Review: Road Work, Dave Attell

[00:00:08] Speaker A: I was gonna say my missus had her wallet and passport lifted in Copenhagen, so I had the full story. [00:00:16] Speaker B: Oh. [00:00:17] Speaker A: But she got it all sorted out. She's got a temporary passport and she's just carrying on as per. [00:00:23] Speaker B: Very stressful, though. [00:00:25] Speaker A: Yeah. She said she didn't cry, she didn't panic. She just was like, okay, what's going to happen then? So this is in Parrot, Paraguay. She was in Copenhagen. That's where the theft happened. Then they went to Paris and they had to get, like, a temporary one in Paris and now they're in Strasbourg. [00:00:42] Speaker B: How long did it take her to get the temporary? Not today. [00:00:45] Speaker A: No, no, she said, yeah, it was, like, quicker than getting it right. Yeah, yeah. No, no faffing. [00:00:51] Speaker B: They said, come in tomorrow and get one. [00:00:52] Speaker C: Faffing. [00:00:53] Speaker B: Yeah, no faffing. [00:00:54] Speaker C: What's faffing? [00:00:55] Speaker A: Faffing about? [00:00:56] Speaker B: Just. Just lazing about and dickering around. Dickering, yeah. When I was in high school, we went to London for the World Schools Debate Championship. I don't know if you were there, if we ever talked about this. [00:01:07] Speaker A: Probably did, no, you mentioned it. [00:01:09] Speaker B: Yeah. I was one of the US representatives for the debate team. As you know, I was a top debater, but I lost my passport while there in London as a high schooler. Very stressful. The debate teacher's wife had to accompany me to the embassy and do the whole bit and, you know, somehow verify it and give me a temporary. [00:01:32] Speaker A: But, yeah, I lost a passport in England and got into America just with my green card. [00:01:37] Speaker B: They didn't look at the passport when he came in? [00:01:39] Speaker A: No. We were staggering. [00:01:41] Speaker B: Practice or this guy fuck up? [00:01:43] Speaker A: No, no, I went to Heathrow because I thought, well, that was the last time I seen it. Maybe I dropped it at Heathrow and it's in the lost property there, you know. So I said to Heather, well, I'll come down with you to Heathrow. Might as well see if it's, you know, been found there. So it hadn't. So I said, went to the bloke in American Airlines and he's like, well, have you got your green card? I'm like, yeah. He goes, well, we'll fly you on that, then. And he. [00:02:12] Speaker B: What year was this? 1983. [00:02:14] Speaker A: No, it was maybe just year before lockdown. [00:02:19] Speaker B: Wow. [00:02:20] Speaker A: So we were like, wow, that's a bit of a. A shocker. And he's like, yeah, we just call ahead to o' Hare and tell him this chap's coming in, but he's not going to have a passport. But it's Been cleared at this end. And I thought, that's where it goes tits up when I get to o' Hare and I go, no one called us. [00:02:38] Speaker B: Yep. And then. Then it's like Midnight Express, you know, they body search, you get something on you and you end up in a prison. [00:02:46] Speaker A: No, no, I ended up in the naughty boys section in o'. Hare, really. Sitting with some, you know, all the shady looking people who've been fished out of the line. And after five minutes they were like, yep, yep, we got the clearance. Off you go then. I just got a new passport sent through the mail. [00:03:05] Speaker B: I'd like you to lose a passport, I would think. [00:03:07] Speaker A: Yeah. You know where the bastard was? [00:03:09] Speaker B: In your front pocket? [00:03:11] Speaker A: No, it had fallen down the recliner that I was sitting on in my sister's house. And when. When they got rid of the recliner, she sent me a picture. You'll never guess what it was like later. Yeah. Like, you know, three or four years later, she's like, you'll never guess what fell out of the sofa when we moved it. [00:03:28] Speaker B: That sofa eats up a lot of stuff. [00:03:30] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:03:30] Speaker C: And it's been flying around on your passport. [00:03:32] Speaker A: It's. Yeah. I was in line one time when they fished this young, Young Irish. Irish, I'll say Irish guy out of the line because he just didn't have any answers. They're like, well, what are you doing? He's like, just visiting. Well, what hotel? [00:03:53] Speaker B: He didn't have a passport or he just didn't have. [00:03:55] Speaker A: No, he had a passport. He just didn't have, like. [00:03:56] Speaker C: You got to answer the questions. [00:03:58] Speaker A: You got to know, okay, here's where I'm staying. But it's like, no, you're disappearing. [00:04:02] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:04:03] Speaker A: And he. They just fished him out. [00:04:05] Speaker C: It's too bad they don't let you just do that. Just disappear if you want to. Should be able to. [00:04:10] Speaker B: What do you mean, disappear? [00:04:11] Speaker C: Yeah, just. I don't know, just show up in some country, be somebody else. What do they care? [00:04:16] Speaker B: Yeah. I don't know. Yeah, it would be nice. [00:04:18] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:04:19] Speaker B: Roam around the country as long as [00:04:20] Speaker C: you're contributing to the economy and. Yeah. As long as you're not some scoff law. It's out there causing trouble. [00:04:26] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:04:27] Speaker C: You know, just let me disappear over here. [00:04:29] Speaker A: It's like John Lennon said, imagine there's no countries. You just go wherever you want. Deep. [00:04:35] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:04:35] Speaker A: Yeah, we've taken this deep because I am anti. You know, Nash, we've talked about this before. Nationalism is very seductive. Gives you a sense of belonging, blah, blah, blah. Maybe I'm not the dick everyone thinks I am, but it's also complete bullshit. [00:04:51] Speaker C: I was just talking to Alberto about this on Sunday. We were wondering if in our lifetimes, if we will see the borders start to disappear between countries and people start to realize, okay, when we made countries, the world was a bigger place than it is now. Now we understand it's not that big. You know? [00:05:07] Speaker B: Yeah, we. [00:05:07] Speaker C: We can all just be same thing. When I was filling out my passport. I don't want to sound like John Lennon over here, but. Same thing. When I was filling out my passport and I was going through all these. The information from my most recent one. I'm going through all this trouble to get. I'm like, okay, I'm just. I'm standing on this rock over here. I can't just go stand on that rock over there. What do you care? What, like, what's none of your business. I'm gonna go over there now. You're gonna eat that potato. Speaking of Irish people. [00:05:30] Speaker B: It's a kiwi. [00:05:31] Speaker A: Have you. You've got the name. Have you ever looked into trying to get a European? No. Well, you. You weren't because. [00:05:39] Speaker C: What do you mean? [00:05:40] Speaker A: Yeah, you hate anything that is an [00:05:41] Speaker C: American of you try to get a European passport. My sister, the one that calls into this show, her and I, for years now, we've been trying to get our dual citizenship to Ireland. We can, because my grandma is from Ireland. She was born there. [00:05:53] Speaker A: You go get it. [00:05:54] Speaker C: Yeah, I know. The thing is, you need all. [00:05:56] Speaker A: Why? [00:05:57] Speaker B: Because of the apocalypse. [00:05:58] Speaker C: Yeah. Well, there's no reason not to have it, first of all. But also, it could really come in handy. It's the paperwork that's. They don't make it easy. It's not easy, Especially. My grandma lives in North Carolina. She's a hundred years old. She doesn't want to give her papers up for too long in case she dies and she needs them. It's a whole pain in the butt. [00:06:16] Speaker A: It's gonna be easy to do when she's alive and kicking. [00:06:19] Speaker C: Right. Because my other. My other sister tried to do it one time and she ran into some complications. Because my grandma's got two different birthdays because she was born in one month, but it was a bad winter in Ireland, and the place that you register your babies was too far away, so her mom couldn't make it over there until the following month. This is in, like, 1920 and in, like, the middle of, you know, rural. Rural Ireland. [00:06:42] Speaker A: Rural. [00:06:43] Speaker C: Yeah. And then. So she's got two different birthdays not only that, but I think like something happened. Where? So my grandpa, he died forever ago, but he, like something happened with the last name too. Like he never declared her to be taking his last name or something weird like that. Just enough for them to be like, [00:06:59] Speaker B: she was a hoe. [00:07:01] Speaker C: Just enough for them to be like, this is not going to be easy for you. And enough for us to be like, we'll get back to it. And enough for five years to go by before you do. [00:07:08] Speaker B: Yeah, what is anything easy, really? Right. When's the last time you walked out of somewhere? [00:07:15] Speaker C: I was like, I had an easy. I. I had an easy thing happen to me today. My bike tire, as you know, was stolen on Sunday while locked out. It was like two o' clock in the afternoon in a nice neighborhood, outside of a church. [00:07:27] Speaker B: While the Patriots were laying a beating on the Bills. [00:07:30] Speaker C: Yes. While the Patriots were. [00:07:31] Speaker A: Tire or the wheel? [00:07:32] Speaker C: The whole wheel. The entire back wheel. Yep. And you know, at first it was like, okay, when something like that happens, you just go, okay, fine, the tire's gone. I'm getting a new tire. And then I remembered that I had one in a closet at home. I walked down the bike lane a couple hours ago and they threw it on there and everything worked out. $15 out the door. That was easy. [00:07:52] Speaker B: You had the wheel all put together. Why now I'm not questioning your handiness. Why did you need another outfit to put it on for you? [00:08:00] Speaker C: I didn't have the bolts that were necessary to put it on. That was one now. Yes. I could have just gone and gotten some bolts. I couldn't remember because that, that rear wheel, the spare one, has been in my closet for five plus years. I couldn't remember if the spokes were true, if it, if it was safe, if it stopped. [00:08:19] Speaker B: Spokes are true. [00:08:20] Speaker C: You need the spokes to be true. [00:08:23] Speaker B: What does that mean? [00:08:23] Speaker C: It means they can't lie to you about where you're going. [00:08:26] Speaker B: Mean you can't have any broken spokes. [00:08:27] Speaker C: No, they just have to be all so. So it spins. [00:08:30] Speaker A: Do you know? [00:08:31] Speaker C: Yeah, you have to. Every little one. And I didn't want to take all the time to do that. So I figure I'll just take it to bike lane and I trust them to tell me, yeah, this is safe. You can throw it. [00:08:37] Speaker B: How much that cost? [00:08:38] Speaker C: $15. [00:08:39] Speaker B: That's it. [00:08:40] Speaker C: The whole thing out the door. [00:08:41] Speaker B: Because they didn't need any parts. [00:08:42] Speaker A: Should have got. Shouldn't got his. Should have got his handyman to drive in from the burbs. Yeah, charge you 200 bucks for 40. 40 minutes. [00:08:51] Speaker C: I thought about it, but I couldn't find his number. [00:08:53] Speaker A: Yeah, what's his name? Rusnik. That's it. [00:08:56] Speaker B: Yeah, Vladimir Rusnik. [00:08:58] Speaker C: It's a real ruse. [00:08:59] Speaker B: Yeah, listen, I told you he would have worked for another 55 minutes and charged me the same. [00:09:06] Speaker A: I didn't know spoke key. I mean, if you got a. It's amazing how easy it is to true up a wheel. [00:09:13] Speaker B: Yeah, see, I don't even know what that means, but I want to learn and I'm thinking about taking a bike maintenance class. I rode my bike today. [00:09:20] Speaker C: What do you mean? Just YouTube. Just look at YouTube anytime you need to fix something. [00:09:22] Speaker A: No, I want to take a good sleeves up. [00:09:25] Speaker C: You just want to spend money. [00:09:26] Speaker A: What do you want to know? [00:09:27] Speaker B: Just want to know how the. How it all works and how to take stuff, how to fix this. I had to. [00:09:31] Speaker C: You can look at it. [00:09:32] Speaker B: I had a flat tire, I had to pay 58. [00:09:34] Speaker C: What? [00:09:35] Speaker A: Jesus Christ. [00:09:36] Speaker B: They saw you coming. [00:09:37] Speaker C: They're like, oh, there's that Rusnick guy. [00:09:40] Speaker A: Did you go to that place on Roscoe? That's like 18. [00:09:45] Speaker B: I was like, how much is a tire? They're like 20 bucks or something. Like, ah, that's not bad. And then the tube, that's another 12, 15. And then 18 to put it on. [00:09:53] Speaker A: Oh, you had a tire. [00:09:55] Speaker C: The wheel was included. [00:09:57] Speaker B: I had the wheel, I had the. [00:10:00] Speaker A: Let's be close. Get our nomenclature right. The wheel is the hub and the spokes in there. The tire is the rubbery bit and the tube is the other rubbery bit is the inside. [00:10:11] Speaker B: Why can't they just spray shit inside it like they do? When you have a car tire that breaks or gets a hole, they can, [00:10:16] Speaker C: but they wanted your $58 instead. [00:10:18] Speaker A: Because it takes two fucking minutes to change a broken. I remember the only time my dad ever looked at me with complete disgust is when I was a kid and I said I had a flat tire. And I said, I don't know how to change it. And he just looked at me and went, I could build a bicycle when I was your age. [00:10:37] Speaker C: How old are you when you didn't know how to change a flat tire? [00:10:39] Speaker A: You know, like 12, 13. [00:10:41] Speaker B: It was a little old to not know how. I still don't. You're a. Well, I want to get there. I want to get to be able to put together bikes, you know, know how all the parts work. I just want to know. And I figure a car is too complicated. I'll start with a Bike. I'm gonna learn how to bike, how it all works, how repair it. I want to be skilled at a bike. [00:11:02] Speaker C: YouTube is really to go. [00:11:04] Speaker A: Yeah, I don't. [00:11:04] Speaker C: Learn your own leisure. [00:11:05] Speaker B: What now? What if I paid you to teach me? You don't want to seem. You don't seem to want to work with me on any level, on anything. [00:11:12] Speaker A: Because you're a button pushing. [00:11:15] Speaker B: Shut up. It's not true. [00:11:18] Speaker A: I can show you how to change a bleeding inner tube and I want [00:11:22] Speaker B: you to teach me about bikes. [00:11:25] Speaker A: That's really all there is, is a frame and two wheels. [00:11:28] Speaker B: What about the gears? What about a derailleur? About how to put the brakes on and chip. Okay, all that stuff, how to clean the parts. [00:11:35] Speaker A: All right? [00:11:35] Speaker C: Shifting how many. [00:11:38] Speaker B: The chain and the. [00:11:39] Speaker C: How many speeds is your bike. [00:11:41] Speaker B: None. [00:11:42] Speaker C: It's just the one. You don't have a derailleur. [00:11:44] Speaker A: See, I was gonna say. No, I'm talking about gears, but I [00:11:47] Speaker B: want to learn those bikes too. [00:11:49] Speaker A: All right, well, we'll do it then. [00:11:51] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:11:51] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:11:52] Speaker B: How long will it take for you to teach me all about bikes? [00:11:54] Speaker C: How fast can you learn? [00:11:55] Speaker A: Yeah. Couple of hours. Are you going to be dicking around and being annoying the whole time? He's going to head down, learn. [00:12:02] Speaker B: At what point does it. What does a guy have to do to. To change another guy's opinion of him, right? You have this opinion of me from when I was 22 years old, okay? I'm sitting here 51 years old. We've known each other a lifetime. Everything you say about me is based on that 22 year old and not me. Now, have I not, over the past few years, shown you I'm a different man? [00:12:25] Speaker C: Has he changed? [00:12:26] Speaker A: I mean, you don't keep talking about Lou Baga's ass all the time, I'll give you that. [00:12:31] Speaker B: Well, give me a stage and a microphone. [00:12:34] Speaker C: Give him a second real quick. [00:12:37] Speaker A: All right, we'll do it. I'll set it up. Set it up. [00:12:41] Speaker B: That'd be awesome. Thanks. [00:12:42] Speaker C: I'm gonna have to put you on microphone timeout if you keep eating that keyboard that way. [00:12:47] Speaker B: Sorry. Do you ever eat a kiwi like this? [00:12:49] Speaker A: I've never seen anyone. [00:12:50] Speaker C: No, I've never seen this in my life. [00:12:52] Speaker B: You just eat it like an apple. [00:12:53] Speaker C: It looks like a boat. [00:12:54] Speaker A: I've never seen a full Kiwi except in the bloody, you know. [00:12:58] Speaker B: Really? [00:12:58] Speaker A: You always just see the little wanky slices that are garnishing things. [00:13:01] Speaker C: Do you ever buy kiwis that eat at home then? [00:13:03] Speaker A: No, they're Creepy. [00:13:06] Speaker C: They go bad real fast. [00:13:07] Speaker B: Why are they creepy? [00:13:09] Speaker A: They star when they look like something. [00:13:12] Speaker B: What does a kiwi look like to you? It's gone now. It's half gone now. But what did it look like? [00:13:17] Speaker C: A potato? [00:13:18] Speaker B: Yeah. Anything else? [00:13:21] Speaker A: Letting me say a testicle. [00:13:22] Speaker B: Yes, it looks exactly like a testicle. [00:13:24] Speaker A: Your testicles look like kiwi. [00:13:27] Speaker B: Both of mine combined would be the size of this kiwi. But when they're down, most of the time they're up in the attic looking for something. [00:13:36] Speaker C: Rummaging through boxes. [00:13:37] Speaker B: Rummaging, rummaging up. [00:13:39] Speaker C: There are kiwis in season right now? [00:13:43] Speaker B: No, I don't think they're ever in season. [00:13:46] Speaker C: Does it matter anymore? It feels like you just get whatever. Like any fruit or whatever, they just pump it full of chemicals and it's there all the time. There's no in or out of season. [00:13:54] Speaker B: No. [00:13:55] Speaker C: Yeah, it's not. That's not good though. It's not a good thing. We know that. [00:13:58] Speaker B: It's not good for us. [00:13:58] Speaker C: No. [00:13:59] Speaker B: Is a kiwi from New Zealand? [00:14:01] Speaker C: Yes. That's. So is the bird. [00:14:03] Speaker B: Both the bird and the fruit are from New Zealand. [00:14:05] Speaker C: I know about that. And they named. [00:14:07] Speaker B: They. [00:14:07] Speaker C: They're both named at the same time because the bird carries the fruit around by its tusk. [00:14:12] Speaker B: This is like that. That money squares, you know when the person gives an answer and then the contestant has to guess whether he's actually knows what he's talking about. [00:14:21] Speaker C: Yeah. What do you think? Am I correct on this? [00:14:23] Speaker B: I think you're wrong. Yeah. [00:14:26] Speaker A: Not a lot of kiwis left because some asshole introduced weasels to in New Zealand and they killed all the. All the birds in New Zealand are flightless. Fun fact. Some asshole lets a weasel go and it's a massacre. [00:14:40] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:14:41] Speaker C: My grandma had told me invasive species. My grandma had told me when I was a kid that dodo birds were still around when she was a kid. And I brought that up to somebody recently and they're like dodo birds went out of. They went extinct like the 1800s. Yeah. [00:14:54] Speaker B: Like the dodo. Yeah, it went the way of the dodo. [00:14:56] Speaker C: That's the expression. [00:14:57] Speaker A: Well, talking of wasn't true word meanings, I bought my missus one of these calendars, you know, a challenge a day. So choose the best definition for a whiffler. Is it A, somebody who walks in front of you through a crowd. B, a small covering. C, friendly. You choose first. [00:15:22] Speaker B: Well, first of all, I can see the paper in your hand and it's not. I don't know if I'M being asked this because of my association with wiffle baller. Yeah, it's spelled differently with the H. He's looking down on his shirt. Compare. Yeah. So that's a different meaning, obviously, based on the choices you gave as well. I'm gonna say it's a friendly. [00:15:41] Speaker A: It means friendly. [00:15:42] Speaker B: Whoo. [00:15:43] Speaker A: No, I'm sad yet. [00:15:45] Speaker B: Oh, I thought you did say. [00:15:46] Speaker C: It did sound like it though, didn't it? I thought maybe I was getting skipped on my guess. I'm going to be a small covering. [00:15:54] Speaker A: And you're both wrong. It's a. It's somebody who walks in front of you through a crowd. [00:16:00] Speaker C: So somebody that you're drafting from the [00:16:02] Speaker B: viz or something like. [00:16:03] Speaker A: No, this is the word. A day thing. [00:16:05] Speaker B: You ought to get your. You ought to talk to viz and get a word of the day calendar off, you know, from viz. [00:16:11] Speaker A: True. [00:16:11] Speaker B: Be nice. Right? Wouldn't that. [00:16:13] Speaker C: You can put it up on the wall. [00:16:14] Speaker A: Right. Have you heard of the expression. What was it? Well end. [00:16:22] Speaker B: Many times. He's a bell end. [00:16:23] Speaker A: So can you guess what a well end is? [00:16:27] Speaker B: Well, if a bell end is. Is a penis head. [00:16:30] Speaker A: Right. So I'll give you a clue because it looks like a derivative of Paul. It's a mashup of Bellend and Paul Weller. [00:16:40] Speaker B: Paul Weller from RoboCop. That's Peter Weller. [00:16:44] Speaker A: Paul Weller. Who's Paul Weller? The lead singer of no clue. [00:16:47] Speaker B: The Romantics. [00:16:48] Speaker A: The gem. [00:16:49] Speaker B: Of course. Who the fuck would know that? [00:16:53] Speaker C: I've never heard of that. [00:16:54] Speaker A: Who would know who the lead singer is? Probably the second or third greatest British band ever. [00:17:00] Speaker B: Yeah, I think sometimes you forget when you're in here that we're not from Great Britain. [00:17:04] Speaker C: I don't even know who that is. [00:17:05] Speaker A: Well, a well end is. Paul Weller is famous for having these, like, retro mod haircuts that are like, you know, spiky and weird, have a long fringe but a short. So a well end means you have a ridiculous haircut. Oh, you're a well end. [00:17:21] Speaker C: Why did you bring that up? [00:17:23] Speaker A: Cuz Viz coined the term well end. No, well end. [00:17:28] Speaker B: Oh, they did that? Seems like it's out of viz's wheelhouse. [00:17:31] Speaker A: No, that's Ryan. This is wheel. Bell. A bell end that's been around for centuries. [00:17:35] Speaker B: But well end has nothing to do with sex. [00:17:38] Speaker A: No, we're getting bogged down here. [00:17:41] Speaker B: You stop. Just let it flow. [00:17:45] Speaker C: Let it flow like the water from a well. [00:17:47] Speaker A: Jesus Christ. You're like a hog over there. Aren't you meant to hear how Is it good? [00:17:54] Speaker C: He's eating a cherry pie. What is it? [00:17:59] Speaker A: This is my mini cherry pie. Cool drink of water. Something else. Something. Do it. Us? [00:18:16] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:18:17] Speaker A: Now. Now. Do it as Sling Blade. [00:18:22] Speaker B: Wait, over the weekend, I don't know where, how I came across it. I saw a video, a video of Billy Bob Thornton on the Actor Studio and James Lipton asking him to do, like, Sling Blade impressions. It was amazing. [00:18:37] Speaker C: He did it. [00:18:37] Speaker B: Yeah. He's like, you gotta get your jar. It just comes. I get. I like a cherry pie. I never much want with one, I guess. Okay, you want to know what I'm doing in here? [00:18:51] Speaker A: Do you think Angelina Jolie ever said to Billy Bob, talk to me, like, get me horny, do me like Carl. [00:19:01] Speaker B: She doesn't seem to have a great sense of humor. [00:19:04] Speaker C: Angelina Jolie? [00:19:05] Speaker B: No. [00:19:05] Speaker C: Why Angelina Jolie? Yeah. I don't know anything about her. I know that she Tomb Raider. Know she adopted a lot of people. [00:19:15] Speaker A: Yeah. Who else did Billy Bob had? He had a few celeb gals. Yeah. [00:19:20] Speaker B: He had Jolie. And they wore the blood around the neck and all that. [00:19:23] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:19:24] Speaker C: That's all right. [00:19:25] Speaker B: I like Billy Bob. He must be hurting for money, though, because he's popping up in all kinds of T mobile. He's a T mobile. [00:19:31] Speaker A: He's all over the World Cup. [00:19:33] Speaker B: Yeah, the World Cup. Billy Bob. I don't see him in the theater, though, in the films. I haven't seen him. [00:19:39] Speaker C: Yeah. What's he been in lately? [00:19:41] Speaker B: Maybe he doesn't get work. [00:19:42] Speaker C: Yeah. Did he. Does something happen to him? [00:19:45] Speaker B: I don't know. [00:19:45] Speaker C: Did he get canceled? Maybe not canceled, but because he's in commercials. But something like that in Hollywood. [00:19:51] Speaker B: I don't know. [00:19:52] Speaker C: Maybe he's got too many names. Well, he said, listen, there's too many. [00:19:55] Speaker B: All right, listen, last call on those Tootsie Pops and taking them back home today. [00:19:59] Speaker C: Yeah, take them. Nobody's gonna want them because you know what? [00:20:02] Speaker B: I brought them. And then I realized I could have given those out for Halloween. So those are going in the Halloween. [00:20:07] Speaker C: Oh, yeah. Multiple occasions I've walked into this room, thought, I want to. I wanted one of those Tootsie Pops, and picked one up and walked out of the room and realized, I don't want this at all, and returned it. [00:20:19] Speaker B: Okay. All right. Well, I'm. I've been really looking forward to the show because I was at a. I was at a party this weekend, listener party with some listeners, and we're having a nice time, you know, and then one listener shows up to the show. We'd been drinking all day. Shows up with his wife. Right. And he's been drinking heavily. And he comes in and sees me and immediately starts to attack me. And specifically this podcast. He's a longtime listener and drinker. Yes. And day drinker. And he assailed me and assailed this podcast because he had. He'd been in his cups and he had this liquid courage. [00:21:10] Speaker C: Yeah. What did he have to say? [00:21:12] Speaker B: Well, he said, this show's not doing well. It's not going well. And he said, what's one thing that's awful is the gifts. He said, nobody gives a fuck about the gifts you get. So he's attacking me, and I'm like. Like, you know, sitting next to his wife, and I'm, like, going to pieces. I could say nothing. [00:21:34] Speaker C: Right. [00:21:35] Speaker B: And everything he said was true. He's right. No more of these gifts. If you brought a gift, cram it up your ass. [00:21:41] Speaker C: I didn't have time to get a gift. No more gifts. [00:21:43] Speaker A: No, I got gifts. [00:21:44] Speaker B: There's no more gifts. [00:21:45] Speaker A: We're doing gifts. [00:21:47] Speaker B: There's no. People don't want to hear the gifts. They don't care that you us giving each other trinkets. [00:21:52] Speaker A: Well, I loaded up on gifts of the flea. [00:21:55] Speaker B: You ended up leaving without me. [00:21:56] Speaker A: Yeah, because you were golfing. [00:21:58] Speaker B: No, I told you I was done when I was. About yesterday or my this weekend. I thought it wasn't for another week or two. [00:22:08] Speaker A: Anyway, let me get my gifts out. [00:22:11] Speaker B: Nobody wants these gifts. [00:22:13] Speaker C: Speaking of gifts, nobody said anything about the. My hilarious gif in our group chat. [00:22:18] Speaker B: I didn't get it. [00:22:19] Speaker C: I don't get it either. [00:22:20] Speaker B: Gross. [00:22:21] Speaker C: It was gross. [00:22:22] Speaker B: Well, it's nice to have you being able to text. I. You don't know what it's like to be, you know, called out, like, hey, are you not getting any of these texts from the past couple days? Like, no more with this flip phone? [00:22:33] Speaker C: What are you talking about? I haven't been on the flip phone. [00:22:34] Speaker B: You said that's why I didn't get the text. [00:22:36] Speaker C: I didn't get the text. Not because of you. Yeah, I gotta. I gotta. This is it. All right, listen, I gotta be off [00:22:42] Speaker B: the flip for the gifts. [00:22:43] Speaker A: Is it begin. [00:22:44] Speaker B: It's not. [00:22:45] Speaker A: Okay, so here's a gift. I know how disappointed you were two weeks ago when you missed out on a bobblehead. So I got a bobblehead of Sergey Bobrovsky, Oskar Dansk Journeyman goaltender of the ahl. This is a Chicago Wolves one. He's Swedish. So there you go. There's a thing. [00:23:07] Speaker B: Thank you. [00:23:07] Speaker A: And then, because I was on a bobblehead purge, I got one of Saya Suzuki for Christian. [00:23:17] Speaker C: All right. Are you shitting me? [00:23:19] Speaker B: That's the one that I want. [00:23:19] Speaker C: My favorite cub. I'm so excited. [00:23:22] Speaker A: No, he said it. [00:23:22] Speaker C: Yeah, it was my favorite coat. [00:23:24] Speaker B: You're joking. You're gonna give him this? [00:23:25] Speaker C: No, no. [00:23:26] Speaker B: Come on. That's the one I. I couldn't get. The one my kid called in about [00:23:32] Speaker A: his dogs. [00:23:33] Speaker B: That's even nicer. Come on. [00:23:35] Speaker C: He's my favorite because I learned by the Suzuki method to play the piano. [00:23:38] Speaker B: Come on. You set this up. This is. [00:23:40] Speaker C: Oh, look at this. He's got this. This is great. [00:23:43] Speaker B: There's no name. I don't even know who the it is. [00:23:45] Speaker C: I can't wait to display this next to Billy Joel. [00:23:47] Speaker B: And I'm going to throw this on the ground. [00:23:51] Speaker C: And the plant that grows the plant, also. A goalie. Yeah, but I already have a goalie. That's why Mark can't give me that one. [00:23:57] Speaker A: Yeah, I figured you'd both appreciate those more. [00:24:00] Speaker C: And what do I like more than Seiya Suzuki? Is that how you say it? [00:24:03] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:24:04] Speaker C: Seiya Suzuki and his two little dogs. [00:24:05] Speaker A: Two dogs, Luka. [00:24:07] Speaker C: And I'm going to cherish this forever, Mark. Thank you. [00:24:09] Speaker B: I didn't even know about that one, to be honest. [00:24:11] Speaker C: Yeah. This is a real treasure. [00:24:13] Speaker B: The one they had this year. Tell me if you think this is inappropriate. They had him in a batting pose, but with a samurai sword. Slicing a ball in half. That seems like a racial stereotype. Made him into a samurai. [00:24:24] Speaker A: Maybe he approved it. [00:24:25] Speaker B: I mean, he must have approved it. [00:24:27] Speaker C: He's Japanese, right? Some samurais are Japanese. [00:24:30] Speaker A: Which bubble heads do you have? [00:24:33] Speaker B: Well, you should be proud of that. I don't have that one over there. Yeah, I don't have this Oscar either, but I also don't want it. I got no. No cause for that. [00:24:43] Speaker C: You know who does have this one? The seaman over here. [00:24:46] Speaker B: Seaman. The seaman growneth. The B man grown it as well. I'm glad this is the last of the gifts. [00:24:56] Speaker A: No, I got. I got another three weeks. [00:24:59] Speaker B: I will walk out of the studio if you start getting a whole season. The listeners think this is trash, and they're right. It's. Nobody wants to listen to us. I know, but it's. [00:25:09] Speaker C: If you get. [00:25:09] Speaker B: That was a gimmick, and now we don't. [00:25:10] Speaker C: We do it every week. If you get to eat on the microphone, Mark gets to give gifts. That's the rule. [00:25:14] Speaker B: I will not bring Any more gifts? I will give you guys gifts, but I will not be doing it on the air. [00:25:18] Speaker C: Yeah, but we're talking about food. [00:25:20] Speaker B: Give gift. Nobody wants to hear it said. The format has grown tiresome, and God damn if he's not right. The format we're doing, it's getting tired. Right? The gifts, the same treacle we open up with. We've got to shake this show up. [00:25:34] Speaker A: I did it with McTender. [00:25:37] Speaker C: You have a lot of opinions, but no ideas. [00:25:39] Speaker B: I have no ideas. Okay, well, we need to have meetings. We have to have meetings. Off air meetings, production meetings, and talk about stuff. [00:25:47] Speaker C: This show already takes up enough of my time throughout the week. [00:25:50] Speaker B: Come on. It wouldn't take. It wouldn't be a lot. Or we could have the meetings on air. [00:25:54] Speaker C: Why don't you do it right now? [00:25:55] Speaker A: Why don't you just do what I do and walk in with an idea and cram it down everyone's pie hole? [00:25:59] Speaker C: Yeah, pie hole. Right. Mini pie hole. [00:26:03] Speaker B: So he said that was bad. And then he also said that. And this one I don't understand. And I. [00:26:08] Speaker C: What's this car name, by the way? [00:26:10] Speaker B: His name is Alex Cormos. [00:26:13] Speaker A: The names come up before his name's come up. [00:26:15] Speaker B: And I've given him shout outs. He's, you know. [00:26:17] Speaker C: Is he getting help for his alcoholism? [00:26:19] Speaker B: He did apologize the next day, saying that he was aggressive and he went too far. [00:26:24] Speaker C: Did he do that text form? [00:26:26] Speaker B: He really. Do I have a text for him? [00:26:28] Speaker C: Did he? Yeah. No. Did he text that to you? [00:26:30] Speaker B: Yes. [00:26:31] Speaker C: Can I see it? [00:26:32] Speaker A: What if I give you a gift to give to him? [00:26:35] Speaker B: Sure. [00:26:36] Speaker A: Off air, smooth the walls. [00:26:37] Speaker B: Well, maybe that's a good idea, but it would need to be off air because we're not doing that. [00:26:43] Speaker A: Does he like Oskar Dansk? [00:26:44] Speaker C: Does he like mini cherry pies? [00:26:50] Speaker A: That's classy. [00:26:51] Speaker C: It's like Booger from the Nerds. [00:26:54] Speaker B: Okay, here we go. This is also feedback that I don't understand. He said that I'm always stepping on other people's jokes. [00:27:02] Speaker C: Yeah, my sister said that too. [00:27:03] Speaker B: What the hell does that mean? [00:27:04] Speaker C: He just bulldoze over people. Yeah. The amount of gems that have been lost, the amount of creativity that has come from my mouth and been lost into the ether and been trampled on underneath Bill o' Donnell's words, I could fill a book. [00:27:20] Speaker A: Is my smugness still an issue? [00:27:22] Speaker B: No. But another listener wrote in to the chat and said, after last week's episode, Mark was on new meds this week. Question Mark guy was a real silly [00:27:34] Speaker C: Goose, what were we talking about? [00:27:38] Speaker B: I don't remember. But last week, I guess you were really cutting it up and feeling good. He thought that maybe you were on a new medication. [00:27:44] Speaker A: No, I think that was the McTinder episode. It was the Scottish Lassie, right? [00:27:48] Speaker B: No, no, he said you're really feeling. [00:27:49] Speaker A: Brady, wait. [00:27:51] Speaker B: Can we go back to how I step on your jokes? Tell me what I'm doing. I'm not even aware of this. It crushed me to hear that as well as the. These other things. [00:28:02] Speaker C: Just. Just leave a little room, you know, just allow a little bit of extra room for people to finish their sentences or thoughts before you start talking. I think that might help. Just like that. [00:28:19] Speaker B: See, I feel like, you know, Groucho Marx here, you're Harpo and I don't know, whatever the other one is. [00:28:29] Speaker A: Carl. [00:28:30] Speaker B: Carl. Karl Marx. Richard Marx. And. And I got to carry the. Like, I gotta. I feel like I'm responsible for driving the. The. The agenda. The. The All. Everything. [00:28:43] Speaker A: Richard Marks was the worst musical actor ever. [00:28:47] Speaker C: What did he do? Is that a group? Is it a. Is it more than one person? [00:28:52] Speaker A: He did all this, like, middle aged woman ballady stuff. What was the main one he did? God, it was. I hated him so much. [00:29:01] Speaker B: Yeah. He had that big hair. [00:29:03] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:29:04] Speaker C: Is it from the 80s? [00:29:05] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:29:05] Speaker C: Anyway, did he do this song? I know I love you, but I'm [00:29:09] Speaker A: into deep Phil Collins. [00:29:11] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:29:13] Speaker C: I heard a stat once that there's a Phil Collins song on the radio in some sort of incarnation every 17 [00:29:17] Speaker B: minutes somewhere in the world. Yeah, probably more often than that. [00:29:21] Speaker C: It might have been seven, actually. Well, number of Jesus, Bill, your favorite. [00:29:28] Speaker B: Yep, yep, yep. So what's up? [00:29:42] Speaker C: Go ahead. [00:29:42] Speaker B: You want. I'm stepping on everybody's toes. Or punchlines or jokes? [00:29:46] Speaker C: Don't make it our problem. [00:29:47] Speaker B: I'll just sit back. You guys, you drive the bus. You don't know what the pressure's like of driving the show. You guys are like luggage I gotta throw on the bus every week. Why? [00:29:59] Speaker C: I think it's remarkable that you [00:30:03] Speaker B: view [00:30:03] Speaker C: yourself as having the pressure of driving the show. I think it's special. Isn't that special? [00:30:11] Speaker A: Wherever you go, whatever you do, I will be right here waiting for you. That's Richard. [00:30:20] Speaker C: Oh, really? That's a good song. [00:30:23] Speaker B: Yep. [00:30:25] Speaker A: Do it. Do that song as Sling Blade. What about the second act of Sling Blade? [00:30:33] Speaker C: What about it? [00:30:34] Speaker A: Yeah, I thought we were gonna do an episodic Sling Blade. [00:30:38] Speaker B: Oh, we're gonna do the whole. Yeah, all his words. [00:30:41] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:30:42] Speaker B: I'll bring the script Next week, I guess. [00:30:43] Speaker C: My Discover Weekly on Spotify. Like, the algorithm builds what it thinks you like into a weekly playlist. That following. Following that episode was all this dramatic string music. You probably like this because you listened to 45 minutes of it. Last Monday, I was playing the background music to your Sling Blade. I saw a poster at the. At the bike lane just now. There's a parody musical of Grease called Vape playing at the Apollo. Interesting, huh? [00:31:20] Speaker A: Emily Derisus produced that. Should contact Emily, get free tickets. [00:31:27] Speaker B: Are you serious? [00:31:28] Speaker A: Yeah, she. She does a show at that. That too much? No. What's the one Baby wants candy? That's at the Apollo. She's always doing musical parodies. [00:31:40] Speaker B: Is the Apollo a black theater? [00:31:42] Speaker A: No, it's. It's about as white as you're gonna get where it's located. Right? Just up from the Red Lion Pot. [00:31:49] Speaker C: Lincoln. [00:31:49] Speaker B: Oh, yeah, that one. Yeah. But whenever I think of Paul or hear Apollo, I think of. [00:31:53] Speaker C: That's what I thought too. [00:31:54] Speaker B: Apollo Creed in the theater. [00:31:57] Speaker A: What about the mission that went wrong? [00:32:00] Speaker B: I don't think about that. [00:32:01] Speaker C: They did at least 13 of them. [00:32:02] Speaker A: Greek God. [00:32:04] Speaker B: I don't think about that either. I think of Apollo Creed, the boxer, and then the black theater. [00:32:09] Speaker A: See, this is gold. This is podcast gold. [00:32:12] Speaker C: Yeah, the pacing is really good right now. [00:32:14] Speaker B: Is it? [00:32:15] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:32:15] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:32:16] Speaker B: See, I'm all off. [00:32:18] Speaker C: Huge improvement in just a matter of minutes. [00:32:23] Speaker B: I don't want to step on anyone's lines. [00:32:25] Speaker C: Yeah, you're doing really good. I'm proud of you. [00:32:30] Speaker B: Okay, well, anything else you guys want to talk about? [00:32:39] Speaker C: Nothing else has really happened. [00:32:43] Speaker A: So my missus has been away, and I've been doing a movie a night. So let me run, as you're our resident cineast. Is it cineast? Cineast, Right. [00:32:56] Speaker B: I believe it's synast. [00:33:00] Speaker A: What do you think of this first? First night, I warmed up with Wayne's World 2. [00:33:05] Speaker C: Oh. [00:33:07] Speaker A: Then I went to the Italian Job. Michael Kane. Not crapo. Sylvester Stallone knockoff. Then I done this one Triangle of sadness. That was a bit of a traips. That was Woody Harrelson. Then I done It Came from Outer Space. Then last night, I sort of fell asleep to Kind hearts and Coronets. Ealing. Classic. What do you think? At one point I was like, my missus is near. I should just do a whole Tarantino A to Z. [00:33:43] Speaker C: Well, she doesn't like Tarantino. [00:33:44] Speaker A: Yes. I should just do Tarantino A to Z. Boom. [00:33:51] Speaker B: Well, I might ask our other hosts. Christian, what do you think about that? [00:33:56] Speaker A: List. [00:33:56] Speaker C: I only recognize a number of the. Of the titles. What was the. What did you say after Wayne's World 2? [00:34:04] Speaker A: The Italian Job. [00:34:05] Speaker C: Okay. The Italian Job. Mark Wahlberg's better. That's what I was gonna ask. Is Mark Wahlberg's version the same as the Sylvester Stallone version, or were there three of them? [00:34:15] Speaker A: Well, they're all just shitty knockoffs of the Michael Caine original. [00:34:18] Speaker C: Okay, but were there. How many total then? Were there. Well, how many Italian jobs were made? [00:34:23] Speaker A: 2. [00:34:23] Speaker B: I thought is. [00:34:24] Speaker C: So brings me back to my original question. Is the Sylvester Stallone one. Was he in the Mark Wahlberg one? [00:34:31] Speaker B: I'm trying to wait for a pause. [00:34:32] Speaker C: This is an appropriate time. [00:34:35] Speaker B: I don't believe there is a Sylvester Stallone one, but I could be wrong. [00:34:38] Speaker A: There is. [00:34:40] Speaker B: Then there's three. [00:34:41] Speaker C: Then there's three. Okay, so there we go. So I've only seen the. I have only seen the. What kind of car were they using? The Mini Cooper version. [00:34:50] Speaker A: Classic. [00:34:51] Speaker C: Yeah, a lot of really good chase scenes in that movie. [00:34:55] Speaker A: They chase through the streets of Turin. [00:34:58] Speaker C: The first one's better, though, right? I mean, I'd imagine that's why they make. [00:35:01] Speaker A: Well, it's very camp and 60s. Like Benny Hill in it for a start. [00:35:05] Speaker C: Oh, is it funny? [00:35:08] Speaker B: I like Benny Hill. Sorry. [00:35:15] Speaker C: Thank you for speaking up. [00:35:16] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:35:17] Speaker B: You know, the other thing, and this might be the thing that's bothering me most is. And you're not going to like to hear this, Christian, and there were a couple listeners in the there that night, but. And they agreed, you and I don't apparently bring anything to the show. That Mark is the funniest. And that's the one. And I've heard this before. [00:35:38] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:35:38] Speaker B: My sister is the one they love the most. [00:35:40] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:35:42] Speaker B: So there you go. [00:35:42] Speaker C: Maybe it could just be Mark. [00:35:45] Speaker B: Yeah. Maybe we've just kind of fade into the background. [00:35:47] Speaker A: Yeah. But I hate this podcast. [00:35:49] Speaker C: Maybe we just intro. [00:35:50] Speaker B: Maybe we create a show around you for you. Yeah, we can kind of help. [00:35:54] Speaker C: I just do the sound effects. You get a good, like, Ed McMahon zinger in there every once in a while. [00:36:00] Speaker B: I can come up with some of the ideas, like for what to do each week. And then people just want to hear you talk. I realize more than anything. Right. [00:36:08] Speaker A: I find that difficult. [00:36:11] Speaker B: Yeah, you've said that before. But people out there love hearing you talk. I don't know if it's the British accent or, you know, your. Your mood swings and things like that or what, but you're the star of the show. [00:36:28] Speaker A: No, my voice is nauseating. And great. I. I have to edit this show and I'm literally just topping and tailing it and then skipping through. All right, here's how fast I edit this show. I find a good way to go, a good place to start it. Obviously, I chop it at the gong, right? Then I have to put in the little description in Castos, you know, blah, blah, blah. So then I have to revisit the first sort of 20 minutes of the show to find what bullshit we were spouting. Right. Just to come up with a general description. By the end of doing that, hearing my own voice, I am literally nauseated. [00:37:12] Speaker B: Do you wish that you didn't have a British accent? [00:37:16] Speaker A: No, I just. [00:37:19] Speaker B: For instance. No, go ahead. [00:37:24] Speaker A: No, I don't. I don't care. [00:37:27] Speaker B: Some of my students that come from different countries are very embarrassed or insecure about their accents or accenture to the English language, and they're reticent to talk in class because of that. I wondered if you didn't feel the same way being from Great Britain, where when you hear your voice, you realize that you're so very different than the rest of us. No, you're in America. [00:37:55] Speaker A: It's always been that way. [00:37:58] Speaker B: So, okay, so even when you were in England, you didn't like the sound of your voice? [00:38:01] Speaker A: No. Me and my mates used to gooner. You know, when you're a kid, you goon around making stupid tapes, doing phone pranks like that. [00:38:12] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:38:13] Speaker A: And even then it was like, God, why? [00:38:16] Speaker B: What do you think? You sound like the, the great British version of. Yeah. I don't know, like a, like a Weasley type of voice. [00:38:25] Speaker A: No, I don't know. I don't think anyone truly likes the sound of their own voice, do they? I do, except for comedians. [00:38:31] Speaker C: Have I told the story about the US parody, Weird Al Yankovic style parody that I made of the USSR song by the Beatles? Once when I was a kid, I did, I wrote, I was very into we Weird Al Yankovic and I on my paper route one day I wrote lyrics to USSR but all about somebody that's trapped in the hospital. And I played the music from my stereo at home and I recorded myself singing over the top of the Beatles all the lyrics to USSR Around Christmas time, my aunt and uncle were up here from North Carolina and somehow the tape got mixed into their tape collection. And on the way home they popped in a tape to hear me singing the lyrics to User over the Beatles USSR in the car and listen to the entire thing. And they called me up to let Me know, and as you can imagine as a 12, 13 year old, absolutely mortified and everlasting memory, because who are [00:39:27] Speaker B: the people that heard you singing it? [00:39:28] Speaker C: My aunt and my uncle and my cousins. Yes. [00:39:33] Speaker B: That they heard you. [00:39:34] Speaker C: Yeah, yeah. [00:39:35] Speaker B: Creating a song. [00:39:36] Speaker C: Yeah, well, yeah, because, you know, everything matters so much at that time in your life. [00:39:41] Speaker B: And how old were you again? [00:39:43] Speaker C: 12, 13 years old. [00:39:50] Speaker A: You should go on. [00:39:51] Speaker B: Thank you for telling that story. You're welcome. [00:39:54] Speaker C: What's that? I should what? [00:39:55] Speaker A: You know, there's that show, Mortified. [00:39:57] Speaker C: Oh, yeah. Go on that show and tell that story. [00:40:01] Speaker A: But you. You would then have to sing the song. [00:40:03] Speaker C: Yeah, I bet I can remember every single word to that song. I'll bet I could. I'll do that at karaoke sometime. Now there's an idea. I'm glad we talked about this. [00:40:16] Speaker B: Yes. Would you, like, want to kick it over here to Mark? Mark, do you have anything to say about Christian's story? [00:40:24] Speaker A: No, I already. I already chimed in a couple of times. [00:40:27] Speaker B: Okay. [00:40:28] Speaker C: It's an appropriate time for you to express your thoughts over it yourself there, Bill. [00:40:34] Speaker B: The story. [00:40:35] Speaker C: Sure. Anything you got? [00:40:37] Speaker B: No, I just rather. [00:40:38] Speaker C: How about the story? [00:40:40] Speaker B: Move it along. [00:40:41] Speaker C: How many stars out of five would you give it? How many? [00:40:47] Speaker B: Two and a half, I guess. [00:40:48] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:40:49] Speaker B: The story was not about the sound of your voice. It was about being overheard singing a song parody and being embarrassed about that more than was the sound of your voice. So it really was not building on the story that Mark told. Kind of just a story about yourself. [00:41:10] Speaker C: Yeah, I like talking about myself. This is nice. Yeah, this is. I like this calmer pace. [00:41:19] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:41:20] Speaker B: Yeah, I really don't mind it. I just really don't know what to do. [00:41:25] Speaker C: I think my voice sounds weird when I listen to this podcast. I always. I don't think it sounds when I hear it out of my own head. It doesn't sound that. Like low and nasally, you know, just kind of weird. Weird stuff. Billy, got anything to add? [00:41:40] Speaker B: Well, when I listen to the show, I sound like. I think I sound. [00:41:49] Speaker C: All right. [00:41:50] Speaker A: An interesting opinion there, Bill. Do you have any other interesting opinions to add to that? Interesting opinion? [00:41:58] Speaker B: No, that's it. [00:41:59] Speaker A: Okay. I mean, needless to say, I can't even listen to one of these podcasts. Yeah, I would. I would be vomiting. [00:42:07] Speaker C: Well, not to show my cards, but speaking of things that are hard to listen to, should we move on to today's review? [00:42:14] Speaker A: Wait, which one's today? [00:42:15] Speaker C: We're doing Davitel's Rough or Road Work. [00:42:19] Speaker A: That's today. Right. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, I thought. I thought. Because you said it, you sounded like you were implying it was a pile of shit, so I assumed it's the other one. [00:42:28] Speaker C: Well, like I said, didn't mean to show my cards. [00:42:31] Speaker A: Mm. Well, you picked it, though. [00:42:34] Speaker C: I did. Doesn't mean I liked it. [00:42:39] Speaker B: I think we should go back to talk before we get into David Tell's road work. [00:42:43] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:42:43] Speaker B: You don't mind? I think we should go back to talking about the format of the show. And. And we. We discussed. Because we were not going to meet after this, apparently discuss the criticism that was laid down by Alex Cuomo by [00:43:00] Speaker C: selling the drunk at a party. [00:43:03] Speaker B: The format is bad. That I step on everybody's jokes, which I understand now. Now I'm aware of it. And the. You know, no more gifts and things like that. [00:43:15] Speaker A: I thought he apologized. [00:43:16] Speaker B: You said he apologized, but he didn't mean it. [00:43:21] Speaker C: Why are you letting him get to you so much? Yeah, he's just some drunk guy sp. Shouting off at the mouth. [00:43:27] Speaker A: Yeah. I mean, maybe he is one third of our listenership. [00:43:30] Speaker C: He doesn't know how to run a podcast anyway. What sort of experience does he have to speak on? [00:43:35] Speaker B: He's a listener, and apparently we're turning off the listeners. [00:43:39] Speaker C: Yeah, well, there's plenty of other podcasts out there. [00:43:42] Speaker B: So you don't think we should change anything? [00:43:44] Speaker A: We're still begging Osaka. [00:43:45] Speaker C: Yeah. And that's the goal. Well, people love us in Osaka. [00:43:50] Speaker B: I've been waylaid by this criticism. You guys aren't out there apparently, meeting the listener? [00:43:56] Speaker C: No, I stay far away from the listeners. [00:43:57] Speaker B: And usually the positive. The feedback has been positive or at least inoffensive, but this time it wasn't. And, you know, it's like it. An actor receiving a terrible review of his film or a director or something like that, and it really. It gutted me. [00:44:15] Speaker C: You got to let it roll off your back. You can't please everybody. Especially. What's his name? [00:44:20] Speaker B: Alex Cormo. [00:44:21] Speaker C: Especially Alex. Come on. [00:44:24] Speaker B: And his wife Mina, Who? She didn't say. [00:44:26] Speaker C: Don't bring her. [00:44:27] Speaker A: I thought she was there. [00:44:28] Speaker B: She. She seemed to be supporting his opinions, [00:44:30] Speaker A: but, well, she was bent out of shape over the whole Steph Tollev fiasco. [00:44:34] Speaker B: Now, that was somebody else. That was another listener. We do have a lot of listeners, [00:44:38] Speaker A: but did I tell you about that play I went to, talking of bad reviews? No, Kowalski. [00:44:44] Speaker B: About Stanley Kowalski. Oh, you saw that? [00:44:47] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:44:49] Speaker B: Oh, I have to tell you something. Off air with Johnny Galecki. [00:44:51] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah, yeah. [00:44:52] Speaker B: I didn't know you went to see that? [00:44:54] Speaker C: Yeah, right after the flea market. [00:44:57] Speaker A: No, no, no. This is when my misses so it's two weeks ago. Good play. Yeah, yeah, yeah. When. When my missus says to me, oh, it's 90 minutes with no intermission, I was like, oh, my God, I. [00:45:09] Speaker C: Tell me about this. [00:45:10] Speaker A: I told you about it, right? I thought, oh, my God, this is going to be amazing. Major arsenic. [00:45:14] Speaker C: It's Quasimodo. [00:45:15] Speaker B: Well, it's too long. [00:45:16] Speaker A: It flew by not to have an intermission. 90 minutes. [00:45:21] Speaker B: Gosh, I can't wait to tell you something after the show, but I can't divulge it on the air. Yeah, it's good about Johnny Galecki and a very close relationship with him. [00:45:33] Speaker A: It's a good play. [00:45:35] Speaker B: Yeah, he was good as Tennessee Williams. [00:45:37] Speaker A: Tennessee Williams. [00:45:37] Speaker B: How about the chap that played Brando? How was he? [00:45:40] Speaker A: A little bit too brooding? No, no, no. I mean, he. He had the. He had the Brando. As you would imagine, Brando's voice, it was kind of. What is that word? Willowy. You know, the word willowy means he's sort of all limbs and it's just like. Yeah, Brando was like a pit bull, right? [00:45:58] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:45:59] Speaker A: So that was a little bit off [00:46:00] Speaker B: putting, but you enjoyed the performance by Johnny Galecki. Johnny Galecki, That's Tennessee Williams. [00:46:06] Speaker A: Yes. [00:46:07] Speaker B: Did he play it over the top? Feminine? [00:46:10] Speaker A: He was very camp. Yes, but. Yeah, because the only other characters in the play was a female critic who was a lifelong body of his and accepted the fact that he was an alcoholic and kind of abusive because he was a genius. Then there was Tennessee Williams's boyfriend. [00:46:29] Speaker B: Who, Truman Capote. [00:46:30] Speaker A: No, no. What was his name? [00:46:33] Speaker B: Same. Doing it again. [00:46:34] Speaker C: Oh, no. [00:46:36] Speaker B: See, when. When you talk, you'll. You can go like deer in the headlightsy, you know, like. And you. You're always thinking with your big brain. And then when you stop to, like, think of a word to say or whatever, that's when I jump in. [00:46:53] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:46:53] Speaker B: Because I feel I. [00:46:55] Speaker C: It's a dance. [00:46:55] Speaker B: Yeah. Like, I feel like I'm gonna try and finish your sentence. And that's what I think some of the criticism is about me just cutting you off. But they could see, like, how dear in the headlights you are, you know, when you talk. They would understand why I jump in. [00:47:11] Speaker C: Yeah, right. [00:47:12] Speaker B: You're not about to say anything. You're caught into, like a fugue state. [00:47:19] Speaker C: 90 minutes is a good play length. When I first started becoming more cultured, it happened a couple times where I would go to some sort of play and it would let out and I'd be like, all right, thank God. Like, I don't think I could have sat there for another minute. That was long enough. I'm ready to go get lunch. Whatever. Let's get out of here. Be standing out waiting for whoever I'm with. And then they'd say, okay, well, I'm gonna use the bathroom and then we'll head back in. I'd say, what? This is intermission. Like, what, we have to do the whole thing again? I thought it was over. [00:47:49] Speaker A: My sister just leaves in the intermission if she thinks it's shy, which I could never do. [00:47:53] Speaker C: I do that. Yeah. That's like, oh, my God. I love that. [00:47:58] Speaker A: It would bug me for so long to not complain. I have huge issues over closure. Finish it. [00:48:04] Speaker C: No, I'll leave. I. I won't even wait till intermission if it's that bad. Now I'm so cultured. I know. I know. When the play is over, I don't. It's. I don't get tricked anymore. But if it's terrible, I don't care how much I spend on the tickets. I'll do something else. [00:48:18] Speaker B: So you won't walk out of a movie either, Mark? [00:48:21] Speaker A: No. [00:48:21] Speaker B: No matter how bad it is? [00:48:23] Speaker A: Nope. [00:48:23] Speaker C: What if you've seen it before and you didn't know it when you walked into the movie? [00:48:29] Speaker A: That's never happened. [00:48:30] Speaker C: Well, [00:48:33] Speaker B: I already saw this. What about a comedian's act? Will you leave in the middle of the act? [00:48:39] Speaker A: No, normally leave before it starts. [00:48:44] Speaker B: I don't mean when you're working and running around. But you've never left a comedy show. [00:48:48] Speaker A: I have left a comedy show. I left Stella sketch at the Metro. God, it was shite. Do you remember where they were? The ascendant Hip alt. [00:48:59] Speaker B: No, I remember I was a big fan of Ectomorph. Yeah, yeah. Prophesonics. [00:49:07] Speaker A: Stella was Michael Ian Black and then two other people. [00:49:13] Speaker C: I left Louis CK in the middle of it. [00:49:15] Speaker B: Really? [00:49:15] Speaker C: Yeah. At the Vic. [00:49:16] Speaker A: Because he went knob out? [00:49:18] Speaker C: No, because I had been bartending every night for the, like, three or four nights prior to. And I kept falling asleep. [00:49:25] Speaker B: Standing up? [00:49:26] Speaker C: No, I was sitting in a chair. [00:49:28] Speaker B: Okay. [00:49:29] Speaker C: I was standing when I was bartending. [00:49:32] Speaker B: Stand up comedy show. [00:49:33] Speaker C: He was standing up. [00:49:34] Speaker B: Yeah, I meant the other way around, [00:49:37] Speaker C: but yeah, I just kept. I kept dozing off, and finally I was like, I have no idea what he's talking about. I may as well go. So I left. I did. I got up and. [00:49:43] Speaker B: Good for you. Good for you. [00:49:48] Speaker C: I was by myself. Too. So what if I had to wait for anybody? [00:49:51] Speaker A: What have you left in the middle of? [00:49:53] Speaker B: Yeah, Many, many things. [00:49:55] Speaker A: Really? [00:49:55] Speaker B: Yeah. Movies. A lot of movies. [00:49:57] Speaker C: Yeah, movies. [00:49:58] Speaker B: Sometimes I'll give a parting shot on the way out of the film. [00:50:02] Speaker C: What do you mean? [00:50:03] Speaker A: The audience just like flick the V's. [00:50:08] Speaker B: One time my wife and I went and saw Laws of Attraction starring Pierce Brosnan and Julianne Moore. Couple movie of some kind. It was terrible. The writing was terrible. I stood up, I said, let's go, we're out of here. And as we head towards the door, I stopped and I turned around. I said, these two are hot, but this movie's awful. We're leaving. [00:50:32] Speaker C: You just said it out loud to the atmosphere. [00:50:35] Speaker B: Yeah, well, this to the other people that were in. [00:50:37] Speaker C: Right. But to nobody in particular. [00:50:40] Speaker B: These two are hot, but this movie's terrible. We're leaving. [00:50:43] Speaker A: And then your misses Throw up any resist? [00:50:46] Speaker B: She was embarrassed. She didn't know I was gonna do it. [00:50:47] Speaker A: No, no, no resistance to leaving. [00:50:51] Speaker B: I don't know. [00:50:52] Speaker A: Couples movie. She might have been enjoying it. [00:50:54] Speaker C: How loud did you say that? [00:50:55] Speaker B: Loud. Shout. [00:50:57] Speaker C: It's it. [00:50:59] Speaker B: Aloud for all to hear. [00:51:00] Speaker C: I left Nosferatu. [00:51:02] Speaker B: Oh, you didn't enjoy that? [00:51:03] Speaker C: No. Well, here's the thing, okay. I went with Borky. We had bought tickets online weeks ahead of time for the music box showing of Nazara too. It was the middle of winter. And then they. We got there super early. They had like a bunch of little holiday cocktails in their bar area. So we were getting our holiday cocktails and there was a will call line outside or people like waiting to buy tickets. I don't know if it was sold out or what. Anyway, then all of a sudden they opened the door to all the people waiting in line, allowed them to get into the theater. So of course they took all of the good seats and put their coats over the seats of the people that hadn't arrived yet. [00:51:34] Speaker B: Yep. [00:51:34] Speaker C: And then allowed all of us in the standard bought tickets ahead of time. And there was nothing left. So we were stuck in the corner, like the first row behind, like behind the organ by the screen, you know. You know how the music box is. The sound bounces all over the place. And you can't really understand what the guy is saying that, well as it is. So I'm watching like I have no clue what's going on. I don't know what he said. Yeah. And so finally I just kind of nudged. I was getting a little hungry too, so I nudged Bork. He made the motion of like, let's get something to eat. You know, like hands holding a sandwich. An invisible sandwich and invisible biting it. [00:52:05] Speaker B: That could be misinterpreted too. [00:52:08] Speaker C: I was very clear, let's leave. Let's eat something. You know, the way you put your [00:52:12] Speaker B: hands up to your mouth like that is like. [00:52:14] Speaker C: Like. No, I know what you mean. But I was more flat out like this, like, this is a hamburger. [00:52:18] Speaker B: Yeah. You know, if it was more circular, it'd be. [00:52:20] Speaker C: Yeah, corn on the cob, maybe. No. So she resisted for a moment until finally she's like, yeah, you're right. Let's get out of here. This sucks. So we got up and left, and then I watched it on a flight somewhere with the captions on. Awesome movie. [00:52:34] Speaker B: Yeah, it's a good movie. [00:52:36] Speaker A: Did you know a gym shoe is actually a sandwich? [00:52:38] Speaker C: We've talked about this. [00:52:40] Speaker A: I thought you were, like, just joking. [00:52:42] Speaker C: Oh, no. [00:52:42] Speaker B: Yeah. What are you talking about? The. The book, A hero ain't nothing but a sandwich. A hero, not a gym shoe. [00:52:49] Speaker C: A gym shoe is a type of sandwich. [00:52:50] Speaker A: Gym shoe is a sandwich. I saw it on Facebook. [00:52:53] Speaker C: Yeah, they're great. You have the opportunity to get yourself a gym shoe sandwich. [00:52:57] Speaker B: It's not sandwich. [00:52:58] Speaker A: I say gooning. [00:53:00] Speaker C: Yeah. No, I was for real. [00:53:01] Speaker B: What does gooning mean? [00:53:03] Speaker A: It's messing around. [00:53:04] Speaker B: Oh, what is on a gym shoe sandwich? [00:53:07] Speaker A: It's just a load of rando crap, right? [00:53:09] Speaker C: Yeah. Could be like capicola, prosciutto, mozzarella usually. Then like their standard lettuce, tomato, shredded lettuce, and then some. Maybe some hot peppers, mayo, oil. [00:53:20] Speaker A: So not. [00:53:21] Speaker C: Not to just. It's the way. The reason it's called that is because the way they, like, kind of like bind everything up in the middle and they kind of scoop the inside of the bread out too, so when they chop it in half, it looks like an old gym shoe when you're looking at it. [00:53:32] Speaker B: Where would I get one of these in the city of Chicago? [00:53:34] Speaker C: One of my favorite places to get it is on Division by California. It's next to. If you. If you go to Logan Square Dental, which is my dentist, it's just. I don't know the name of the place. I can't remember off top of my head, but you can't miss it. It's just west of that by, like, a block, and they've got this gym shoe sandwich. [00:53:54] Speaker B: What's the name of this joint? [00:53:55] Speaker C: I can't. Like I said, I can't remember the name of it, but go to Logan Square Dental. Welcome to Black West. It's on the south side of the street. Now, there's two sandwich places over there, so you got to get the right one. Okay. [00:54:04] Speaker B: But you don't sell a gym shoe. [00:54:05] Speaker C: I don't know. I've never been to the other one. [00:54:07] Speaker B: I've never seen a gym shoe on the menu anywhere. [00:54:10] Speaker C: It's. It's more of a colloquial term. They don't really say on the menu there's a gym sandwich. Yeah, kind of like that, right? Yeah, like a stinger, you know? Yeah. Every single time I go to the dentist's office, I stop by there. Incredible sandwiches. [00:54:23] Speaker B: Before the dentist. You go, you know, all this shit in your teeth. [00:54:27] Speaker A: Yeah, pepperoni. [00:54:29] Speaker C: I'm paranoid about that. I floss like. I make sure everything is tip top shape. My dentist is also a friend of mine, so I'm not gonna make him look at me, you know, I'm not gonna like food stuck in my teeth. [00:54:38] Speaker A: That's the bloke you sent me to, right? [00:54:40] Speaker C: Yeah, yeah. [00:54:42] Speaker A: He's like Jack. [00:54:43] Speaker C: He's. He's like. He's like American. What's it. What's that? What's the. Damn it. Michael Bayne movie. [00:54:53] Speaker B: Terminator. [00:54:54] Speaker C: No, not American Graffiti. Not American History. X. American. American Psycho. [00:55:00] Speaker B: He's like that guy, Michael Baines. [00:55:02] Speaker C: What's the guy's name in that? [00:55:03] Speaker B: Christian Bale. Yeah, that guy. Michael. Michael Bean. [00:55:07] Speaker C: I knew it was wrong. [00:55:08] Speaker B: Do you. Did he work on your teeth? [00:55:10] Speaker A: This man pulled one out. [00:55:13] Speaker C: He's good. If you ever need dental work. His Name's Ian Hoffman. Dr. Ian Hoffman over there on Division. [00:55:18] Speaker B: He's a surgeon. Pull out wisdom teeth. [00:55:21] Speaker C: I don't know if it's. [00:55:21] Speaker B: Doctor, he pulled out his teeth. [00:55:23] Speaker C: Yeah, he's pulled out. I've got a missing tooth back here he yanked out of my head not too long ago. [00:55:27] Speaker B: Sounds very aggressive. This guy. [00:55:29] Speaker C: He's good at what he does. He gets it in one swoop, pops it right out. One swoop. [00:55:32] Speaker A: Pull. Oh, my God. Mine was a nightmare because it was sort of rotten. So it broke. Did it break up, like. Oh, God. I'm going to be here off. What I like about the place is there's nothing fancy. [00:55:42] Speaker B: So it's like a garage. [00:55:44] Speaker A: Yeah. So you're not, you know, you. You're not paying through the nose, right, for some bullshit paint job that you don't need. [00:55:53] Speaker B: See, that would be unsettling for me to walk into a dingy dentist office. [00:55:56] Speaker A: It's not dingy. It's just not all chrome and mirrors [00:56:00] Speaker C: and all he does have a nice little TV that you can watch. [00:56:04] Speaker A: Yeah, it's a tv, and it's got all, like. Like. What do you call them? Tropical islands? [00:56:10] Speaker C: Yeah, it's like. It's almost like promo videos for, like, tropical island hotels where it's just like drones, like, going through the hotel and showing the amenities and, like, here's the sand. Right. Very easy to stare at that and forget. [00:56:21] Speaker A: I thought he was gonna try and sell me a condo. Like, timeshare. [00:56:25] Speaker B: Right? Yeah, that's what it sounds like. [00:56:26] Speaker C: Maybe that's what his wife does. I don't know. [00:56:30] Speaker B: I think it'd be interesting. [00:56:31] Speaker C: She pops in at the end with [00:56:32] Speaker B: a pamphlet to see how people react if you put on, like, soft pornography. [00:56:39] Speaker C: Porn? [00:56:40] Speaker B: Yeah, like, just like some kind of, like, Cinemax movie. Put that on. [00:56:44] Speaker C: Or like, Requiem for a Dream. [00:56:46] Speaker A: When I met my Mrs. You know the Liars Club on. [00:56:51] Speaker B: Sure. [00:56:52] Speaker A: Belmont. [00:56:53] Speaker C: Yeah, of course. [00:56:54] Speaker A: No, not Belmont. The next one. [00:56:55] Speaker B: Clyborne, is it? [00:56:56] Speaker A: No, no, Liars Clubs, Fullerton. That's where I met my missus. [00:57:01] Speaker C: Oh, really? [00:57:02] Speaker A: But when. When I met her, they were playing this bizarre Japanese porn. All the screens. [00:57:09] Speaker B: Really? [00:57:09] Speaker A: Yeah, Full pen. It was like. No, it was like. It was like they were. It was. It was sort of a karate porn movie. So they'd start fighting and end up shagging. [00:57:21] Speaker C: They really liked each other. [00:57:22] Speaker A: Choreography. Yeah, it was. And you were looking at it like, okay, karate fight. Wait, she's doing that. [00:57:31] Speaker B: But did they show. Full pen. [00:57:34] Speaker C: Sean Penn, then. [00:57:35] Speaker A: It showed. They showed Pen. Not Teller. [00:57:38] Speaker B: Did they show everything? [00:57:40] Speaker A: Yes, everything. [00:57:41] Speaker B: It going in and out? [00:57:43] Speaker A: Yes. [00:57:43] Speaker B: Really? You can show that kind of thing in a. [00:57:45] Speaker C: Did you ever go to porn and chicken? [00:57:48] Speaker B: You're not showing up for that and you're seeing. Penetrate. What? [00:57:50] Speaker C: Did you ever go to porn and chicken at Evil Olive? No, they used to have that. That was over on Division. In. What else? Didn't know Division in Milwaukee? Yeah, Right. The Six Corners over there. I think it's gone now, but, yeah, they used to have porn and chicken night, and they would serve chicken. There'd be porn on all the TVs. Hardcore porn. And on top of that, the most aggressively insane dance music you ever heard. Just blasting and lasers and smoking. People on pedestals dancing with weird costumes on. It was. It was a scene. [00:58:16] Speaker B: Jesus. [00:58:17] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:58:17] Speaker B: And then it's fried chicken. [00:58:19] Speaker C: I never tried the chicken. [00:58:21] Speaker B: Bizarre. [00:58:23] Speaker A: Yeah. Liars Club was always kind of edgy, though. [00:58:26] Speaker C: It's still there. They're still around, right? Yeah, I. I used to really enjoy going there. I haven't been in forever. There's also great bands there. They have. Right. They have a stage in the back. I think I've seen a band there. [00:58:38] Speaker A: There's a dance floor, so they probably could. [00:58:40] Speaker C: No, I think I'm mixing it up with another place, too. [00:58:42] Speaker B: So that was the night you met Heather. [00:58:43] Speaker A: And also the night I went. Met Heather, I'd gone to a c. Boogie Nights with another glass called Heather. [00:58:53] Speaker C: Whoa. Come on. [00:58:53] Speaker A: Look at that. For a couple. [00:58:55] Speaker B: That same night. [00:58:56] Speaker A: Same night. [00:58:57] Speaker B: And then you went to the Liars Club. Yeah, then we watched Japanese porn. [00:59:00] Speaker A: And then that's where. Because we jokingly used to call this woman Other Heather, because she was just a friend of mine. [00:59:08] Speaker C: Yeah, the one that you went to go see Boogie Nights with. [00:59:10] Speaker A: So I went to see Boogie Nights with my friend Other Heather and that cinema on Michigan Avenue and then went up to the Liars Club because she was meeting a friend of a friend and. [00:59:22] Speaker B: And you didn't know Heather at all? [00:59:24] Speaker A: Not at all. No. [00:59:25] Speaker B: She's just a stranger in a bar to you. [00:59:27] Speaker A: She was with these. She was part of this group that Other Heather was meeting. [00:59:31] Speaker B: Okay. And then you watched. You sat and talked while this Japanese porn was playing in the background. Did you. Did that lead to any kind of. You know where I'm going with this? [00:59:41] Speaker A: No, because we didn't immediately run out and get busy. Well, what happened was. [00:59:47] Speaker B: Makes me feel funny. [00:59:49] Speaker C: I Gives you feelings. [00:59:51] Speaker A: So how. Our next meeting was at Will's Northwood Tap. Because she was a Packers fan and. And she's like, oh, you know, I live around the corner. Do you want to meet at Will's on Sunday? There we watched the infamous Dave Wanstead goes for two and loses the match. Packers Bears game, if you remember that. I don't, but the infamous. Like, he could have tied the game, but he went for two. They missed it. Packers win. Then the following night, we went to see the Blackhawks versus the Washington Capitals. [01:00:26] Speaker B: You and Heather, three nights. [01:00:28] Speaker A: She swears there was a night between it, but I'm like, no, it was three in a row. [01:00:33] Speaker B: And you had your tickets to the. To the Blackhawks. You brought her. [01:00:36] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:00:37] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:00:38] Speaker A: What was funny was we always talk about when it was the packers game, she did not want me to talk to her. It's just like, you know, so I'm sitting there and she's just like. Then when we go to the Blackhawks game, I got the blinkers on. I'm watching this. Shut up. [01:00:55] Speaker B: Really? [01:00:55] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:00:56] Speaker B: So what would happen the next night? [01:00:58] Speaker A: You. [01:00:59] Speaker B: I don't know, it's just three nights in a row. [01:01:02] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:01:03] Speaker B: The rest is history. [01:01:04] Speaker C: So your first and second dates were both dates where one person wanted to pay attention, the other person wanted to talk. [01:01:11] Speaker A: Yeah. The other was just like, yeah, yeah, whatever. [01:01:13] Speaker B: Yeah. Well, obviously I want to know more about what was going on. [01:01:19] Speaker C: That was a good segment. We could do one of those every week. [01:01:23] Speaker B: What did we call it? [01:01:24] Speaker A: How I met the Mrs. How I [01:01:26] Speaker B: met the Mrs. And you can put [01:01:28] Speaker C: a laugh track in the background. [01:01:29] Speaker A: Yeah. And you could do different misses's. [01:01:31] Speaker B: Yeah. Well, we only got three of us in here. [01:01:33] Speaker A: Yeah, well, no, but. Well, you wouldn't be allowed to talk about how you met different misses's, would you? Be. Be grilled heavily. [01:01:41] Speaker B: Yeah, I'm not talking. Oh, how you met Mrs. Yeah. [01:01:43] Speaker A: Our Mrs. Or Shag stories. [01:01:45] Speaker B: That's the other thing that people want. They want to hear about. No, you want your sex lives. No. Begin wants. [01:01:51] Speaker C: Sex sells. Yeah. What's up with the game? [01:01:55] Speaker B: You know, he's. He's. He's out there listening. I'm not gonna say what his feedback is. [01:02:00] Speaker A: Wasn't he at the party where he could have leapt to your defense? [01:02:03] Speaker B: He wasn't at that party. No. [01:02:05] Speaker C: Was he busy? [01:02:05] Speaker B: He might have. He might have piled on as well. He's never. He gives it more. Gives us more feedback on us as individuals. [01:02:13] Speaker C: Right. [01:02:13] Speaker B: And how sad our lives are rather than the show itself. The format. He doesn't question the format. It really way waylaid me to think that we're doing this all wrong. [01:02:23] Speaker C: Oh, this guy doesn't know what he's talking about. [01:02:25] Speaker B: All right, let's show him, huh? Should we show him right now? [01:02:28] Speaker C: Yeah. [01:02:28] Speaker B: Before we get into today's comedian, you've [01:02:31] Speaker A: only got like 15 minutes, dude. [01:02:33] Speaker C: I know. [01:02:33] Speaker B: Boy. Dave Attell and road work from 2014. I just want to take this moment because Tomorrow is my 20th wedding anniversary. [01:02:41] Speaker C: Oh, wow. [01:02:42] Speaker B: I'd like to say happy anniversary to my wife Kate, who's out there listening because we were going to go downtown this weekend to celebrate, but because of the marathon, all the hotel rooms were astronomically priced. And then as a result, we're headed out a little west to Northbrook and to the Sybaris pool and suites for [01:03:07] Speaker A: a night I never knew anyone who actually went. [01:03:09] Speaker B: I've not either. [01:03:11] Speaker C: Is that one of those. [01:03:12] Speaker B: It's a sex hotel. [01:03:13] Speaker A: It's a shagging hotel. [01:03:15] Speaker B: It's made just for shagging. And I didn't want to spring it on her because she thought we were going to a hotel. Downtown. But I was like, I better tell her first. She's not wanting to do this. Not because she doesn't want to have a big old shag. She does. But she doesn't want to walk around a hotel where everyone is there and [01:03:35] Speaker A: like when you check in. [01:03:37] Speaker B: Yeah, like, hi, hello, we're here to have a big shag. [01:03:41] Speaker A: Which room have you got? The one with the fox wing or the one with the. The. The triple end? The rabbit. [01:03:49] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. Pull rabbit out of a hat. [01:03:52] Speaker A: I mean, can you imagine being the receptionist that you're just going to be winking it. All right, mate? All right, mate? [01:03:58] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. It's not. It seems seedy, like a by the hour motel. But if you look online it looks very nice. [01:04:04] Speaker C: Oh yeah. [01:04:05] Speaker B: Pictures look very nice. It's not cheap. Sybaris. Well the thing is they call them pool suites. [01:04:11] Speaker C: I don't like that name. Sybaris. It sounds like something you catch. [01:04:13] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. [01:04:14] Speaker A: I mean it wasn't cheap because they probably have disinfect the rooms every time. [01:04:18] Speaker B: Yeah, it was one of my wife's questions. It's about the cleaning, but you gotta think, they gotta really clean it. [01:04:24] Speaker C: You gonna bring a black light with you? [01:04:25] Speaker A: Yeah, I was gonna say, do you remember. Did you used to watch the Office? [01:04:29] Speaker C: Yep. [01:04:29] Speaker A: Do you remember the one where they stay in a hotel and they turn the black light on? [01:04:34] Speaker C: I don't think I remember that one. [01:04:38] Speaker A: Like Michael Scott's like, yeah, we're gonna have a party in my room and they have a black light and then they turn the black light on and they. I remember that and everything. And Dwight's like, yeah, I think it's semen mainly. I will say that was a bloody good joke. [01:04:55] Speaker C: That's when they went to the convention. [01:04:56] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:04:57] Speaker B: Partying. A black light. [01:05:00] Speaker C: Yeah. I don't bring a black light to a hotel. [01:05:01] Speaker A: One of the best jokes ever written was David Angelo. David Angelo was talking about like they had a. Like someone set up a restaurant, a black light restaurant. And David Angelo had this joke like, do you really want to see your food under a black light? Yeah. [01:05:18] Speaker C: For real? [01:05:20] Speaker B: No, because there would be jizz on it. [01:05:23] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:05:25] Speaker B: Why is it that the only thing that shows up on a black light [01:05:28] Speaker A: is jizz and blood. [01:05:30] Speaker B: Blood and jizz. [01:05:31] Speaker C: Bodily fluids. [01:05:32] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:05:33] Speaker B: That's. There's got to be other things. [01:05:34] Speaker A: Anything with DNA in it. [01:05:36] Speaker B: Basically that's what a black light does. I don't understand it. I don't understand how certain things show up. [01:05:42] Speaker C: Bodily fluid cells react. [01:05:43] Speaker A: Blacklights because they like party you never watch the csi? [01:05:47] Speaker B: Not really. [01:05:48] Speaker A: I love csi and it's the black light every episode. [01:05:52] Speaker B: Do you look for jizz? [01:05:53] Speaker A: Looking for jizz and blood. [01:05:55] Speaker C: That was the working title of the show. Jizz and Blood. [01:05:58] Speaker B: Jizz and Blood, Yeah. Looking for jizz. All right, guys, look for jizz and blood. [01:06:02] Speaker A: I don't know how the script writers came up with, like, they always have to have a snap when they find the jizz. They always have to have a snappy one liner. Like, well, I suppose they were getting busy then, you know, I was like, how did the script write? Okay, every week. What are we gonna do when they find the jizz? [01:06:18] Speaker B: You said that last time. You gotta give them something else. [01:06:20] Speaker C: They just do one all nighter in the beginning of the season. Write them all right. [01:06:23] Speaker B: Then just jokes. [01:06:25] Speaker C: Go to the well. [01:06:26] Speaker B: Jizz one liners. That'd be a good job for me. Yeah. [01:06:29] Speaker A: I was gonna say that's like, got you written all over it that. [01:06:32] Speaker B: Wish there was a job like that, you know, out there for me. [01:06:35] Speaker C: I'm sure there is. [01:06:36] Speaker B: Yeah. All right, well, let's get to the real town. Dave Attell, Road work. Christian chose this one from 2014, which is a 12 years ago, a lifetime since he was out there doing this road work. David Tell, why did you choose him? [01:06:54] Speaker C: Yeah, I don't know. It was a long time ago, and I picked them. Usually I pick somebody that's classic comedian. I think I was probably thinking of, like, okay, who's been around forever and has been doing this for a very long time, and we haven't reviewed them. And David Tell came to mind. I may have done some. Sometimes I'll do some sort of search like that. I'll put in kind of like what I'm looking for and see what the Internet spits out at me, and I'll kind of take their recommendations and pick one. Could have been something like that. But I know ultimately what made me decide yes was because I used to really enjoy his show Insomniac when I was in high school, I believe. I think it was like 2001, he had that show, and I wanted to see how it held up, how his comedy held up. [01:07:36] Speaker B: Insomniac was that. That late night. It was a show at Comedy Central, but it was clips of him and other comedians, right? [01:07:43] Speaker C: No, that was. That was. That was. Tough crowd with Colin Quinn. [01:07:46] Speaker A: Yeah. It was just a travel program where you go to different cities and get drunk. [01:07:50] Speaker C: He was like Anthony Bourdain, but like a comic just walking around making fun of people instead. [01:07:55] Speaker B: So you'd seen him before and. [01:07:57] Speaker C: Yeah, right. And actually, I did see him live one time at University Buffalo, when I lived in Buffalo. So, yeah, I was. I was a fan of his back then. I want to see what I thought now. [01:08:06] Speaker A: Bonus question. Who did you once call a shitty wannabe? Davitel. [01:08:16] Speaker B: Well, when I'm watching him, he looks like Mike Olsen to me, but the actors like it. But Prescott Tolk. [01:08:23] Speaker A: You got it. [01:08:25] Speaker B: Yes, but I don't want to offend him that way. But I say that. [01:08:29] Speaker A: No, you said that to me. [01:08:30] Speaker B: Okay, good. I'm glad I didn't say that to him. He had the same cadence, the same rhythm, the same delivery. He really did. Right. Like we all borrow from somewhere. I mean, I was ripping off Norm MacDonald, so he was clearly doing Dave Attel. What's your history with Davitel? [01:08:48] Speaker A: I had never watched Insomniac. I knew he was big news. I saw him once at Zany's and thought he was the funniest ever. The only reason I went is the. The last, who was like, one of the office people at Zany's. [01:09:03] Speaker B: Martin. [01:09:04] Speaker A: No, no, no. This last. We knew you wouldn't know. I don't think. And she said, will you. To me and a bunch of English friends, will you please come to see Dava Tell. It's embarrassing to me that he comes to Zany's on a Thursday and there's only 12 people in the audience. Like, I'm really trying to just get people there. [01:09:24] Speaker B: Wow. He wasn't obviously a draw at this point, but. Or was he? What year? [01:09:28] Speaker A: I thought this Insomniac was already a thing at that point. I don't know. I think it was just a midweek gig and whatever. And I always remember this. I do always remember this. He got. I looked around and he. Gone to the. He was just about going in the toilet. He'd opened the door, you know, you can see the toilet. And Patty Vasquez, who was the host, introduced him. [01:09:53] Speaker B: So he's coming out of the toilet? [01:09:55] Speaker A: No, no. As he was trying to go in. Oh. So I was. I see this. You know, I'm a producer. I'm like, wow, he was just gonna go in the toilet. And she. She brought him up. And as he walked up to the stage and he said to her, I was just going in the bathroom. How about some professionalism here? And she. She was like. Talk about deer in her headlights. I saw. You know, I knew I. I was tracking the whole thing. And I locked in on what he said. [01:10:25] Speaker B: You could hear what he said? [01:10:26] Speaker A: I heard him. He muttered it under his breath. Yeah, because we were right near the front. There was very few people there. [01:10:34] Speaker B: Wow. [01:10:35] Speaker A: But I was. I saw his. I saw the anger in his eyes as he walked that. The long walk down Zany's and climbed the stairs. And. And Patty was. [01:10:45] Speaker B: You ever talked to her about it? [01:10:46] Speaker A: No, I never did talk to her about it. [01:10:48] Speaker C: Does she listen to this program? [01:10:50] Speaker A: I'm guessing not. She has her own show on wgn. [01:10:53] Speaker B: She does. [01:10:53] Speaker A: What is it like her and Dwayne. Dwayne's on it a lot. [01:10:58] Speaker B: Dwayne Kennedy? Yeah, it's a stand up show. [01:11:00] Speaker A: No, it's just a chitter chat. [01:11:02] Speaker C: The radio station. [01:11:03] Speaker B: WG and the radio. [01:11:04] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:11:05] Speaker B: Oh, okay. Yeah. I was thinking WG and the TV channel. Okay. And what. Where do we know about Davitel now? [01:11:15] Speaker C: He's still. He's actually going to be performing in Minneapolis, I think on the 7th. But he mostly just does shows in San Jose. [01:11:24] Speaker A: So for years, Reggie's Rock Club was trying to partner with the Lincoln Lodge. [01:11:29] Speaker C: Okay. Yeah, for sure. [01:11:30] Speaker A: Because they thought I could. I had some inside track to getting big names. So I said, all right, who do you want Lincoln Lodge to try and bring to Reggie's? And they said, Dave Attell. Dave Attell. We want Davitel. So I reached out to his agent and his agent said, nice. He can't do anywhere other than improv because they'll piss him off. And I. And I said, it's two different worlds. It's that Schaumburg. This is Chicago. Nobody who lives in Chicago is driving out Schaumburg to see Dave Attell. But he wouldn't have it, really. [01:12:08] Speaker C: What about the Zani's gig? [01:12:10] Speaker A: Well, this was like way before that at this point, I guess. Yeah, I guess maybe insomniac came after it because that. That improv is a fucking barn. [01:12:20] Speaker C: Right. [01:12:20] Speaker A: But the problem is the headline is that once they get like the improv is just Schburg. It's three other places. So once they say, all right, we'll give you this one. Now you're our property for the circuit. [01:12:33] Speaker B: Yeah. When you go to the city, you got to do our place. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. All right, so he's still working. He's still out there. [01:12:41] Speaker C: Still working. [01:12:42] Speaker B: Still out there working. I never during the day. I didn't really like Davitel, I don't think. And I don't know why. [01:12:50] Speaker A: Why? [01:12:51] Speaker B: Yeah, I don't like him. [01:12:52] Speaker C: I don't know, I might know why [01:12:54] Speaker B: I always kind of coupled him with Jeffrey Ross. [01:12:57] Speaker C: Yeah. [01:12:58] Speaker B: Who I didn't really like. [01:12:59] Speaker C: They did a lot of work together. [01:13:00] Speaker B: Do they? [01:13:00] Speaker C: Yeah. [01:13:01] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:13:01] Speaker C: I think I know the reason why he didn't like David Tell. He dated Sarah silverman in the 90s. [01:13:05] Speaker B: Did he? [01:13:06] Speaker C: Maybe it's that connection. [01:13:07] Speaker B: What else do you know about this man? [01:13:09] Speaker C: Quite a bit. [01:13:09] Speaker B: Okay, well, let it rip. Whenever. So I didn't really care for him and I never watched him, you know, past whatever I saw early on. [01:13:18] Speaker C: So. [01:13:18] Speaker B: Yeah, so I didn't come to this with high expectations, I'll say that. But the. The format of this having clips from [01:13:28] Speaker C: four or five specials, that was different. [01:13:30] Speaker B: That was cool. [01:13:31] Speaker C: Yeah. I didn't know that that's what he was doing. [01:13:33] Speaker B: Yeah. Right. And it seemed like you. You were. He was just taking the best of from these sets and just coupling them together, which is really what you want to see. Right. [01:13:41] Speaker A: I don't know if the editor was doing that, but he ended each one with we'll be right back. [01:13:46] Speaker C: Yeah, yeah. [01:13:46] Speaker B: So he. [01:13:46] Speaker A: So he knew. Yeah, he knew. This is the end. [01:13:48] Speaker B: Yeah. How about these comedy clubs? Vinnie Brands Stress Factory. [01:13:52] Speaker A: Stress Factory. I love New Jersey. [01:13:54] Speaker B: Been there. [01:13:55] Speaker A: No, but I love the name. [01:13:56] Speaker B: How about the Hookah Lao? Where was that? [01:13:58] Speaker A: Oh, God, I would have loved that. [01:13:59] Speaker C: Was that In Philly or D.C. that was. [01:14:01] Speaker A: I looked that place up because I'm like, if that Jeffers still exists, I'm going there. But it does not exist anymore. [01:14:08] Speaker B: Where was it? [01:14:12] Speaker A: D.C. no, it was. It wasn't. Helium was Philly. [01:14:18] Speaker B: Helium was Philly. Acme Comedy Club was Minneapolis. [01:14:22] Speaker A: Yeah. And then the Stress Factory was where [01:14:25] Speaker B: you said that was in New Jersey. Then the last one, One Eyed Jax, was in New Orleans. [01:14:32] Speaker A: I think that that Hawaii place was somewhere near Boston. [01:14:38] Speaker B: Really? It could be. There's a lot of comedy clubs and Chinese restaurants in Boston. For whatever reason, they put them in the back of Chinese Rest. [01:14:46] Speaker C: Weird. [01:14:46] Speaker B: Yeah. I always thought that was normal growing [01:14:48] Speaker A: up there, but the idea off me. Yeah. [01:14:51] Speaker B: Yeah. How's that? Because you put it in a restaurant. [01:14:54] Speaker A: Restaurant. Yeah. Well, clearly everything is derivative of that. [01:14:57] Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah. Even though it predates that. That the Lincoln watch. [01:15:04] Speaker A: So. [01:15:04] Speaker C: Yeah. [01:15:04] Speaker B: So I was like, david, tell. Okay, well, we know what this guy's about, right? [01:15:11] Speaker A: Holy. [01:15:12] Speaker B: This was incredible. I thought. I thought this. This guy's jokes were some of the best I've ever heard. And write my wheelhouse of filth. [01:15:21] Speaker A: Yep. Filthy. And then you got the one liners. I love the one where he picked on the audience, he goes, this is the. This is the Mount Rushmore of lonely right here. Because they all look like him, right? [01:15:33] Speaker B: Yeah. So many lines. So many great lines. How much of it is improv? How much of it is off the cuff? How much do you think is just part of his act everywhere he goes? [01:15:44] Speaker C: I'd say the majority is probably part of his act. [01:15:46] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He's teeing them up every time, right? Which one? What other ones did you like? [01:15:55] Speaker A: My penis is full of Jaeger and lies. [01:16:01] Speaker B: I like, there's no midgets here, you know, because it doesn't smell like cinnamon. I don't even know what that means. [01:16:07] Speaker C: Yeah, I don't get it. [01:16:10] Speaker B: Yeah, I don't either, but I like it when I don't get it. How about this gang banger here eating strawberry shortcake we talked about? You find out that his crowd work was really good? On my best day, my balls smell like a foot. [01:16:29] Speaker A: Yeah, [01:16:32] Speaker B: you. I am. [01:16:33] Speaker A: I don't want to take a petty cab. It always feels like there's a hint of slavery. [01:16:37] Speaker B: Yes, I have that one. How about I am for gay marriage? As long as they are the same race. [01:16:45] Speaker A: Yes. [01:16:46] Speaker B: Really? [01:16:47] Speaker C: I think I missed that one. [01:16:48] Speaker A: No, that's. That's. That's a missile, that line. [01:16:51] Speaker B: Yeah. That's amazing. So, I mean, I. I just love this. This. I didn't expect to. And I didn't have a high opinion of him from when I was younger, I guess, even though we have similar sense of humor, I would think, but God damn, I was super impressed. He's one of the best, right? He's got to be one of the best. He's a comedian's comedian too, right? Oh, well, not. Maybe not Patty Vasquez. [01:17:20] Speaker C: And, you know, it's. You know, it's impressive, too. He's never gotten in trouble. You think like a guy like that, you look at his material, you look at who he is, you look at how long he's been doing, like, somewhere along the way, somebody had to be like, oh, he did some weird. I think all this dirty talk, squeaky clean. [01:17:33] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:17:34] Speaker C: Yeah, he doesn't have any, like, he doesn't even have any, like, exes out there talking about weird stuff he did. You know, just. He just does his act and goes, [01:17:42] Speaker B: yeah, like Fred Armisen's. [01:17:44] Speaker C: He said he stopped drinking in the late 2000s, but only because he had a gastro bleeding problem. He was bleeding from his stomach, so he had to stop. So even. Even the reason he stopped drinking is a pretty Legitimate one. [01:17:59] Speaker B: So in this special, he's not drinking. Right. Look, he was drinking Coke. [01:18:02] Speaker C: No. Yeah. Not in this one. [01:18:04] Speaker A: I thought he had a pina colada. [01:18:05] Speaker C: I thought he had two bottles of water on the table. [01:18:06] Speaker B: I talked about a pina colada. I remember him drinking a Coke in one of the these. But. [01:18:12] Speaker C: But they said. At least the Internet says he was sober as of late 2000s. And this was in 2014 for the listener's sake. [01:18:22] Speaker B: Well, yeah, I. I super impressed. Has he ever come through here? [01:18:29] Speaker A: I think he does come into Chicago now. [01:18:32] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:18:32] Speaker A: Because I stopped asking, probably. Well, I'm not sure where he. I can't think where he plays in Chicago. Isn't Reggie's, I'll tell you that. [01:18:41] Speaker B: No, no. So what. Whatever happened that Reggie's never, never took off? Lincoln Lodge at Reggie's. [01:18:47] Speaker A: They had this weird idea that the Lincoln Lodge has some sort of pull in the. In the comedy community. [01:18:54] Speaker C: Well, it's a weird place to do comedy. [01:18:57] Speaker A: Anyway, I promoted Drew. Michael wanted to go there, so I did a produce to show there for Drew. [01:19:03] Speaker C: Was it on the main stage downstairs, [01:19:05] Speaker A: or was it upstairs? Big bugger. [01:19:06] Speaker C: Okay. [01:19:07] Speaker A: We had to kind of pat it a bit. And then. I've seen Stanhope at Reggie's. [01:19:10] Speaker C: Yeah. Okay. [01:19:11] Speaker A: It wasn't even that full, though. That was the weird thing. [01:19:15] Speaker B: It's rock and roll. If you wanted more of a rock and roll vibe. [01:19:18] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah. [01:19:19] Speaker C: It's also. It's kind of a hike to get [01:19:21] Speaker B: to Reggie down there in the South Loop. [01:19:23] Speaker A: Yeah, it is a pain. [01:19:24] Speaker C: I'm a huge fan of the place, [01:19:25] Speaker A: just not a fan as well. I think it's. It's like, got it looks like grungy, like a rock club. But it's designed to be like, you know, the floor is. Got steep. Right, right. [01:19:39] Speaker C: The slant, everything. [01:19:41] Speaker A: It's like. No. Someone thought about what a club needs, but then made it look like what you want sort of thing. [01:19:48] Speaker C: I would say the staff is similar to that. The staff, they're all tatted up. You think like, oh, I'm gonna order a beer from this guy. He's gonna give me an attitude. And the staff is very friendly. [01:19:56] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. [01:19:58] Speaker A: Comes from the top down. [01:20:00] Speaker B: Sure does. [01:20:01] Speaker A: They were very good to deal. I mean, they clearly thought the Lincoln Lodge had some sort. Was something it wasn't. [01:20:09] Speaker C: A couple of the guys that come around here, they do a show over there Monday nights. [01:20:12] Speaker A: Yeah. On that top. I've never seen the top floor. [01:20:15] Speaker C: Yeah, it's decent. I did that show a couple times. [01:20:18] Speaker B: Well, they also have a shuttle for the bear skins, so if you go there, they will. [01:20:22] Speaker C: Really? For the Bears games. I knew they did something for the White Sox games, but I didn't know they did that for the Bears. [01:20:27] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:20:27] Speaker A: Oh, talking of which, we never recapped his marathon bloody trailer. Trailer tailgate from last week. [01:20:37] Speaker B: Oh, was that last week? [01:20:39] Speaker A: That's like a 12 hour day. Yeah, yeah. [01:20:41] Speaker B: 2:00 clock to 10:00 clock at night. What a beautiful night, though. Such a nice night. It was gorgeous out. The Bears won. [01:20:49] Speaker C: I gotta go. [01:20:50] Speaker B: I spent all after the. The Eagles fans. It was very nice. [01:20:55] Speaker C: Let me just give my vote and leave your vote. [01:20:57] Speaker B: It's your pick. [01:20:58] Speaker C: Yeah, I know. Well, I still vote on it. [01:21:00] Speaker B: All right, go ahead. [01:21:01] Speaker C: Two out of five. [01:21:01] Speaker B: Two out of five? [01:21:02] Speaker C: Yeah. [01:21:03] Speaker B: Why? [01:21:04] Speaker C: It's not my brand. [01:21:05] Speaker B: What's going on out here? 5:00 in the afternoon. [01:21:09] Speaker C: I'm covering Jordan tonight. [01:21:11] Speaker A: 6:00 clock open mike. You signing up? 5:30. Sign up. [01:21:15] Speaker B: What day is it? Tuesday. [01:21:16] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:21:16] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:21:17] Speaker C: Hey, just. [01:21:17] Speaker B: Just get a good crowd. [01:21:18] Speaker C: Just call me when it's time to do the gong. Okay. [01:21:21] Speaker B: What time does the show go off? [01:21:23] Speaker A: 6 o' clock is the open mic, right? [01:21:25] Speaker B: It starts at 6. [01:21:27] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:21:27] Speaker C: Sign up to 5:30. [01:21:29] Speaker A: Yeah. He's gonna get everything open. [01:21:32] Speaker B: Really? I'm not. [01:21:33] Speaker A: Let's just do the gong. He's got a right. You gotta write your set. I gotta hang this tv. You gotta write your set for the open mic, get the bar ready. [01:21:43] Speaker C: What are the ratings? And what's the next comic? [01:21:46] Speaker B: Jesus Christ. Why don't I finish it by myself? [01:21:51] Speaker C: Yeah. [01:21:51] Speaker B: What do I hit, a button? [01:21:52] Speaker A: Yeah, we'll just walk out. [01:21:54] Speaker B: I give. I give Davitel's road work. Four and a half out of five. [01:21:59] Speaker C: If you got more to say, you can go ahead and say. [01:22:00] Speaker B: I'll leave. Vegan mushroom pillow fight. D by See you, but cheesesteak. I give it four and a half out of five. Hints of slavery. [01:22:17] Speaker A: All right. I give it. I. I give it. I give it five out of five. Tag teaming truckers on a pool table. [01:22:30] Speaker B: Okay, Five out of five. [01:22:32] Speaker A: Yeah, it's. It's perfect. It's perfection. [01:22:34] Speaker C: It's. [01:22:35] Speaker B: It is. You know what? I. I'm giving it five out of five for. Yeah, I was reluctant because I didn't want to go out on a limb. But you did. I'm going to give it five out of five. [01:22:41] Speaker A: Production. It's got some great little twists. The material, you can't fault it. Yeah, it's brisk. [01:22:47] Speaker B: It's Brisk. [01:22:48] Speaker A: You never feel like, oh, he's getting bogged down. [01:22:50] Speaker B: No, it doesn't go to long stories. Just bing, bing, bing, bing. Sex talk for 40 minutes. Pretty much. [01:22:57] Speaker A: Pretty much. Yeah. This is a. But you know what? He's bringing something to it. Those little turns of phrase. [01:23:05] Speaker B: It's. It's high minded sex talk. It's filthy, but it's also creative. It's not just. Yeah, Khalil kicking you. [01:23:15] Speaker A: Which you also like, though. [01:23:16] Speaker B: I do, I do, yeah. Well, we'll get some more filth next week when we watch the legendary comedian Andrew Dice Clay in nineteen nine. 1989's the Dice Man Cometh. [01:23:32] Speaker A: I like the title. [01:23:34] Speaker B: That's great. Have you seen it? [01:23:36] Speaker A: Why would I have watched it when we're reviewing it next week? [01:23:39] Speaker B: Okay, but you might have seen it already. It's a classic. [01:23:42] Speaker A: No, I've only seen the Day the Laughter Died part of it. [01:23:46] Speaker B: What's that? [01:23:49] Speaker A: Yeah, that's his comedy special. [01:23:51] Speaker B: Oh, then this comment. I thought it was a movie. [01:23:53] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:23:53] Speaker B: All right, you go over there and gong out of here. [01:23:55] Speaker A: Do humm a tune while I walk over there. [01:24:18] Speaker B: You don't even know how to work the board. [01:24:19] Speaker A: No, I just buy this. Hang on. [01:24:23] Speaker B: Just unplug it. Well, the show is over. Christian left a while ago and Mark thought he could shut things down, but he doesn't know how. So it's just me here. And I want to say this. If the. This thing is still recording, that we've taken into consideration the feedback given by our listeners and we are going to level set this and try to make improvements to the. To the program. As much as it hurt to hear that we're doing a lot of things wrong. Was good to hear. Right. And woke me up from my slumber. Yeah. I'm keeping the show going. And tune in next week. The show will be even better. Bigger and better. Christian's back. [01:25:13] Speaker C: What did he say while I was gone? [01:25:14] Speaker B: I was just talking about, you know, trying to make the show better and everything. [01:25:17] Speaker C: You didn't finish your kiwi. [01:25:18] Speaker B: Yeah, then I went to the pie. All right. [01:25:22] Speaker C: Put the kiwi in the pie. Put the kiwi. [01:25:25] Speaker B: Put the lime in the coconut. The kiwi in the pie. [01:25:30] Speaker C: Wait, what's the next comedian do? We already. [01:25:32] Speaker B: Andrew Dice Clay. The Dice Man Cometh. [01:25:36] Speaker C: No way. I just watched that. [01:25:37] Speaker B: You did? [01:25:38] Speaker C: That's crazy. [01:25:39] Speaker B: It's gonna be great. [01:25:49] Speaker C: Master. As honest one.