Review: Men Are Pigs, Tim Allen

[00:00:09] Speaker A: Maybe I'm hating this. [00:00:11] Speaker B: Diced onions, Andrew. [00:00:12] Speaker C: Diced onions. Clay. [00:00:14] Speaker B: You're hating what? You're hating the show today. [00:00:16] Speaker A: Yeah, you. [00:00:18] Speaker B: You seem to be in a mood. [00:00:20] Speaker C: He came in with a foul look on his face. [00:00:22] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:00:22] Speaker B: He walked right by the room. He knew it was in here and said nothing. [00:00:26] Speaker A: Well, the TV is. That TV job we were just doing is distressed me to no end. [00:00:31] Speaker C: I'm in a great mood. [00:00:33] Speaker B: You seem to be in a great mood. [00:00:34] Speaker C: I am. [00:00:35] Speaker B: You're like Jack the Lad. [00:00:36] Speaker C: I am Jack the Lad. I feel like Jack the Lad. [00:00:38] Speaker B: What does Jack the Lad mean? You're out trying to bed women. [00:00:41] Speaker C: Who is the first Jack? [00:00:43] Speaker A: Jack the Lad is like a young guy who's just, you know, making the moves, doing, you know, having fun, living life. [00:00:50] Speaker B: That's him. [00:00:51] Speaker C: Yeah. Like, that's him. John Lovitz's character in Seinfeld when he has the wig. Remember? Check this out, Jack. [00:01:00] Speaker B: Yeah, I remember that one. Yeah, that's when I do remember. [00:01:04] Speaker C: Want to know something I discovered? Borky and I were out in Galena playing a gig and on the way this weekend. [00:01:10] Speaker B: Yeah, I love Galena. [00:01:11] Speaker C: It's a blast. We do that gig maybe once or twice a year. It's always a good time. Great little town. Of course, you know, when you're driving out anywhere and driving back, you drive, trading off and you're finding ways to pass the time. This time I came up with something pretty good. I was looking up scripts of Seinfeld and just reenacting the entire episode from the passenger seat as we're driving along. [00:01:32] Speaker B: You're looking up the scripts and then reading. [00:01:34] Speaker C: I do the whole episode with stage direction. Stage direction? Yeah, seeing everything, you know, if it's. If it's necessary. This feels like it's coming. [00:01:42] Speaker B: That really passes the time. [00:01:43] Speaker C: It really did. 40 minutes went by like that. I did the Voice episode first, you know. [00:01:48] Speaker A: Hello? Hello. [00:01:53] Speaker C: Okay. Since it's a lot of talking, though [00:01:56] Speaker B: it won't be as apropos. My gift for Christian today is seasons one and two. Dvd. Pass that over to my friend. [00:02:03] Speaker A: I thought you were still DVD less. [00:02:05] Speaker C: I don't have a DVD player now. I'm compiling so many DVDs that you'll [00:02:09] Speaker B: have to get one. [00:02:10] Speaker C: I'm gonna have to get one better. Are we on the gifts already? Speaking of said trip, I did stop at. There's an antique store. Could we just. We can just go one at a time, right? Sure, sure. [00:02:20] Speaker B: There's no rules on this, right? [00:02:21] Speaker C: No rules. That's what I Like about this podcast, no rules. There's this antique shop that we always stop through in Elizabeth, Illinois, a town of 700 people. I've looked at Elizabeth. [00:02:32] Speaker B: Go ahead. [00:02:32] Speaker C: All right. So, Bill, I picked you up this velvet pipe and cigarette tobacco to keep your tobacco. [00:02:40] Speaker A: Whoa. [00:02:41] Speaker C: For your corn cob pipe. [00:02:43] Speaker A: Whoa. [00:02:43] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:02:43] Speaker B: Is there tobacco in it? [00:02:45] Speaker C: No, there's no. It's just a holder. [00:02:46] Speaker B: That's good. I'll put my willies in it. [00:02:48] Speaker C: That's what I was thinking originally was the Willys, and then I thought, oh, but he also has that corn cob pipe, so. [00:02:53] Speaker B: Yes, I'm gonna bring that to the Ozarks on Friday. [00:02:56] Speaker A: Yes. [00:02:56] Speaker B: Keep my. My pipe smoke in here. Now, this is rusted out. Yeah. [00:03:00] Speaker C: You might want to clean it a little bit. [00:03:01] Speaker B: I don't think you'd want to put anything in it. [00:03:02] Speaker C: I don't know. I think once you clean it. [00:03:05] Speaker B: Could I put my willies in there? [00:03:07] Speaker C: I thought that might be remnants of old tobacco. I didn't know if you might want to smoke it. [00:03:12] Speaker B: Either way, it's a beautiful little tin. [00:03:15] Speaker C: Yeah, I thought it was nice. It spoke to me. It said, this is for Bill. [00:03:18] Speaker B: Remember last year? It was last year this time that I went down to the Ozarks and I bought that used pipe. [00:03:23] Speaker A: You have to put an elastic band [00:03:24] Speaker B: around it to keep it from opening, but in its rusted condition. Can I put tobacco or whatever in here? [00:03:30] Speaker C: I think so. [00:03:31] Speaker A: Well, here's what I would do if I was you. If you. That the only rust is right in the bottom. [00:03:35] Speaker B: Right, right, right, right. [00:03:37] Speaker C: Just stuff a little newspaper. [00:03:39] Speaker A: Yeah. Melt a load of wax into it or something. [00:03:41] Speaker C: Oh, wax is even better. [00:03:42] Speaker B: Where am I gonna get wax? [00:03:43] Speaker C: Candle. [00:03:44] Speaker B: Candle wax. [00:03:45] Speaker C: Yep. [00:03:45] Speaker A: Just light a candle and then hold it. Wax. [00:03:48] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:03:48] Speaker B: Let it drip down to the bottom. [00:03:49] Speaker C: Yep. [00:03:50] Speaker B: What about the sides on this? Mega. [00:03:52] Speaker C: Sides are golden. [00:03:52] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:03:53] Speaker C: Sides held up over time. [00:03:54] Speaker B: Sweet ass. [00:03:55] Speaker C: Isn't that nice? [00:03:56] Speaker B: Thank you. [00:03:57] Speaker C: You're very welcome. Thank you for the Seinfeld DVDs. [00:04:00] Speaker B: And once again, Alex Cormos telling us not to get do gifts. [00:04:04] Speaker C: Yeah, yeah, I know you're listening. That guy really ticked me off when [00:04:08] Speaker B: I told you off last week and you didn't say anything. Well, I'm telling you again, we're doing gifts. [00:04:12] Speaker C: Speaking of which, did you give him my phone number? He texted me. [00:04:16] Speaker B: Maybe. [00:04:17] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:04:17] Speaker B: What do you say? [00:04:18] Speaker C: He texted me. He was pissed that I'm not doing my job over here. He was saying, you're not doing your job. You're not holding up your end. And I said, what are you talking about? Who is this? He said, this is a drunk guy from the party. I said, what do you want, Alex? [00:04:30] Speaker B: Wow. [00:04:31] Speaker C: He said, listen, you keep allowing too much noise on the mic. He thinks that every time you belch, I should mute you for a minute, [00:04:37] Speaker B: but you don't know when it's coming. [00:04:39] Speaker C: I don't know when it's coming, but he wants me to mute you. Mute. Mute you for a minute afterwards. And then if you belch twice to continue to. Two minutes and onward. [00:04:49] Speaker A: That's good. Yeah. I mean, you're a hockey fan. 2 minute scalable [00:04:55] Speaker C: in the penalty box for two belches. [00:04:58] Speaker A: What if I say something outrageously? [00:05:00] Speaker C: He had nothing to say about you. Yeah, he just. He said. He said, yeah. [00:05:04] Speaker A: He said, well, that's your. [00:05:05] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:05:05] Speaker B: He said, no. [00:05:06] Speaker C: His only qualms were with Bill and his. In his belching. I said, leave Bill alone, man. First of all, you don't know what it's like. It gets belchy in that room. But he wouldn't have it. He was pit. He was so upset with me. [00:05:21] Speaker B: I'm trying to conjure up a belch, but I can't. I can't even get command. [00:05:25] Speaker C: Next time, give him my fake phone number. Give him the phone number I have for I have a Fun Life calm. [00:05:29] Speaker B: You got a private number for that? [00:05:31] Speaker C: Yeah, 1-800-I have a fun Life Calm. [00:05:34] Speaker B: All right, this last call on these lollipops, I'm taking them home. [00:05:37] Speaker C: He also asked me when you eat lollipops, but I told him that's too much. Alex, come on. [00:05:43] Speaker A: Everything's gone now. Well, we finishing gifts? [00:05:47] Speaker B: We're doing gifts. Okay. [00:05:48] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:05:50] Speaker B: Well, I have a gift for you, too. But I. Yeah, it was just. He was talking about Seinfeld, so I felt like I had to launch right into that. [00:05:55] Speaker C: It was a good segue. [00:05:56] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:05:56] Speaker C: Seinfeld segue this. [00:05:58] Speaker A: I was somewhat disappointed. I thought it was a prank movie. [00:06:03] Speaker C: Is that an adult film? [00:06:04] Speaker A: No, it's called Pauly Shaw is Dead. [00:06:07] Speaker C: It's an adult film, and I. [00:06:10] Speaker A: No, I welcome them for people of a pure aisle disposition, probably. But what it. I thought when I initially read it was that he'd pranked a whole bunch of celebs who were told Paulie Shaw is dead, and then they taped their reaction like, I'm glad that twats. [00:06:28] Speaker B: Oh, is that what it is? [00:06:30] Speaker A: No, it isn't. On. On further reading on Wikipedia. It's like a whole movie about him doing stuff. And I thought, well, you know, you're a nihilist. You love the whole, like pranking people on camera of filming them without their. Without their permission, blah, blah, blah. But it seems like it's an attempt at a mockumentary by Mr. Shaw. [00:06:54] Speaker B: Oh, this is. Oh, he's got a lot of names in this. [00:06:57] Speaker C: The third time Pauly Shore has come up in conversation this week. Did something just happen with Pauly Shore? [00:07:01] Speaker A: No. I'm just thinking eventually he's gonna pull him out of the shite gun and have to do one of his. [00:07:06] Speaker C: One of life's funny coincidences. [00:07:08] Speaker A: What was the name of his special [00:07:11] Speaker C: Polish or is alive the Weasel or something? [00:07:14] Speaker B: He had his own stand up special. [00:07:16] Speaker A: Oh, yeah, his mom owned. [00:07:19] Speaker B: I know that, but I remember. I don't remember a special of his, [00:07:21] Speaker A: but he must have done. [00:07:23] Speaker B: Yeah, there's so many in the shite canon that they're still yet to come. Polly Shore, Carrot Top. [00:07:29] Speaker A: Yeah, well, have some respect. [00:07:32] Speaker B: Well, you know, he's not. He's not. [00:07:33] Speaker A: Well, he almost carrot topped himself. [00:07:36] Speaker B: That's poor taste right there. That's. [00:07:39] Speaker A: You brought him up. [00:07:39] Speaker B: I didn't say anything like that. [00:07:41] Speaker C: Yeah, it's your fault. [00:07:42] Speaker B: I like that. Thank you. Yeah, you're. You know, I'm running out of room for all these DVDs and videotape. [00:07:50] Speaker A: You just watch them and then take them to the thrift store. [00:07:53] Speaker B: Yeah, it'd be good if the thrift had an exchange. I've got a bone to pick with a thrift? That's Seinfeld. I thought I was gonna get a deal. Right. And just pay for one dvd. They charged me for each individual dvd. [00:08:04] Speaker C: No. [00:08:04] Speaker B: Yeah. And I was like, come on. Probably not even in there. [00:08:08] Speaker A: Did you check them for intense scratching? You have to do that at the Thrifties? [00:08:12] Speaker B: No, I know I shouldn't. All right, here's your gift. You ready? Let me fish around in the back for it. It's. It's a random VHS tape that may have snuffer porn on. Says there's some kind of old movie on there. [00:08:30] Speaker A: But Mrs. Miniver, that's a classic Ealing comedy of. No, it's not. [00:08:35] Speaker B: That's English. [00:08:36] Speaker A: Oh, yeah, yeah, for sure. [00:08:37] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:08:38] Speaker A: The 206, the 806 and I. I don't know. [00:08:43] Speaker B: Could be snuff, could be porn. I know you're always looking for those two things. Snuff and porn. [00:08:48] Speaker A: Mrs. Minima. 9. Mrs. Miniver, 1942, starring Greer Garson. [00:08:55] Speaker B: The Philadelphia Stories on there, I believe. Isn't it? [00:08:59] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:09:00] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:09:00] Speaker A: Wow. Someone. [00:09:01] Speaker B: But it could be anything. [00:09:02] Speaker A: Old things. The. Oh, it's the Agony. I thought you said the 806 and I. The Agony, starring Claudette Colbert and Clark Gable. [00:09:13] Speaker B: Some old timey films on that. [00:09:14] Speaker A: I'm trying to get into old time films because Tubi has a million of them, but it's just so hard. Like. Yeah. Do I do it? [00:09:20] Speaker C: No. [00:09:21] Speaker B: Get Turner Classic Movies. [00:09:23] Speaker A: Nice. [00:09:24] Speaker B: It's a channel and it just runs all day and you just turn it on. You just catch it in the middle. It's good. [00:09:28] Speaker A: You don't even need it, though. To be. Got everything now. [00:09:31] Speaker B: To be. I don't understand. To be. And I was looking at Mubi. Mu B I. That's another one. But that's a pay. That's the pay. That's like high end cinema now. [00:09:41] Speaker A: To be as a $3 a month flavor of it. [00:09:45] Speaker B: Oh, they do. It's $3 a month for to be. [00:09:47] Speaker A: No, no. To be free. And then there's another one that to be just launched. I can't remember what it's called, but it's like $3 a month. And it's like, this is where we keep the goods. [00:09:57] Speaker C: It's called To Buy. [00:09:58] Speaker B: To Buy? [00:09:59] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:09:59] Speaker B: Like. [00:10:00] Speaker C: Yeah, just like Dubai. [00:10:01] Speaker B: Where do you think all this is headed? Right. Where are we headed with all these different apps and streaming platforms and the disintegration. [00:10:08] Speaker C: We pay for television. Anything we want, it's just gonna stay a la carte. Yeah. Anything that was free that we like, we pay for it now. [00:10:15] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:10:16] Speaker A: Is it a good thing? No, I've. Every movie ever made at your fingertips. [00:10:20] Speaker B: No, can't get every movie. I was trying to get Basketball Diaries dialed up. You know that film with Leonardo DiCaprio, Drug Addled Youth. No rights and nobody has the rights anywhere. [00:10:33] Speaker A: Do you know who wrote that? [00:10:37] Speaker B: Jim Carroll. [00:10:38] Speaker A: The people who died. Those are people who died. [00:10:42] Speaker B: Oh, yeah, that's him. [00:10:43] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:10:44] Speaker B: He's one of them that died. [00:10:46] Speaker A: He did. [00:10:47] Speaker B: He's. He's dead. Jim Carroll. [00:10:50] Speaker A: I was really into that song for a minute. Like, it just. I'd never heard it my whole life and it come up. I was like, wow, this is good one. [00:10:58] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:10:59] Speaker C: Are you familiar, Bill? [00:11:01] Speaker B: Yes, I'm familiar. What's with you over there? You get some kind of twinkle in your eye like you had. [00:11:06] Speaker C: I'm in a good mood. [00:11:07] Speaker B: Like, you're on the sweet leaf over there kicking in. Think something's kicking in now. Most people in America are on marijuana, right? [00:11:15] Speaker C: Would you say it all on marijuana? [00:11:17] Speaker B: They've been the. The average person you run into in the street is on marijuana, like actively [00:11:22] Speaker C: at the time or. Or they just enjoy it. [00:11:24] Speaker A: America is drug addled. [00:11:26] Speaker B: It's drug addled. [00:11:27] Speaker C: It's just America. Just America. [00:11:30] Speaker B: I'm starting to think that people are on psychedelics at all times now. With the advent of psychedelics becoming more mainstream and acceptable and therapeutic. I think a lot of people are walking around on. [00:11:42] Speaker C: There certainly are a lot more people taking mushrooms now than ever did. [00:11:44] Speaker B: Mushrooms are like. [00:11:46] Speaker C: And they're not even Skittles. Yeah. And the thing is, people keep eating these synthetic mushrooms that are. I don't know, it's a slippery slope. [00:11:52] Speaker B: Tough go sideways. [00:11:54] Speaker C: I don't know what you're getting there. Yeah. [00:11:56] Speaker B: Synthetic mushrooms. Right. [00:11:57] Speaker C: Who knows what chemical you're putting into your brain. [00:11:59] Speaker A: Why do Americans have this need to be just whacked so much of the time? [00:12:03] Speaker C: They don't. [00:12:04] Speaker B: Why can't they just take life on [00:12:05] Speaker C: a country and say this entire. You know, how many people, you know how big this country is, you can't just say, americans like to do this thing and that and then. And ask why they like to do it. And then that's just the case. [00:12:15] Speaker B: Trump America. Trump's America. They just take it on the chin. White beard. [00:12:19] Speaker A: But they're all a meth. [00:12:21] Speaker B: Some, I'd say most of middle America not. I'm talking about middle America and middle class America is just taking it on the chin with a little booze. Now, the lower echelons of society, they're on meth. The liberal bubble that we exist in here, Mushrooms, psychedelics, marijuana, Malort. [00:12:46] Speaker A: What about like all the women out there on Mother's Little Helper? [00:12:50] Speaker B: What's that? [00:12:51] Speaker C: It's an old Rolling Stone song. [00:12:55] Speaker B: Is that heron? [00:12:56] Speaker A: No, heroin. [00:12:57] Speaker B: Heroin. Heroin. [00:12:59] Speaker A: Heroin. [00:12:59] Speaker B: Heron. [00:13:00] Speaker C: It's a. Yeah, that's how some people say it's the opposite of hero on. [00:13:04] Speaker B: Now, high school kids today, they're all on coke. [00:13:08] Speaker C: They're back to coke. They were on heroin for a long [00:13:10] Speaker B: time from their parents. [00:13:12] Speaker A: I thought Pepsi was the choice for a new generation [00:13:16] Speaker B: anymore. [00:13:17] Speaker C: Coke. [00:13:18] Speaker A: It might. My mate's daughter said to him, oh, you know, you need a little coke to start the night. [00:13:26] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:13:27] Speaker A: I said, we never did that. Coke. Youth. [00:13:31] Speaker B: No, I know coke. [00:13:32] Speaker C: I thought coke went away. I thought they were done with it back. Jesus Christ. [00:13:35] Speaker B: Ketamine obviously is back. You. [00:13:37] Speaker C: It's got to be terrible. [00:13:38] Speaker B: Ketamine was never. [00:13:39] Speaker C: No, I don't mean the ketamine, like ketamine also. I know that was big for a while and I'm sure that's still big now. [00:13:44] Speaker B: That's what they gave that girl in the Cornell rape case. [00:13:48] Speaker C: Yeah, yeah. People, they're going down. K holes. [00:13:52] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:13:52] Speaker C: Coke's got to be terrible. It's blended with all this. Who knows? [00:13:56] Speaker B: Who knows? [00:13:57] Speaker C: Because don't they put ketamine in coke? [00:13:59] Speaker B: I don't know. What are you asking me for? I'm straight edge. I have a little Willy's cbd, hemp cigarette. That's about it. [00:14:05] Speaker C: You had a bunch of other effects, so I thought maybe you have that one, too. [00:14:08] Speaker B: Now, I don't know where things stand with heroin. Heroin. [00:14:11] Speaker C: Heroin, Heroin. [00:14:12] Speaker B: But, you know, we know there's an opioid. [00:14:15] Speaker A: Is that how you say it in. In Southie? [00:14:18] Speaker B: Heroin? [00:14:19] Speaker A: Hey, now, how do you say it in Southie? [00:14:22] Speaker B: I don't know. I'm not from Southie. You are from Manchester by the Sea. [00:14:26] Speaker A: You're a Southie. [00:14:28] Speaker B: No, no, I'm not. [00:14:32] Speaker A: You've kept it tamped down for a couple of series. This is series [00:14:39] Speaker B: got re upped for another season. [00:14:40] Speaker C: Four, isn't it? [00:14:41] Speaker B: The Lincoln Lodge re upped us. [00:14:44] Speaker A: One was really long. Two is. No, I think it's three. [00:14:48] Speaker C: Is it three? [00:14:48] Speaker A: Third series. Can I finish my gifts? [00:14:51] Speaker B: Yeah, go ahead. [00:14:52] Speaker A: Talking of heroin, your heroin is hot dogs, as we all know. [00:14:55] Speaker B: Yeah, he gets really good gifts. [00:14:57] Speaker C: Yeah, I do. [00:14:58] Speaker A: Now, this is actually. I'm just. I'm pulling random. [00:15:00] Speaker B: Let me see that. What is that? Hot dog holder. [00:15:03] Speaker A: Yeah, From Santa's Village, Dundee, Illinois. [00:15:07] Speaker C: It's got a little area. Oh, this is for a relish spoon. Or is this for. [00:15:11] Speaker A: No, I think that's where you put the actual. [00:15:13] Speaker C: You put the actual relish in there and then you put the actual mustard when you dip the hot dog in. [00:15:17] Speaker A: Yeah, I don't know. That seems weird. [00:15:19] Speaker C: I think it's meant to hold the spoons that you use to put the relish and the mustard. [00:15:24] Speaker A: Small spoon. [00:15:25] Speaker B: Yeah, relish in the dog's ears there. Because how would you get it out with your finger? [00:15:29] Speaker C: Q tip. [00:15:30] Speaker B: It's cute, though. [00:15:31] Speaker C: It is. [00:15:32] Speaker A: Well, I'm really. I'm just going into the basement now and pulling. [00:15:35] Speaker B: You're getting into the. Yeah. [00:15:36] Speaker C: Well, I'll give you something to put back in the basement. [00:15:39] Speaker B: Oh, okay. [00:15:40] Speaker C: Also from the. From the gift Coming Elizabeth Antique store. I have a. An S shaped wrench. This is for all those hard to reach places that you need to either tighten or loosen a large nut. [00:15:58] Speaker B: That would have been helpful in the oven. [00:16:00] Speaker C: You can use this S shaped wrench. [00:16:02] Speaker B: You have one of those. [00:16:03] Speaker C: For such jobs you need big nuts [00:16:06] Speaker A: for that, Mrs. Ah, you got one of them wrenches. [00:16:09] Speaker C: 1876. [00:16:10] Speaker A: I tell you what, that's cool. [00:16:11] Speaker B: That should be on a wall. [00:16:12] Speaker A: Yeah, Hit some effort with that. [00:16:14] Speaker C: That's what I was thinking. [00:16:15] Speaker A: Up in a hurry. That's a kosh. [00:16:18] Speaker C: Yeah. I can't toss this to you because it's an antique. [00:16:22] Speaker B: Break something. [00:16:22] Speaker A: That's a Kosh, not a bloody. [00:16:24] Speaker B: What's a Kosh? British talk time. What's the Kosh? [00:16:27] Speaker C: A Kosh is what you used to bonk somebody. [00:16:31] Speaker B: Oh, cock. [00:16:32] Speaker C: What the. That's what the cops carry around over there. [00:16:34] Speaker A: That's a trunch. [00:16:35] Speaker B: That's a billy club. [00:16:36] Speaker C: They carry a trunchel. And if they don't have their trunch or they have a kosh in their sock, like cops here with the guns. [00:16:43] Speaker A: Have you ever seen the movie Scum? [00:16:46] Speaker B: No, I have not. Is it porn? [00:16:47] Speaker A: As Ray Winston's first movie outing and he gets sent to Boston and when he goes, I don't. I feel like. Stop me if you heard this one before. [00:16:59] Speaker C: This is new. [00:17:00] Speaker A: He goes to Borstal, which is a reform school in England. Obviously brutal and kind of counterproductive. And when he gets there, this the. The hardest lad in the place. Says to him, I'm the daddy. You. You obey me. I rule this place. I'm the daddy. So Ray Winston is really. Walks off, goes to the pool table, takes his sock off, puts like three pool balls in, walks back and just twats him around the head and just looks down at him and goes, now I'm the daddy. And that's like a famous, like quote. [00:17:37] Speaker B: Now there's a similar scene to that. What year was this movie? [00:17:42] Speaker A: Well, America. There's an American version. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. [00:17:48] Speaker B: And east side Morales. [00:17:49] Speaker A: Yeah, that was the Yank knockoff of it. Yeah, yeah. [00:17:54] Speaker B: So remind me of it. [00:17:55] Speaker A: Must. Must be one of them shot for shot remakes. [00:17:58] Speaker B: I don't know about that, but why [00:18:00] Speaker A: don't they just call it Scum again? Yank scum. Bad Boys makes it. Hang on. I thought Will Smith was Bad Boys. [00:18:14] Speaker C: Yeah, Will Smith was Bad Boys. [00:18:19] Speaker A: How could he? Can't have a film, two films, same name. [00:18:22] Speaker C: Sure. Bad Boys 1 and Bad Boys 2. [00:18:27] Speaker B: You muted me. [00:18:29] Speaker C: Just doing what Alex wanted. [00:18:30] Speaker B: No, Yeah, I hear. No, I appreciate it. Keep me. Keep me clean over here. But there's just two different films. Bad Boys is now, I know, a remake of Scum. The other Bad Boys is a cop movie. [00:18:42] Speaker A: But you can't call two films the same name, but in American copyright. [00:18:47] Speaker C: Sure. [00:18:47] Speaker B: There's other examples. [00:18:48] Speaker C: Yeah, like Dumb and Dumber and Dumb and Dumber. [00:18:53] Speaker A: The only other one I know is there was a Russ Mayer movie called up and then there was the Disney thing called up. [00:19:02] Speaker C: Sometimes when I look up movies on my illegal fire stick, they'll be two of the same name, different countries. [00:19:07] Speaker B: Yeah, no, there's a lot of examples. I can't think of them right now, but that Bad Boys with Sean Penn. Esai Morales also has a young Clancy Brown in it. And you might know Clancy Brown from the voice of Mr. Krabs and SpongeBob SquarePants from SpongeBob. Clancy Brown, that's right. He was also in the Shawshank, I believe. [00:19:27] Speaker C: Who did he play in the Shawshank? [00:19:28] Speaker B: He played a guard. Oh, with one of the guards. [00:19:31] Speaker A: Can you get British stuff on your illegal fire stick? [00:19:34] Speaker C: I'm sure I can. [00:19:35] Speaker B: Bloody, bloody, bloody, bloody. [00:19:38] Speaker A: Can you get it on your illegal fire stick and download it so that we could watch it? [00:19:43] Speaker C: Maybe. I know there is a download option. I just have to put on a flash, like what I want to get. [00:19:48] Speaker A: There's a bunch of, like, British comedy specials by people I want to see, but I can't find them anywhere. So one's called Lads, Lads, Lads by Sarah Pascoe. [00:19:59] Speaker C: You were pretty close with that. [00:20:00] Speaker B: Bloody, Bloody, Bloody, bloody, bloody, bloody. We need a drop for that. Like when he starts talking. You just said the drop. Like, bloody, bloody, bloody. [00:20:07] Speaker C: We've got it on demand. [00:20:08] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:20:10] Speaker C: You don't have AI taking our jobs. No, he doesn't seem to like it at all. [00:20:15] Speaker B: Hey, there was a guy at basketball this morning, Big Pat. Do you guys know Big Pat? [00:20:20] Speaker C: Who doesn't know Big Pat? [00:20:21] Speaker B: Yeah, you know Big Pat. He was listening to an episode and he likes. He came. I think he's doing it to aggravate me because he knows I don't want to hear any comments about you. He said, hey, that. That Mark's so funny when he says, you know, stuff about your ex wife. I was like, yeah, he knows. It gets pisses me off. And now he's pissing me off by saying how funny you are. Everybody loves Mark. All the feedback. Although there was some mailbag here that is not as complimentary about Mark. Let me. Let me dig in and find it. Here is the smug thing coming up. No, no, no, no, no. I haven't heard that in a while. But this one, this is Cheeto. I don't know. That's his handle. Cheeto. Cheeto says the hypocrisy of Mark commenting on open micrs hygiene. [00:21:15] Speaker C: What is that supposed to mean? This guy, this guy. Do you know a Cheeto in regular Cheeto? [00:21:20] Speaker B: So last week have you let him smell you episodes. You were really going in on these open micros and what slovenly slobs they are. But apparently this guy knows you or seen you or met you Cheeto and he says how dare you criticize, you know, the slovenliness of somebody else. [00:21:38] Speaker C: He said, you sure it isn't Tito Said Cheetah. [00:21:42] Speaker A: No. I tell people all, all the time, don't come near me. I really stink today. That's not hypocrisy. [00:21:49] Speaker B: But you're saying comedians should be cleaned up. But you're allowed to be look like you know. [00:21:54] Speaker C: Yeah, he's not on stage. [00:21:55] Speaker A: I'm the one fixing a toilet. I'm allowed. [00:21:58] Speaker C: He's under the stage. [00:22:00] Speaker B: Right? [00:22:00] Speaker A: Exactly. [00:22:01] Speaker B: Fair. [00:22:01] Speaker A: They are on the stage. They better be presentable. Fair. [00:22:06] Speaker C: Yeah. So tell it's Cheetah. [00:22:08] Speaker B: So if you were to go on stage, we'd have cuffs on and a whole zoot suit. [00:22:12] Speaker A: You know, I used to dress up when I went. [00:22:14] Speaker B: You didn't. [00:22:15] Speaker A: Yes, I did. [00:22:16] Speaker C: What did he wear when you went up? [00:22:18] Speaker A: When I went up I wore like party shirts and stuff. [00:22:21] Speaker B: Like bowling shirts. Yeah, yeah you did. That's true. [00:22:25] Speaker A: Oh, I should give you two those bowling shirts you got. [00:22:28] Speaker B: Bowling shirts. Hey, can we do a boy? How about this? I've been wanting to do a bowling. [00:22:32] Speaker C: Bowling league. [00:22:33] Speaker B: Yeah, join a league and it'll be us three and then whoever else from [00:22:37] Speaker C: the lodge over at the Versa Bowl. [00:22:39] Speaker B: What's going on? With what? Yeah, diversity of course only or Timberlands is pretty good. What's going on? [00:22:44] Speaker A: If I can use those ramps that the kids use, I could. [00:22:47] Speaker C: The bumper bowling. [00:22:49] Speaker A: I don't need the bumpers, I just need the. The launch ramp. [00:22:52] Speaker B: Now you walked into this studio today, you're telling me you couldn't stand at the end of a bowling lane and roll a ball down it with your knee and condition it's in. [00:23:01] Speaker A: If I went down and then came up suddenly, I might tear them. [00:23:05] Speaker C: What if he launched just some way like a, like a curler launches, you know when they get like going and they release, then I know the first one wasn't really worthy of it, but it gave me a reason to time out. [00:23:23] Speaker A: Shut up. There's no point in talking. [00:23:25] Speaker C: Release it like a curler. Where you go, you will give you a pair of rollerblades and you just scoot along the Floor and you hold the ball and you just release it. All right. [00:23:37] Speaker A: Skateboard. [00:23:38] Speaker C: Yeah, skateboards. Even better. You just kneel on a skateboard. [00:23:40] Speaker A: He's the man in the box. Yeah. Sound like a man in the box. [00:23:50] Speaker B: Put my mic on. [00:23:53] Speaker C: Are you gonna be good? [00:23:54] Speaker B: Yep. No, I want to do a bowling at bowling league. But you couldn't even do that. [00:24:00] Speaker A: No, I told you, get me the ramp that the kids launch it off. [00:24:04] Speaker B: You can't bend over. [00:24:06] Speaker A: I can bend, but when I come back up, who knows? [00:24:09] Speaker B: You don't need to come like Bigger and McCracken and throwing the leg out and everything. You just gotta roll it between your legs. [00:24:15] Speaker A: You have to do the cracking. [00:24:17] Speaker C: Yeah, you gotta put your leg. [00:24:19] Speaker B: I mean, it looks nice, but you don't have to. [00:24:20] Speaker C: Yeah, it looks cool. Otherwise, what are you doing there? Yeah, why are you even at diversity Bowl? Unless you want to look cool. [00:24:26] Speaker A: I don't want to be one of those annoying drunk girls at the bowling alley that just walks up and goes, ah. And then just. [00:24:31] Speaker B: Yeah, why not? [00:24:32] Speaker A: Tosses it out like a bucket of slop. [00:24:37] Speaker B: I don't know why not. You're not like, you know, upholding some idea we have of you, this, you know, supreme. [00:24:47] Speaker C: Jack the Lad. [00:24:47] Speaker B: Jack the Lad. [00:24:49] Speaker A: Listen, if I'm. If I'm being. If I'm in a competition, I want to win. [00:24:54] Speaker B: Well, I remember you being on sars. You didn't look like you were trying to win then. [00:24:58] Speaker A: Yeah, I didn't even know the rules. [00:24:59] Speaker B: Oh, okay. [00:25:00] Speaker A: No one had practiced. No one had. Tell me the rules. [00:25:03] Speaker B: All right. [00:25:04] Speaker A: The umpire used to tell me what to do. [00:25:06] Speaker B: Really? [00:25:07] Speaker A: We've been through this. [00:25:08] Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah. [00:25:10] Speaker C: What kind of league is that? [00:25:11] Speaker B: It was softball. [00:25:11] Speaker A: Oh. But it was one of those dumb ass. [00:25:14] Speaker C: The Giant ones. [00:25:15] Speaker B: He never came out for your league. [00:25:16] Speaker C: He came out and watched once. [00:25:18] Speaker A: Yeah, I watched. [00:25:20] Speaker C: Take him out. Take the. Impressive. We were so impressed that he couldn't stand more. He said, that's enough. That's all I can handle for one season. [00:25:27] Speaker B: Take the team out for pizza after or something. Were you sponsored by a bar or this place? [00:25:31] Speaker C: No, this place covered our fees. [00:25:34] Speaker B: That was good. [00:25:34] Speaker C: Yeah. So we. [00:25:35] Speaker B: You can come back here after and [00:25:36] Speaker A: eat crisps and I got all the bats and. [00:25:39] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:25:40] Speaker B: For all that thrift. Flea. [00:25:43] Speaker A: Flea. [00:25:43] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:25:43] Speaker C: We did go out after most games. Yeah, sometimes not some people. [00:25:47] Speaker B: It was a month and I'm not a candidate for that team. [00:25:50] Speaker C: Why? [00:25:51] Speaker B: I'm asking. [00:25:51] Speaker C: It's too late. [00:25:52] Speaker B: I know, but I was not invited because. Why? You don't like Me. [00:25:56] Speaker A: Or it's because you weren't available at 9:00'. Clock. [00:25:59] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:26:00] Speaker C: He said no. [00:26:01] Speaker B: I did. [00:26:01] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:26:02] Speaker B: I don't remember being invited. [00:26:03] Speaker C: I do. [00:26:04] Speaker B: Wow. [00:26:06] Speaker A: I haven't recorded Chicago Social. [00:26:08] Speaker B: Sure. [00:26:09] Speaker C: Bowling leagues. I'm sure that. Yeah. Some. Somebody does a bowling league. [00:26:12] Speaker B: Yeah. And you get shirts with our names on them. We get some. We. Here's the name of our team. You ready? The Finger Blasters. Get it? [00:26:22] Speaker A: The Cottages. [00:26:24] Speaker B: The Cottages. All right. You could pick the name. [00:26:27] Speaker A: I. We did the design I sent you. [00:26:29] Speaker C: There's a softball team. Yeah. [00:26:31] Speaker B: Oh, dude. They were called the Cottages. [00:26:33] Speaker C: The softball team, yeah. [00:26:34] Speaker B: Did you make the shirts and everything? [00:26:36] Speaker A: Nah. [00:26:36] Speaker B: Why not? [00:26:37] Speaker C: They gave us shirts, and I. I put Lincoln Lodge logos on the back of some of them, but I offered it to everybody. I said, if you want me to do it, bring your shirt in. I'll do it. [00:26:45] Speaker B: And the Abe Lincoln face on it. [00:26:47] Speaker C: Yeah. A few people took me up on it. [00:26:49] Speaker B: That's a good look. [00:26:50] Speaker C: It is. Yeah. I was. I thought I lost my shirt at the end of the season. I couldn't find it for the last game, and I was pretty upset about it. You know, I cut the sleeves off just right and all that I found it was wedged between my bed and the wall. [00:27:02] Speaker B: Wow. But you're relieved to have found that. [00:27:05] Speaker C: I was. I really was. [00:27:06] Speaker B: It's a collector's item. [00:27:06] Speaker C: I found that because what I does. I had folded that shirt and some others after doing laundry and folding them on the bed, and somehow they fell behind. And that shirt, along with two others that I was missing that were notable shirts of mine that I noticed were missing, they were gone for months. [00:27:20] Speaker B: Sounds like Alberto sniffing around the laundry pile. [00:27:23] Speaker C: I wonder sometimes. [00:27:25] Speaker B: Hey, I was at the bar. Christian was. [00:27:28] Speaker C: Which bar? [00:27:29] Speaker B: Your bar. Oh, yeah, the bar here. And filling up my water. And I saw these nice stickers that you guys have now. They're new this week. Did you make these Lincoln Lodge stickers? [00:27:38] Speaker A: Nah, Kelsey made them. [00:27:39] Speaker B: Oh, they got the podcast sticker. [00:27:41] Speaker A: I'm not a big sticker guy. [00:27:43] Speaker B: I love stickers. [00:27:44] Speaker A: So I'm not 12 years old anymore. [00:27:46] Speaker B: Well, I don't have a sticker book, but I like stickers. This one's nice, the Lincoln Lodge one, But this one's about the podcast. It's live from the Lincoln Lodge podcast network, LincolnLodge.com podcast. And I thought maybe we could have our own sticker with the sloth. You know, start throwing that around. [00:28:02] Speaker A: Go for it. [00:28:02] Speaker B: Well, you gotta send me the. I'll make them. But you Gotta send me the logo, you know, whatever. Our logo. Why are you looking at me like, [00:28:11] Speaker A: all right, I'll send you the logo. [00:28:13] Speaker B: Send me the logo and I'll make stickers. [00:28:15] Speaker A: What's with you? [00:28:16] Speaker C: He's suspicious. [00:28:17] Speaker B: I hate the sloth. But I like a sticker, you know, when I advertise the program. [00:28:21] Speaker C: What's the tension in the air here about? I don't know what's going on over here? [00:28:24] Speaker B: I don't know. I feel like everybody's mad at me these days. I don't know what I did. [00:28:28] Speaker C: Quit pissing people off. [00:28:29] Speaker A: I guess I am nihilism. [00:28:32] Speaker B: So listen, I. I have a theory about your knee. Since you're talking about it. I think it's tension, right? Like you got this job on the horizon. Did you have the job interview? [00:28:45] Speaker A: Nah, I sort of gone cold again. [00:28:47] Speaker B: But you had an interview. [00:28:49] Speaker A: Yeah, I've had several interviews, but just. It's just a ball, like getting a job. [00:28:54] Speaker B: I thought the AB sure is a fallache. [00:28:56] Speaker A: I thought, I thought the obvi. The obvious option was gonna just be a slam dunk. I was cocky, to be honest. It's cocky. Not just smug. Cocky as well this time. And I thought. And I just took my foot off the gas. [00:29:16] Speaker B: You went in there, you know. No, no, not with the high stepping, [00:29:19] Speaker A: not with the interview. Just I thought, well, you know, they'll just come knocking and it'll be. [00:29:23] Speaker B: And they didn't. [00:29:23] Speaker C: He just walked right in and sat at a desk. [00:29:25] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:29:26] Speaker B: Maybe they're tired of your itinerant ways, you know, they don't want you coming and going as you please. [00:29:31] Speaker A: I think age is a factor. [00:29:32] Speaker B: Oh, you think you're being discriminated against based on your age? [00:29:36] Speaker A: Yeah, they know. They know I'm looking to check out of the game. [00:29:40] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:29:40] Speaker B: Like how much do you know about AI? You don't. [00:29:43] Speaker A: You know, I mean it's all AI. If I know plenty about pharma, it. And that's a skill. Yeah. I don't know. You know what part of it is, is I'm booking for a contract rather than becoming an employee. Right, and you won't get contracts now until the new year because they blow the budget up front. [00:30:05] Speaker B: Oh, so you have to wait till January 1st? [00:30:07] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:30:07] Speaker B: Okay, maybe they don't need you guys because you've been replaced by AI. [00:30:13] Speaker A: No, I mean AI would certainly be a huge factor in business at systems analyst role, but it ain't going to get rid of it. [00:30:24] Speaker B: Well, we like having you here, don't we, Christian? We don't want them. [00:30:28] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:30:28] Speaker A: My worry is where the youth are going to get jobs. [00:30:31] Speaker B: You're worried about the youth? [00:30:33] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:30:34] Speaker B: Why would you worry about the youth? [00:30:35] Speaker A: Because the youth, the future that you got to get their money, you got to get them jobs. That's what powers the economy. Otherwise the economy grinds to a hole. [00:30:43] Speaker C: Yeah. Maybe they'll start digging ditches. World ditch diggers, too, Right? [00:30:48] Speaker B: Yeah, I heard that somewhere. [00:30:49] Speaker C: Yep. [00:30:50] Speaker B: And if we don't give the youth jobs and money, then they'll turn on us, kill us. Right. [00:30:56] Speaker C: You think so? [00:30:57] Speaker B: Apocalyptic theory, like warriors turn into warriors around here. [00:31:01] Speaker A: Too lazy to do that. I think there's a huge problem. Old people have too much money. [00:31:06] Speaker B: That's. That's what you hear a lot about. [00:31:09] Speaker A: The money is. Is stopped up the old. [00:31:13] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:31:13] Speaker A: With the aged. It needs to be in the hands of the youth because they're going to piss it up the wall, do things with it. Yeah. [00:31:20] Speaker B: Pump it into the economy. [00:31:21] Speaker C: I don't know if they're going to start killing the old people. They can't even lift a shovel to dig a ditch. They can't lift a shovel to hit me on the head with. [00:31:28] Speaker B: Well, that's what he's saying. [00:31:29] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:31:29] Speaker B: Too lazy to give you a beating. [00:31:31] Speaker A: Well, you've got youth. [00:31:33] Speaker B: I've got youth. They take money out of my wallet. I suspect, like, I'll go in my wallet. I'm like, I got a 20 in here. I think. I don't know who it is. There's just too many of them. I can't. They all say they didn't do it. [00:31:43] Speaker C: Did you ever steal money from your parents? [00:31:44] Speaker B: Yes, my mother's wallet. She'd say, you take money out of my wallet? I'd say, no. [00:31:52] Speaker A: What's your mom, Adam Sandler? [00:31:54] Speaker B: Kind of. Yeah. Sounded like that. Sounded just like that. All right. Well, I think a lot of our physical ailments. I'm reading this book by Dr. John Sarno, including my back ailment. It's all tension. It's all stress. Anxiety, fear settles in certain parts of our body and creates chronic pain. There's nothing to your knee problem other than your stress and anxiety and stuff like that. And if you can take care of that, your knee will be fine. What do you think about that theory? [00:32:26] Speaker C: Yeah, I think it's a sound theory. That's why I'm always feeling great. I'm always in a. [00:32:29] Speaker B: Cause you're not stressed. [00:32:30] Speaker C: I'm not stressed. Take it as it comes. It is great. Life is good. [00:32:35] Speaker A: Sounds like Some hippie bullshit to me, but. [00:32:37] Speaker B: Yeah, I don't know. [00:32:40] Speaker A: I mean, I do believe the body and mind is connected, yes, health wise, but I don't believe in burning sage and rubbing crystals on your. No, I know that. [00:32:52] Speaker B: No, that's not what I'm saying here. That's not what Dr. John Sarno is saying. [00:32:55] Speaker C: I thought when you said the whole thing about the sage and the crystals, that's what you were saying. [00:32:59] Speaker B: I didn't say sage. [00:33:00] Speaker C: That's right. You didn't say any of that, did you? [00:33:01] Speaker B: No. What's he talking about? What are you talking about? Listen. [00:33:09] Speaker A: What are you talking about? Willis. You know what? I'm going silent for two minutes, so you better carry this. [00:33:15] Speaker B: What's going on? You got a phone call to make. [00:33:17] Speaker C: Just burp twice. It'll happen for you. [00:33:19] Speaker A: My brain's. Two minutes. [00:33:21] Speaker B: Two minutes. [00:33:21] Speaker C: All right, I think we can. I think we go ahead and get into our comedian of the Week. [00:33:25] Speaker B: Well, hold on. [00:33:27] Speaker C: You got a lot of notes over there. [00:33:28] Speaker B: I do. All right. I guess we could. [00:33:31] Speaker C: Have you tried a gym shoe sandwich? No time since last. [00:33:34] Speaker B: I thought you were bringing them this week. Where? [00:33:35] Speaker C: Yeah, I didn't get down there. [00:33:37] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:33:38] Speaker C: I feel like there's other things to talk about though, too. [00:33:40] Speaker B: Well, it's apropos. You brought Mark that S wrench. [00:33:43] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:33:44] Speaker B: Giant S wrench. Because we're going to talk a lot about tools today. [00:33:48] Speaker C: Yes. [00:33:48] Speaker B: With Tim the Tool man Taylor. [00:33:50] Speaker C: Right. [00:33:51] Speaker B: AKA Timmy Allen. [00:33:54] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:33:55] Speaker B: Mr. Tim Allen. [00:33:56] Speaker C: Timothy Allen Dick is his real name. No. [00:33:59] Speaker B: Is it? All right. Timothy Allen Dick is really his name. [00:34:03] Speaker C: Tim Dick. Yep. And his middle name is a L A N instead of a L. A [00:34:07] Speaker B: L, A N. Yep. And he changed it to Tim Allen with the an E. Yep. That I did not know. This is the truth. You're saying this is. [00:34:15] Speaker C: That's the truth. [00:34:15] Speaker B: All right, tell us everything you know about Tim Allen. [00:34:18] Speaker C: Tim Allen was born in Denver, Colorado, June 13, 1953. He. [00:34:25] Speaker B: You're not looking at any notes when you're saying this. [00:34:27] Speaker C: I don't need to. He moved to just outside of Detroit, Michigan with his mother and one of his siblings when his mother met a man who all who had three daughters. So they did a Brady Bunch sort of arrangement up there and outside of Michigan. Michigan. Tim Allen in 1975 started doing stand up as a dare by one of his friends. He did it for a little while until 1978 when he was arrested. [00:34:58] Speaker A: Can I come back early? [00:35:00] Speaker B: You think he's making this shit up? He's not looking at anything he's saying all these dates and these. [00:35:04] Speaker A: The first place he did comedy was Mark Ridley's comedy Castle. [00:35:08] Speaker B: I knew that at one point should have asked him that. See if he's making this shit up. [00:35:14] Speaker C: Then in 1978, he was arrested in Kalamazoo, Michigan at the airport because coke. He thought he was selling $40,000 worth of cocaine to a drug dealer, but he was in fact selling it to an undercover agent. At the time, Michigan was very much part of the War on Drugs initiative. So if you were caught selling cocaine, you could get life in prison, which he almost did, except for the fact that he gave up the names of some of the other small time coke dealers. [00:35:41] Speaker B: Whoa, he's a rat. [00:35:41] Speaker C: Yep. Reducing his sentence to three to seven years. He got out in 1981 and continued his stand up from there. He. [00:35:51] Speaker B: Wait, how many years did he do in the can? [00:35:52] Speaker C: Three. [00:35:53] Speaker B: He was in the can for three years? [00:35:55] Speaker C: Yep. And while he was there, he knew that he couldn't fight anybody. He's not a. He's not a criminal. He's not a hardened criminal. He used his humor to make people laugh and avoid beatings. That's how he got along with everybody. So he got out and he figured, well, if I could do that, I'm gonna go right back to stand up. He did and did stand up here and there until performing the special that we are reviewing today. [00:36:18] Speaker B: In 1990, this was 1990, men are pigs. [00:36:23] Speaker C: And of course went on from there to do eight seasons of Home Improvement. Etc. The Santa Claus, Voicing Buzz Lightyear and all the other projects that he undertook. [00:36:31] Speaker A: Jingle all the way to me is this was pre to Till. Till Time. [00:36:36] Speaker B: This is pre Home Improvement. [00:36:37] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:36:38] Speaker B: This is what led to Home Improvement. [00:36:40] Speaker C: Yeah. He's forming the character here. [00:36:43] Speaker B: Holy Lord. And for those of you listening, you can't see that Christian just rattled off Tim Allen's biography from the inside of his head. He did not look at any notes during that entire soliloquy. I don't know. I can't verify its accuracy. [00:36:58] Speaker C: Sure. [00:36:59] Speaker B: But sounds right. [00:37:00] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:37:01] Speaker B: Right. If this was Hollywood Squares, I'd say I agree. [00:37:03] Speaker C: Yeah. If you make stuff up and talk fast enough, anything sounds right. [00:37:06] Speaker B: Yeah. Or Byron Allen's. Funny youy Should Ask. They did that on that program as well. Well, I did know something about the coke and him being arrested, but I'd forgotten. But $40,000 worth of coke. $40,000 he tried to sell to an agent. [00:37:23] Speaker C: Yeah. He was already a small town coke dealer around like the college campus. Or whatever's around there. [00:37:29] Speaker B: Did he go to college? [00:37:30] Speaker C: He went to college. That's when he started selling coke to make whatever. [00:37:33] Speaker B: Is there somewhere in Detroit? [00:37:34] Speaker C: Somewhere in Detroit. [00:37:35] Speaker A: I think that's where he met his first wife. [00:37:37] Speaker C: Yep. [00:37:38] Speaker B: The hell do you know that? [00:37:39] Speaker A: I read Wikipedia. [00:37:41] Speaker C: They were separated in 1999 and then divorced in 2003. Then he remarried to an actress. I don't know her name. [00:37:46] Speaker B: They were married in 1999. [00:37:48] Speaker C: No, they were separated in 1999. Oh, divorced, 2003. [00:37:52] Speaker B: Okay. [00:37:54] Speaker C: Yeah, he was selling coke a little bit around Kalamazoo and then he figured, well, I'm gonna go for the big score. And he had been talking to somebody he thought was a cop who was just looking for any sort of. [00:38:03] Speaker B: Somebody didn't think was a cop. [00:38:05] Speaker C: No, right. He didn't think was a cop. And this cop was looking for like any sort of way to bring somebody down. And he talked to Mallon and one of his friends into this exchange where they went to the airport, they put $40,000 worth of cocaine into a locker. They locked it, they handed the key off to who they thought they were selling it to. The guy went, open the bag, open the locker, open the bag. 12 undercover agents collapsed on Tim Allen and he was taken to jail. [00:38:29] Speaker B: He was buying or selling? [00:38:31] Speaker C: He was selling. [00:38:32] Speaker B: And it was coke? [00:38:33] Speaker C: It was coke. [00:38:36] Speaker B: How much. How often have you done coke? Never. Tooted coke? [00:38:41] Speaker A: Nope. [00:38:43] Speaker B: Me neither. So you looked up Tim Allen as well. That's. You don't have to do that. That's. That's seaman's job. [00:38:52] Speaker A: No, I was interested. I knew about the coke bust and I just wanted the context of it compared to this, you know, the timeline compared to this special. So then I just got engrossed. I thought he had. I thought he'd been cancelled for unfashionable right wing views, but the bottom of the Wikipedia said he's not. He does say I'm basically a conservative. But he was like anti the insurrection on six. Yeah, he criticized, you know, he doesn't like. He's not a hard. [00:39:28] Speaker B: He's not like Ted Nugent. [00:39:29] Speaker A: Yeah. He's not just looking to, you know, cozy up to Trump in every way. [00:39:34] Speaker B: So like Kid Rock. [00:39:35] Speaker A: Yeah. Another Detroiter. Yeah, yeah. What is it about Michigan that's got all these wackos? [00:39:43] Speaker C: He says, he says something like, I'm a conservative at heart, but I'm a liberal by personality. Yeah, he does. He did. And he's on record criticizing Trump around that time. He says that's an embarrassment. That's not what I believe in. And it's embarrassing that this is aligned with what I like. [00:40:00] Speaker B: Well, I caught an episode or two of his most recent sitcom. The name escapes me. [00:40:06] Speaker C: Oh, it's shifting gears. [00:40:09] Speaker B: I don't know. [00:40:09] Speaker C: The one with Ray has a daughter. [00:40:11] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:40:12] Speaker C: She's crazy. She's wild. [00:40:13] Speaker B: I don't know. He's married to Nancy Travis. From who? So I married an axe murderer. [00:40:18] Speaker C: Okay. [00:40:19] Speaker B: You know her? [00:40:19] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:40:20] Speaker B: And that's pretty. He plays it pretty right wing in that program. [00:40:24] Speaker C: Last Man Standing. [00:40:25] Speaker B: That's it. [00:40:25] Speaker C: Yep. [00:40:25] Speaker B: That's the one I'm thinking of. Last Man Standing. Real conservative project. 2024. What is it called? [00:40:34] Speaker C: Sitcom. [00:40:35] Speaker B: Yeah. So he's a wing. He's a right winger. But I don't know, he. He's not gonna own that. Insurrection, I guess. Okay. Anything else to know about the great Tim Allen? [00:40:50] Speaker C: The special was shot in Kalamazoo. [00:40:51] Speaker B: That was a Kalamazoo. [00:40:53] Speaker C: Yep. [00:40:53] Speaker A: Yes, at the state. [00:40:56] Speaker B: Can we go back to Mark Ridley's comedy Castle? [00:40:58] Speaker A: Of course. [00:40:59] Speaker B: You're referencing Mark Ridley, the father of Ryan Ridley, Chicago comedy legend and Hollywood screenwriter who wrote the Hollywood screenplay for the film Renfield. You know the film Renfield? [00:41:15] Speaker C: No. [00:41:16] Speaker B: It's about Dracula's handler, Renfield, and it stars Nicolas Cage. Came out two years ago. Written by none other than Ryan Ridley, son of Mark Ridley. You didn't know that? That he wrote Renfield? [00:41:29] Speaker A: It's funny because Ridley came through town, I want to say, either last year or the year before. He never mentioned Renfield. You never mentioned that. We were just talking about, you know, AI and some other stuff. He wanted to see the lodge. And then I can't remember if he stayed up. Anyway, Renfield never got a mention. [00:41:47] Speaker B: Yeah, well, it should have. That's. It was a big one. [00:41:49] Speaker A: No, he said. He said they were trying to drag him back into the whole Rick and Morty thing but he didn't really want [00:41:56] Speaker B: to or something because he wrote for that. [00:41:58] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:41:58] Speaker B: As well. Yeah, it did. Does Mark Ridley's comedy Castle still exist? [00:42:05] Speaker A: Yeah, I think so. [00:42:06] Speaker B: Still open? [00:42:07] Speaker A: Yeah, I think. I don't want to speak out of turn it, but I think he said it's. It might be a bit problematic because him and his brother don't really want to. [00:42:19] Speaker B: Oh, take. Take it on. [00:42:20] Speaker A: Keep it going. Oh, and the dad's obviously pretty long in the tooth. [00:42:25] Speaker B: He must be right. Yeah. Well, I saw a picture of Ridley and a bunch of Chicago comedy legends that were C.J. sullivan's 50th birthday party bombed to miss that, yeah, it was quite a gathering. [00:42:38] Speaker A: Did you see him this weekend? [00:42:40] Speaker B: I sure did. I spent the entire day with him on Saturday and you know, except coming to the charity. Coming to the charity event. [00:42:50] Speaker A: Supporting. [00:42:50] Speaker B: Now listen, last year I sent a nice check to a billion pennies foundation. I plan to send another nice check. My wife was out of town, I'd been gone for a couple days and at that point I needed to get back home. [00:43:03] Speaker A: So posh Bo say what now? Bit of posh boxing on the horizon. [00:43:08] Speaker B: Oh, because my wife was out. Yeah. See, you're always trying to get me in hot water at home and I'm not even going to take that bait. There was no posh boxing going on. [00:43:20] Speaker C: I'm looking in your eyes. [00:43:23] Speaker B: Yeah. Anyway, tell me about how was. [00:43:29] Speaker A: Was good. I mean like it executed well. It was in, in a, basically in a, you know, school gym. [00:43:35] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:43:35] Speaker A: 200 people came and there was, it was a South side bonanza of like Flannery, cj, Joey Villa, Gomez and Jenny Dugan. Jeannie Dugan rather. [00:43:47] Speaker B: Yep. [00:43:48] Speaker A: For me personally, I had to convert this gym. So it, it, as usual, it spiraled from yeah, this will take a few hours to. Yeah, this will take 20 hours. [00:43:57] Speaker B: You started at midweek, right? [00:43:59] Speaker A: Or now. We started it a while back just looking at what the logistics were and [00:44:04] Speaker B: have there been shows in there before? [00:44:07] Speaker A: They had done shows but they just sort of half assed them. [00:44:10] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:44:11] Speaker A: And we wanted to do good lights and sound, so that was the challenge. [00:44:16] Speaker B: Did you have a stage or do you have to bring that in? [00:44:18] Speaker A: No, they built a stage for us, thank God. [00:44:21] Speaker B: That's good. [00:44:23] Speaker A: But I had to build a light in truss and a few other bits and bobs that ended up taking a while. [00:44:31] Speaker B: How was cj? How did he talk about men's clubs? He told me he was going to because we spent the day at Mark Chili Palmer's Vanna's men's Club, the 2500 year round club. Said he's going to talk about men's clubs. [00:44:44] Speaker A: He talked about. No, I think he changed it up because a lot of those people had seen his act a couple of times. So he didn't do the weather. He didn't do the weather. He didn't do stuff he didn't do. You know, a lot of me here in Chicago. He talked about the World Cup Dick a little more, you know. [00:45:05] Speaker B: Yeah, he's got to change his act because these people have seen him four years in a row. [00:45:09] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:45:10] Speaker B: Did Hannibal come by? [00:45:12] Speaker A: No, he didn't. [00:45:13] Speaker B: There was talks about it. [00:45:14] Speaker A: Yeah. But he said as soon he texted Hannibal, like, hey, you know, I'm doing this thing. Do you want to come by? And Hannibal actually started looking up the history of the Hamburg Club and was like, hang on, these guys instigated Race Rio. [00:45:28] Speaker B: They beat up Langston Hughes in there. [00:45:29] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:45:30] Speaker B: Or something. [00:45:30] Speaker A: So I think, I think that warded him off coming. [00:45:33] Speaker B: Yeah, well, he told me that as well. And. But he also told me Hannibal's living here in Chicago. [00:45:39] Speaker A: Yeah, he has been for years. [00:45:40] Speaker B: I figured he was on the coast. We. Why can't we have men? We just gave him the greatest review of all time last week. [00:45:46] Speaker C: Right. [00:45:47] Speaker B: Let's have that fella in. [00:45:48] Speaker A: Oh, I'll give you his phone number. [00:45:49] Speaker B: Well, you know him better than me and we'll talk about. [00:45:53] Speaker C: I'll call them. [00:45:53] Speaker B: Yeah, he'll call. [00:45:55] Speaker C: Remember me from old Town Hall? Town. Old Town. What is it called? Ale House. [00:46:00] Speaker B: Listen, one of the highlights of my podcasting career was having legendary Beth Stelling in here. [00:46:06] Speaker C: Yep. [00:46:07] Speaker A: Right. [00:46:09] Speaker B: It would be even. It would be an enormous highlight of my life to have the great Hannibal. [00:46:15] Speaker C: Would you say a bigger highlight or a lower highlight? [00:46:18] Speaker B: I would say, I don't know. [00:46:20] Speaker C: Don't come out with equal. [00:46:21] Speaker B: I don't. I don't know until it happens. [00:46:23] Speaker C: Maybe it'll be bigger. [00:46:25] Speaker B: Best selling was true. [00:46:26] Speaker A: You have seen get the famous person. You told me you have a direct [00:46:32] Speaker B: line to Johnny Galecki. [00:46:35] Speaker A: I thought you wanted left off. [00:46:38] Speaker B: I don't know Johnny Galecki. I. I have a connection, though. We have him come in here and talk about that. That play that you saw of his. [00:46:47] Speaker A: Yeah. Why am I always heavy lifted? [00:46:50] Speaker B: That's not gonna happen. Well, because you got all the connections. You go on and on about all these famous people. [00:46:56] Speaker C: I've had more guests on my phone. [00:46:59] Speaker B: Yeah, you've had guests on your phone. You got Borky in here. [00:47:01] Speaker C: Yep. [00:47:01] Speaker B: You got the scan man. I'll bring in some people. [00:47:05] Speaker A: Yeah, bring them in. [00:47:06] Speaker C: I had John Becker and his baby. [00:47:08] Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah, that was great. [00:47:11] Speaker A: He'd been promising since the first series to bring a youth in. Get youth. [00:47:15] Speaker B: I'll bring a youth in. Talk about coke. [00:47:19] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:47:19] Speaker B: And what they put in Epidemic and. Yeah, well, I don't want it. What are they putting in there for my own kid? [00:47:24] Speaker C: I wonder, I wonder. I wonder if Tim Allen's $40,000 worth of cocaine. Where is stepped on is the cocaine nowadays? [00:47:32] Speaker B: All right, well, I. I don't know, but I do know this. [00:47:38] Speaker C: What? [00:47:38] Speaker B: I have a Tim Allen story. Yeah, personal Tim Allen story. [00:47:41] Speaker C: Laid on us. [00:47:43] Speaker B: The year was 1994. The Place, Columbia, Missouri. Specifically Schnook's grocery store in Columbia, Missouri. I was in there getting some sundry items. I don't remember what. And who do I see buzzing around, headed to the checkout, tooted to the gills. Tim Allen walking around Columbia, Missouri, schnooks out of his mind. On. [00:48:19] Speaker C: Wait, he was tooted out. [00:48:20] Speaker B: He was tooted out of his mind. He was zapping. [00:48:22] Speaker C: He was. [00:48:22] Speaker B: He was. He was shouting things out. He was like, really? Like, he was on. Like he was on a Frisco speedball. [00:48:30] Speaker A: He's still got the Colombian marching powder. Like. [00:48:33] Speaker B: Yeah, it was all over. It was all over his face, basically. [00:48:37] Speaker C: For real. I was trying to find reminiscent music, but that's not working out. He was all coked up. [00:48:41] Speaker B: He was all coked up to the gills and he was making jokes and. And doing banter with the checkout girl. And I was right behind him, like completely beside myself that I was standing behind Tim Allen at the height of his powers. We're talking three or four years after this. [00:48:58] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:48:59] Speaker B: Right. [00:48:59] Speaker A: So in the, in the very heart, which. [00:49:01] Speaker C: Yeah. In improvement in 1994, there in one week he had the top selling book, the top movie and the top. [00:49:08] Speaker B: This is like the biggest celebrity in the world at the time. [00:49:10] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:49:11] Speaker B: Standing in a Schnooks checkout line in Columbia, Missouri. I was going all snooked up and he. He's doing his bits and you know, joking around. I can't remember what he was saying exactly. And then I'm standing right behind him in the checkout line and he turns to look at me and then I just looked at him like this and then looked away. I wouldn't give him the. [00:49:34] Speaker C: Yeah, you don't want him. You don't want to make like, hey, Tim Allen. [00:49:37] Speaker B: Hey, you know. [00:49:38] Speaker C: Yeah. Just like me with Hannibal Burris. You don't want to feed their ego. [00:49:41] Speaker B: Yep. And I just look, can't have getting [00:49:43] Speaker C: a big head and because of you. [00:49:45] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:49:45] Speaker C: Might damage their career, man. That's on you. You got to think about that for the rest of your life. [00:49:49] Speaker A: What car did he get into? [00:49:51] Speaker B: I didn't see that. But after the guy, after he left and I was like, what the hell is Tim Allen doing here? And asking him people like, yeah, I guess somebody there said he's. He was there for his sister's wedding or something. Sister was marrying somebody from their brother. Fuck, I don't know. It was some, some wedding. He was in town for a wedding. [00:50:10] Speaker C: Huh. [00:50:11] Speaker B: That's my Tim Allen story. [00:50:13] Speaker A: Did you get his number? [00:50:16] Speaker B: Nope. No, I don't have any of that. Well, it was a brush with greatness, though. [00:50:19] Speaker C: Yeah. What did he buy? [00:50:22] Speaker B: I don't remember. Stuff. [00:50:27] Speaker C: Beer. [00:50:27] Speaker B: It was. [00:50:27] Speaker C: It was liquor. [00:50:30] Speaker B: Wash down his coat. [00:50:31] Speaker A: If he was already whizzing his tits off, why did he need whiskey? [00:50:35] Speaker C: Even it out. [00:50:35] Speaker B: I don't know if it was whiskey. I don't remember exactly what it was. [00:50:37] Speaker C: Get back to zero. [00:50:39] Speaker B: Yeah. Even himself out. [00:50:40] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:50:43] Speaker B: Well, why did you choose this? I'm glad you did for a couple reasons. But why did you choose us? Tim Allen to watch? You liked him, Alan? [00:50:50] Speaker C: Oh, yeah. I loved Home Improvement growing up. [00:50:53] Speaker B: Did you? [00:50:53] Speaker C: Yeah. And I lived. [00:50:54] Speaker B: You were young. [00:50:54] Speaker C: When I was in college, I lived with a guy that also had an affair for the show. And so we used to watch it a lot. So, yeah, I was always a Tim Allen fan. Santa Claus is all right. We used to watch that a lot in my household. It was okay. [00:51:06] Speaker B: How about Jingle all the Way? [00:51:08] Speaker C: I think by then I was kind of out. Santa Claus. I watched a lot because I got younger sisters, so, you know, something to watch with your sisters. But the rest of it, I. I kind of tuned out by that point. Why did I. [00:51:19] Speaker B: Why did you choose it? [00:51:20] Speaker C: Because I was looking for something classic. We are on kind of a tear of Dave Attell and Andrew Dice Clay, and I wanted to explore more about the sociological progression of this sort of. Of this sort of male speak on stage. As we know, the last two were. They had a gap in between, and so does this with these other mentioned comedians. And also I wanted to tell the story about the $40,000 worth of cocaine that he sold to an agent. [00:51:53] Speaker B: So you're putting him in the same breath as the Dice man and Dave Attell. You're saying he's of. That. He's on that plane as far as [00:52:01] Speaker C: the brand of comedy, as far as the smell of it. [00:52:05] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah, yeah. [00:52:08] Speaker C: I wouldn't say it's too similar, though. It's a very different kind of flavor. [00:52:13] Speaker B: Sure. What are your feelings about Tim Allen going into watching this? You like Tim Allen. You hate Tim Allen. [00:52:19] Speaker A: I was trying to decide whether I liked. I can't remember. I remember watching Home Improvement quite a lot. I didn't view it as a typical lame American sitcom. It seemed to have a little. Little message to it and little like [00:52:34] Speaker B: a morality play of some kind. [00:52:37] Speaker A: Well, there was always. He was always asking Wilson to help solve his moral dilemma for the week. Right? [00:52:44] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:52:44] Speaker A: And his wife pretty much gave as good as she got. [00:52:48] Speaker B: And who was the wife? [00:52:49] Speaker A: Patricia someone. [00:52:50] Speaker C: Not Patricia o'. Neill. [00:52:52] Speaker B: The one. The wife from Raymond. [00:52:54] Speaker C: No, no. [00:52:55] Speaker B: Everybody loves Raymond. [00:52:56] Speaker C: Patricia o'. Neill, I think her name is. [00:52:58] Speaker B: I know now there's. There are a couple kids on the show. One of them was a big teen heartthrob. [00:53:03] Speaker C: Yep. Jonathan Taylor Thomas. [00:53:05] Speaker B: Now is he. Is. He passed away, I believe. [00:53:08] Speaker C: Did he die? [00:53:09] Speaker B: I think so. [00:53:09] Speaker A: No, I think they're all still alive. Zachary, Ty, Bryan. [00:53:13] Speaker B: Oh, yeah. [00:53:14] Speaker A: And there was another one. [00:53:14] Speaker C: Yeah, there's Brad. [00:53:16] Speaker A: Think I clicked on all of the links in wiki and they're all living. Yeah. [00:53:20] Speaker B: I thought Jonathan Taylor Thomas, he. He might have. Did the Dutch. [00:53:26] Speaker C: Did the Dutch. What is that? [00:53:27] Speaker B: Offed himself. [00:53:28] Speaker C: No, I don't think JTT has it in him. [00:53:31] Speaker A: No. [00:53:32] Speaker C: Hey theory. [00:53:33] Speaker A: He came out, then he. One of them. [00:53:35] Speaker B: Did Jonathan Taylor Thomas take his own life? [00:53:44] Speaker C: I found this on the web. Who calls it the Web? Siri, get out of here. [00:53:48] Speaker B: Siri blows. Siri. AI. [00:53:49] Speaker C: I'm gonna get on the web and get myself a pair of sneakers. [00:53:52] Speaker B: A tragic real life story of Jonathan Taylor Thomas. He was also the voice of Simba from Disney's Lion King. [00:53:58] Speaker C: He was Simba. [00:53:59] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:53:59] Speaker C: The original Lion King. [00:54:01] Speaker B: Nathan Brubecker says, I found Patricia Richardson incredibly beautiful. [00:54:04] Speaker C: Patricia Richardson. That was her name. [00:54:06] Speaker B: I liked her more than the Tool Time woman. Remember that? Tool Time Heidi. [00:54:10] Speaker A: Well, I don't know. Pamela Anderson. [00:54:12] Speaker B: That was Pam Anderson. That's right. [00:54:14] Speaker A: One of them was. [00:54:15] Speaker C: Yeah, right. Then she got too big. She had to leave. [00:54:18] Speaker B: Tim Allen and Jay Leno. Controversy is sad, but let's focus on Jonathan's bright future ahead. What happened to Jay Leno and Tim Allen? [00:54:25] Speaker C: I don't know. They have some beef. [00:54:31] Speaker B: You missed JTT on 8 Simple or whatever. No, no. Somebody. Somebody point. [00:54:37] Speaker A: All right, so, yeah, I. I sort of vaguely remember liking Home Improvement because [00:54:44] Speaker B: you're from Great Britain, so. [00:54:45] Speaker A: Which is kind of against the grain. [00:54:48] Speaker B: Well, you'd be. Yeah, it's lame. It was a lame show. [00:54:52] Speaker A: I mean, I didn't know him as a stand up. I never. I had a fight. You know how every comedian did their cash in book? So like Ellen DeGeneres had whatever it was. [00:55:01] Speaker B: Yeah. Jay Leno leading with my chin. Ellen DeGeneres books over here somewhere. [00:55:06] Speaker A: Even Foxworthy had a cash in. [00:55:08] Speaker B: Sure. [00:55:09] Speaker A: I don't remember reading the Tall Man. [00:55:12] Speaker C: It was don't stand too close to a Naked Man. [00:55:14] Speaker B: Yeah, he's right. He knows everything. [00:55:16] Speaker A: They always had like stupid ass. Clever titles. [00:55:20] Speaker B: Yeah, if you call that clever. [00:55:23] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:55:23] Speaker A: I told you that the best. The best cash in book I ever read was Drew Carey's Cash In. Cash in book. Okay, I'm famous now. Let me just shit a book out. [00:55:34] Speaker B: Was who? Drew Carey's. [00:55:35] Speaker A: Drew Carey's book was great because he. He ends. I've told you this before, he ends the book with three really dark stories that he said. Everyone told me, don't put these in the book, they're too dark. Because he. He has quite a wide dark streak to him. Drew Carey. [00:55:51] Speaker B: He does, yeah. [00:55:53] Speaker A: And they were really good. [00:55:54] Speaker B: They're good stories. [00:55:55] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:55:56] Speaker B: Does he have a stand up special? I think he does. We'll fire him out of the shite cannon. [00:56:00] Speaker A: Yeah, I think he would be good. [00:56:02] Speaker C: I know. I know he does because he had a joke about global warming and inviting it and saying, us in the Midwest, we just stand out there with aerosol cans in the front yard, spraying them into the air. [00:56:10] Speaker B: Wait till we get to that. There's so. I mean, this is why the show is so great, to have a really [00:56:16] Speaker A: good show on satellite radio on Little Stevens Underground Garage every Friday night. I would catch it driving here. [00:56:24] Speaker C: What do you got? [00:56:25] Speaker B: Satellite? You don't have satellite radio money? You got satellite radio money? [00:56:28] Speaker A: I. I had to. I drive to Walk Egan and back every bleeding day. I've had satellite radio going on 15 years. I'll bet. [00:56:38] Speaker B: Still. [00:56:38] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:56:39] Speaker B: Still paying that. [00:56:39] Speaker A: Yeah. But Drew Carey had this amazing show where he would, like, it was like garage. It was like. It was like garage rarities and, and stuff and just everyone. [00:56:52] Speaker B: What do you mean cars? About cars? [00:56:54] Speaker A: No, no songs. [00:56:56] Speaker B: Oh, garage rarities. Yeah, I know you're trying to say garage. [00:56:59] Speaker C: It's a genre, yeah. [00:57:01] Speaker B: Oh, it is. That's a genre of music. Garage. [00:57:04] Speaker C: Garage. [00:57:05] Speaker B: Yeah, garage. [00:57:06] Speaker A: Lo fi. [00:57:08] Speaker B: Garage rock. [00:57:09] Speaker A: Just banging away. Yeah. [00:57:10] Speaker C: Like the band guided by voices, 1975. [00:57:15] Speaker B: I don't know who. [00:57:17] Speaker A: The band. [00:57:18] Speaker C: Yeah, the band. [00:57:19] Speaker B: That band blows. [00:57:21] Speaker C: 1975. [00:57:22] Speaker B: They're a new band. [00:57:23] Speaker C: Are they? [00:57:24] Speaker A: Yeah, they blow like, get like. Garage rock is like, you know, lo fi, punky sort of rock. [00:57:32] Speaker B: Yeah, I like that. Kind of. I like American garish. [00:57:36] Speaker A: Well, in England it was called pub rock. Oh, that's how. That's how Bowie started out. [00:57:41] Speaker B: He was doing pub rock. [00:57:42] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:57:43] Speaker B: Over here we got pub cheese. You ever have pub cheese? [00:57:45] Speaker A: No. [00:57:46] Speaker B: It's like a chi. You know what I'm talking about. [00:57:47] Speaker C: Yeah, I know you're talking about, but [00:57:49] Speaker B: you take a pretzel and you drag [00:57:50] Speaker C: it like beer cheese. [00:57:51] Speaker B: Yeah, beer cheese. [00:57:53] Speaker A: I went to the Pub that Bowie first did it. [00:57:55] Speaker B: Really? You ever see Bowie live? [00:57:58] Speaker A: Nah. Logo painted on the wall. [00:58:00] Speaker B: That's cool. [00:58:01] Speaker A: They're trying to turn it into a mini Bowie museum, but the locals aren't happy. They're like, we don't want 8 million people coming here every day. [00:58:09] Speaker B: What about Stanley Kubrick? You ever see him over there in England? [00:58:14] Speaker A: He was over there. [00:58:15] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:58:15] Speaker A: Yeah. I went down the shops. [00:58:17] Speaker C: Place lousy with Stanley Kubrick walking around. [00:58:19] Speaker A: Daddy say, I'll go down the shops and get us a loaf of bread. We're out again. [00:58:22] Speaker B: Again. [00:58:24] Speaker A: I don't want to get. I want to get cornered by Kubrick. Talking about Dr. Strangelove. Yeah. Dr. Strangelove again. [00:58:33] Speaker B: Yeah. Okay. All right. [00:58:36] Speaker A: Do you want to know an interesting Kubrick story? [00:58:38] Speaker B: Yeah, I love Kubrick. He's my idol. [00:58:42] Speaker A: So I might. Stop me if you heard this one before. [00:58:45] Speaker B: No, we haven't heard any Kubrick stories on this program in three seasons. [00:58:49] Speaker A: When Clockwork Orange was released, it caused major issues in England. Youths just painted up and were walking around. A woman was raped and they played this, you know, singing in the rain or whatever it was while they raped her. [00:59:06] Speaker B: Just like in the film. [00:59:07] Speaker A: Just like in the film. So Kubrick said, no more and banned his own film from being shown in England. Just said, we're not showing Clockwork Orange anymore in England. These people are lunatics. [00:59:23] Speaker B: Yeah. Still banned. [00:59:24] Speaker A: And it strikes. No, it's. I don't think it's anymore. So for years it was banned in England. People would have to, like, basically take a cross channel ferry and they'd find, like, cinemas in the north of France were cute about. [00:59:39] Speaker B: You couldn't see it anywhere in the [00:59:41] Speaker A: United Kingdom, so it became a thing. [00:59:42] Speaker B: What about the rest of the United Kingdom? [00:59:45] Speaker A: Wales, the whole kitten caboodle? [00:59:49] Speaker B: Northern Ireland couldn't see it. [00:59:51] Speaker A: I once smuggled in VHS copies of Reservoir Dogs and Clockwork Orange into England from Australia when I went there. [00:59:59] Speaker B: Wow, those are hot. Yeah, we couldn't. People couldn't see them. [01:00:03] Speaker A: People couldn't see them. [01:00:04] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:00:04] Speaker A: And the Aussies have the same. [01:00:06] Speaker B: There's a good documentary about that. I don't know if you saw it. [01:00:09] Speaker C: About the. [01:00:09] Speaker B: The whole banning of the film. And in England. [01:00:11] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:00:12] Speaker B: About Clockwork Orange. [01:00:13] Speaker A: Yeah. Yep. [01:00:15] Speaker B: All right. The seaman's falling asleep over here. Your story. He's coming down off of whatever he was on when he started. [01:00:22] Speaker A: I told you this with ten to five. I told you this would go to half five. [01:00:27] Speaker C: Yeah, well, this ain't going to. [01:00:29] Speaker B: It's not five. This is going to go end in the next five minutes. [01:00:32] Speaker A: No one here is getting home before half five. [01:00:35] Speaker B: Well, getting home. I don't know about getting home by half five. [01:00:37] Speaker A: That's why I got cabbage rolls in the slow cooker today. [01:00:41] Speaker B: Cabbage? What are cabbage? Like goumpki, like egg rolls? [01:00:45] Speaker A: No, cabbage rolls. It's like you get. You get minced beef, bit of pepper. What are the gr. The soup crackers, blah, blah. Ball it up and then you wrap it in a cabbage. [01:00:59] Speaker C: On the cabbage leaf, do you put the. The tomato on top? Tomato paste? Yeah. My. My buddies, my buddy's mom who's from Poland, when I was growing up, used to make those and call them guamki. He'd always call me up, he'd say I was making guanky tonight and I'd be over there for dinner. [01:01:14] Speaker A: V8. [01:01:16] Speaker B: It's rolled up in a cabbage leaf. [01:01:17] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah. Like, you ball it up tight, you put a cabbage leaf around it. [01:01:21] Speaker C: So good. [01:01:22] Speaker A: Boom, in it goes. And you slow cook. [01:01:23] Speaker C: You put rice out of it. You put rice in yours, right? [01:01:25] Speaker A: It's got rice, saltine crackers, pepper. [01:01:28] Speaker B: Saltine crackers in the cabbage roll. [01:01:31] Speaker A: Now you mush it up. [01:01:32] Speaker C: Yeah, it, like, absorbs all the moisture. [01:01:35] Speaker B: No wonder you got a knocker knee that. You can't be eating that shit. [01:01:38] Speaker A: No, it's good for you. [01:01:39] Speaker C: It's rice and. [01:01:40] Speaker B: Yeah, and saltine crackers and chip beef. [01:01:43] Speaker A: Not many beef. [01:01:45] Speaker B: Minced beef. [01:01:46] Speaker C: Whatever. [01:01:46] Speaker B: Whatever you're saying. Chip beef. You know, chip beef. [01:01:50] Speaker C: Lamb, maybe sometimes too lamb in there. Kibby. [01:01:53] Speaker A: I always loved it. When I first came to America, I was like, oh, this is some good stuff. I don't remember. [01:01:59] Speaker B: We don't have that here. [01:02:00] Speaker A: But then for years I was put off of it. Do you want to know? Do you want to join a cabbage roll story? [01:02:07] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:02:08] Speaker A: So it's kind of gross. [01:02:09] Speaker C: Dangerous. [01:02:10] Speaker B: Maybe we're not getting home by half off. [01:02:11] Speaker A: So, like, the cafeteria where I worked would serve cabbage, you know, the cabbage balls. The cafeteria would serve cabbage, cabbage rolls, whatever you want. [01:02:23] Speaker C: But, like, where you worked or were you. [01:02:24] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah. [01:02:25] Speaker C: That is a risky move. What sort of work is Abby? Cafeteria cabbage. Now go back to your office and stick the place up. [01:02:33] Speaker A: Yeah, so here's the thing. Lovely stuff. One day and I got really. Got into it. Then they stopped doing it in the cafeteria. So I would buy them, you know, you can buy them from the Jewel Deli counter. [01:02:44] Speaker C: That's news to me. [01:02:45] Speaker B: You can buy cabbage rolls from the Jewel Deli. [01:02:47] Speaker A: Used to be able to, wherever they stopped I don't know. So I used to get them once. Once a week, I get cabbage rolls from Jewel Deli, take them to work. One day, I was looking forward to my cabbage roll dinner. I was having a piss and this. [01:03:03] Speaker B: Actually going to the bathroom. [01:03:04] Speaker A: Yeah, going. [01:03:04] Speaker C: Getting hammered. [01:03:05] Speaker B: Because that means going to. Having, like, making a joke or something. [01:03:09] Speaker A: So I'm in the toilet, having a wowz. Having a piss, having a wee. Whatever you want to call it. And this sad sack guy I used to work with, Rob, comes in and I'm just. [01:03:19] Speaker B: Rob's not listening. [01:03:20] Speaker A: Yeah. And I'm getting. I'm getting geared up for my cabbage roll lunch. Right. I'm excited about it. He stands next to me and proceeds to rip the most disgusting fart that you have ever heard. It was like. [01:03:37] Speaker B: Is to be funny, like. [01:03:39] Speaker A: No, he was just, you know, some dudes, that's where they fart is in the toilet. [01:03:44] Speaker B: Oh, in the toilet. [01:03:45] Speaker A: I thought it was standing at the urinal, both, you know, having a wasp. And he rips this far. I swear, it was like 3:30 seconds long, like he was strangling. [01:03:56] Speaker C: He couldn't wait till you walked away. [01:03:59] Speaker B: Well, listen, sometimes when you're. You're at the urinal, you can't. The two things come out at the same time. [01:04:04] Speaker A: You can't hold it back. The pressure. [01:04:06] Speaker C: The pressure, yeah. Really? Yeah. [01:04:07] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:04:08] Speaker A: So he rips this far and it was. It. Oh, my God. It was the most disgusting thing you've ever smelled. [01:04:15] Speaker B: Disgusting or just the sound and length of its. [01:04:18] Speaker A: The smell wasn't so bad, but the noise. [01:04:22] Speaker C: And then you got to the cabbage. [01:04:23] Speaker A: Horrendous. And I have to go back to my desk and eat my cabbage. [01:04:29] Speaker C: Right. And then you're thinking, this smells like Rob's fart over here. [01:04:31] Speaker A: Yeah. This is, you know, and cabbage rolls [01:04:33] Speaker C: can't beat Rob's fart for lunch. [01:04:35] Speaker B: It ruined it. [01:04:36] Speaker A: And I literally couldn't. And then. And then that was it. I couldn't touch cabbage rolls for about two years. Wow. Every time I saw them. [01:04:43] Speaker B: That's a good example of Pavlov's classical conditioning. [01:04:47] Speaker C: Yes. Yeah. [01:04:48] Speaker B: Cabbage made you think of Rob's fart. [01:04:50] Speaker A: Cabbage rolls. [01:04:51] Speaker B: Cabbage rolls. [01:04:52] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:04:54] Speaker B: But you're back now. Now, tonight, when you get home. Now let the lid off of this. [01:04:58] Speaker A: No, I've developed psycho, like, psychological mechanisms for blotting it out. [01:05:06] Speaker C: This isn't going to make you relapse telling the story here. [01:05:08] Speaker A: Honestly. Honestly, it's not Rob. [01:05:14] Speaker B: Wow. [01:05:14] Speaker A: That is ruined food for you in that way. Like, every time I have a. If I have a pet die, I purposely stay away from any meal that I enjoy in case it becomes intrinsically linked to that experience. [01:05:32] Speaker C: No, I don't have that. [01:05:36] Speaker B: No. [01:05:36] Speaker A: I used to love the Michael Caine movie Water. I would play it habitually over and over, and then we watched it the night before Heather had to put one of her cats to sleep. And now I can't watch it anymore. [01:05:49] Speaker C: Huh. [01:05:51] Speaker B: Well, why don't you employ your psychological mechanism on that that you use to eat the cabbage roll? You just pick and choose how you use that psychological mechanism. [01:06:01] Speaker A: Yeah. Specific to food. [01:06:04] Speaker B: All right, let's. We've digressed too much here. We're here to talk about Tim Allen. Talking about. Yeah. What? Yeah, I like it, but let's give the people what they want. [01:06:15] Speaker A: C.J. [01:06:16] Speaker B: was talking about the show a little bit. He listens. [01:06:18] Speaker C: Oh, yeah. No, he really? [01:06:20] Speaker B: Well, he said he does. [01:06:22] Speaker C: No, he does. [01:06:23] Speaker B: He said I never really get to the review. You guys are just talking the whole time. And, you know. Which is true. Tim Allen. [01:06:33] Speaker A: I'm gonna highly doubt CJ Sullivan's listened to one minute of this. And if you're out there, C.J. listening, this is. [01:06:40] Speaker C: Fuck off. [01:06:41] Speaker A: No, no, no. This is my taunt. If you're listening and don't snitch and dob me in. If CJ Sullivan is truly listening to this, he can pick his phone up right now and text me and say, I'm truly listening to this. [01:06:55] Speaker B: Well, he may be behind on episodes we have. Doesn't matter how many episodes we canned in this show. Thousand. [01:07:02] Speaker A: I can wait. [01:07:02] Speaker B: We're gonna do something for our hundredth episode. Yeah, it's gotta be coming up. [01:07:06] Speaker C: We've already crossed 100, haven't we? Hold on, let me check. [01:07:08] Speaker B: No way. [01:07:09] Speaker A: No. [01:07:11] Speaker B: Can we do something big for the hundred? Have a party here, Cater. Bringing food. Bringing cabbage rolls. [01:07:16] Speaker A: Cabbage rolls. [01:07:17] Speaker B: Yeah, I'd like to. [01:07:18] Speaker C: I mean, could you. Oswalt was our 55th episode. [01:07:22] Speaker B: Oswald. Pat Oswald. [01:07:24] Speaker C: Yeah. [01:07:25] Speaker B: That was years ago. [01:07:27] Speaker C: Right. We might be past 100 by now. [01:07:31] Speaker B: He'll let us know. Tim Allen's the thing I love best about Tim Allen's men are pigs. 27 minutes long. [01:07:40] Speaker C: Yep. That's. That's another reason I picked it. I saw it, I looked it up. I said half an hour. We're done. That's it. [01:07:45] Speaker B: That was beautiful. [01:07:46] Speaker C: I'm doing that as much as I can now. [01:07:48] Speaker A: At the end, he says I have to leave. [01:07:50] Speaker C: Yeah. [01:07:50] Speaker B: Yeah. There's no way those people paid in that backdrop for 27 I think he was nervous. [01:07:56] Speaker C: Do you think he was nervous? I think he was kind of a little bit like, I. What am I doing here? Like, this is. I mean, this is early on for him. [01:08:02] Speaker B: At one point, I sweat. [01:08:03] Speaker C: Yeah. And then he was like, beat it [01:08:04] Speaker B: down and like, drop a raindrop. [01:08:06] Speaker C: Yeah. And then he started. Well, that's just trying to manage it more. [01:08:09] Speaker B: Yeah. You think he was tooted up for this? You think going to the can would clean, you know, set him straight? [01:08:15] Speaker C: I thought. I thought. I thought if you sell coke, you don't do coke. Otherwise you're gonna do all the coke you're trying to sell. [01:08:20] Speaker B: They say don't. Don't get high on your own supply. [01:08:22] Speaker C: Maybe I'm. I guess he wasn't doing. He wasn't selling it anymore. By the time you saw him. [01:08:25] Speaker A: I'm like that with crisps. Tim Allen is 76. Okay. [01:08:29] Speaker B: We got some time. We got some time to play in the hundredth. It's gonna be a big one. Bring the wives in. Get dressed up. [01:08:35] Speaker C: Oh, this is the 76th episode. Not Tim Allen. 76 years old. [01:08:38] Speaker B: He could also be 76. [01:08:40] Speaker C: It sounds about right. [01:08:40] Speaker A: 73, I think. [01:08:42] Speaker B: 73. Tim Allen's not out doing his act anymore, right? I wouldn't think. [01:08:47] Speaker C: He's not on tour. [01:08:48] Speaker B: No, I wouldn't think. [01:08:49] Speaker C: No, he's got. [01:08:49] Speaker A: That. [01:08:49] Speaker C: He's got. He's got all that Toy Story money coming through. He's got the Toy Story money. He doesn't need to. [01:08:56] Speaker A: Galaxy Quest. And that's highly rated. [01:08:59] Speaker C: Yeah. Somebody told me that that was their favorite Tim Allen movie earlier today. Yeah. I've never seen it look like. It looked like a blue. [01:09:07] Speaker B: One thing Tim Allen's never done is serious drama. [01:09:12] Speaker C: Yeah. You know what? Actually, I saw a quote from him that he said, I can't really do. I can't really act. It has to be something that I'm used to that, like, really happened to me. I have to draw from my own personal experience, he said. So my will goes dry pretty quick. [01:09:22] Speaker B: Yeah, he's. [01:09:23] Speaker C: I'd imagine he doesn't really try to. [01:09:24] Speaker B: He's a one too much one trick pony. [01:09:27] Speaker C: Hey, it worked for him. Look at. Look at this career he's got. [01:09:29] Speaker B: Well, before we look at this, he's [01:09:30] Speaker C: won Golden Globes and Emmys and People's Choice Awards. [01:09:34] Speaker B: He's won a lot. He's highly decorated. [01:09:35] Speaker C: Yeah, he is. [01:09:36] Speaker B: But what do you think of this special? Lay it bare. [01:09:40] Speaker A: So. All right. I mean, it's, It's. It's Identity comedy taken to. [01:09:45] Speaker C: Yep. [01:09:46] Speaker A: And it's like one joke. [01:09:48] Speaker B: It is one joke. Literally one joke. [01:09:51] Speaker A: He varies between DIY jokes and difference between men and women. Just a sort of little shimmy. [01:09:58] Speaker C: Yeah. [01:09:59] Speaker B: Is some of the worst writing I think I've ever. [01:10:02] Speaker C: You barely have to think. [01:10:03] Speaker B: Ever seen. [01:10:04] Speaker A: You would think it would appeal to someone like me. [01:10:06] Speaker B: Yeah, because you're diy. [01:10:08] Speaker A: But what's funny is I was telling Christian I fell asleep watching it on the first attempt last night because my body is losing weight right now, and I'm lacking. [01:10:17] Speaker B: Wait, how much weight have you lost? What are. You were 27? [01:10:19] Speaker A: Yeah. Just on another spurt. But then I. I went back and watched it again today. You know, finished it off, like. I was like, okay, I know roughly where I fell asleep. And you know what? I liked it better this time. [01:10:33] Speaker B: Better during the day. [01:10:34] Speaker A: Yeah. I don't know. [01:10:35] Speaker B: That's what was different about you when you came in. You look different. You're. You're losing too much weight. [01:10:41] Speaker C: No, you're wasting away. [01:10:43] Speaker A: Just want to get to the point. [01:10:44] Speaker B: You're looking very gaunt. [01:10:46] Speaker C: Oh, isn't that what he says about you? Who's gaunter? [01:10:51] Speaker A: I would love to look gaunt. [01:10:53] Speaker C: Who's the gauntest person at the Link? [01:10:55] Speaker B: God's not a compliment. Gaunt's a terror. [01:10:56] Speaker A: Gaunt's like, sickly compliment it gives. You got cheekbones. You look like a sallow. You look sallow, Hitman. [01:11:05] Speaker B: Your skin looks sallow and ashen. [01:11:08] Speaker A: Yeah, that'd be good. [01:11:09] Speaker B: You look like E.T. when E.T. was laying in the ditch. Remember when they find him in the ditch, he's. [01:11:15] Speaker C: When was he in the ditch? [01:11:16] Speaker B: When he was dying. [01:11:17] Speaker C: What do you think, Doug? Did he, like, escaped? [01:11:19] Speaker B: I don't know. Ravine of some kind. [01:11:23] Speaker A: Can I just do my Tim Allen notes and leave? [01:11:25] Speaker C: I thought you're gonna say, can you do it? [01:11:27] Speaker B: No, I want. I've been waiting for this. We all have to do a Tim Allen impression. Go do yours. He's already kind of did one. But you got. [01:11:34] Speaker A: What's the one. [01:11:36] Speaker C: We can edit that. [01:11:38] Speaker A: The one. [01:11:39] Speaker C: I'm gonna back it up. [01:11:39] Speaker A: The one at the end of the Home Improvement. Yeah, yeah. [01:11:45] Speaker B: That's at the end of the. [01:11:46] Speaker C: No, that's. That's the very beginning. Because then the wrench clanks, and then it goes into the theme song. And I was wondering if they sampled that from this special just like they sampled Andrew Dice Clay for She's Unbelievable or you're unbelievable. Yeah, Remember we talked about that? [01:12:01] Speaker B: Oh, yeah. [01:12:03] Speaker A: I can't believe that he adds the ooh to every God damn. I assume it would just be a one hit per act. [01:12:12] Speaker C: Yeah. Like, what were we watching where he. Oh, it was the Andrew Dice Clay thing. Like, right away he gave him the, you know, the. This is what I do. [01:12:18] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:12:19] Speaker C: This is my knock knock joke. Whatever he does. Wasn't there another comedian where he's, like, famous for doing one thing, Larry the Cable Guy, I think. And he just got out of the way early and he never went. Yeah, he did it once in the beginning. He said, that's all you get. You know, Tim Allen. No, you get more. [01:12:36] Speaker A: You get it every hour. [01:12:37] Speaker C: You get a half hour of it. [01:12:39] Speaker B: Oh, my word. [01:12:40] Speaker A: Sometimes it was like, why are you even doing it now? Yeah, you're just adding it to every sentence. [01:12:46] Speaker C: Well, it gets a reaction. I think he. He was nervous and I think he also knew, like, hey, I've got this crutch I can fall back on. [01:12:53] Speaker B: Oh, it's. Did you see the end? Like, did you watch it all the way through the credits? [01:12:58] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:12:58] Speaker B: People filing out of the theater and they have, like, pig masks or pig noses. And as you know, they. They're hammered up for the camera. [01:13:06] Speaker A: Do you think that was planted, though? I think the pig mask. [01:13:09] Speaker C: Oh, yeah. They're giving away inside. They had to be. But then you. Did you see the one guy that didn't know how to do it? He was going o. [01:13:16] Speaker B: It was like, him. That's not like G impression. [01:13:19] Speaker C: It's not even close. [01:13:22] Speaker B: Women don't have a toolbox. They got a cosmetics case. [01:13:28] Speaker C: Yeah. [01:13:30] Speaker B: Now, one of the things I noticed with his act is he's sort of clean. He could be totally clean, but he injects these. These swears that don't fit. [01:13:40] Speaker C: Like, curse in there. [01:13:41] Speaker B: Yeah. And it's unnecessary cursing that like, kind of pulls the curtain back on who he is. Kind of is like a scumbag. Right. Otherwise you could play this anywhere. This. But then he'll like drop A1. [01:13:55] Speaker A: That was the weird. [01:13:57] Speaker C: There's a few. [01:13:58] Speaker A: I thought he only swore. I was like, wow, he's only sworn like four or five. [01:14:02] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. [01:14:02] Speaker A: For essentially what is a male audience. [01:14:06] Speaker C: Yeah. [01:14:06] Speaker B: But like, the. They're out of place, the swears. Right. Like, they don't fit, you know, like, it shows that, like, he's like. To me, it shows me that he's like a real shithead, you know, I [01:14:18] Speaker C: thought he just didn't really know how to do it yet, you know? [01:14:21] Speaker B: What do people say about. In the Hollywood community? Is he liked. Is he loathed I would think. [01:14:27] Speaker C: I hated. I never hear anything about him. I think everyone's just kind of fine with him. [01:14:30] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:14:31] Speaker C: Yeah. [01:14:32] Speaker B: He's Buzz Lighty, like a real shit, you know. [01:14:36] Speaker A: Normally people won't work with you then, so. [01:14:38] Speaker C: Yeah. [01:14:39] Speaker B: Well, what is he? [01:14:40] Speaker C: He's worked with everybody. [01:14:41] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:14:41] Speaker C: People keep giving him projects. He's playing the same guy over and over again for 40 years now. [01:14:46] Speaker A: You know what was weird is he had this super nice sharp suit on, which obviously you like that, but that's got nothing to do with the character. Right. You're doing suit and then you've got this back. The backdrop was the pack. Someone was on coke when they did that backdrop. What the hell is this? [01:15:04] Speaker C: Pretty crazy. [01:15:05] Speaker B: Was it a cartoonish? [01:15:08] Speaker A: The director wants locking up because he did the whole joke about the pegboards. Why didn't he cut to the pegboard on the stage? [01:15:16] Speaker B: Left, right, stage left, stage. All [01:15:21] Speaker C: the tracing of the tools on [01:15:23] Speaker A: the one particular was on one thing, the pegboard side. Just weird. And then two. Did you spot this one? $238 for a conduit bender. You betrayed yourself. Yeah, Tim. [01:15:38] Speaker C: Right. [01:15:39] Speaker B: What is it? I don't even know what a conduit bender is, but. Are you saying that's too. Too little? [01:15:42] Speaker C: That's the hunk of metal. [01:15:43] Speaker A: It's just. It's a curved piece of metal that you use to bend. [01:15:47] Speaker B: So it wouldn't be $38. Can't cost more than to bend that metal. [01:15:52] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:15:53] Speaker C: Was it $30 tops now or something like that? [01:15:56] Speaker A: $10 at the flea market. [01:15:57] Speaker C: Yeah, right. [01:15:58] Speaker A: $30 Home Depot. [01:16:00] Speaker C: Right. [01:16:00] Speaker B: Yeah. 238. Yeah, it was lost. [01:16:02] Speaker C: That's what I thought too. I thought, you're over. You're. I. I thought of people that overpay for their services. [01:16:07] Speaker A: Is he sponsored by Sears? [01:16:09] Speaker B: That's what I wanted. [01:16:10] Speaker C: Oh, yeah, right. [01:16:11] Speaker B: Must have been a spokesman for Sears. Jesus. He's plugging his out of it. [01:16:15] Speaker C: I wonder if he was devastated when Craftsman eventually went the way that it did with their poor quality. [01:16:20] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah, they. [01:16:22] Speaker A: What were the red hats in the audience? Obviously not maga, but what were they? [01:16:26] Speaker B: There was only two. There's two people sitting together. [01:16:28] Speaker C: I saw Tool Man. [01:16:30] Speaker B: I didn't see him throughout this. The theater. [01:16:34] Speaker C: Yeah, maybe. Maybe they were Curious George hats. Maybe. Maybe those people just got out of a Curious George. Maybe. [01:16:42] Speaker B: Maybe that's what it was. Yeah, I thought it was just those two people, but maybe there were more of them. He obviously had a following at this point. Right. Like probably the one that Puts him on the map or the big one for sure. I don't know where this originally aired. Was it hbo? [01:16:56] Speaker C: Showtime? [01:16:57] Speaker B: Showtime. Because he already had like catchphrases, obviously had the ooh and all that. But then like with the duct tape, if you can't fix it, then like they'd finish the duck it. [01:17:09] Speaker A: Yeah. Unless that was a. An ad campaign that duct tape ran at the time, so they. [01:17:16] Speaker B: Maybe. Maybe that's it too. What do you think about his attitude towards ladies? [01:17:24] Speaker A: I think he walked a good line. [01:17:28] Speaker B: Really? Do you think he walked a good line when he. When he was referencing his grandmother and he said that bitch, I hate her. [01:17:35] Speaker A: Yeah. I didn't like the use of the B word, but I never do. [01:17:37] Speaker C: Yeah. He also called his daughter the B word. [01:17:39] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:17:39] Speaker B: He called his six month old that little bitch from hell within the first 30 seconds. [01:17:43] Speaker C: That's a shock reaction. [01:17:44] Speaker A: But again, that was, to me, that was part of the whole swearing. Like he was randomly swearing. You're like, where did that come from? [01:17:50] Speaker C: That was right in the beginning. I thought, oh, are we up? Is this gonna be a half hour of this? But it was. [01:17:55] Speaker B: He degraded women throughout this thing. Really degraded. Even his impression of women was such a demeaning impression, you know, like it was Dice esque. [01:18:03] Speaker C: Yeah. [01:18:03] Speaker B: His treatment of women wasn't as overtly disgusting as Dice, but he. [01:18:08] Speaker C: But then he also. Then he trashed men at the same time. [01:18:11] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:18:11] Speaker B: I was gonna say, not really. [01:18:13] Speaker A: He had a balance. [01:18:14] Speaker B: He glorified them. [01:18:16] Speaker C: I think it's a very thin veil of glorification. I think the underlying, underlying messages that the men are the idiots that the ones he's talking about. [01:18:25] Speaker A: Because he was like, ah, women are always bitching. But then he said, but they do it because we are liars. [01:18:32] Speaker B: Yeah, I guess he walked that back a little bit. But how about when he said, men are pigs? Oh, yeah. Too bad we own everything. [01:18:40] Speaker C: I love that joke. [01:18:42] Speaker A: Yeah, it's a good one. [01:18:43] Speaker C: It's so good. [01:18:44] Speaker A: That's an acknowledgment of, you know, a sexist world. [01:18:49] Speaker C: Yeah. There's layers to it. There's subtlety, there's unsaddle. There's an unsaid punchline to that joke. Yeah, there is. [01:18:56] Speaker A: It's just maybe I think your little woke. Wokeism is looking for an outlet here, Bill. [01:19:01] Speaker B: How about when he said, I don't know, he's talking about like something somebody was wearing. He said, take that faggy little pattern. [01:19:08] Speaker C: That surprised me. [01:19:10] Speaker B: You guys seem to like that too, I guess. [01:19:12] Speaker A: No, he didn't like it, but that was an aberration that came from nowhere and then disappeared. [01:19:17] Speaker C: Yeah. [01:19:20] Speaker B: Yeah. How about. Did you know. Did you think at all when he was doing his, like, impression, when he's doing the lawn care thing, like it's lawn care season. It was like Putty. He was doing like a. Or maybe Putty from Seinfeld was doing a Tim Allen. [01:19:34] Speaker C: I don't. I don't know about that. [01:19:36] Speaker B: No, you didn't see that. You didn't get that? I did the thing he was best at, mugging. He's great at mugging. You know, like facial mugging, like in his. [01:19:48] Speaker A: His chimp, don't he. [01:19:51] Speaker B: Yeah, he's good at mugging. He's mugged in different ways other than the chimp, too, that I thought that he was good at that physical kind of comedy, that mugging. And if you like that kind of thing, which I know you don't, Mark. [01:20:04] Speaker A: No, I don't like mugging. [01:20:05] Speaker B: No, I know you don't like mugging. Well, how many times did he. Did he say he had, I think, three jokes where he's going to take the engine of a car and put it on a home appliance. [01:20:18] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:20:19] Speaker B: Take a 35 hemi and put that on that. That garbage disposal, but turn it into a wood chamber. Yeah. Take a Harley 6 cam brute. Put it on that. [01:20:30] Speaker C: He probably did it in this special as frequently he's. He made eight episodes of Home Improvement on that. You know, that was every episode he was putting an engine on something. [01:20:41] Speaker A: I don't remember a Home Improvement as engine. I know he was building a hot rod that gradually, I. It always seemed like there was some problem with the wife or the sons. [01:20:51] Speaker C: Yeah. [01:20:52] Speaker A: Wilson and said, I don't know what to do. Wilson said, do this and that. And he figured it out. That seemed to be the formula. [01:21:00] Speaker C: He was putting engines on things. [01:21:02] Speaker A: Was he? [01:21:02] Speaker C: Yeah, on his. On his ride on Lawnmower, he was [01:21:05] Speaker B: souping that up, putting a Mac engine on that seven cylinder. And all the sound effects is almost Michael Winslow. [01:21:13] Speaker C: That's how things would always go wrong in Tool Time, too. [01:21:15] Speaker B: Oh, really? Yeah. [01:21:17] Speaker C: Al would always be getting on his case because Tim would be putting an engine on some sort of spoon. [01:21:21] Speaker A: Yeah. Do you remember how, like, Tim would say something outrageous during the show and then Al would always go right to whatever. [01:21:31] Speaker B: Al was the voice of reason. [01:21:32] Speaker C: I don't think so. [01:21:33] Speaker A: Al had a catchphrase. [01:21:34] Speaker C: I don't think so, too. [01:21:36] Speaker A: Again, that's. And he would. What was Al's catchphrase. [01:21:41] Speaker B: I don't know. [01:21:42] Speaker C: It was the only one that watched [01:21:43] Speaker B: the piece of program. [01:21:46] Speaker A: Get out. You didn't watch? [01:21:47] Speaker B: I looked at it because I watched everything on tv, but I, you know, wasn't tuning in. [01:21:52] Speaker C: It was the best for, you know. It's the best show possible. [01:21:56] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:21:58] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:22:00] Speaker B: All right. Did you notice in the credits, I've never seen this in the credit. [01:22:05] Speaker C: Oh, what? The sloppy handwriting. [01:22:07] Speaker B: No. What? Oh, for the credit. [01:22:09] Speaker A: No, I know what you're gonna say. [01:22:11] Speaker B: What? [01:22:12] Speaker A: Well, you say. And then I'll say. [01:22:13] Speaker B: Well, you'll just say that just to make yourself sound. [01:22:15] Speaker C: Say at the same time [01:22:18] Speaker B: some of his ideas provided by Dennis Johnson. [01:22:24] Speaker C: Oh, so he had a ghostwriter. [01:22:27] Speaker B: Yeah. Dennis Johnson is the man behind. [01:22:30] Speaker C: Who's Dennis Johnson? [01:22:31] Speaker B: I don't know. He played for the Celtics. But I don't think it's the same Dennis. [01:22:34] Speaker C: Wow. He's a basketball player and a joke. [01:22:35] Speaker B: I think it was the same guy. [01:22:36] Speaker C: But double dribble. [01:22:38] Speaker B: You ever seen that? A comedian give credit for their jokes in the credits. [01:22:42] Speaker A: That's good. I felt that was a. A nice human touch. [01:22:47] Speaker B: I'll off. All right, let's get to the. [01:22:49] Speaker C: Yeah, let's do this. We're an hour and a half. [01:22:51] Speaker B: You're playing games over here with this. Just trying to intact. [01:22:54] Speaker C: He's trying to get us to go all the way to half past five. [01:22:56] Speaker B: Yeah. We're already at half five. Almost. [01:22:58] Speaker C: No, we're not. [01:22:59] Speaker B: We're at quarter five. [01:23:00] Speaker C: Yeah. [01:23:01] Speaker B: Recorder five. Quarter of. [01:23:03] Speaker C: That's half. Half five. [01:23:04] Speaker B: If you say quarter five, that could be quarter to five. [01:23:07] Speaker C: Yeah. [01:23:08] Speaker A: If I was gonna say quarter to five, I'd say quarter to five, but I was gonna say quarter past five. [01:23:12] Speaker B: I said quarter past five, but if you say. Why don't you say half past five? You say half five. [01:23:17] Speaker A: Yeah, [01:23:20] Speaker C: I want to say. I say half to five. [01:23:22] Speaker B: Half to five. [01:23:22] Speaker C: Yeah, yeah. [01:23:23] Speaker B: You don't say that. [01:23:24] Speaker A: I don't say two. [01:23:24] Speaker C: I don't subscribe. [01:23:27] Speaker B: Half past a monkey's ass. Quarter to his balls. [01:23:30] Speaker C: Yeah, I missed that one. [01:23:30] Speaker B: You remember that one? [01:23:31] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:23:31] Speaker C: That was a go. [01:23:32] Speaker B: What time is it? [01:23:32] Speaker C: Right. [01:23:34] Speaker B: Yeah. What if somebody would ask you what time is. He goes half past a monkey's ass. Quarter to his balls. [01:23:39] Speaker C: Yep. [01:23:40] Speaker B: Don't know why, but that's what we would say as kids. [01:23:44] Speaker A: Wow. The hours must have flown by. [01:23:46] Speaker C: Do you know what time it is when it's time to go to the dentist? What, 2:30? [01:23:51] Speaker B: I don't know. We're not doing these. All right. [01:23:53] Speaker C: What's this? What's the similarity? What's. What do 6am and a pig's tail have in common? They're too early. [01:24:02] Speaker B: Twirly. That's pretty good. All right, enough of that. Mark, out of how many do you give? Out of five. Oh, do you give this. Oh, that's kind of Sandlerish. [01:24:20] Speaker C: Yeah, I was thinking the same thing. [01:24:21] Speaker B: Maybe Sandler, when I was watching this. How many are given? Tim Allen and why? And you seem to like the program. You seem to like Tim. You don't have any problem with his misogyny or his degrading of women? Just like last week when you rated Dice rather highly or two weeks ago. [01:24:37] Speaker A: Well, I mean, one out of five. [01:24:40] Speaker B: Well, it's more than some people gave it on this program. [01:24:43] Speaker A: Yeah, that was a nice little switcheroo. Fell for the old switcheroo there. Hey, Christian. [01:24:49] Speaker B: The old Bly switcheroo. [01:24:53] Speaker A: I'm gonna just go three out of five on this. It's. It's functional. It's. It's not horrendous. It's nothing great. It's just sits in the middle. [01:25:07] Speaker C: Bill, you look. [01:25:07] Speaker A: No, you know what? I'm downgrading it to two. Because I. Now I think about it. [01:25:11] Speaker C: Because Bill was staring at the floor. [01:25:13] Speaker A: No, no, because now I think about it is a lot of things I hate in comedy is in this. So I hate the clinging to an identity, and I hate mogging and I hate just repetition. There's nothing clever in it. There's nothing clever. So I'm downgrading to a two. [01:25:33] Speaker C: All right, so Mark gives it a two. Bill? [01:25:35] Speaker B: Yeah, I, you know, I've had personal experience with Tim Allen. I don't know how much that colors my review here. I mean, I did, you know, kind of meet him one time and didn't. Wasn't good. And. But, you know, I recognize the, you know, Tim Allen's status in the comedy community. He's made more money than God with his shows, his movies. But this particular special, which I saw back in the day, and I think maybe I appreciate it more as a youth, now watching it as an adult, I find this to be the worst piece of shit I think I've ever seen this. The writing was terrible. The fucking, the mugging and the grunting throughout the treatment of women. I did not care for it all. This is one of the worst pieces of shit I've ever seen. I would say that not only that, it is an insult to me as a male that. That Tim Allen would. Would try to speak for Men in this way, right. That this is what we're like. I'm nothing like this idiot. This guy's a piece of. And he set the. The male race back 100 years with this special. [01:26:48] Speaker A: Why are you. Why are you pro women and yet detest the thought of them being on stage doing. [01:26:55] Speaker B: Say that. That's not. That's so not true. So not true. And I let you say it every week. [01:27:00] Speaker A: Absolutely. [01:27:01] Speaker B: You like test. No. [01:27:03] Speaker A: Of a female comedian. [01:27:04] Speaker B: Not at all. Not at all. And. [01:27:05] Speaker A: And that's a weird. [01:27:07] Speaker B: All right. I'm not even gonna. I'm not even gonna. I'm not gonna even acknowledge that. Not gonna even. What does it say? What do you say? [01:27:14] Speaker A: Christian's not acknowledging at this point. [01:27:16] Speaker B: I'm not even gonna. [01:27:17] Speaker C: No. I'm not trying to find a dignified. [01:27:20] Speaker B: That bullshit that you keep spouting about me being a nihilist and a woman hater. [01:27:25] Speaker A: Well, I guess you're picking the next special. So we'll see. See where it heads. [01:27:31] Speaker C: I give it a four. [01:27:33] Speaker B: Fuck off. [01:27:33] Speaker C: Tim Allen for mayor. I loved it. I was laughing the whole time. [01:27:36] Speaker B: You didn't laugh. [01:27:37] Speaker C: I did. I loved it. I thought it was great. I love the character he was setting up. Brings us eight full seasons of home improvement to come. Oh, entertainment for a lifetime. One of the best in the business to ever do it. Tim Allen, ladies and gentlemen. My favorite piece of. The best one that we've done all season. This is my favorite episode of the season. This is my favorite. [01:28:00] Speaker B: This is the first one of the season, isn't it? [01:28:01] Speaker C: I believe. Yeah. Well, what a coincidence. So who do we got next, Bill? [01:28:08] Speaker B: Next week will be. Well, here I'm going to qualify this. I did have a female picked. Nina Dicker, Tangerine Vagina. Came across her, looked very funny, wanted to know more. But I'm changing. We're not going to be watching her. [01:28:27] Speaker C: Why? [01:28:27] Speaker A: Because she's a woman? [01:28:28] Speaker C: Yeah. [01:28:29] Speaker B: Nope. Because this week, as previously mentioned on this program, Netflix released the Judd apatow documentary Norm MacDonald, the Tale of Norm MacDonald. [01:28:41] Speaker C: So we're gonna watch a documentary? [01:28:42] Speaker B: That's right. [01:28:43] Speaker A: I thought we already did a Norm special. [01:28:44] Speaker C: We did. [01:28:45] Speaker B: We did a NORM standup special. But I'm changing the format of this program. I'm saying we're going to watch a documentary about a comedian instead of a stand up special. I think it'll be easier to talk about and maybe open the door to reviewing sitcoms, comedy, movies, other things that are not just stand up specials. Do you accept or not? Sure what the hell will you allow? It will be the first thing that we've reviewed that's not a podcast. [01:29:12] Speaker A: We just. We're along for the ride. [01:29:14] Speaker B: Forget that. We're gonna do Nina Dicker Tangerine Vagina. But I would also like. [01:29:20] Speaker A: Or get off the pot. Which one is it? [01:29:22] Speaker B: It's Nina Dicker Tangerine Vagina. But I would like you to watch Norm MacDonald's documentary this week so we can also talk about that. [01:29:29] Speaker C: Yeah, I'll watch it. [01:29:31] Speaker B: Because I, I'm not. I, I don't want to. We've only ever done stand up comedy specials. I think we have to do that. But I want to talk about those. [01:29:41] Speaker C: So we're watching Tangerine Vagina by Nina Dicker. [01:29:43] Speaker B: How long Tangerine Vagina. [01:29:45] Speaker A: Nina, how long is it? [01:29:46] Speaker B: Is the documentary? [01:29:47] Speaker A: How long is the doc? [01:29:48] Speaker B: I don't know. [01:29:49] Speaker A: Probably an hour and a half. How long's the vagina? If it's more than an hour, I am gonna. I'm gonna kick off. [01:29:58] Speaker B: Just watch Tangerine Vagina. And if you have any time you and the missus want to watch Norm MacDonald's tale of Norm MacDonald by Judd Apatow, you can do that as well. But I'm gonna be watching both and I'm very excited. [01:30:10] Speaker C: All right. [01:30:10] Speaker B: Half five. This peace frog. I used to live in England. I used to shop at Tesco's and buy meal deals. Tesco's meal deals. And I used to say go Tesco's instead of go to Tesco's. [01:30:34] Speaker A: What is this? [01:30:35] Speaker B: I used to spend late nights at school. [01:30:36] Speaker A: Polite. [01:30:37] Speaker B: I'm mute British talk British music. I used to live in England. I used to go to the Jack. [01:30:48] Speaker C: Mato as honest one.