [00:39:16] Speaker A: There's a Marty, he's a comedian. [00:39:18] Speaker B: Right, He's a zany's guy. [00:39:20] Speaker A: No, he moved to Wisconsin. [00:39:22] Speaker B: But he was a zany's guy. [00:39:23] Speaker A: No, he was local, alt guy. Very, very, very riff oriented. Marty, improvisational. [00:39:31] Speaker B: Marty DeRosa. [00:39:32] Speaker A: Yeah. Joe DeRosa is a very, very good comedian that the Lincoln Lodge lost its ass on. [00:39:38] Speaker B: Really? [00:39:39] Speaker A: Back in the diner days. [00:39:41] Speaker B: He came to the diner. [00:39:42] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:39:43] Speaker B: And you booked him and thought he was gonna bring in droves and he was crickets. [00:39:47] Speaker A: I didn't book him. Someone else booked him saying he's a really good comedian, I think we can sell it. [00:39:53] Speaker B: And then we just ate shit on it. [00:39:55] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:39:56] Speaker B: So he had to perform to an [00:39:57] Speaker A: empty room, like a third half empty. And then also to add insult, the person had bodged the financial deal. You know, it was meant to be kind of a, you know, stages type thing. If you get this, we'll pay you this, blah, blah, blah. Yeah, bungled it and we had to pay. I don't even know how much we lost on it. [00:40:17] Speaker B: Oh, Jesus. But he's since made good, right? Was he on his way up at the time? [00:40:22] Speaker A: No, I think he's still pretty, pretty high up. [00:40:26] Speaker B: I didn't know. I don't know. [00:40:27] Speaker C: I think he's part of that whole. We were just talking about it last week, or was last week. But the whole Bill Burr, all things comedy sort of group. [00:40:33] Speaker B: He's part of that. [00:40:34] Speaker C: Yeah, he comes up a lot on the podcast, so I think he's part of that whole crew. [00:40:37] Speaker B: Gillison Burr together. [00:40:39] Speaker C: No, just the Rosa. [00:40:40] Speaker B: Oh yeah. And then he said there's some opener. Some kid was just working stuff up. Imagine opening at the United center and just working out bits in front of 15,000 people. [00:40:54] Speaker A: Did he get the name? It can't be local. [00:40:57] Speaker B: I don't know. [00:40:58] Speaker A: I suppose if you hit the message boards, it'll. Message boards always. Apparently they discuss people who open and they're quite matters. Nasty. [00:41:08] Speaker B: Oh, like he didn't deserve to vote. Yeah, I'm sure. Like, is there still a Chicago Haha Hago listserv for comedians? [00:41:15] Speaker A: No, no, I'm talking about Reddit for the old. [00:41:17] Speaker B: Well, it's like Reddit fans. [00:41:18] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:41:19] Speaker B: Hahahago is like Reddit now, right? [00:41:21] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:41:22] Speaker B: Does the Lodge ever get comps to big events, like to the United center [00:41:28] Speaker A: or what do you think this is like? [00:41:30] Speaker B: I'm just trying to understand why, I [00:41:32] Speaker A: don't know, the Buckingham palace of Comedy. [00:41:35] Speaker B: No one ever throws comps at you like, hey, we know you're a big wheel in the dude. [00:41:39] Speaker C: No, no. [00:41:40] Speaker A: I've been working in Comedy now for 25 years. No one's given me the steam off their piss. Not let alone, let alone comp tickets. [00:41:49] Speaker B: You got the comp tickets to the thing at the Riv for the. I don't remember what that game show, the Kamal game show thing. [00:41:57] Speaker A: Oh, yeah, that, that's. Yeah, I'll admit that. That, that was a surprising aberration last week. That's probably the only free tickets I've ever. Part of me as well is I pay to go to things out of respect because I'm tired of seeing everyone in comedy trying to freeload all the time. [00:42:16] Speaker B: So now I feel bad because you didn't make me pay for those best selling tickets. I want to pay for them. Now you're basically calling me a freeloader. [00:42:25] Speaker A: When I saw T.J. miller at the Vic, paid for the tickets. When I saw Sherman at the Vic, paid, paid for the thing because they're artists. I respect them. [00:42:33] Speaker B: And so when I went and saw TJ at the, at the thing and CJ put me on the list, I should have paid. [00:42:39] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:42:40] Speaker B: What a piece of the whole thing. Like, it's not even the money. I just like feeling like I got. I want to be on the list. [00:42:48] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:42:48] Speaker B: And that's what I want. [00:42:49] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:42:49] Speaker B: I don't care about the money. I'll pay them. [00:42:51] Speaker A: And that's why I really hate it. [00:42:53] Speaker C: Why doesn't like feeling good? [00:42:55] Speaker A: Yeah, I don't want people to feel good. I don't want people to feel like they're on this list. [00:42:59] Speaker C: There it is. Doesn't want people to feel good. [00:43:03] Speaker A: Respect artists get off the list and feel bad. Yeah. [00:43:07] Speaker B: Well, but when Bobcat was here, you were all like, you want to go meet Bobcats? Like trying to, you know, [00:43:15] Speaker A: that was [00:43:15] Speaker B: like you were trying to put me on the list. I didn't even ask. [00:43:17] Speaker A: How did I say it was? [00:43:18] Speaker B: I moved my shoulder, Bobcat. And I was like, no. [00:43:22] Speaker A: And I was jiggling my shoulders from side to side. [00:43:24] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:43:25] Speaker B: Because you're out in the hallway and like front of the green, like, you want to meet bobcats. And I was like, man, so you're, you're trying to push the list that night. [00:43:33] Speaker A: Feel like that's the reason comedians want to get into stuff for free. It's not even the, the blagging. It's the look at me. Yeah, you scumbags are paying for this But I'm so important. [00:43:46] Speaker B: Yes. [00:43:46] Speaker C: Feels good. [00:43:47] Speaker A: That's why it's wrong with this planet. [00:43:50] Speaker B: It's okay to feel good once in a while. Get a massage, have your ego. [00:43:54] Speaker A: I feel good. 8 hours solid work, 40 hours a week, year in, year out. [00:44:01] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:44:02] Speaker A: That's the way to feeling good. [00:44:03] Speaker B: I don't disagree. Respect. I respect that you're a hard working guy. No doubt about it. You also like to carry a cross around like our friend Jesus. So everybody sees that cross you drag [00:44:22] Speaker A: around the heather hallways here. Most of your things you complain about of your own making. [00:44:29] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah, you create things to complain about. You love it. [00:44:35] Speaker A: You love it. You slag. [00:44:37] Speaker B: Slag. All right, well, we've covered it. Anything for you to bring up over there. When's your big trip to Spain that's coming? [00:44:47] Speaker C: Like the 20th or the 21st of this month. Yeah. [00:44:50] Speaker B: Damn. [00:44:51] Speaker C: Yeah, it's coming up. [00:44:52] Speaker B: Are we gonna have to miss a show? [00:44:54] Speaker C: Yeah, probably. I was actually gonna ask you guys if you wanted to do two next week. [00:44:58] Speaker B: Okay. Next week might be. I think we got cubs. [00:45:04] Speaker C: We have enough in the barrel. If we miss one, we got. [00:45:06] Speaker A: Yeah, we can miss one. [00:45:07] Speaker B: That's one. [00:45:08] Speaker C: Oh, okay. Let's do that then. [00:45:10] Speaker B: Will you use your get out of jail? [00:45:12] Speaker C: Yeah, I'm using my mullet. It's not a ball again. I didn't. Because I didn't try. And then, you know, it's my. Get out of jail is better. [00:45:19] Speaker B: We got a couple on the can. [00:45:20] Speaker C: Go with that one. [00:45:20] Speaker B: We got a couple on the can. All right. [00:45:24] Speaker A: Talking of in the can, Harry Sheffield. [00:45:26] Speaker B: Yeah, that's a good, great segue. Very much in the can with Ari Schaefer. Is that. Am I saying his name right? I. [00:45:35] Speaker C: The beginning of this year, I think. [00:45:37] Speaker B: Shafir. [00:45:37] Speaker C: Yeah, Shafir. [00:45:39] Speaker B: And he said Ori when he was like, someone talking to him. Ori. Ori. Maybe that was just the way the guy said it. Ari, is how I want to say it. Ari Shafir, in his special from 2022, aptly titled Jew [00:46:00] Speaker A: 90 minutes. [00:46:02] Speaker B: Damn. I didn't know. I'll say that. And that's Christian texted me last night, was like, oh, thanks a lot for this hour and a half. And I was like, what? I was in the middle of watching it when you texted and I didn't know. And I was like, what? And I paused. I was like, oh, man, I'm only 50. I thought it was almost done. And I looked at. Looked up and I had 40 more minutes. [00:46:23] Speaker C: I thought I was gonna sneak it in before bed and I put it on. Yeah. No, so an hour and a half. And you, you had just texted me about the vegan chili. Yeah, that's, that was perfect timing to be like an hour and a half. Come on. [00:46:35] Speaker B: Had you finished it at that point? [00:46:36] Speaker C: No, I watched half an hour of it, went to bed and I watched the other hour this morning. [00:46:39] Speaker A: It's not just an hour and a half. It's an hour and a half of the same premise repeated for 90 minutes. [00:46:45] Speaker B: Oh my God. I, I, I couldn't believe that at various points during this special I was still listening. Did this guy talk about Jewish stuff? He's still talking about Jewish and has not ever changed the subject. I mean there are different things within the Jewish topics, but it was unbelievable for this man to talk about being Jewish. [00:47:15] Speaker C: I learned an hour and a half. It was very educational, especially considering he [00:47:19] Speaker A: stopped being Jewish 30 years ago. [00:47:22] Speaker B: Yeah, right. He's not even religious, I guess he would say. Right. He is a religious historian, I'll give him that. [00:47:29] Speaker C: Yeah, he knows a lot about. [00:47:31] Speaker B: Yeah, well, we've kind of tipped our hand here. I guess it doesn't really matter in terms of. But no, this was, this was remarkable. Wasn't it like to, to watch somebody go on for an hour and a half and just talk about religion in a funny way or in a comedic way and never ever get off course. And it would be horrendous if there weren't stretches in here that were hilarious. Did you find that, like, I'm surprised that I didn't hate it entirely out of hand. Like it was. [00:48:09] Speaker C: Oh, I didn't hate it at all. You didn't? No, no, I didn't hate it. [00:48:12] Speaker B: I didn't hate it either. [00:48:14] Speaker C: It was the same topic the whole time. But I thought, I mean I, I enjoyed the entire 90 minutes. If I had to sit there in the theater, that might be a different story. Yeah. Because I was kind of laying on my back for a while just listening to it. Cuz I'm like, I already know what he looks like. I don't need to. [00:48:30] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:48:30] Speaker C: Be watching it. [00:48:32] Speaker B: I don't even know how I feel about this. Right. Like, but there were some stretches where I was like got laughing. [00:48:40] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:48:41] Speaker B: Like really laughing hard. Harder than I've laughed for almost any comedian we've looked at. [00:48:45] Speaker A: There's definitely enough filth in there for you. [00:48:47] Speaker B: Yeah, there's a lot of filth. Right. He's hard, he's hard to pin down, but yet he's not at all hard. He's a one note guy. I mean. [00:48:58] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:48:58] Speaker B: Is he always like that? Because after this ended, I was wondering. [00:49:02] Speaker A: No, I went and watched a couple of clips because out of the gate, I'm like, if this is going to be 90 minutes of identity and religion, I am never going to make it through this. [00:49:13] Speaker B: But it was. So you didn't make it through it. [00:49:15] Speaker A: Well, the guy is a good enough comedian. [00:49:18] Speaker B: He's a really good comedian. [00:49:20] Speaker A: He's a really good comedian that I could. I could keep going, but afterwards I thought, this guy's a really good comedian. What's he like if he's not doing 90 minutes of juju? Jew. Religion, religion, religion. So I watched a couple of his clips and he is really good. [00:49:38] Speaker B: He's really good. And he's not talking about. [00:49:40] Speaker A: He was talking about, like, war and things. You know, just topical stuff. Yeah, yeah. [00:49:45] Speaker B: I would. I would be really interested to see how he. [00:49:47] Speaker A: I mean, there's a million clips of him. Yeah, you can go see. Well, that was what I thought. I was like, he's really good. He can't do this all the time, but I bet he's good when he just talks about general stuff. And he is. [00:50:01] Speaker B: Yes. Well, when this one finished, you know, because on YouTube, the algorithm spit out an older one. It was called, like, Passive Aggressive. And I let it play for a few minutes before I went to bed just to see him in a different context. And I didn't really listen to any of the jokes. I was done at that point. I don't want to hear another word out of this guy's mouth. But I did look at him and he looked very different. [00:50:25] Speaker C: Yeah, I saw. [00:50:26] Speaker B: Right. Like, he had long, like, shaggy hair and was heavier and different glasses. Or you look like a different guy completely. Right. Very gaunt and thin. [00:50:37] Speaker C: I only saw, like, the thumbnail that they put up there because it was recommended next. I didn't actually watch it, but, yeah, I did notice he had hair. I didn't notice he was bigger, though. [00:50:44] Speaker B: Yeah, he was thicker. [00:50:47] Speaker A: On a recent clip, he had big, soft burn chops, but with a patch shaved out of the. [00:50:54] Speaker C: Oh, that's so weird. Like that Civil War style. Yeah, I don't like that. Don't do stuff like that. [00:51:01] Speaker B: Well, I should have done the research. I hope maybe one of you guys did. I mean, this was my pick, and I'll say why I picked last week, right. I was out in the car on Western before I came in here texting with somebody, and somebody said, hey, you should do this. This guy, one of My buddies. Give it up to B Rock, who chose this guy. Also want to say a shout out to my. My very good friend and. And one of our avid listeners on the birth of Al Kormos on the birth of his daughter Ellie Therese last night. Give it up. He just had a daughter. All right, this is one of our big listeners. Come on, you got to give it up for our listeners. Listen to all our programs. [00:51:47] Speaker C: I don't even know if this person's real. [00:51:48] Speaker B: It is a real person. Look, there's the baby. [00:51:52] Speaker C: It could just be any baby. [00:51:53] Speaker A: Oh, wow. [00:51:54] Speaker B: Yeah. Had a baby last night. His third daughter. Three daughters. [00:51:57] Speaker A: This guy's Charlie's Angels. [00:51:59] Speaker B: Yeah, he's got Charlie's Angels. But this B Rock said, you gotta. You should listen to this guy for the show. And I forgot it was my pick. And I was like, in the car outside here last week, I was like, done doing this guy. And it was Passover. [00:52:13] Speaker C: Right. [00:52:13] Speaker B: Last week. And you're always saying bad things about Jewish people. And I was like, we should work in some Jewish comedian. [00:52:23] Speaker C: Right? [00:52:23] Speaker B: Because you, you know, [00:52:27] Speaker C: you're [00:52:29] Speaker B: virulently virulent. How do you say it? Virulent. Virulent. Virulently. Vir V I R U L E N T. Virulent. Virulent. [00:52:40] Speaker C: Virile. [00:52:41] Speaker B: Virulently virulently or vehemently dead? Virulently anti Semitic. So is this your rabid anti. Semitism? [00:52:54] Speaker A: I think you're virulent. I think you're trying to generate something out of nothing to combat my highlighting your misogyny. That's what this feels like. Yeah. [00:53:05] Speaker B: No, you're not. For the record, Marx. Anti Semitic. He's anti religion. And he will definitely chide me for being religious, which is rude and whatever. [00:53:24] Speaker A: Still haven't got the sound effects. [00:53:26] Speaker C: I have it. I just don't have the cord in here for it. Remember, I downloaded it last week. [00:53:32] Speaker A: You just need a. You just need a. What's it, one. [00:53:34] Speaker C: I know what I need. [00:53:36] Speaker A: An eighth incher. [00:53:37] Speaker C: Yeah. But I also needed to put. [00:53:38] Speaker B: You need an eight incher, I'm your man. [00:53:40] Speaker C: Yeah. You got anything for me? [00:53:42] Speaker A: That. What's that? [00:53:43] Speaker B: If you need an 8 inch, this [00:53:44] Speaker C: is 8th inch to 8th inch. [00:53:45] Speaker A: Oh, yeah, that's what you need. [00:53:46] Speaker C: No, I don't. I need 8th inch to iPhone. [00:53:50] Speaker A: 8 inch to iPhone. Doesn't even exist, does it? [00:53:53] Speaker C: Yes, it does. [00:53:55] Speaker B: Oh, we'll figure that out. Around with that. But no, I. I thought, you know, you're always, you know, di. Ing the department of equity and inclusioning this program and saying, I only choose whites and men. And all this thing shows a white man that is, you know, from a marginalized group, the Jewish community. Marginalized. What about Jew? The. The name Jew or the. Not the name, the term Jew. Do you have any hesitation saying it? I feel like I'm saying something wrong. [00:54:31] Speaker C: Jewelry last night on my way home, he's a Jew. [00:54:34] Speaker B: Like I said something wrong. [00:54:35] Speaker C: I stopped to pick up some dinner on the way home from here last night, and I was talking on the phone. I was telling somebody, I have to watch a comedy special when I get back. And I said the name of it. I said, what is it? Ari Shafir. Right? I said, ari Shafir, Jew. And the guy behind the counter looked up at me. I just kept talking. So I knew I didn't say anything wrong. You know, that is just the title. But yeah, before I said it, I was thinking, this feels wrong to say, but that's the title, and that is just. Jewish people exist. You can say Jew. [00:55:05] Speaker B: It seems wrong to say, right? [00:55:06] Speaker C: And as soon as I said it, sure enough, heads spin. [00:55:09] Speaker B: You know, my whole life I've felt wrong to say just Jew. Like, oh, my friend Todd, he's a Jew. [00:55:15] Speaker C: He's a Jew, right? [00:55:16] Speaker B: I would say, oh, my friend Todd, he's Jewish. Jewish is okay to say, but you can't say Jew, right. It feels like I'm Hitler saying Jewish. [00:55:24] Speaker A: Jewish. Meaning he's vaguely Jewish. No, he's Jewish, but he's a vague. [00:55:31] Speaker B: Oh, yeah, yeah, that's right. [00:55:32] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:55:33] Speaker B: That's weird. [00:55:33] Speaker C: It is a weird way to say it. [00:55:34] Speaker B: I'm surprised Ari Schaefer didn't talk about it in his hour and a half. Said about everything. [00:55:39] Speaker C: He had to wrap it up an hour, 29 and 30 seconds, right? [00:55:42] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:55:43] Speaker A: Do you want to know something funny? I worked with a guy who was Asian and his second name was Jew. And I said, how? [00:55:52] Speaker B: J, O O. [00:55:54] Speaker A: No, J, E, W. And I said, how did you come by that second name? And he said, oh, when my parents came from China, they heard that it would be a good thing. Good name to have in America. [00:56:09] Speaker B: Come on. Like that was trying to sidle up to the Jewish community. Jeu. [00:56:15] Speaker A: Yeah. No, genuinely does his name on his bloody email. [00:56:20] Speaker B: They just made it up. [00:56:22] Speaker A: No, I'm assuming it was originally Chew. [00:56:25] Speaker B: Oh, Chew. But they just made it Jew. [00:56:27] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:56:28] Speaker B: Wow. Well, that. That tells you what the Chinese perception is of America or maybe the world at large. I don't know. They think America's A very Jewish country. [00:56:39] Speaker A: Yes, they do. [00:56:40] Speaker B: They do, yeah. I think they think of us as hillbillies, shit kickers, you know, that kind of cowboy type of country. Now Trump, [00:56:52] Speaker A: I mean, I guess it's changed recently. Trump has obviously very much become the focus. But most, I think, like, when I came to America and I was very pro American, I was very interested in American culture. I thought, and this is going to sound utterly ridiculous, but it is the truth. I thought America was about 40 white, 40 black, 20%, like a mixture of Latino and Jewish, Asian, whatever, just hodgepodge. That's what I gentle white, half black, based on what I had consumed. You know, America as a foreigner, American culture is rammed down your throat. So you have a perception of it. There's no avoiding it. And that's what's interesting. [00:57:43] Speaker B: Totally wrong. Those ratios. Yeah, those ratios are way off, but massively off. Yeah. And maybe we're off and you can. Christian, tell me what you think. When I think of England, I think of the ratio being 100% white and not one other person of any other race. [00:57:59] Speaker A: You don't think Asian? Like, I don't think there's another. [00:58:02] Speaker B: When I think of England, I don't think of one other ethnicity at all being there. Like, I can't even picture an Asian or. [00:58:09] Speaker A: Idris Elba never happened to you. [00:58:11] Speaker B: I can't imagine there ever being anyone but white, because that's our perception. [00:58:17] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. [00:58:18] Speaker B: Of the, you know, the monarchy and the royal family and, you know, the stodgy English guy. Monty Python and there's no diversity, ethnic diversity that we ever see of England here. I mean, Idris Elba, I guess. But, like, growing up, we didn't see anything. [00:58:35] Speaker A: There was no. [00:58:35] Speaker B: None presented. [00:58:36] Speaker C: Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels in movies like that. That didn't. [00:58:39] Speaker B: Yeah, well, what about movies like that? They show diversity in there. [00:58:43] Speaker C: Like People Guy Rich movies. [00:58:45] Speaker B: I don't. Maybe, No. I don't know. [00:58:47] Speaker A: But yeah, everyone thinks it's Harry Potter and. Yeah, it's not. It's a very. [00:58:53] Speaker B: It's probably very diverse or somewhat not so much diverse. [00:58:56] Speaker A: It's very gritty and very working class. Working class and. Yeah, that's what people don't really miss. [00:59:02] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah, for sure, for sure. We don't think of that being that way at all. But there's got to be good diversity in the city, right? You know, you get Jamaicans in there, you get Pacific Islanders, Caribbean folk, because you've. You've pillaged most of the world. [00:59:22] Speaker A: Wind Rush. When what Windrush generation. So after the war, have I said this? [00:59:29] Speaker C: I don't know. [00:59:30] Speaker A: After the war, obviously Britain lost a lot of people, right. And so after World War II, the country needed rebuilding, but people were dead or incapacitated, blah, blah. So they sent word to the colonies, come to Britain, there's a place for you here. We need workers, we need people. So a lot of West Indian people and a lot of Asian, you know, India, Pakistan, answer the bell came to the country. Here was the problem with that. Not a problem here was what happened. Unfortunately, having just gone through World War II with bombs raining down on them, most of Britain was very xenophobic because they're like, we're not really like foreigners. We haven't, it hasn't gone so well recently. We had two world wars, blah, blah, blah. And so the problem coming in was those people were not welcomed by the native islanders. A, because, you know, they're a bit stupid anyway, but B, because of this feeling of like, From World War II, xenophobia, of like, we don't want foreigners. Foreigners mean trouble. So that was, that was always. I didn't think about that till recently. [01:00:53] Speaker B: I think America is going through something similar now. [01:00:56] Speaker A: That's. Yeah, that's what brings it up. I think it's like most countries need, especially Western countries are aging out, right? [01:01:06] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:01:07] Speaker A: And so they need young people to come in from other countries. Why does it always fail? Why is there just the Magaz and the National Front and the blah, blah, blah there to F it up? Makes you think it's got to be a way to kind of pull it off, like encourage immigration, but prepare the natives so it doesn't always go tits up. How would you do it? [01:01:39] Speaker B: Well, just give the natives the good jobs and give the immigrants the bad jobs. Then everybody's happy. [01:01:45] Speaker A: But then the immigrants get like in England after the war, then the immigrants got all the shitty jobs. And of course what the right wing does is go to the, to the working class people and go, these are stealing all your jobs. You know what I mean? [01:01:59] Speaker C: Yeah. [01:02:00] Speaker A: It's like, how do you stop that? [01:02:04] Speaker B: Well, I don't know. [01:02:05] Speaker A: It all pertains to this special. [01:02:07] Speaker B: I don't know how it pertains at [01:02:08] Speaker A: all, but I'm gonna shut up. Too much talking. [01:02:15] Speaker B: Well, I, it doesn't pertain anything to this special because this special only pertains to Jewish stuff, right? [01:02:23] Speaker C: Yeah, that's true. [01:02:24] Speaker B: Is there anything that he didn't cover? There's one thing, unless I missed it, because I, it, I'll say this like, this was so long. And I could not keep focusing on Jewish stuff because I, like, it's interesting a little bit. And then, like, I. I feel like, what the. I care about all this Jewish stuff. And then he's, you know, talking about the Talmud. I don't. I walk out of the room. Like, I. I'll come back in a little bit, get something to eat. [01:02:45] Speaker C: I thought it was kind of funny. I didn't mean to cut you off. [01:02:47] Speaker B: No, go. [01:02:49] Speaker C: I thought it was kind of funny how in the beginning he was like, you silly Christians with all your different kinds of Christianity and then went on and named six different kinds of Judaism. [01:02:56] Speaker B: Right, right, right. [01:02:57] Speaker C: You just said, okay. [01:02:59] Speaker B: So, like, I was only half paying attention, but there was something I was surprised he didn't talk about, but maybe he did. Did he talk about circumcision? [01:03:07] Speaker C: No. [01:03:08] Speaker B: How does he not talk about that? In an hour and a half? He covered everything under the sun. [01:03:13] Speaker C: Maybe he did, but it was cut. [01:03:15] Speaker B: Oh, wow. Nicely done. [01:03:18] Speaker A: I, like, one hour in he goes, have you heard about Jewish stereotypes? And I was like, yeah, I've just sat through an hour of it. [01:03:24] Speaker B: Yeah. There were a couple points here where, like, I. I wrote down at the one hour and eight minute mark, like, he shifted gears and he started a new thread about. I was like, you gotta be kidding. Like, people we don't want anymore. Right. Like, that's most of what I was right now. Like, stop. Enough unrelenting religious humor. Stop. When will this end? [01:03:51] Speaker C: Was that the point where he started setting up his final joke? Yeah, because there's a long setup to it. [01:03:56] Speaker B: No, this is before that, the Sodom. And please, no more. Stop this act. Why does every joke have to be about religion? Please make it end. When will it end? [01:04:08] Speaker C: That's. I think. Yeah, it was way too fucked up. Oh, yeah, it was. It's a lot on one subject. [01:04:14] Speaker B: It is. Am I missing something here? [01:04:17] Speaker C: No, no. I think he just put out this thing. He's like, this. It's all going to be about this thing. I titled it appropriately, you know, and take it or leave it. [01:04:27] Speaker A: He did. He did enough to pull you along. Just when you thought, I'm giving up on this, he pulls you back in. It did the sex through a sheet bit. [01:04:38] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:04:38] Speaker C: That was a great callback. [01:04:39] Speaker A: Yeah. And then the chicken killing. [01:04:44] Speaker B: That was amazing. [01:04:45] Speaker C: There was another option. We could have been feeding goldfish. [01:04:48] Speaker B: Yeah. Like, some of the writing is unbelievably good. It's so good. [01:04:53] Speaker C: Right. [01:04:54] Speaker B: But it's buried in all this fucking Jewish morass that we don't need to hear about. Right. Cut a 45 minutes out of this, right? [01:05:03] Speaker C: Yeah. This could have been 45 minutes for great bits. [01:05:07] Speaker B: This is killer. But it's so watered down. [01:05:10] Speaker C: Yeah, that's a really good point. This could have been half the length and probably as a result, much better. [01:05:16] Speaker B: Right. But. But that sheet, that thing where he creates the visual of the guy, what [01:05:22] Speaker C: does he call it? [01:05:22] Speaker B: A walking glory hole. That's fucking brilliant. [01:05:26] Speaker A: Ghost with a boner walking around. [01:05:29] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. [01:05:30] Speaker A: I mean, that's. That all the way through. I kept thinking, this guy is a really good comedian. [01:05:35] Speaker C: Yeah. [01:05:35] Speaker A: It's just. This is wrong, right? [01:05:38] Speaker C: Yeah, yeah. It's like. It's like when a band comes out with a. Oh, God damn. What's it called? [01:05:44] Speaker A: Like a concept. [01:05:45] Speaker C: Concept album. Right, Exactly. [01:05:47] Speaker B: Yeah. This is kind of like Matt R. Crowd work. Right. He's only going to do it this way and only going to stay on this topic. But like, I. I also thought it was great for, you know, like, nothing is sacred you. Not nihilism. But like, he's attacking everything. [01:06:03] Speaker C: Right. [01:06:03] Speaker B: And we, last week we talked about how, you know, who was it that was attacking women in their act. [01:06:09] Speaker C: Bill Burr. [01:06:10] Speaker B: Bill Burr, right. He attacked women and I loved that. Right. Like, he just went after somebody or went after a group here. Schaefer's going after every religion, Right. And he goes after Catholics hard. And I. That was some of my most favorite material. He's attacking me is a very devout Catholic mass every week. And I loved it. It was spot on. Like where he talks about, you know, priests raping children. Right. He said, stop. Stop raping children. When raping adults is a step in the right direction, then, you know, you've got a problem. Like, just brilliant. So good. [01:06:50] Speaker C: Did you see during the closing credits that the. The set, all the candles behind him was designed by the director, I think. Yeah. And she. She built it with. I don't want to it up. [01:07:06] Speaker B: I didn't understand a lot of the stuff behind glass. [01:07:09] Speaker C: Yeah. The menorah behind glass for Hanukkah. Yeah. [01:07:13] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:07:15] Speaker C: I thought. I really liked the set. You know, I thought the. The candles were cool. And then to find out that it actually had something to do with the special itself, I thought was a nice touch. [01:07:23] Speaker A: When I saw the candles, I thought. I bet the lighting film guy saw that. [01:07:27] Speaker C: Oh, my God. Yeah. [01:07:29] Speaker A: They would hate that. [01:07:30] Speaker C: Nightmare. [01:07:31] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:07:32] Speaker B: But. But what a unique. Never saw anything like that for a set or backdrop. [01:07:37] Speaker A: Really cool. It's cool. But I bet the Lighting, sound, Lighting director guy was like, Jesus Christ. Are you trying to make this unfilmable? [01:07:46] Speaker B: Why? Just because of the glow from all the candles. But it didn't. It looked good. [01:07:49] Speaker C: Yeah, they pulled it off. [01:07:50] Speaker B: Where was this shot? [01:07:52] Speaker C: It was in Brooklyn. [01:07:53] Speaker A: It was the roulette into something. I was like, what the hell is that? [01:07:59] Speaker C: He said he wanted to film it in Brooklyn because even though he's done this act in Jerusalem, he felt that Brooklyn, that New York City is the headquarters for the Jewish people in the U.S. is it? Yeah, that's how he felt, at least about it. So that's why he chose that venue. [01:08:17] Speaker A: The director, who he also shouted out, I recognized his name. So I went in my inbox and I've dealt with him. [01:08:25] Speaker B: Oh yeah. [01:08:26] Speaker A: Several bookings. Yes. [01:08:27] Speaker B: Who was the director? [01:08:28] Speaker A: His name is Eric Abrams. He used to work for Comedy Central and now works for one of the big. What's. It's. I think one of the big agencies. I was like, I know that guy. [01:08:40] Speaker C: Just a heads up, we've got five minutes left on the SD card. [01:08:43] Speaker A: Oh, God. [01:08:44] Speaker B: Okay, so we gotta, we gotta finish in five minutes. Yeah. [01:08:47] Speaker C: Or447. [01:08:50] Speaker B: Well, let's do, let's. Yeah, let's make sure we wrap it up in five minutes. Okay. So where is this guy? And I was thinking about this today in the shower. I don't know why that matters, but we've, we've really gotten. Given ourselves a PhD in comedy over this past year. [01:09:09] Speaker C: Yes. [01:09:10] Speaker B: If you really think about it, you [01:09:11] Speaker C: should put one of those up on the wall behind me over here. [01:09:13] Speaker B: We've all earned a PhD in comedy and we've learned so much about different comedians. We've really achieved that goal. Right. Mark that. We set out to bring ourselves somewhat current with what's out there. Still a long way to go. But where is this guy? Where is he in the echelon or the upper echelon of comedians today? Right. He's an. I don't even know if he's a niche comedian because he's Jewish. [01:09:36] Speaker C: Right. [01:09:37] Speaker B: Just doing Jewish type of humor. I think he's. [01:09:38] Speaker A: No, I'm special. All the other clips are just general. [01:09:42] Speaker B: Is he a bit. Could he do the United Center? Is he touring big? [01:09:47] Speaker C: I don't think he could do the well known Center. He could probably do the Vic. Yeah. [01:09:50] Speaker B: If he came to town, where would he perform? The Lincoln Lodge. [01:09:55] Speaker A: I don't know what his social media following is. [01:09:58] Speaker B: That's what I'm saying. [01:09:58] Speaker A: Have the time to look it up. [01:10:00] Speaker B: I'm Curious as to all the comedians that we. We look at. Like, how big are they? How big is this guy? [01:10:05] Speaker C: Well, his name was familiar to me when you brought him up last week. Yes. And, I mean, just by watching him, you can tell he's been doing this forever, you know, like, how old is he? [01:10:14] Speaker B: 40s? [01:10:15] Speaker C: I would say probably 50s. [01:10:17] Speaker B: Really? [01:10:18] Speaker A: He's 54, I think. [01:10:20] Speaker B: Wow. [01:10:21] Speaker C: Yeah. [01:10:22] Speaker A: Did you read the bit about he got in big trouble for celebrating the death of Kobe Bryant? [01:10:30] Speaker B: He did. [01:10:31] Speaker C: Oh, why would he celebrate the death? [01:10:33] Speaker A: He didn't celebrate it. He. He dissed him with bringing up his rape trial and saying his. This. His death came 20 to 20 years too late for the. Oh, yeah, that got him in trouble. Big trouble. [01:10:50] Speaker C: It'll do it. [01:10:51] Speaker B: What else are you finding out there on the wire? [01:10:54] Speaker A: I can't remember what I was looking up. [01:10:55] Speaker B: He's 54, so, no, he's never come through here. These. This room. [01:11:01] Speaker A: Don't recall. Yeah, no, he's definitely not done the Lodge. Yeah, 52 is what he is. [01:11:08] Speaker B: 52. Cool. [01:11:11] Speaker A: And his Instagram. Whoa. 757,000 followers. [01:11:17] Speaker B: Is that a lot? I don't know. Is that a lot by today's standards? [01:11:20] Speaker A: That's gonna put you at the vic. [01:11:22] Speaker C: Yeah, for sure. [01:11:23] Speaker B: How many would, like, say, Hannibal Baress have for followers? He's got a mill. Millions, I would think. [01:11:29] Speaker A: Millions. [01:11:30] Speaker B: How about tj? Has he got that many? [01:11:32] Speaker A: I think he's probably got at least a mil, Teach. Yeah. [01:11:36] Speaker B: Yeah. How about Siege? Cj? [01:11:38] Speaker A: Siege? Maybe a couple of thousand. [01:11:40] Speaker B: How about Khalil? [01:11:44] Speaker A: I don't know. For now, he's. I thought he got canc. [01:11:46] Speaker B: All right, two minutes. Two minutes to glory. Two minutes to glory hole. How many walking glory holes are you gonna award to Ari Shafer? I thought that was maybe as. [01:11:54] Speaker C: Out of four. I'll give an easy three. [01:11:57] Speaker B: Three out of four glory holes, definitely. [01:11:59] Speaker C: I really. I did enjoy it. I love. I love a good. I love something I can learn something from. Yeah, I thought his. I thought his closing joke was great. I thought the whole setup and then [01:12:08] Speaker B: the reveal was the bring back to the butt fucking. [01:12:10] Speaker C: Yeah, well, just. No, just the rainbow. When. When he gets to the rainbow part and he lets you kind of figure it out for a second yourself first. [01:12:17] Speaker B: I'm lost. I don't really. [01:12:19] Speaker C: I really enjoy. [01:12:20] Speaker B: I was in and out, but yeah. Okay, Mark. He's given it three out of four [01:12:23] Speaker A: walking glory to Too many flaws. [01:12:25] Speaker B: Too many flaws. What were some of those flaws? [01:12:27] Speaker A: Length, for sure. Breadth of subject. Too much filth. I mean, there's just a few things going on here that I'm not digging. [01:12:36] Speaker B: You didn't like the filth? [01:12:37] Speaker A: No. Two out of four? [01:12:39] Speaker C: Yeah. [01:12:39] Speaker B: I don't think he needs the filth. Like, he's a smart comedian. I don't. The juxtaposition of being smart and filth does not work for me. [01:12:48] Speaker A: Right. [01:12:48] Speaker B: I just be filthy or be smart. Okay, we're down to one minute. [01:12:52] Speaker C: Yeah. 45 seconds. [01:12:53] Speaker B: 45 seconds. I'm gonna use all my time here to say Ari Shaffer, Jew, one of the best comedians I've ever seen in a special that I never want to see again because it's way too long and way too much about one subject. I want to know more. And I'm going to give him. I'm going to give this special two out of four, but I give him three out of four walking glory holes. All right, as a comedian. [01:13:22] Speaker C: And then, Mark, what do we got next? [01:13:24] Speaker A: We're gonna do. I had to pick a female to specifically annoy Bill. Whitney Cummings. Can I. [01:13:31] Speaker B: It's gonna be awful. [01:13:33] Speaker A: Whitney Cummings. Can I touch it? [01:13:35] Speaker C: Okay, sounds good. Yep.
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