Review: Live at The Purple Onion, Zach Galfianakis

[00:00:09] Speaker A: All right. We'll do the other show now. [00:00:10] Speaker B: Yeah. And he's got a. You got a hustle. Right? So. Yeah, we can't. [00:00:13] Speaker C: He's got beers to put away. [00:00:15] Speaker A: Do you need me to help you put the beers away? [00:00:16] Speaker C: No, it's. It's really not. It doesn't take that long. I just. I. I like to give myself enough time. I don't like to rush through things. [00:00:23] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:00:23] Speaker A: I'll help you decide. You gotta fill a W2. Yeah, W2. [00:00:26] Speaker C: W9. [00:00:27] Speaker A: W9. For helping him. [00:00:28] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:00:30] Speaker A: All right. Welcome to the show. We don't ever really do a welcome anymore. [00:00:35] Speaker B: It's very off putting, that T. It's like you're some sort of fashion statement. [00:00:40] Speaker C: The old cartoons. [00:00:41] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:00:42] Speaker A: Virgil album, off white. I keep the tags on my clothes. That'll be a new thing. People leaving the price tags on their clothes. [00:00:48] Speaker B: Yeah. Did you ever see that Key and Peele sketch about the. The baseball hats, maybe? [00:00:56] Speaker C: I haven't. [00:00:57] Speaker B: So there used to be a thing where people would leave the sticker on. [00:01:00] Speaker C: Yeah, I remember this. [00:01:01] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:01:01] Speaker C: I didn't know they stopped. [00:01:02] Speaker B: Key and Peele did a sketch where it's like, first of all, like, one of them's got the sticker. Then the next thing, the guy comes in and he's wearing it in a plastic bag, like he just walked out of the shop. Then the next one, I can't remember. It's like it's in a car, still in the box. And then the sketch ends with, like, a woman. He walk. Walks in, and there's a woman sitting on top of his head, like. And don't ask me how they pull it off. And she's actually making that. [00:01:32] Speaker A: That was great. I didn't see that. That's good. From the old sketchup. [00:01:36] Speaker B: Oh, my God. Those. The Key. I never really watched Key and Peele, but those American football. Name ones that they do just. Oh, my God, I'm fucking. Even now. I can watch one and I'm rolling on the floor laughing. [00:01:51] Speaker A: Is that where they say, like, where they're from? [00:01:53] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. They're just, like. [00:01:54] Speaker A: Their names are crazy. [00:01:55] Speaker C: The names progressively. [00:01:59] Speaker B: And then. Because Heather likes it, because there's a Green Bay packers edition. [00:02:03] Speaker C: Oh, yeah, that's right. [00:02:04] Speaker B: Aaron Rodgers and a couple of, like, the ones with wacky names are in there. [00:02:09] Speaker A: That's fine. Well, we won't be talking about Key and Peele today. We'll be talking about Christian's picture pick, Mr. Zach Galafianakis. [00:02:20] Speaker C: That's right. [00:02:21] Speaker A: Later on. But we've got We've got a lot of treats on the table here. We've got last week's heart, right. This one says. Does that say buy in bulk? That last week, two weeks ago, Buy in bulk? Possibly. I think that's what it says. We got candy hearts. We've got Christian brought in Wiley Wallaby. We're giving free advertising out here. I've never had lemonade. Licorice. [00:02:49] Speaker C: Yeah, it's interesting, isn't it? Yeah, I got that. In a Too Good to Go package from Go Grocer. There is a service called Too Good to Go. Where restaurants, let's say you have a pizzeria and at the end of the night you end up, like, throwing out or trying to give away all the extra pizza that you've got. Too Good to Go. You can sign up if you're that pizzeria and you say, okay, from 8 to 9 o' clock for $5. If you buy a $5 reservation, you show up and we'll just give you, like, all the pizza we possibly can. So it's a good way to. [00:03:19] Speaker A: Wait a minute. [00:03:20] Speaker B: This made it in the box. This is the expiration. [00:03:22] Speaker C: This is from Go Grocer, which is across the street from Galway Bay. And they do too good to Go. So I'll always get two bags from there every other Wednesday when I perform at Galway Bay. And you never know what you're gonna get in there. [00:03:35] Speaker A: And how much do you pay? [00:03:36] Speaker C: It's $5 a bag. [00:03:38] Speaker A: And you got this and what else? [00:03:39] Speaker C: I got that. I got meatloaf with mashed potatoes and broccoli. [00:03:43] Speaker A: Also expired. The meatloaf. [00:03:44] Speaker C: No, it is usually it's like within a couple days. They gotta get rid of it. Right. [00:03:50] Speaker A: It's cooked meatloaf. [00:03:52] Speaker C: Cooked meatloaf, yeah. And you'll get everything. I got a whole thing of ginger roots. I got some broccoli. [00:03:58] Speaker A: Nice. Nice. [00:03:58] Speaker C: Yep. I got a box of Kind bars. I guess sometimes I'll just throw in things that just aren't selling well. I mean, these don't really have an expiration date. They're sealed, you know. I know. Maybe they say they do, but come on. [00:04:09] Speaker A: They're not expired yet. February 24th. [00:04:12] Speaker C: In a sealed plastic bag like that. They're not. They're never going to expire. [00:04:15] Speaker A: They make you sign a waiver in case you get ill from this. [00:04:18] Speaker C: Expired. I'm sure. I'm sure. I signed it by clicking I agree to your terms and conditions. [00:04:22] Speaker A: That's so cool. They didn't know that. And you're saying They a pizza place also? [00:04:25] Speaker C: Yeah, There's a Chinese restaurant around the corner. For me. It's a buffet where it's like. If you like, it's like $5 and, like, just show up at the end of the night and you can just like, fill up whatever you want. However, I did that once and I got real sick, so I didn't do it again. Yeah, I mean, that's just that one Chinese restaurant, though. I don't want that to be on too. Good to Go's your resume. [00:04:42] Speaker A: I didn't know about that. That's exciting. All right, we'll talk offline more about where you find all these deals. I like a good deal. You, as a skin flint, would love this kind of thing. Have you ever engaged in this kind of. [00:04:52] Speaker C: No. [00:04:52] Speaker B: My sister was telling me about it in commerce. [00:04:55] Speaker A: They have it over there. [00:04:56] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. [00:04:57] Speaker A: We do something similar in my family with Dunkin Donuts. We go to Dunkin Donuts right at close, and we go into their garbage and they have trash bags filled with donuts, and we grab them and we bring them home and we sort them out. [00:05:15] Speaker C: Like Elaine's boyfriend on Seinfeld. [00:05:18] Speaker A: I don't remember that. [00:05:18] Speaker C: Yeah, she's dating a broke guy. She thought he was married. [00:05:21] Speaker B: Oh, yeah, that guy. [00:05:21] Speaker A: I remember that guy wasn't the Wiz. [00:05:23] Speaker C: No, no, no, that wasn't the Wiz. She suspected he was married, but he was just broke. [00:05:29] Speaker A: Who was the actor that played him? It was somebody. [00:05:30] Speaker C: Oh, I have no idea. I don't know. [00:05:32] Speaker A: No, he was dumpster diving. [00:05:34] Speaker C: Yeah, he was dumpster diving. And he gave her a bear claw. And she was about to break up with him, but he said, you're the bear claw of my life, Elaine. And she decided to stay with him. And then somebody threw out a bucket of trash and the water sprayed on her face as she hit the bear claw and smiled. [00:05:49] Speaker A: We should have a weekly segment. I feel like we've talked about a lot of Seinfeld. [00:05:53] Speaker B: I never watched it. [00:05:55] Speaker C: Everything's relatable to Seinfeld. [00:05:59] Speaker A: But we also have here, in terms of food, we've got croissants, which Mark will not eat. He said right off, straight away, I won't eat that croissant. [00:06:07] Speaker B: Buttery. [00:06:08] Speaker A: Because you don't like butter. [00:06:09] Speaker B: Don't like butter. [00:06:11] Speaker A: Nothing buttered? [00:06:12] Speaker B: Nope. [00:06:13] Speaker A: No corn on the cob with butter? [00:06:14] Speaker B: No. No butter. [00:06:16] Speaker A: No butter on the popcorn. [00:06:17] Speaker B: No butter shall pass. [00:06:19] Speaker A: Really? How about alternative butter? [00:06:25] Speaker B: Yeah, I will have some of that stuff if. If I really. [00:06:28] Speaker C: Croc. [00:06:29] Speaker A: Country croc. [00:06:30] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:06:31] Speaker A: I I use Smart balance. [00:06:33] Speaker B: Do you have. I Can't Believe It's Not Butter in America? [00:06:36] Speaker C: Sure, yeah, of course. [00:06:37] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah. [00:06:38] Speaker C: It was probably made here. [00:06:39] Speaker A: We used to have parquet. I don't know if they have that anymore. Parquet. Remember the. The thing would talk the. [00:06:45] Speaker B: I quite like margarine, but anytime you have margarine, some asshole will go, you know that it's only one molecule away from plastic. [00:06:54] Speaker A: Margarine. Yes, margarine. [00:06:57] Speaker B: Margarine is literally one molecule away from plastic. What's so funny about me saying I've never had margarine? [00:07:04] Speaker C: I've never even heard of margarine. [00:07:05] Speaker A: I've never heard of margarine. What do you mean? Are you talking about margarine? [00:07:11] Speaker C: I've heard of margarine. [00:07:13] Speaker A: Oh, oh, mar. Yes, margarine. [00:07:15] Speaker C: Margarine's kind of like butter, Mark. You should try that. [00:07:18] Speaker B: So is margarine, but is that a fruit? [00:07:21] Speaker A: It's like a tan. [00:07:22] Speaker C: It's like a tangerine, but it's one [00:07:23] Speaker B: molecule away from plastic and that's why flies won't land on it. [00:07:28] Speaker A: Really? [00:07:28] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:07:30] Speaker A: Well, tune in next week for more British science talk. Okay, so those are gonna go uneaten. Maybe the staff tonight will eat it. Who's on? [00:07:39] Speaker C: And also, it's just me. Just you? [00:07:41] Speaker B: Also, cottage cheese is a residue. It's not a cheese at all. [00:07:46] Speaker C: Oh, yeah. [00:07:46] Speaker B: It's a byproduct. [00:07:47] Speaker C: Yeah, sure. [00:07:48] Speaker A: Say what now? [00:07:49] Speaker B: Cottage cheese is a byproduct. [00:07:51] Speaker A: It's a curdling of the something. [00:07:52] Speaker C: Right? [00:07:53] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. [00:07:53] Speaker A: I don't like cottage cheese. [00:07:54] Speaker C: I do, I do, yeah. I love it. [00:07:56] Speaker B: I'll go for it. Yeah. [00:07:57] Speaker A: Is it good for you? Some people think it is. [00:07:59] Speaker B: I think it is. [00:08:00] Speaker C: In moderation. [00:08:00] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:08:01] Speaker C: It's like any. Well, like a lot of things. [00:08:03] Speaker A: It's not fatty, right? [00:08:05] Speaker C: I mean, I think it's high in cholesterol. [00:08:08] Speaker A: I askew dairy. [00:08:10] Speaker C: You what? [00:08:11] Speaker A: I skew it. Shoe it. How do they say shoe in Britain? [00:08:15] Speaker B: You shouldn't really have dairy cuz it's just not meant for us. Water and hormones. [00:08:21] Speaker A: Yeah, it's meant for the. The animals from which it comes. [00:08:23] Speaker C: It's hard to avoid cheese sometimes though. [00:08:25] Speaker B: It is though. Cheese is bloody nice. [00:08:27] Speaker C: So good. Especially when it's melted. Come on. [00:08:28] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah, yeah, sure. It tastes good. [00:08:30] Speaker B: But I, I told the Mrs. I was like, milk is just water and hormones. And she got really annoyed. She's like, no, no, no, it's good for bones. Blah, blah, blah. [00:08:40] Speaker A: Calcium, yes, that stuff. [00:08:43] Speaker B: And I said, someone I Can't remember who said. I said to him, well, where do you get your. Where'd you get your calcium? Because we get it where the cows get it from the vegetables. [00:08:53] Speaker A: Yeah. You get calcium many other ways. [00:08:54] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:08:55] Speaker A: If you get it from milk. Yeah. Well, yeah, it makes me think about, you know, if. If cow milk is for baby cows, breast milk is for babies. And they say, yeah, you shouldn't have cow milk or dairy or whatever. But what if we made like cheese and yogurt out of breast milk for adults? [00:09:18] Speaker C: Sure. Somebody has to have done that, right? [00:09:21] Speaker A: I don't know. But, like, why wouldn't we produce milk for ourselves that benefits our gut health? [00:09:28] Speaker C: Seems cannibalistic. [00:09:29] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:09:29] Speaker A: Does it? [00:09:30] Speaker C: Yeah, a little bit. Something about it just seems wrong. Even though I understand why it could be argued that it's not or that it is. I guess either way, something about it just feels off. I don't think nobody would buy it. [00:09:39] Speaker A: You would need a pizza made with breast milk. [00:09:41] Speaker C: No. I don't know. I tried bite, but I wouldn't. I wouldn't order one. [00:09:45] Speaker B: It would seem revolting. What about almond milk? If. Has anyone ever had that? [00:09:49] Speaker A: What do you mean? I only have. [00:09:50] Speaker C: Can you make cheese out of almond milk? [00:09:52] Speaker B: Probably not, right? [00:09:54] Speaker A: You can't. You can make cheese out of pretty much anything, right? [00:09:58] Speaker C: Really? [00:09:58] Speaker A: I mean. Well, that's not true, but cashew. There's cashew cheese. There's cheese made from almonds. Any kind of nut can be cheese. [00:10:06] Speaker B: Mind you, nuts are bad because of the sheer volume of water. It's killing California, isn't it? [00:10:12] Speaker A: Well, the production of almonds for almond milk is an issue, is an environmental issue, but neither here nor there. If your Mrs. Is produced you a glass of breast milk, would you have trouble drinking it? [00:10:29] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:10:29] Speaker A: You would because of its taste? Not knowing it? No, just because it came from her concept. Yeah. How about you, friend? [00:10:38] Speaker C: I would. I'll try it, but I don't. I wouldn't want to make it a regular thing. I would try it out of curiosity. [00:10:44] Speaker A: You heard it here. Christian McCann loves breast milk. That's my Larry King. [00:10:53] Speaker C: Yeah, it's true. It's my favorite. [00:10:57] Speaker A: I would, but it seems taboo. [00:11:00] Speaker C: That's what I'm saying. [00:11:01] Speaker A: It's just the taboo nature of it. But it's erotic to me as well. [00:11:07] Speaker B: It sounds like. Yeah, it sounds like that niche porn, you know, weirdos get into pregnancy porn. [00:11:13] Speaker A: Oh, you into that? No, no, I used to. How about you, friend? [00:11:18] Speaker C: Used to date somebody. We had a pact that if we could ever Afford it. We would surgically get a piece of muscle removed from our. Whichever one could afford it, and the other person would try it. [00:11:29] Speaker A: Piece of. Oh, like Cannibal would fry it up and eat it. [00:11:32] Speaker B: Remember that scene in. In Hannibal where he fries? [00:11:39] Speaker A: That's a good one. That's. [00:11:40] Speaker B: That. [00:11:40] Speaker A: That. [00:11:41] Speaker B: Whoa. [00:11:41] Speaker A: That warrants another look. [00:11:43] Speaker B: I did not sleep for days after that. That came at me like, whoa. That whole thing. That whole. The whole of that film was absolutely revolting. [00:11:57] Speaker A: Yeah. That is a rough movie. Very rough. You need to watch that, right? They really went. They went for the gold on that one. [00:12:07] Speaker B: Oh, my God. [00:12:10] Speaker A: We got some listener comments coming in off the discussion board. Want to hear them? Yeah. Okay. I enjoyed this week's pod. Mark showed real vulnerability. Made me like him. [00:12:26] Speaker B: Is that the guy that thought I was a smug twat? [00:12:28] Speaker A: That was from Tom. Tom. Pat Scarrett. [00:12:31] Speaker B: All right. [00:12:34] Speaker A: This is from Cheeto. I don't know. His name is Cheeto. Bill is very woke as a moderator. Everyone that isn't gay, trans, or black is maga. [00:12:47] Speaker C: What? [00:12:48] Speaker A: It's saying that I'm woke and labeling everyone that isn't gay, trans, or black maga. Now, you guys like to. [00:12:54] Speaker C: Is that sarcasm to be. [00:12:55] Speaker A: I don't know. Shane Gillis is the best. Stand up alive today. Mark is a snowflake. I would have liked to have met him before he got so jaded. [00:13:09] Speaker C: Who's that from, Peter? [00:13:12] Speaker A: Whoever that is. [00:13:13] Speaker C: Whoever that is. [00:13:14] Speaker A: Yeah, that looks like. Yeah. Then the discussion board went quiet. So there you go. That is listener feedback. [00:13:23] Speaker C: I'm glad. At least we're invoking a response. [00:13:26] Speaker A: Yeah, we're getting a response. Any new listeners you guys know about this week? [00:13:30] Speaker C: No, no, no. [00:13:31] Speaker A: That's tuning in. [00:13:31] Speaker B: Texted anyone? [00:13:32] Speaker A: Yeah, we really got to get the. The publicity train going for this program. You know, I think it's time. I think we've hit our stride. I think it's time, you know, [00:13:44] Speaker B: go for it. [00:13:47] Speaker A: Okay. [00:13:51] Speaker B: Oh, we were gonna do it last week and then muffed the punt, as you say in America, didn't we? [00:13:56] Speaker A: Yeah, we wanted to get her Beth to do a little promo for us. It was too much. Jeez. I couldn't even. You shut me down completely. Completely talking. I wasn't gonna ask her for anything else. Okay. And then I want to thank you guys for pivoting this week. I had a family emergency that required me to leave town abruptly on Monday. My son broke his leg in college, and I rushed to his aid. Why are you looking at me? [00:14:22] Speaker B: Your kids are like stuntmen. Or something. It's just one injury after injury, after. [00:14:29] Speaker A: Oh, yeah, that's right. My other kid, it was one another week before he hurt his knee. [00:14:33] Speaker B: And then you texted me from casualty one time about some TV program. [00:14:38] Speaker A: Oh, yeah. [00:14:39] Speaker B: And I was like, that was a [00:14:41] Speaker A: year ago this weekend, actually, when my son had his fingers. I have many children. [00:14:46] Speaker B: Yeah, they're all different. Yeah. God, your kids are just in there. [00:14:51] Speaker A: Accident prone. Yeah, it's. It's tough. [00:14:55] Speaker C: How did he break his leg? [00:14:56] Speaker A: He was playing basketball, pickup basketball at the rec center. Landed on another gentleman's foot, snapped his fibula. [00:15:03] Speaker B: Oh, Jesus. [00:15:04] Speaker A: Well, snapped is dramatic. He broke it. Okay. And so as a. As a father, I felt the need to drive six hours, seven hours straight away to Columbia, Missouri, to help him for a couple days. Was that. [00:15:20] Speaker B: So he's still there? [00:15:22] Speaker A: Yeah, he's still there. [00:15:23] Speaker B: It is a bit helicopter. [00:15:24] Speaker A: Is it? Yeah, I wondered if it was. [00:15:26] Speaker B: I knackered my leg up big time. When I was at university, it was all I could do to stay in the house. My old man virtually threw the crutches out to get the fuck. Get back to Leicester. [00:15:38] Speaker A: Oh, you came home? [00:15:39] Speaker B: I had to come. Well, I got injured racing motorcycles, so I was staying at home that night. So we come back, I. They hadn't got any crutches at the hospital, so I had to use brooms, like under my hands and stuff. So I'm in agony. I'm in agony. [00:15:57] Speaker A: Who gave you the brooms? The hospital? [00:15:59] Speaker B: No, my dad got them in the back of the car. So I'm in agony. And I was scheduled to. To ride the next day. And I literally, if I was vertical, it was like I wanted to die. It was agony. And my old man says to me, because if I knew I'd just whack it for all the painkillers and ride. It was like I could barely, like, grimace. [00:16:22] Speaker A: Get it back on the bike. [00:16:23] Speaker B: Yeah. So I would. I'd been at home a week, and it. He was basically like, get the hell out of it. Like, I was having to drive over to Rugby for physiotherapy, and after two physios, he said, I'm not driving you there anymore. You got to do it yourself. So I'm on crutches, crutching to the [00:16:42] Speaker A: car on the brooms. [00:16:44] Speaker B: Yeah, driving. Driving over to Rugby, doing my physio and then driving back. [00:16:49] Speaker A: There's no way you were crutching around on brooms. [00:16:51] Speaker B: That's just not for about a week. [00:16:55] Speaker C: Only for. Only for. [00:16:56] Speaker A: Did you. Did you kind of makeshift. Do something to the broom. So you just had the. The bristles under your arms? [00:17:03] Speaker B: No, I think we wrapped towels around it or something. [00:17:05] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:17:08] Speaker A: Jesus, what a hard scrabble life you live. [00:17:10] Speaker C: Didn't the bottom of them kind of slide on? Whatever. Like if you're on a hardwood floor. [00:17:15] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:17:16] Speaker C: You find little rubber nuts. [00:17:17] Speaker B: Yeah, we found those little rubber things, you know, like you could find all that better. [00:17:22] Speaker C: Easier than crutches. [00:17:23] Speaker A: Is this not painting a picture? Is this not explaining a lot, though, with him? [00:17:28] Speaker C: A ton. There's always a layer, Jerry. [00:17:29] Speaker A: Rigging of everything. [00:17:30] Speaker C: Right. [00:17:31] Speaker A: In his life. Now you know where it comes from. [00:17:33] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:17:33] Speaker A: The old boy giving him brooms for crutches. I don't. [00:17:37] Speaker B: Well, the nhs. Nhs. It was Margaret Thatcher's nhs. There was no. There was inadequate supplies. [00:17:43] Speaker A: Universal healthcare. [00:17:44] Speaker C: Yes. [00:17:44] Speaker B: But in the end, I got some crutches. You did? Yeah. [00:17:47] Speaker A: We. [00:17:47] Speaker C: Now, by the time it healed up [00:17:49] Speaker A: in this disposable world we live in now, we use the crutches for a couple days. Just throw them in the alley. [00:17:54] Speaker B: You get them in the thrift. First time I saw them. First time I saw him in the thrift store here, I'm like, holy shit. [00:18:00] Speaker C: Better buy. [00:18:01] Speaker B: Yeah, I better get case. [00:18:02] Speaker A: I need them. [00:18:02] Speaker B: Yep. [00:18:03] Speaker C: You never know. [00:18:05] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:18:07] Speaker A: All right. So anyway, thanks for. And I wanted to be here yesterday. You guys were good to. [00:18:12] Speaker C: Yeah, of course. [00:18:13] Speaker B: Yeah. Thanks. [00:18:14] Speaker A: So if you're. In case you're wondering, it might be a different show because it's not at noon and it's not on a Wednesday. Here we are Thursday evening. [00:18:21] Speaker C: Yep. [00:18:22] Speaker A: Early evening. [00:18:23] Speaker C: Yep. [00:18:24] Speaker A: And we're all looking at our watches because Christian has to put away the beer. [00:18:28] Speaker C: I got to put the beer away [00:18:29] Speaker A: before a tonight show. All right, well, I. I still owe you for the Beth Stelling tickets. How would you like me to pay you for those? [00:18:41] Speaker B: No, that's fine. [00:18:42] Speaker A: No, no, no, it's fine. [00:18:44] Speaker B: I already did the settlement. [00:18:46] Speaker A: What settlement? [00:18:47] Speaker B: With Beth. [00:18:49] Speaker A: I know, but we just. I'll give you the money, and you have to put it in the coffers. [00:18:53] Speaker C: Pay her directly. Yeah, send her a Zelda. [00:18:57] Speaker A: I need to pay her directly. Put me in touch with her. I can ask her the remainder of the questions. Yeah, but. Yeah, that. We saw Beth Stelling this weekend, and what a show. She was fantastic. That had to bring in a lot of money. The bar was packed. [00:19:15] Speaker C: Yeah. We'd set a record. [00:19:16] Speaker A: I had asked the waitress to have you make me a snowball, but. [00:19:20] Speaker C: Oh, really? [00:19:20] Speaker A: No, I didn't. [00:19:21] Speaker C: Oh, okay. Yeah, she did Come Back to the bar saying how kind you and your wife were, though. [00:19:26] Speaker A: Oh, yes, she was very nice. [00:19:28] Speaker B: Yeah, we set a bar record on Saturday, right? [00:19:30] Speaker C: That's right. [00:19:30] Speaker A: Hey, I paid my bill. I don't want to get into the particulars of the bill. I paid my bill and then I get like. I woke up the next morning and I had the receipt from the bill. It must send it to my. Yeah. For my credit card information, Right? [00:19:43] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:19:44] Speaker A: And then I was charged another. I got another bill for like $4 for soda in a tip. I didn't have any soda. [00:19:54] Speaker C: What? [00:19:54] Speaker A: Yeah, I'll show it to you later. I don't care about the $4. [00:19:58] Speaker C: Yeah, sure. No, but I wouldn't like. [00:19:59] Speaker A: How the hell did I get charged for that? [00:20:01] Speaker C: You shouldn't have. Yeah, because the way the system works, once you pay like your. Your name's out of there, you're gone. [00:20:07] Speaker A: Yeah, I would think so. I'll show you that later. But I thought like, I looked and I like. I was like, oh, Christian, he's trying not to charge me for my drinks. And gave me a four dollar bill. But then I looked at my other bill was there too. And then there was another separate bill for $4. [00:20:20] Speaker C: Something went. [00:20:20] Speaker A: Soda and a thing. [00:20:21] Speaker C: Yeah, you shouldn't have gotten charged for sodas and a tip. Something happened. But that would mean your card would have to be entered twice. I don't understand. Let's look at this. [00:20:29] Speaker A: Yeah, [00:20:35] Speaker B: I was thinking maybe it was green room, but then he wouldn't get charged. [00:20:39] Speaker A: Oh, green room charged. [00:20:41] Speaker B: I don't know. [00:20:41] Speaker C: Hey, no, it couldn't be that. [00:20:43] Speaker B: I can look at it on download. [00:20:46] Speaker A: Did Beth Stelling leave behind any of those socks? My wife wanted a pair of those socks. We never got them. [00:20:52] Speaker B: I think I left at. When the merch stall cranked up. You did? [00:20:56] Speaker A: No, you were here. No, you left. [00:20:57] Speaker B: I think she gave away most of them at the. She was at the Q and A. Yeah. She was worried about charging that we charged for the Q and A. And she said, oh, I'll give. Give some merch away or something. [00:21:10] Speaker A: Yeah, okay. That was nice. Yeah, she's a nice. She's a nice lass. Can you say that? [00:21:18] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:21:18] Speaker A: Has that been banned in England? You can't call a woman a lass. [00:21:21] Speaker B: No, lass is like a term of endearment. [00:21:23] Speaker A: Like a gal. [00:21:24] Speaker C: It's a good thing. [00:21:25] Speaker A: Can't say gal over here. [00:21:26] Speaker C: She was really nice. [00:21:27] Speaker A: She was awesome. And she killed. She was. [00:21:29] Speaker B: I mean, I think I just see any of it was. [00:21:31] Speaker D: You didn't either. [00:21:32] Speaker A: Right. Because you were. [00:21:33] Speaker C: No, I was. I was. I was busy. [00:21:34] Speaker A: You were slammed. [00:21:35] Speaker C: Yeah, I walked into the back room where the monitor is, and I saw it first. I just, like, saw what she. I was like, oh, she's up on stage. That's all I saw. Okay, I gotta go. [00:21:44] Speaker B: My. My issue was, jeez. So Chicago weather just pivoted back to, you know, spring. And we can't cool that room down. It just gets too damn. Because what happened was we had three busy shows in a row. So normally it would start. We ice the. Out of it down to 66, 67. Because as soon as the body start going in there, heat nut climbing. But we had. We had two busy shows before that show. So it started. [00:22:16] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:22:16] Speaker B: Five degrees more than it should have been. [00:22:19] Speaker A: Yeah, I. I didn't feel hot. I. Because I have anemia, and I had my coat on the whole time. Like, the woman in the front row, who. She. It was hilarious. This woman said this. This couple sat front row. They were drinking winks, by the way, which are selling like hotcakes. I believe that. Wink. [00:22:35] Speaker C: Drink. Whatever that is. Oh, the. The heirloom. [00:22:37] Speaker A: Phenomenal. [00:22:38] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:22:39] Speaker A: I almost careened off the road on the way home from that wink. [00:22:42] Speaker C: Wonderful. [00:22:44] Speaker A: She had her winter coat on. Did you catch any of that? And Beth just kept going at her like, what? And she wouldn't laugh. The woman didn't laugh at all. Staring at her, like, in her winter coat, she's like, are you ill? Is there something I need to worry about? Like, are you sick? And she just kept trying to break her, and she wouldn't. Yeah, but what a great show. What a great place the Lincoln Lodge is. You know, it is a wonderful place. [00:23:09] Speaker C: I do love weekends like that, when everything's just kind of clicking and everything's. Everything's going on and, you know, you got to prepare a lot ahead of time and execute it. Execute it. [00:23:18] Speaker B: I have a crash, though, after. Oh, yeah. When I'm in the building. When I'm in the building and it's pulsating. Is that's the word? [00:23:27] Speaker A: Throbbing. [00:23:28] Speaker B: Throbbing with human energy. We're getting very. But then when I go home the next morning, depression sets up. I'm like a. Whoa. You know what I mean? I get. [00:23:44] Speaker A: Yeah. You know, I was thinking about how, like, last week or what. Whenever you're talking about how when you come on and do this program, you talk a lot, and then that makes you depressed. Yeah. Right. But then. But you don't. What if you didn't talk as much? Right. You There's. You have a need to talk. Right. Because you come in here and you talk, and I love listening to talk, Christian. I love all the British talk and all the different euphemisms that we don't understand. And you go on and on about stuff, a lot of stuff we don't even care about. Right. But we just like to hear you talk. [00:24:12] Speaker C: Right. [00:24:12] Speaker A: And you like to talk. I don't think I. I think you do. [00:24:15] Speaker C: I think so, too. Right. [00:24:16] Speaker A: He likes it. [00:24:17] Speaker B: No, I've had this. You feel bad about it. [00:24:20] Speaker A: No. [00:24:21] Speaker C: You don't. Like, when you woke up Sunday morning and you were feeling depressed, was your mood lifted by the balloon that you found? [00:24:29] Speaker B: I never found it. [00:24:30] Speaker C: No. [00:24:31] Speaker B: Didn't Jordan tell you? [00:24:32] Speaker D: No. [00:24:32] Speaker C: Really? Damn it. [00:24:33] Speaker A: What are you talking about? [00:24:34] Speaker C: All right. Before we left on Saturday, the bar crew was just about to walk out the door, and there was still a Valentine's Day balloon attached to the bar that Jordan, one of the other bar back that night, had brought in from Walgreens. So I had written on it a note that said, good morrow. And I spent a good amount of time putting the correct amount of staple. I stapled it to the ribbon of the balloon. I spent a lot of time putting the staples enough so that the balloon would just kind of hang in the middle of the room. [00:25:01] Speaker A: Just float? [00:25:02] Speaker C: Yep, just float in the middle of the room. But enough so that, like, overnight, if it did lose helium, it would just kind of center right in the middle. And then I even stayed behind because then I realized, like, some things still weren't done. Like, I had to switch some tables around and stuff. And, like, we're already clocked out. The other two already left. And I'm kind of watching his flight pattern, you know, like, as. As the air current of the vents goes through the building. And it kept. It just. It wound up in the same place that was not where I wanted, so I had to be really careful where I placed it. And it seemed like it was staying there. And the whole next day, I'm thinking, I wonder if Mark found that balloon, you know, and I haven't heard anything about it. Why? [00:25:33] Speaker A: Was it for his benefit to find it? [00:25:35] Speaker C: Yeah, it was just a, you know, just a good morrow message hanging from a Valentine's Day balloon floating ominously around in the middle of Lincoln Lodge. [00:25:44] Speaker A: And you. Your hope was that he would find it the next day? [00:25:45] Speaker C: Yeah, right, exactly. [00:25:46] Speaker A: Because you come in on Sunday morning [00:25:47] Speaker C: like a little Easter egg, you know, [00:25:48] Speaker B: I don't know where the hell it [00:25:50] Speaker C: went because George, it's gotta be above the. It's probably above this podcast studio right now. [00:25:54] Speaker B: Yeah. Because Jordan said, did you find the balloon? And I cover, right. [00:26:00] Speaker C: I figured there's no way you weren't gonna see. I left it right in the middle of the hallway outside the. [00:26:03] Speaker A: Maybe somebody said, fucking, no, no, Jordan [00:26:06] Speaker B: went and found it. [00:26:07] Speaker C: Oh, Jordan did. Okay. [00:26:09] Speaker B: Jordan went and found it. [00:26:10] Speaker C: Where was it? [00:26:11] Speaker B: I don't know. But I said to him, I said to Jordan, I said to Jordan, I've covered everything, every inch of this, you know, because I'm doing the toilets, I'm doing this and that, and I don't wear that balloon. [00:26:27] Speaker C: I've talked to Jordan three or four times since then. It hasn't come up. I. Now I know who to ask. [00:26:32] Speaker A: Jordan said, so where is the balloon now? [00:26:36] Speaker C: Probably the trash. [00:26:37] Speaker B: That was a nice little mylas. [00:26:39] Speaker A: Yeah, Nice little thing to do. I thought you knew he'd be depressed. Yep, he was. He was great. [00:26:46] Speaker B: He. [00:26:47] Speaker A: I don't. You weren't. I don't know if you were here. No, you didn't. You didn't come back here. But he brought me and my missus back here. We sat in the. In the studio because she'd never seen it back here. She got a big kick out of that, you know, sitting in. In that seat. And we did a little. Should have recorded it. [00:27:00] Speaker C: Yeah, you should have. Bonus episode. [00:27:02] Speaker A: That was fun. So thank you for doing that. [00:27:05] Speaker C: I owe your wife an apology. [00:27:07] Speaker A: Why? [00:27:07] Speaker C: Because when we shook her, I shook her hand. I shook her hand too hard. Okay, this is what happened. So I. I put my thumb. Somehow ended up in the middle of the back of the other side of her palm, you know, and I squeezed too hard. And I know it, and she knows it because she kind of pulled her hand away a little bit. [00:27:23] Speaker A: Oh, really? [00:27:24] Speaker C: But we acted like it didn't happen, but we both know it happened. And I even recreated this when I was telling somebody else about it. I said, I shook his wife's hand too hard. And they said, well, show me. And so I showed them how he did it. And even they said, oh, that is. [00:27:35] Speaker D: That's the hell you doing, Alpha. [00:27:37] Speaker C: I know, I know. It was unintentional. So this is my apology. I'm sorry. [00:27:42] Speaker A: Take my wife. Move. Yeah, mine. [00:27:46] Speaker C: Maybe it was subconscious. [00:27:47] Speaker A: Well, she didn't mention anything about that. [00:27:49] Speaker C: Well, yeah, because it's embarrassing. [00:27:50] Speaker A: Well, I know she would have mentioned. She would mention everything, but she did mention how nonplussed. I don't know if that's the right word. Here she was to meet you, Christian. [00:28:02] Speaker C: What does that mean? [00:28:03] Speaker A: Non plus. I think of it as meaning. It's probably not the right word, but, like, confused, you know, when you. She's. She's listened to this show 40 times. 40 hours. How many episodes we've done. So she has a real idea of what she didn't know. Was it he looks. [00:28:20] Speaker C: She did say. [00:28:21] Speaker A: Right. [00:28:21] Speaker C: This is not what I thought you would look like. Which I thought was funny because when I met her, you know how you build that in your head, what somebody on a podcast might look like or, you know, somebody that you hear through somebody else might look like? Yeah, she was exactly. She was exactly what I thought she would look like. I could have picked her out of a lineup before I met her. [00:28:37] Speaker A: Really? [00:28:38] Speaker C: Yep. [00:28:38] Speaker A: What does that mean? [00:28:39] Speaker C: It means I just. I had a picture in my head and it was. [00:28:42] Speaker A: But that's different. That's. That's. That's by associate association of me. She's heard your voice? She never heard her voice. [00:28:49] Speaker C: Right, true. [00:28:50] Speaker A: Like, your voice conjures a different picture than. [00:28:55] Speaker C: Did she say what that picture is, good or bad? [00:28:56] Speaker A: No, she didn't say. [00:28:57] Speaker C: Like, I thought she would. [00:28:58] Speaker A: You would look like. She just kept saying, it's not how I pictured him looking, you know? Yeah. [00:29:04] Speaker C: Yeah, she mentioned that. [00:29:05] Speaker B: You remember when lockdown was on and everyone was masked? [00:29:08] Speaker C: Yes. [00:29:09] Speaker B: It freaked me out when people started appearing with no masks. And then nose. We have. We have someone who works the door here. And then. Not like that piece of their face doesn't look. That didn't look remotely like it's gonna. So it was like. Yeah, yeah. [00:29:28] Speaker A: So you interviewed them with the mask and never saw their face? [00:29:30] Speaker B: I never saw the maskless for a whole year, you know, working here and doing the door. And then one time, they turn up with no mask on, and it's like that I'd filled in what this whole piece of face looked like. [00:29:43] Speaker A: It wasn't. [00:29:44] Speaker B: You know, the nose, the mouth, everything. It was completely different. And it absolutely was freaking me out. [00:29:49] Speaker C: I had kind of the opposite experience with some of the people I worked with at a bar back then. People that I thought were not attractive when they put the mask on. All of a sudden I was like, oh, not too bad. [00:30:00] Speaker B: Wait, hide. Hoff. [00:30:01] Speaker A: You thought they weren't attracted. [00:30:03] Speaker C: I thought they weren't attracted. To put the mask on. All they have to have is nice eyes. [00:30:06] Speaker A: Yeah, it's like one of those Egyptian belly dancers. They have the mask. [00:30:16] Speaker B: Yeah, I had one as well. There used to be this young Lass. That's an acceptable word. Who came into the garage where I worked and she rode a motorcycle, which, you know, obviously smoking hot. Right. [00:30:28] Speaker A: That makes a woman hotter in your eyes. [00:30:30] Speaker B: Yeah. And she. She had a full face helmet on. Or every time she would come in, you know, and I'm like, oh, my God. This woman with. Go. You know, nice eyes, and she rides a motorcycle. Yeah. And then when she actually took the. The helmet off, I was hugely disappointed. Not so much like, oh, you know, [00:30:53] Speaker A: you just had to. [00:30:54] Speaker B: It was just. Yeah. [00:30:55] Speaker A: Crazy. [00:30:56] Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah. It was just like. Yeah. It was just not the expectation. [00:31:01] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:31:02] Speaker B: Not even like, oh, you know, not that good looking. Blah, blah, blah. Because let's be honest, my male model career hasn't taken off. But. But it was just different based on. Jesus Christ. We gotta. Hey, does that include the lead? [00:31:16] Speaker C: That includes a lead in. [00:31:17] Speaker A: All right. [00:31:18] Speaker B: That's okay. [00:31:19] Speaker C: The leading was like, 13 minutes. [00:31:21] Speaker B: Okay. So we gotta get going. Yeah. [00:31:22] Speaker A: So whenever you hear Marco. Jesus Christ say Jesus Christ. [00:31:28] Speaker B: Yeah. We can start in earnest. [00:31:30] Speaker C: We just about to start talking about it. [00:31:32] Speaker A: Dude, we gotta. We gotta pop in. Yeah. You guys popping in the studio. Awesome. [00:31:38] Speaker B: Wow. Two guests in less than, what, five days, right? [00:31:42] Speaker A: I know. This is what I've wanted for so long. You've been doing this for a year. You won't let anyone else come in here. I've been begging to have you in here. [00:31:48] Speaker D: About. About 40 minutes ago, Christian was like, do you want to come and say something about this special? And I was like, I'll let him talk about the breakfast for a while and then I'll come back in. [00:31:57] Speaker A: Yeah, because you're an avid and you're a smart guy. [00:31:59] Speaker C: Because I said, come in in like, 20 minutes. And you were like, no, that 40 minutes. [00:32:02] Speaker D: That means 40 minutes was planned. That's three breakfasts. That's a lot of opening. [00:32:07] Speaker A: We didn't even get to the breakfast today. Yeah, we're not going to talk about what. It's late in the day. We're not going to talk about what it. Maybe we talk about what you're going to have for dinner. [00:32:15] Speaker B: This is like your Howard Stern dream, isn't it? Yeah, people drop in. [00:32:19] Speaker D: I have to ride a sibian before I leave. [00:32:22] Speaker A: Oh, I don't think we have any of that. [00:32:25] Speaker B: That's a weird. Howard Stern's like a cult leader to me. He is. The people who follow him are just like, yeah, I listen to Howard eight hours a day. [00:32:34] Speaker D: It made sense in maybe 2000, but, like, now it's like, yeah, you have A problem. [00:32:38] Speaker C: We should say. Who. Who just joined us. We never did that. Oh, it's Mr. Kyle Scanlon, everybody. [00:32:42] Speaker A: Give it up for Kyle Scanlon, one of our. [00:32:45] Speaker B: So that means the only two people that listen to this have now visited. Yeah, the podcast studio. [00:32:51] Speaker A: There's a few more, but we'll get them in here due time. [00:32:54] Speaker C: One at a time. [00:32:55] Speaker A: In due time. [00:32:56] Speaker B: We could fit everyone who listens to it. So folks standing by. [00:33:00] Speaker A: Yeah, we could fit them all in here. [00:33:01] Speaker D: We're gonna do a live show in here. [00:33:02] Speaker A: Yeah, it'd be nice. Yeah, for the listeners. Like a. Like an XRT listener special. [00:33:06] Speaker B: But then who would listen to it? Because they all. [00:33:08] Speaker A: Yeah, well, they'd go home and listen to it later. It's not live. [00:33:10] Speaker D: It's the same listens. Yeah, they want to hear themselves. [00:33:13] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:33:13] Speaker A: So it came to my attention last week, Kyle, that you are sort of like the Cyrano de Bergerac of this program. [00:33:22] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:33:23] Speaker A: Meaning you've been. You know what I mean by that? [00:33:26] Speaker C: Oh, yeah, right. He's my favorite hockey player from the 80s. [00:33:31] Speaker A: You know what I'm talking about? [00:33:32] Speaker B: The bloke with a huge nose. [00:33:34] Speaker A: Yeah, well, yeah. [00:33:35] Speaker B: The Steve Martin film. [00:33:36] Speaker A: Yeah. Meaning you've been. Or the wizard of Oz is maybe a better analogy here. You've been feeding him and him. [00:33:47] Speaker D: Apparently I get all the air about stuff. [00:33:49] Speaker A: Yeah. All the recommendations for the people we've been listening to all this time. I had no idea until last week that their picks, most of them anyway, seem to be your picks. [00:33:59] Speaker D: Well, I want to. I want to hear about the ones I want to hear about. It's selfish. And I'm one of the few comedians that still likes comedy, so. [00:34:06] Speaker B: And you're one of the two people that listen to it, so we might as well. [00:34:10] Speaker A: I think we'll give you a permanent seat at the table here. And so who have you picked that, you know, you've gotten in their ear? And we've been. [00:34:21] Speaker D: Well, you said Rory. [00:34:22] Speaker A: You did. Rory was you. Okay. [00:34:25] Speaker D: That's one of my favorites. [00:34:26] Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah. [00:34:27] Speaker A: That was you via him. Yeah. [00:34:28] Speaker D: Rory's is like one of my favorite. [00:34:30] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:34:31] Speaker D: He's so funny. [00:34:32] Speaker A: Yeah, I like. [00:34:32] Speaker D: I like. I like comedians. I think this is a good one for the same reason. And I. I would have picked Patrice, too, because it's one of my favorite specials. I like comedians that do stuff I can't do, so I wanna. That's why I watch weird stuff or mean stuff, whichever one falls in. [00:34:48] Speaker A: Who do you like? Who else do you like? Right now, new. That's out. [00:34:51] Speaker D: I. I was happy to. That you guys all like Shane Gillis. I was excited about that. I do like Shane. [00:34:57] Speaker A: Did you get in his ear about him? [00:34:59] Speaker D: No, that was all you guys. No, yeah, I. I was. I'd be too afraid he wouldn't like it. Actually, that's something you like. He gave it three dogs or whatever. [00:35:09] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:35:09] Speaker A: Three GameStop bags. [00:35:11] Speaker D: Oh, yeah, we switched to bags on that. [00:35:13] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:35:14] Speaker B: Wait, I liked him the most. [00:35:15] Speaker A: No, you ate the least. We gave it three points. [00:35:18] Speaker B: Okay, [00:35:20] Speaker A: well, let me say this. I'm super glad that you picked this one. A couple reasons I don't know that I ever saw this one as old as it is. 20 years. [00:35:30] Speaker B: 20 years. [00:35:30] Speaker A: Yeah. It's amazing to think this was 20 years ago, but it brings me back to 2001. You know where I'm going with this comedy festival. [00:35:41] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:35:42] Speaker A: When I had the [00:35:46] Speaker D: audacity. [00:35:47] Speaker A: Audacity? [00:35:48] Speaker C: No. [00:35:48] Speaker A: I had the privilege of being in a show sandwiched in a show with Zach Alifanakis was the headliner and I was sandwiched between him and Fred Armisen. [00:36:02] Speaker B: I was gonna say. Yeah. It would be almost double that. Yeah. [00:36:04] Speaker A: Yeah. At the Bible School for the Chicago Comedy Festival in 2001. [00:36:09] Speaker D: And how'd you do? Do you remember? [00:36:12] Speaker B: Well, what did you do? [00:36:14] Speaker D: I think that answers the question. [00:36:15] Speaker A: Yeah. You see where their career. [00:36:17] Speaker B: Yes, yes, yes. [00:36:19] Speaker A: And I'm a substitute teacher for 30 years there. [00:36:22] Speaker B: So what did you do in that show? [00:36:26] Speaker A: Well, there are three of them. It was a three nighter. Right. I did. I don't remember. [00:36:32] Speaker B: Not underpants. Karate Kid. Please tell me. [00:36:35] Speaker A: No, no, I did it. [00:36:36] Speaker C: I know. [00:36:36] Speaker A: I did a Charles Bronson. I did a set as Charles Bronson trying stand up comedy. [00:36:41] Speaker B: Right. [00:36:41] Speaker D: So he's supposed to get out of jail now. [00:36:43] Speaker A: Did you see that? He's in jail. He's alive. [00:36:46] Speaker D: Yeah, he's still alive. [00:36:47] Speaker A: Charles Bronson, isn't he? [00:36:48] Speaker D: Is the guy that they made that movie about. [00:36:50] Speaker B: No, he's talking about the real Charles Bronson. Not the London. The guy. The English guy called himself that. He's talking about actual Charles, the actor Charles Great Escape. [00:37:00] Speaker A: He's dead. [00:37:01] Speaker B: Yeah, he's long dead. He's dead, but he's. Kyle's talking about Bronson. You know, the Tom Hardy movie. There's this. There's this psychopath in England who called himself Charles Bronson. [00:37:14] Speaker A: He's like vigilante, like his. [00:37:17] Speaker B: No, no, no, he's not a vigilante. He's just an absolute psychopath. Yeah. And Tom Hardy did the film about it. [00:37:23] Speaker A: Oh, that sounds cool. It's a good movie. [00:37:25] Speaker D: I don't remember. It was like 15 years ago. [00:37:28] Speaker B: I always remember saying to Becky Garcia, you must have loved that movie because you got to see Tom Hardy's dick finally. And she goes, no, it was very disappointing because it wasn't as. In one scene, he strips himself naked, greases himself up because he knows the guards are going to come in and fight him. So, like, the guards all pile in, but they can't get a hold of being greasy. That's smart out of him. [00:37:53] Speaker A: But you saw this film. [00:37:54] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:37:55] Speaker A: And you saw his penis. [00:37:56] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:37:57] Speaker D: How many dogs. [00:38:00] Speaker B: I know. [00:38:01] Speaker D: How would you describe how many inches? [00:38:02] Speaker A: Do you. [00:38:02] Speaker B: If I had a. A latent homosexual tendency, it would be. It would be Tom Hardy. [00:38:10] Speaker A: Well, he checks all the boxes. [00:38:12] Speaker B: He checks all the boxes. So I'm always f. Off of that. [00:38:16] Speaker A: When you sit. [00:38:17] Speaker B: I'm always on the. I'm always on the back foot watching a Tom Hardy movie. I'm like, is this. Am I converting? Right now he has. Am I a butterfly emerging? [00:38:28] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:38:29] Speaker B: And him. [00:38:30] Speaker D: After all these years, I'm learning something new. [00:38:32] Speaker B: Him and him and Peaky Blinders. I could watch that. [00:38:35] Speaker A: Murphy, you got a. [00:38:37] Speaker B: No, no, but the. But Tom Hardy's character in. Oh, for ages I had the impression. I had it dead on. You know Tom Hardy's character. [00:38:49] Speaker D: Give it a crack right now. [00:38:50] Speaker B: Peaky blind. I can't do it anymore. [00:38:53] Speaker A: What an impression of him. [00:38:55] Speaker B: Yeah, you got. [00:38:55] Speaker A: You do an impression of Tom Hardy in Peaky Blinders. Do it. [00:38:59] Speaker B: He's the. No, I can't anymore. I had it down and then they killed the character. [00:39:05] Speaker A: Yeah, I saw that movie. We gotta move on. But I saw Warrior. What a movie that is with Tom Hardy. You ever see that movie? He fights. He's like an MMA fighter. You ever seen. [00:39:14] Speaker C: I haven't seen it. [00:39:15] Speaker B: That's great. [00:39:16] Speaker A: All right, well, yeah, I learned that too. I didn't know he was homosexual until. [00:39:19] Speaker D: Yeah, it's nice to know. [00:39:22] Speaker A: Late and homosexual. [00:39:24] Speaker D: I think that's what he said. [00:39:26] Speaker A: So anyway, yeah, I did a time. I did a Charles Bronson. I thought it went well. Do you remember? [00:39:31] Speaker B: No. I didn't get to see the shows because I'm. That whole festival. I'm whirring around like a lunatic. [00:39:37] Speaker D: Yeah, well, I'm glad you've stopped doing that. [00:39:39] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:39:41] Speaker D: Thank God you've taken a deep breath and relaxed. [00:39:43] Speaker B: As I was down in the basement at 7am this morning, literally shoveling human. Yes. [00:39:50] Speaker A: Oh, the toilet exploded. [00:39:51] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:39:52] Speaker D: It feels like You've gotten. [00:39:53] Speaker A: Oh, my God. [00:39:54] Speaker D: Demoted. [00:39:55] Speaker A: You call a plumber for that? I didn't call a plumber for that. [00:39:58] Speaker B: Yeah, we did, but I had to shovel the. Out of the way. [00:40:01] Speaker A: Oh, my God. [00:40:02] Speaker D: And I. And I'm not gonna. [00:40:04] Speaker A: Did you help? [00:40:05] Speaker D: No, those are. I got here at 10, and I was like, how's it going? Is the God. You knew what he was dealing with. [00:40:12] Speaker B: Anyway, talking of shoveling, how was your act? [00:40:15] Speaker A: It doesn't matter, Max. [00:40:16] Speaker D: But there we go. [00:40:18] Speaker A: In 2001, Armisen nor or Galifianakis were. What? They weren't that big. They were on their way, but they were. [00:40:25] Speaker B: They were the box. They were. They were the talk of the town. [00:40:28] Speaker A: Yeah. Along with me. Yeah. [00:40:30] Speaker B: Y. [00:40:32] Speaker A: But I remember after one of the shows, like, trying to chat him up a little bit, he didn't want to talk to me. Right. Like, he was just like. Like maybe he saw my act and was like, this guy sucks. [00:40:42] Speaker C: Yeah, maybe. [00:40:43] Speaker A: And then from that point on, I hated him. Right. [00:40:47] Speaker B: Zach Galifianakis did hit on Tom Lawler's sister, though. [00:40:51] Speaker C: Really? [00:40:52] Speaker B: San Francisco. [00:40:55] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:40:55] Speaker B: Hot gossip. [00:40:56] Speaker A: Okay, you heard it here first. [00:40:59] Speaker D: We gotta bring Tom in the next one. [00:41:00] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah, we'll get the Q and A on that. So I always hated him because he. I felt like he gave me the brush off. [00:41:08] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:41:09] Speaker A: You know, but, man. So I never really watched his act. I always hated him. Avoided the hangover, all that. [00:41:17] Speaker B: I hated the fact that he never did the lodge, and that really, to this day, irks me. [00:41:22] Speaker A: Did you, you know, dangle something out there for him? [00:41:27] Speaker B: By the time the lodge was hitting its stride, he was already big. But he came into town and he did the People under the Stair, which was a showcase put together by the people that run Drag City Records. And they would get a lot of good people because they ran a record label and were cool when they had [00:41:48] Speaker A: comedy people on that label, too. Hamburger. [00:41:50] Speaker B: Yeah, hamburgers on there. But they. They. This. This showcase they used to run was like a who's who. And as you can imagine, it drove me insane that, like, they weren't. These people would do a room of 50 people because it was some call record label and not the link. That's what. [00:42:10] Speaker A: That's what you're going for here, right? That kind of cachet. It's so cool. It doesn't matter how few people are [00:42:16] Speaker B: in the room, maybe. Yeah, I know. My mind is evolved. [00:42:22] Speaker D: We're doing a little bit of that, I think. [00:42:23] Speaker B: To be fair, I don't think we're ever gonna Be cool. [00:42:26] Speaker A: But no, as long as you're leading the charge. So I don't know. [00:42:34] Speaker D: Now that he's gay, we can get along. [00:42:36] Speaker A: Yeah. Maybe it'll change now. [00:42:38] Speaker D: He hasn't in now. [00:42:39] Speaker A: You should have an all male review here, you know, one night, like one of the stages have, you know, like a Chippendales type of thing. [00:42:45] Speaker B: She watched Notorious. There's two Tom Hardys in Notorious. He plays the Cray twins. [00:42:52] Speaker A: Oh, geez. I'm not familiar. [00:42:53] Speaker D: Heather's like, sit down on the couch, relax. Pouring ice water on himself. [00:43:02] Speaker A: So 2001, he's not big, but by 2006, when. How big is Zach Alphenak Is live at the Purple Onion, the show that we watched. [00:43:10] Speaker D: So it would have been like the time period where him, Brian Posayn and Patton Oswald, comedians of comedy. Like that tour was going on. Because that was like, what, 04 or something like that. [00:43:20] Speaker B: Maria Bamford and Maria Bamford. Yeah. [00:43:23] Speaker D: Forgot my favorite comedian out of this four. [00:43:26] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:43:27] Speaker B: Yeah. So they would have been huge at that point, right? [00:43:29] Speaker D: They were pretty big. [00:43:30] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:43:30] Speaker D: But comedy wasn't as big as, like. It's not like now. It's not like they're like selling out the United center or anything. [00:43:36] Speaker A: Yeah, Well, I mean, it made me think, like, I haven't seen Zach Galfenakis popping up much. [00:43:42] Speaker D: I don't think he does lately any. [00:43:44] Speaker B: He lives on a. North Carolina. Yeah, he lives on a farm in North Carolina and does nothing. I mean, if you look at his IMDb, he's probably making millions still. And it's all voicing cartoons. [00:43:57] Speaker A: Yeah. It's just. He's just stepped out. [00:43:59] Speaker B: Yeah. Why? [00:44:01] Speaker D: I don't think he likes being a celebrity that much. [00:44:03] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:44:04] Speaker A: Yeah. Well, did you see where he performed last night? [00:44:08] Speaker C: No way. [00:44:09] Speaker A: Or. I don't know if you'd call it a performance, but in looking. Looking him up today, him and David Letterman. An Evening with David Letterman. And Zach Alphenak is at the Just for Laughs. That's going on this week. I guess. Yeah, I don't. [00:44:24] Speaker C: February. [00:44:26] Speaker B: No one's going to Montreal in February. Yeah, absolutely. Bollocks. Freeze. [00:44:30] Speaker D: Because they haven't even done the auditions. [00:44:32] Speaker B: I mean, might just be part of it now because JFL is virtually a shadow in it. It can't be jfl unless it's their jfl. [00:44:41] Speaker A: It was under that banner, but maybe. [00:44:43] Speaker D: So what, what did you think? So, given this context, what do you think of the special? [00:44:47] Speaker A: Well, we'll get. We don't like to show our cards [00:44:50] Speaker B: yeah, we like to do an hour, [00:44:52] Speaker C: say what we think of. [00:44:54] Speaker A: Yeah, we don't. Yeah, we don't. We like to avoid that until the very end. We like to dance around it. [00:45:00] Speaker B: Why don't you? [00:45:01] Speaker A: What did you think? [00:45:02] Speaker D: Well, I haven't watched it in a while. I love it. It's one of my favorites. I like it because it came out in a time period where stand up comedy was. The specials were very boring and everything kind of had like the premium blend Comedy Central presents background that was just like, maybe their name or like. And like corn. If they're like, from a place like where I'm from or, like, you know, just southern Illinois or if they're from a city, like, maybe it's like if in New York, maybe it's like buildings in the background or something. It's just very boring. And I like that he does it at, like, a small venue and that. I. I don't know. I. I just feel like for the last 20 years, I've just watched people kind of do a version of him on stage a lot. [00:45:41] Speaker A: What do you think? Do you think he looks like Christian does it? When you watch him, do you see Christian? [00:45:45] Speaker C: I see. [00:45:47] Speaker A: No. [00:45:48] Speaker D: No, you don't see. [00:45:49] Speaker B: I mean, if you think he's playing keyboard, then, yeah. [00:45:52] Speaker D: If I close my eyes and Christian has longer hair and a beard and different color hair and a different shaped [00:45:59] Speaker A: body, then yes, I. Yeah, he reminds me. [00:46:03] Speaker D: Changed everything about him. I think you. [00:46:04] Speaker C: Do you think he looks like Bill? [00:46:06] Speaker D: Kind of, yeah. [00:46:10] Speaker A: Now here it is. Look, just for laughs. Vancouver, February 12th to the 22nd, 2026. Last night, evening with Vancouver. [00:46:18] Speaker B: So it's the tour thing. [00:46:19] Speaker A: Okay. I don't know. What do I know? I didn't mean. [00:46:21] Speaker D: Yeah, this is why. [00:46:22] Speaker B: Anyway, talk to you. Bill looks like Peter Stormare. Not. [00:46:25] Speaker D: Oh, I kind of thought Dana Carvey. [00:46:27] Speaker C: Yeah, that's what I said in the beginning. I said he look like a church lady. [00:46:30] Speaker A: I get a little no wy from the pit. Yeah. Okay, so I. I had not seen this. Had you guys seen this special? I know he has, but did you watch. Have you watched it recently, Kyle? [00:46:43] Speaker D: No, I've seen it a ton of times. [00:46:45] Speaker A: Okay, well, I've turned it on a five this morning. I got up. [00:46:49] Speaker D: That's when comedy should be consumed. [00:46:51] Speaker B: Well, I thought you were laying off of that shit, trying to do it properly. [00:46:55] Speaker A: Listen, I didn't get home till late from the boy and then I did no time. I knew I was coming in hot here today. So I did five this morning and then I watched the last 10 minutes at work before I came here. I don't ever break it up like that. But you know what? Like, it was kind of nice to get two different, you know, vibes off it from when you first wake up with the coffee in the morning. House silent, 5am and then midday. I enjoyed it much more in midday, you know. [00:47:24] Speaker D: Yeah, that makes sense. [00:47:25] Speaker A: Yeah. Yeah. [00:47:26] Speaker D: I don't enjoy anything in the morning like that. [00:47:28] Speaker A: Well, but I did. But I did enjoy it in the morning. I just enjoyed it a little differently. Yeah. Give it a try. Give. Give early. I might. You know, my dream was always to have a comedy show or an open mic in a coffee shop in the morning. Yeah. Yeah, I think that would be great. Like, somebody's coming in, like, fail. [00:47:47] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:47:48] Speaker A: Somebody doing crap. [00:47:49] Speaker D: I think you would get a coffee thrown at your head. [00:47:52] Speaker B: Yeah. It's just denial. It's just denial. It's like, how can I set up for failure? [00:47:58] Speaker A: I think it'd be fun. It gives people something, you know, to start their day. No. Well, there's probably a reason why it's never been done, but I. At first, you know, he comes out or whatever, and then it's like, it cuts to like, is this a movie? I was like. And then I had to stop and be like, am I watching the right one? Because it looks like this is like some kind of movie or mockumentary. [00:48:19] Speaker C: Kind of like the Dangerfield thing that we reviewed. Yeah, a little bit. [00:48:22] Speaker B: Like, with the PBS guy. Interviewing. [00:48:25] Speaker A: Who is that guy? That guy's familiar. [00:48:27] Speaker C: Npr. [00:48:28] Speaker B: Npr, yeah. [00:48:29] Speaker A: Is he a real NPR guy? [00:48:30] Speaker C: Yeah, his face was familiar, but I guess I wouldn't know what his face looks like if I listened to him on npr. [00:48:34] Speaker A: Yeah. No, I recognize him from somewhere else. [00:48:36] Speaker B: Yeah, he's an NPR guy. [00:48:38] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:48:39] Speaker B: This. [00:48:39] Speaker A: Does Zach Alfianakis with a mustache look more like him? [00:48:44] Speaker C: What is this? What is. [00:48:45] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:48:46] Speaker C: What's going on? [00:48:46] Speaker B: Well, so that's obviously that. That character I bought up, Baskets to you, right? [00:48:53] Speaker C: Yes. [00:48:53] Speaker B: So Baskets is awesome. And that's clearly where they got the idea for it. [00:48:58] Speaker C: That's what I saw that in my research. [00:49:00] Speaker D: This is the show he did on HBO with. [00:49:06] Speaker B: Yeah. Louie Anderson was so good as a woman. I can't even think of Louis Anderson as a woman. Yeah. [00:49:13] Speaker C: Oh, I've seen an episode or two of this. I know what you're talking about now. [00:49:16] Speaker B: Yeah. Louis Anderson was so good as a woman, I couldn't think of Louis Anderson as male anymore. And then Martha Kelly, who is an old fave comedian, of mine, you know, she. She always has a broken arm. The whole. The whole series and stuff. But Chip, you know, the. The twins, Chip, and I can't remember what his name was in baskets. It. Clearly, this is the genesis of, like, hey, we can run with this. [00:49:42] Speaker D: Yeah. I kind of wonder if it was, like, him being like, hey, I can do, like, a little bit of acting, like, be a weird actor if you want me to be. Like, a side. [00:49:49] Speaker A: This special was kind of like. [00:49:50] Speaker D: Like a little bit of showcasing that he. [00:49:52] Speaker B: Zach Galifianakis, turns up in this weird submarine. Like, serious movie, huh? I was on holiday in Kentucky once, and I thought I was so fucking bored, because in Kentucky, I start watching this movie, and all of a sudden [00:50:09] Speaker A: it's a dramatic role. [00:50:09] Speaker B: It's just like a dramatic thing. I think it's like, it's either a submarine or a ship. And, like, you know, was it Down [00:50:16] Speaker A: Periscope with Kelsey Grammer? [00:50:18] Speaker B: It's a serious movie, and he suddenly crops up in it. [00:50:23] Speaker A: What? [00:50:23] Speaker B: That's that Galifianakis? It is. I MDP it. Right. [00:50:27] Speaker A: Sad character in a movie. [00:50:28] Speaker C: I found out today that he was in the movie into the Wild, which I watched a hundred times when it came out. [00:50:34] Speaker A: What is. Who is he in that movie? [00:50:35] Speaker C: He is. Oh, what's the local guy? What's the guy from Wedding crashes and stuff? I can blank it on his name, Zach Alfenakis. He's. He's the friend of the guy that hires Christopher McCandless, or however you say his name. [00:50:50] Speaker A: McCandless. [00:50:52] Speaker D: Pretty close. Now that's pretty close to Christian's name. [00:50:55] Speaker C: Maybe not. [00:50:56] Speaker B: Looks. [00:50:58] Speaker D: The name is pretty close. [00:51:01] Speaker C: He's his friend. He's the one that. He gets slapped by the woman in the bar. He's the one that gets mad at the table when. Oh, God damn. What's his name? He's a Chicago guy. He's a big. Yes, he's Vince Vaughn. [00:51:14] Speaker A: Oh, I don't remember him. [00:51:17] Speaker C: He was the boss. He owned, like, the. The cops. Radom. [00:51:20] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:51:20] Speaker C: Yeah. He was his friend in the movie. [00:51:22] Speaker A: His acquaintance Mark's hooked up something. [00:51:24] Speaker C: Kevin is his name. His character's name. [00:51:26] Speaker A: He's gonna read what's on his phone. Okay. [00:51:27] Speaker B: The Ship movie starring Zach Galifianakis is below 2002, a supernatural horror film set on a World War II submarine with Kristen Stewart the lead, alongside a cast that includes Bruce Greenwood and Olivia Williams. [00:51:45] Speaker A: Who's the director. I just heard about this movie recently. It's a famous director. [00:51:53] Speaker B: Anyway, I'll catch you up. All Right, here we go. Is that California is weird. Wally is the name of his character. [00:52:02] Speaker A: He's like a. Like when your mother is looking up something on the floor. [00:52:05] Speaker B: Well, one of the writers is Darren Aronofsky, but the director is David Tuohy. [00:52:12] Speaker A: No, I don't know. I never heard of that movie. [00:52:14] Speaker D: Never heard of it. [00:52:15] Speaker B: That's where that looks like. Wong. Yeah, neither. I just turn it on and like, hey, what's that? [00:52:20] Speaker A: Oh, I was thinking of a movie with TJ Millers and in some below movies. He in that TJ Miller? No, he's in the one with Kristen Stewart. Okay. I want to talk about great piano comedians a little later in the show. Right, but who does. Who. I always do this a lot on the show. [00:52:39] Speaker C: Who. [00:52:40] Speaker A: Who is a comp for Zach Alpha. [00:52:42] Speaker C: Next. [00:52:43] Speaker A: What other comedian is at all similar? [00:52:46] Speaker B: Greg Mills. [00:52:48] Speaker A: I got him on my list for great piano comedians, but yeah, Tim Minchin. Okay, don't go through all the. Forget piano comedians. [00:52:58] Speaker C: Reggie Watts. [00:52:59] Speaker A: No, stop. [00:53:00] Speaker B: You just said, who are the famous piano comedians? And then immediately said, forget piano comedians. [00:53:06] Speaker A: What other comedian that's not a piano comedian? [00:53:10] Speaker D: They kind of. [00:53:11] Speaker A: Well, it reminds you of his jokes. [00:53:13] Speaker B: No. [00:53:13] Speaker D: I guess. [00:53:14] Speaker B: Well, you talk about his one liners. [00:53:16] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:53:17] Speaker B: I mean, yeah, it's Hedberg and all those. [00:53:19] Speaker C: Dimitri Martin. [00:53:22] Speaker A: And I think the other reason I didn't like him, besides the fact that he snubbed. He snubbed me at that thing. [00:53:29] Speaker D: I'm so glad you haven't held onto this for 25 years. [00:53:32] Speaker A: It's healthy. Is I feel like those kind of one liner type of comedians. Right. They're not one liners, but whatever they are, I feel like that's cheating. You know, it's too easy. Those, you know, those. What would you call them? Witticisms, puns? [00:53:50] Speaker D: I would just say no, his are straight up jokes. They're not puns. I do agree with you about puns. I don't enjoy puns. [00:53:58] Speaker A: They are like puns, kind of. [00:54:00] Speaker D: The first joke, I think, in the special is my name, Zach Galifianakis. I hope I'm saying that right. Yeah, that's a great joke. [00:54:07] Speaker A: Clever. Yeah, it's clever. [00:54:09] Speaker B: It's a good joke. [00:54:11] Speaker A: Yeah, it is. [00:54:11] Speaker D: The problem with comedy, I think, is when you break it down, it. It always kind of you go, oh, really? That happened? That's really good. [00:54:19] Speaker A: There's no artifice. Right. He's. He's just, you know, doing these witticisms. Is that the right word? 1. He's not like a Henny Young jokes I don't. They're not jokes. [00:54:31] Speaker C: You. [00:54:31] Speaker A: You always correct me when I say, you know, yeah, that was a great joke. It's not a joke. [00:54:36] Speaker C: An anecdote. [00:54:36] Speaker A: It's an anecdote. Right, right. [00:54:39] Speaker B: So he's not doing jokes. [00:54:41] Speaker A: They are, they're just. They're. [00:54:44] Speaker B: Well, he gets turned up phrases. He gets. He obviously, as the. As the special snowballs, he starts to get more expansive bits. Right. Whoa. So he does the crowd work bit. [00:54:57] Speaker D: He does with the Netflix guy too. That's so funny. I forgot about that. [00:55:01] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:55:02] Speaker C: Is that really a Netflix guy? [00:55:03] Speaker D: Yeah, it's the bar guy, Carl guy that he's talking to or whatever. He's like, what do you do? And then he was like, I work for Netflix. [00:55:11] Speaker C: I thought he just said to him, what do you have stocking Netflix or something? And that's why you're here. I thought he was making a joke. No, that guy, he actually does work for Netflix. [00:55:18] Speaker D: That's. [00:55:20] Speaker C: That's pretty good. [00:55:22] Speaker A: I mean, I know it is now about 2006. [00:55:25] Speaker B: Yeah, it was. Yeah. Says Netflix in the thing. [00:55:27] Speaker A: Well, one of the producers was Ted Sarando, so he's Netflix. [00:55:31] Speaker D: So that must have been one of the first things they did. [00:55:33] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. [00:55:35] Speaker D: But I bet you. [00:55:36] Speaker B: And that's when they were. Mate, you had to mail the out. Right. [00:55:39] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:55:39] Speaker A: He's kept referencing the dvd. [00:55:41] Speaker C: Yeah, he did say the dvd there was a stream. Yeah. [00:55:45] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:55:46] Speaker D: I also think it's important to remember how not fun comedy was at this time because it's like David Cross and Patton Oswald just getting mad at George Bush. [00:55:55] Speaker C: Yeah, that's right. [00:55:56] Speaker B: It was just. [00:55:58] Speaker D: I don't know if you're like 19. You're like, that sucks. I don't want to hear this. Yeah, boring. [00:56:04] Speaker A: And so you're saying that with. [00:56:06] Speaker D: It's fun to do silly jokes. [00:56:08] Speaker A: He was silly. Yeah. He's doing silly jokes. [00:56:12] Speaker D: I went to an all gay school. [00:56:13] Speaker B: That one. Yeah. [00:56:16] Speaker A: I was the only straight guy at an all gay school. [00:56:18] Speaker D: What you doing over there, Zach? [00:56:19] Speaker B: Eating. [00:56:21] Speaker A: It's pretty funny, Jesse. They're all good. I just don't like them because I didn't think about. No, here's why. [00:56:30] Speaker D: Because I didn't think of them. [00:56:32] Speaker A: Because he. He couldn't just go up and say those. He needs the piano bullshit. No offense, Christian. [00:56:41] Speaker B: Oh, so coming out. [00:56:43] Speaker C: I don't get offended every time somebody mentions a piano. [00:56:48] Speaker A: Could he do those jokes without the piano? Can he even play piano? [00:56:53] Speaker C: Well, yeah, I think so. I was pretty impressed when he had his. His head in his left arm next to his beer. And he was. He was playing with his right hand. It sounded like he was. He was doing well enough that it sounded like he could be using two hands. He was using the one hand. He knew what he was doing. [00:57:07] Speaker A: But he doesn't really do much with the piano. [00:57:10] Speaker C: But what he's doing is not easy. No, no, no. [00:57:14] Speaker A: Do you think he could. These jokes would work the same if he didn't have the piano. [00:57:19] Speaker B: But that's not the point, is it, the piano? The point is everything coming together. The intimate venue, the freewheeling nature, the cuts to sketches. It all comes. [00:57:31] Speaker D: I like that. It's not even like the, like, super serious beginning. Like, it's like him chugging beers. And then they're like, you gotta go. [00:57:38] Speaker A: You're up. [00:57:39] Speaker D: And then he's like, oh, shit. All right. And then he runs across the street and goes, oh, yeah. [00:57:43] Speaker B: I think he wins. He must have bought a director. He bought a real director. To the table. Not just, okay, we're gonna put up a backdrop. We're gonna put two cameras. One. And we'll just spin through this like we always do. It's like, no, we're gonna have them. We're gonna have a VW camper, and we're gonna get it st. We're going to do this. Well, whether that was this, but, I mean. And then the. The brother thing was the best bit of the entire special to me. [00:58:11] Speaker D: I'm glad you liked it, because I was worried that that might throw some [00:58:15] Speaker B: people off because I love baskets. Baskets is genius. [00:58:19] Speaker A: Yeah. Okay, well, we don't. None of us saw baskets. [00:58:23] Speaker D: I. I have. I've seen one season of it, and I liked it. [00:58:26] Speaker B: It's on Hulu now. [00:58:27] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:58:28] Speaker B: No, Very weird. [00:58:30] Speaker A: Here's what I'm driving at, though, with this other thing. The piano for a comedian is a crutch. The same way fucking cares about. It's like any prop comic, the piano. Talk amongst yourselves. [00:58:46] Speaker C: I don't think. I think you're right, Bill, about one thing. I think that the jokes wouldn't have landed the same with the piano, But I also think Mark's right that it. But the piano is there. It is part of the act. So you can't really dissect them when they are integrated and related to each other and. And hold each other up. [00:59:02] Speaker B: Yeah. It's like saying if Dimitri Martin didn't have a flip chart and shit on it, then he'd just be a bloke standing there. [00:59:09] Speaker C: Right? [00:59:09] Speaker B: Yeah, but he isn't Right. [00:59:10] Speaker C: Yeah, right. He did do it. [00:59:12] Speaker D: So I think the worst thing is people that do that after that and then they're like, I'm doing this. [00:59:17] Speaker C: I remember when Zach Galifianakis came out and I saw what he did. I saw he was a piano player telling jokes, and I thought, that's brilliant. I can never do that now. Nobody can ever. Because you're just going to be Zach Galifianakis. [00:59:29] Speaker D: Like a similar thing on guitar. [00:59:30] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:59:31] Speaker D: He's like Nate Bargetti Bonham. Yeah. [00:59:35] Speaker C: Yeah. Once one person does it very well, that's. That's the person that does it. [00:59:39] Speaker D: But they all did it a little different. You know what I mean? [00:59:41] Speaker A: So. [00:59:41] Speaker C: Oh, yeah. [00:59:42] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:59:42] Speaker C: Each is. Yeah, they. They have their own style. [00:59:44] Speaker D: And I. Yeah, I think it's worked out good for all of them. [00:59:47] Speaker C: Yeah. And for us. [00:59:50] Speaker A: Well, I think then maybe it's just. I would have loved to have played. [00:59:53] Speaker C: Did you draw the camper on your notes? [00:59:55] Speaker A: I've been doing. I've been like. I've been drawing more in my notes. [01:00:01] Speaker C: Is that a beer, too? [01:00:02] Speaker A: These are the testicles. When you talked about Bell and Sebastian. Yeah, testicle. There's Carl. [01:00:11] Speaker B: I love the Bell and Sebastian. Talk about dating, the thing. A Bell and Sebastian reference. [01:00:17] Speaker C: I didn't get that. Who's Bell and Sebastian? [01:00:21] Speaker B: You don't know? The band. [01:00:22] Speaker C: The band. Oh, that rings the bell now. Yeah, but I don't. I don't think I ever listen. [01:00:25] Speaker D: Rings of Sebastian for me. [01:00:30] Speaker A: Did you see what else I have going down the middle of the sheet? [01:00:33] Speaker C: Yeah, I see the. The drinks that you've drawn. [01:00:35] Speaker A: The. [01:00:35] Speaker C: The beer. [01:00:36] Speaker A: Keeping track of all the drinks that he had. [01:00:38] Speaker C: He had a glass of wine at one point. [01:00:39] Speaker A: He had a glass of wine at one point. I mean, I don't know if it looked like he had, you know, four or five drinks during the thing. I'm not judging about that. No, no, I'm not judging that. But you don't usually see that really go after them. [01:00:52] Speaker C: He was drinking dark beers, too. Yeah, those weren't. Those weren't really light. Yeah, those were. Those were heavy, high octane beers. I respect that. [01:01:00] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah, yeah. [01:01:02] Speaker C: It's not easy to do. [01:01:05] Speaker A: Okay, well. [01:01:07] Speaker B: And he did a talk about dating in the fugees bit that finally cracked the interviewer up. [01:01:12] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:01:13] Speaker B: How he bonded over the fugitive Fuji song. [01:01:16] Speaker A: The Fuji. Yeah. That was good. [01:01:20] Speaker B: Damn. [01:01:20] Speaker D: I'm gonna go home and watch this now, I think. [01:01:23] Speaker B: Is it your DVD that's in the basement? Someone bought a dvd. [01:01:26] Speaker A: The actual dvd. [01:01:27] Speaker D: Oh, maybe I Had I have it. I don't know if mine's down. [01:01:30] Speaker C: Did you get it from Netflix? Just didn't return it. [01:01:33] Speaker D: Wish that would have been a good move. I do have some blockbuster DVDs. [01:01:39] Speaker C: Really? [01:01:39] Speaker D: Yeah. None of them are good. Yeah. [01:01:44] Speaker A: What did you think of his crowd work? [01:01:48] Speaker C: Who are you asking? Anybody in general? [01:01:52] Speaker A: I don't know. I didn't. [01:01:53] Speaker C: I didn't really have it didn't stand out one way or another. To me, it was pretty standard. [01:01:57] Speaker A: What about. He really went after the bald guy. [01:01:59] Speaker C: He really did go after. [01:01:59] Speaker A: You think he knew who he was? If he was with Netflix, wouldn't he know who? [01:02:02] Speaker D: I think he just picked on the one guy that looked different than everybody in the room. [01:02:06] Speaker B: I mean, it was a good observation. Like everyone else in here is my. Definitely my crowd. Who the hell are you? [01:02:13] Speaker C: And his body language, too. The guy wouldn't break. He wouldn't. He wouldn't move once he was in his, you know, his stance. [01:02:19] Speaker A: Yeah, he. I thought the guy held it pretty well. He did. [01:02:21] Speaker D: The guy was great. [01:02:22] Speaker A: And I like how it was shot. You got a lot of different angles. Sometimes you could see the cameraman in the mirror. [01:02:28] Speaker C: You know, I like that. [01:02:29] Speaker A: But like, you'd get him from the side telling the joke and then you. You'd really get in focus. Somebody in the audience and you get their reactions to it. Whereas most specials that we watch, they'll. They might show a side view and you can see some of the people in the first row, but they usually. It's really usually just head on for the community. You don't. And they'll cut to the crowd laughing, which I always think is. [01:02:49] Speaker D: It's one of my biggest pet peeves. I hate crowd reactions. [01:02:52] Speaker A: And I think they're canned. I don't even think they're real. I think they're just spliced in to make it look like the other. Not say the audience isn't laughing. It's just. I think that's like. [01:03:00] Speaker C: Right. [01:03:01] Speaker B: The infamous Mike Wiley laughing at himself on tv. On what? One time, Comcast, of all people, approached the Lincoln Lodge and said, we want to make shows with local comedians and we're going to put them on this thing called Comcast. [01:03:17] Speaker A: Local cable access. [01:03:19] Speaker B: Yes, A step above cable access. So I was like, oh, no, this ain't going to work. Like we won't be able to get an audience and blah, blah, blah. And in the end, I consented to do it. This is at the old Pancake house. So I said to the performers, here's the deal. You've all got to get. You've got to get two people each. There's gonna be 12 on the show. We need at least 20 people in the audience. Into the audience. Yeah. Of course, being the performers, they all just turned up with nothing more than a shitty grin and no audience. So then we had to put. Comedians are. So then we. Then we put the comedians in the audience and then some clever computer cast editor did an edit of the guy on stage and then cut into him in the crowd. No laughing. Laughing at himself. And I was like, you? Yeah, you smart ass little. [01:04:13] Speaker D: Have you guys ever seen the one I like? Like that. Have you ever seen Chelsea Peretti's special? It's pretty good. [01:04:20] Speaker B: Oh, I guess we'll be watching it. Yeah. [01:04:23] Speaker A: Whenever these guys have a recommendation. [01:04:25] Speaker D: It's probably like 10 years old. And it cuts to the crowd, like for a crowd reaction. It's just like a dog in the. In the audience. It's pretty. [01:04:33] Speaker A: That's pretty great. [01:04:34] Speaker D: Yeah, it's pretty good. [01:04:35] Speaker A: That's amazing. [01:04:35] Speaker B: But yeah, And I said to Comcast, this is terrible. This is terrible. And they were like, no, the more terrible it is, the more we want you to do it. So they just kind of. I fucking phased out of it in the end. I said, I'm not dealing with this. I gave it to Jeb Cadwell. I was like, you. If you want to carry on doing it, you carry on doing it. Well, they're all on Comcast. They were all on On Demand cable. [01:04:59] Speaker A: Not anymore. [01:05:00] Speaker B: I don't know, Maybe. [01:05:02] Speaker A: Why are you doing his act? [01:05:03] Speaker B: It's every, literally every local comedian. Because they would just see that. Because I was like, we're running out of comedians. And they're like, we'll just grab open micas. And I'm like, that's gonna be terrible. [01:05:14] Speaker A: We gotta watch that. [01:05:15] Speaker B: Yeah, you. It was it you on the phone. I was talking to her the whole time. [01:05:19] Speaker A: What? [01:05:20] Speaker B: The more terrible it is, the better it is, essentially was the nihilist Comcast. Yeah. I'll tell you what I did notice in this special is how worried the children in the choir looked. [01:05:31] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:05:31] Speaker B: Did you look at their facial expressions? They were like. [01:05:35] Speaker A: Well, it was weird. Like the way they should. You never saw them. They never pulled the camera back so you could see them in the room with everybody right at the end. [01:05:43] Speaker B: They did. Because I was like. There was a shot because I was like, where the hell were they? And then you could see when they stage left. [01:05:50] Speaker A: Yeah, they looked like they didn't know why they were there. [01:05:53] Speaker D: I'm sure they did. [01:05:54] Speaker C: Oh, yeah. [01:05:54] Speaker B: The look on their faces was like, oh, when can we leave, guys? [01:05:58] Speaker C: I'm gonna have to go. I gotta go put the beer away. Somebody else gonna have to bang the gong at the end. Kyle, I like you to tap your finger against the gong here and set it off. And we're all done. And then I'll text Kyle my rating of Zach Galifianakis so you can chime in on that. [01:06:13] Speaker A: Okay. That'll be fun. [01:06:14] Speaker B: Okay. Tell you what, you could turn that goddamn heater off as well. [01:06:18] Speaker D: Have the heater. [01:06:18] Speaker A: No, that's great. [01:06:19] Speaker B: No, it's. I'm sweating bullets. Yeah. [01:06:22] Speaker D: No, I came in here and it was immediately sweaty. [01:06:25] Speaker A: Yeah, I like it like this. [01:06:27] Speaker D: Yeah, yeah, it says 86. What, are you running a show in the blue room? [01:06:34] Speaker B: Yeah, Yeah. I was gonna say it's like. Oh, it's like a real Lincoln log show. [01:06:39] Speaker A: We would take our tops off in [01:06:40] Speaker B: here, [01:06:42] Speaker A: see where you're hiding. Motorcycle sweatshirt. All right. All right. Well, that's weird. He's gone now. [01:06:48] Speaker B: I know. It's like. It seems odd. [01:06:52] Speaker A: It's like being separated from my. [01:06:55] Speaker B: For Those listening, Christian McCann just left the room, and it's. And it's a. Paul has settled. [01:07:01] Speaker A: Yeah. It's awkward. [01:07:03] Speaker D: Small breeze from the door whenever he opened it, too. [01:07:05] Speaker A: There was. It was nice. [01:07:06] Speaker D: Kind of a nice little breeze. [01:07:08] Speaker A: All right. You're going to fill in admirably for him. Okay. All right. [01:07:12] Speaker C: All right. [01:07:12] Speaker A: I don't know. We're almost done anyway, right? [01:07:15] Speaker B: You don't know how to do the gong. [01:07:16] Speaker A: I know how to do the gong. No. [01:07:18] Speaker B: I'll do it, though. [01:07:18] Speaker A: Are you going to go over there? [01:07:19] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:07:20] Speaker A: You're going to sit there? [01:07:20] Speaker B: Yep. [01:07:21] Speaker A: Okay. [01:07:21] Speaker B: Play some music while I move. [01:07:24] Speaker A: All right. So although I criticize the. The ease of which those oneliner bits he does and doing them with the piano, I feel like it is a tinge of jealousy there. I wish I could play the piano. I always wish I could. One time at the Second City, I did try to play the piano. After Mills, I think I did Billy Joel's We Didn't Start the Fire. And for the entirety of it, I just. I just mashed the keys and. And. And said whatever words I could remember, [01:07:54] Speaker B: you know, from the song classic 90s O'. Donnell. [01:07:57] Speaker A: Yeah. Because I wanted to do music, but I didn't. I don't know how to play anything. [01:08:01] Speaker D: No, I don't know how to play anything either. I. I am kind of jealous of people that do that. [01:08:06] Speaker A: So you see, like. [01:08:07] Speaker D: But not so much that I would let it get in the way of enjoying comedy. [01:08:11] Speaker C: Right. [01:08:12] Speaker A: Well, you're a better man than me. But like, you see like Sandler doing a lot of guitar work. Who would you say? [01:08:18] Speaker D: Who else do you say was Nick Thune, Bo Burnham, should we say, [01:08:25] Speaker A: and piano, but you don't see other instruments. That's what I'm thinking. There's a, there's. There's a niche there for like a [01:08:32] Speaker B: comedian on a violin Amazon doing drumming. [01:08:36] Speaker A: Yeah. Fernando or whatever, he does that character. [01:08:39] Speaker D: I don't think I've ever watched that. [01:08:40] Speaker A: Is it good? [01:08:42] Speaker B: Apparently it is. I don't know. He had a lot to rock stars in the audience to do it, I think. [01:08:48] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah, get ready for that next. There'll be comedians. [01:08:54] Speaker B: There's a couple of violinists. I know there are. There was violin comedians. There was a female violin comedian. What was her name? [01:09:01] Speaker D: Ah, the one that just did the. That we had on Lodge. Well, she wasn't a comedian. She was just a variety actor. [01:09:07] Speaker B: Yeah, no, no, I'm talking about an actual touring comedian. [01:09:10] Speaker A: And so they play like a little piece and then do a joke and then play a little piece. Yeah, yeah. It's kind of like what he does. Right. But with a different instrument. All right. What was. You probably won't remember it, but if you can remember, you can also put yours in. I always like to ask, what was your favorite joke? Did you already say yours, Mark? [01:09:30] Speaker B: I like the, the. The brother. [01:09:32] Speaker A: You like the brother? Just. Just that part of it. My favorite part was with the brother when he goes, can you blur out or do a silhouette of my head and give me the monster voice? I couldn't stop laughing. That was hilarious, right? [01:09:48] Speaker D: Yeah, I do like it whenever he's like breaking, like, he'll be in the middle of something, he's like, I'm not gonna scream to the microphone. He goes like, like, just like screaming like. I do really enjoy that. But the. [01:10:00] Speaker B: The. The. [01:10:01] Speaker D: I went to an all gay school is probably. [01:10:02] Speaker A: That was your favorite joke? Yeah. What was your favorite joke then, Mark? Like, of all his many one liners and I've written them all down, so if you need a. [01:10:11] Speaker B: It kind of came thick and fast. I haven't really. You know, I just put. I just put. Opened with a bunch of one liners. Good, good. [01:10:23] Speaker A: Yeah. Mine was the. When he combines NAACP with Mad Mothers against the Advanced Colored People. That was. [01:10:32] Speaker D: Yeah, that's a really good joke. [01:10:34] Speaker A: That was amazing. Okay, well, I think we're getting to it. Yeah. And then I want to do. I want to go through the list of great piano comics. You've mentioned them all already. Pretty much. [01:10:46] Speaker B: But I've got. [01:10:47] Speaker D: Stole your thunder. [01:10:48] Speaker A: Yeah, you did. You did. All right. Does he have any other specials? [01:10:53] Speaker D: No. [01:10:54] Speaker A: This is the only comedy special he [01:10:56] Speaker B: ever put out, potentially. [01:10:58] Speaker C: Are there. [01:10:59] Speaker A: Okay. [01:11:02] Speaker B: I think he might be part. Was he even part of the. The comedians of comedy thing? [01:11:09] Speaker A: Was he part of that universe? [01:11:10] Speaker D: Yeah, I think so. [01:11:11] Speaker B: Was he part of the actual performance film or whatever? [01:11:15] Speaker D: I believe so, but I haven't seen that in so long. I remember I watched it a bunch when it first came out, and then I'm. I want to say yes, though. Pose the one that doesn't make any sense to me in that group. [01:11:27] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:11:28] Speaker D: I. I don't understand his comedy, but. [01:11:31] Speaker A: Yeah. I've never liked it or. Really? Yeah. [01:11:33] Speaker D: I don't even, like. I don't even go. I get why someone would like that. [01:11:38] Speaker A: Yeah. It's very droll. [01:11:40] Speaker D: Yeah. [01:11:40] Speaker A: Is it not? It's a droll type of. [01:11:42] Speaker D: Just, like, heavy. I'm heavy metal and I like. [01:11:46] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:11:46] Speaker D: You know, I'm a nerd. [01:11:48] Speaker B: All right. Oh, God. Nerd comedy. I'm glad that me too died. [01:11:52] Speaker A: Who's a nerd comic? Who would you characterize? [01:11:54] Speaker D: Everyone in 2011. [01:11:56] Speaker B: Yeah. Just. It just became this rush to be like, I'm a nerd. I'm a nerd. [01:12:00] Speaker A: It makes me want to like Joe Pera, kind of. [01:12:03] Speaker D: No. Joe Pair is like, more. There's substance behind it. It's not just like. This is, like, straight up. Just like. I'm talking about video games. [01:12:13] Speaker B: Yeah. I like video games in fantasy and [01:12:17] Speaker D: comic books and, like. And it's just talking about that, and you go, I don't, though. I don't like that stuff. So this isn't for me. [01:12:24] Speaker A: These comedians are. They're gone now. They've. [01:12:25] Speaker B: No. [01:12:26] Speaker D: Some of them are movie stars. [01:12:27] Speaker B: Yeah. Some of them just adapted to the [01:12:30] Speaker D: next, and some of them got canceled. [01:12:32] Speaker A: Oh, yeah. [01:12:34] Speaker B: It was just like this epidemic of I'm gonna talk about nerd. [01:12:39] Speaker D: It was really not a. Not a fun time. I don't. [01:12:41] Speaker A: I'm glad I missed that. [01:12:43] Speaker D: When did you stop doing comedy? [01:12:46] Speaker A: Well, I haven't. I'm still very active. [01:12:48] Speaker B: I can tell. [01:12:49] Speaker A: You want to book me? I'm available. [01:12:51] Speaker D: I think I'm gonna look through the year, but. [01:12:53] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:12:53] Speaker A: Bill, you're booked. Nothing for me. [01:12:56] Speaker D: Okay. [01:12:57] Speaker B: Bill has featured with Fred Armisen and Zach Galifianakis. [01:13:02] Speaker A: I have. Yeah. We put that in my resume. Yeah, I was thinking about it. I think I'm gonna. I'm not looking for any handouts. I'm not looking for any showcases, really. I'm gonna start anew and I'm gonna just go right back to. To open mics and start grinding from the bottom up. Just like I never did comedy before. Just start again. [01:13:26] Speaker C: I mean, that's kind of. [01:13:27] Speaker A: It's gonna be rough. There are a lot of 50 year old guys out there. [01:13:30] Speaker B: There's a ton of them. [01:13:31] Speaker A: Are there a ton of grinding away? [01:13:33] Speaker D: So many. It's the most popular thing for 50 year olds to get into. [01:13:37] Speaker A: I thought about either that or renting a room here and having an over 50 comedy special. [01:13:44] Speaker B: Terrible showcase. Yeah. Well, C.J. sullivan does them all. Right. [01:13:49] Speaker A: Yeah, he will. He'll come in and do it. 50 over 50, though. It's gonna be called over 50. Like the magazine. Like the dirty magazine. All right, we need a rating scale. Kyle, since you're our guest. [01:14:01] Speaker C: Okay. [01:14:02] Speaker A: What's a good rating scale for this? Before we give our ratings, [01:14:08] Speaker D: should we do beards this time? [01:14:10] Speaker A: Beards. We could do beards. [01:14:12] Speaker D: Yeah, yeah. [01:14:13] Speaker A: How many beards? [01:14:13] Speaker D: Or we could do drinks. Since he did drinks. [01:14:15] Speaker A: We could do drinks. [01:14:17] Speaker B: What do you do? Two? [01:14:19] Speaker A: Yeah, let's do pussies. Because he talks about like, imagine they're 88, 18. Yeah, we'll do a. You can go as many as you want. And it doesn't have to be on a five point scale. [01:14:34] Speaker D: It doesn't have to be. [01:14:35] Speaker A: No, you can go above and beyond on. [01:14:38] Speaker D: Okay, I'm going all the pussies. I love this. [01:14:40] Speaker A: You're giving them infinite pussy. [01:14:41] Speaker D: Yeah, whatever. The highest mark is. I. Because I don't go. I don't think a special has to be perfect to be the, like the best score. [01:14:50] Speaker A: All right, so give. So you're giving it your highest rating. [01:14:53] Speaker D: I love the special. [01:14:54] Speaker A: You love it? [01:14:54] Speaker D: Yeah. It's probably a top five special for me all time. [01:14:58] Speaker C: Yeah. [01:14:58] Speaker A: Yeah. And just get a little more. Why? This is so, so amazing. [01:15:05] Speaker D: I just think he's so funny and he didn't like, continue to keep going. I feel like there's a lot of times where sometimes people come out with their second special and you go, that is a lot of stories about you being in the airport and meeting other semi famous people. [01:15:19] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:15:20] Speaker D: And you go, this isn't very good. [01:15:22] Speaker A: Yeah, like of another artist or musician. He did the one special, it was gold and he left it right there. That's admirable. [01:15:30] Speaker D: I think there's Something really cool about that. [01:15:32] Speaker A: He could have done 50 specials. [01:15:34] Speaker D: I'm sure he could. Five times what he made off of that. Or more if he wanted to. Right now. [01:15:38] Speaker A: If he wanted to do it. Yeah. [01:15:40] Speaker D: And he could say nothing and he couldn't even. It wouldn't even have to be funny. [01:15:42] Speaker C: Yeah. [01:15:43] Speaker A: Yeah. You could just churn him out and he doesn't. [01:15:45] Speaker B: He. [01:15:45] Speaker A: You know, when you make the Sistine Chapel or whatever, you leave it at that. [01:15:50] Speaker B: He's growing tobacco in North Carolina on the farm. Yeah. [01:15:54] Speaker A: How many would you give this, Mark? Kyle gave it an infinite. [01:15:58] Speaker B: I'm gonna give it four out of five. [01:16:02] Speaker A: Four out of five. What's the knock? You're not giving it all. The. [01:16:08] Speaker B: The knock is just in sheer volume of laugh. I just didn't. It's not up there with a. [01:16:15] Speaker A: You weren't laughing and laughing and laughing. [01:16:17] Speaker B: Yeah. It just. It didn't hit like a five. [01:16:20] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:16:21] Speaker B: That's all. [01:16:22] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:16:23] Speaker B: It's not from a floor. Yeah. [01:16:25] Speaker A: Okay. The flaw is not the right word. [01:16:26] Speaker B: Push it. [01:16:27] Speaker A: Who have you given five to? [01:16:29] Speaker B: Well, we've given fives to, like, Stuart Lee. We've given fives. I think I give a five to Maria Bamford. You have a five to Bargazzi. I think you did. Really? Yeah. That was the first. [01:16:43] Speaker D: That's, like, kind of surprising to me. [01:16:45] Speaker B: Yeah, it might be because it was the first one. Maybe if I start backtracking, I'll be like, oh, you know, that was just the novel. [01:16:52] Speaker D: That's going to be the guy that everyone copies off of. [01:16:54] Speaker A: Of next. Yeah. [01:16:55] Speaker D: It's gonna be a lot of. Prepare yourself for so many low energy. It's gonna be impossible to find a host for our show. [01:17:04] Speaker B: Mark, how many? So I don't know. I'm trying to. I'm looking at Christian's notes. [01:17:09] Speaker D: Oh, Christian texted me and he said. He said out of four, he gave it 3.5 whatevers. Out of whatever. [01:17:17] Speaker A: Out of four, 3.5. [01:17:19] Speaker D: And then we decided whatevers are. [01:17:21] Speaker C: Did he. [01:17:21] Speaker A: Did he expound on that at all or. [01:17:23] Speaker D: No, he did not. [01:17:23] Speaker A: He did not. Okay. [01:17:25] Speaker B: There's no real clue in his notes. [01:17:28] Speaker A: Okay. Yeah, Yeah. I like that he has notes, though. I'd like to take a look at those. I'd like to peruse those notes. Okay, I'll give mine. I'm going to go out on a limb here without hyperbole. This was the greatest standup special I've ever seen in my life. Yes. Now, I will qualify it in a [01:17:55] Speaker D: way and say it's barely A stand up special. [01:17:57] Speaker A: Yeah. I don't know what this is. Yeah, it is a fucking shambolic mess. Is that a word? Ramshackle mess. He's falling down on stage. It's a stew. It's. I don't know, but I barely stand up. [01:18:10] Speaker D: But I love it. [01:18:11] Speaker A: It is so entertaining. It is just so entertaining from beginning to end. And although I, you know, I think, you know, maybe he's crutching with the piano or in the one liners. Whatever. I don't even care. Those one liners are great. They're. They're amazing. Written his crowd work, I thought it was great. He was, he was aggressive with that guy. [01:18:31] Speaker C: He was. [01:18:34] Speaker A: He was high energy, low energy. I love the whole character of, like, him, like, sweating and pulling his hair and playing the whole thing. I don't know what it is, but from beginning to end, this is an amazing special. It's amazing. I honestly think it's the best special we've seen. I wouldn't call him my favorite comedian. [01:18:52] Speaker D: No, no, I wouldn't either. But I do love this special. [01:18:56] Speaker B: So the million dollar question is, is he then forgiven or is he still Persona non grata? [01:19:04] Speaker A: No, I don't forgive him. [01:19:07] Speaker B: So you're not. [01:19:07] Speaker A: Listen, we're on the same bill together. I'm trying to, you know, connect with you. [01:19:11] Speaker B: He's not separating the art. Exactly. [01:19:15] Speaker A: No, I am separating. Separating the art. [01:19:17] Speaker B: Oh, yeah, you are. Yeah. Yeah. [01:19:18] Speaker A: But still be. Yeah. I'm not forgiving that because, you know. [01:19:23] Speaker B: Okay, so, Zach, if you're out there, you're still unforgiven. [01:19:26] Speaker D: Yeah. [01:19:26] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:19:26] Speaker B: Still got some hard yards. [01:19:28] Speaker A: To be fair, Fred Armisen didn't give me the time of day either. I. That I believe him and his pant. Whoever he was with. Remember he had that. That guy, he was doing that dual act. He had a. A guy with him. [01:19:39] Speaker B: Oh, I remember the picture. I don't recall the other guy. [01:19:42] Speaker A: There was another guy with him, [01:19:45] Speaker C: so. [01:19:45] Speaker A: Yeah. All right, great. Greatest piano comedians of all time, go. [01:19:49] Speaker D: Oh, I don't know that I have a bunch with this. [01:19:51] Speaker A: Go. [01:19:51] Speaker C: Go. [01:19:52] Speaker B: What? [01:19:53] Speaker A: Greatest piano comedians of all time, go. [01:19:54] Speaker B: Les Dawson. [01:19:55] Speaker A: Never heard of him. [01:19:56] Speaker B: Go. I'm just gonna keep doing English ones. [01:19:59] Speaker D: Yeah, he's gonna do a bunch that. I don't know any of these people. [01:20:02] Speaker B: American ones, because I'm Greg Mills. [01:20:06] Speaker A: Go. How about Craig Robinson? [01:20:08] Speaker B: Oh, yeah, Craig. [01:20:09] Speaker A: He does a great piano keyboard act. Yeah, he's great. [01:20:13] Speaker B: We talked about him at the Red lion open mike. [01:20:15] Speaker A: Yeah, he used to do Red Line. Yeah. Can we get him in here. You know him? Does he know you? [01:20:22] Speaker B: He might be. Vaguely remember. Yeah. I mean, that's. We took him 25 years ago. Blah, blah, blah. [01:20:30] Speaker A: Reggie Watts. Victor Borga. [01:20:34] Speaker B: Great. [01:20:34] Speaker A: Victor Borga. [01:20:35] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:20:36] Speaker D: Are we just. Are we doing. Would Reggie Watts be piano or would he be. Whatever that is? Like a synthesize. [01:20:41] Speaker A: What is it? Keyboard. Keyboard. [01:20:42] Speaker D: That's not a synthesizer. It's a loop pedal. That's what it's called. [01:20:45] Speaker A: Okay. It counts. [01:20:46] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:20:47] Speaker C: Okay. [01:20:48] Speaker D: Throw Bone Burnham in there. Throw Nick Thune in there, too, because he plays guitar. [01:20:51] Speaker A: I gotta check him out. [01:20:53] Speaker D: Nick Thune did the Lincoln Lodge a million years ago. [01:20:57] Speaker B: That did. That's an open wound. We'll deal with that. Yeah, he was very nice to me. [01:21:04] Speaker D: I smoked cigarettes with him all week. It was pretty fun. [01:21:08] Speaker A: And there's one comedian nobody's mentioned today, and it's hurt me because he's one of the greatest influences on me and my comedy. And he is our comedian that we will review next week because it's my pick. [01:21:25] Speaker B: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. [01:21:26] Speaker A: There it is. The piano. None other than the legend of upstate New York, Dr. Dirty. John Valby's, but pointed to Hell. Yeah. [01:21:45] Speaker B: What's the special called? [01:21:47] Speaker A: I don't even want to say it because it's the name of the special. [01:21:51] Speaker B: I'll just. [01:21:52] Speaker D: Is it the same as a Richard Pryor album? [01:21:55] Speaker A: No. [01:21:57] Speaker B: Well, how am I gonna know what to watch if you refuse to get. [01:22:01] Speaker A: It was really hard to find a full length. He doesn't have a special. But I was able to find something on YouTube. It's coming soon on a face near you. That's the name of the special and it's 45 minutes long. And it. You are going to want to die. [01:22:20] Speaker B: Mark, Should I watch it with Heather? [01:22:22] Speaker A: It is. [01:22:23] Speaker B: I don't know. [01:22:24] Speaker A: It is filthy. It is filthy. [01:22:27] Speaker D: You don't really like filthy. [01:22:29] Speaker A: No. That's why he's gonna die. [01:22:30] Speaker D: Yeah. [01:22:30] Speaker A: It's going. Yeah. Watch it with Heather. I want to. I want to hear all about it. Dr. Dirty next week. And Christian's gonna love it because he loves Valby. He's been at Valby's house. [01:22:41] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:22:42] Speaker A: Yeah. You watch it, too. [01:22:44] Speaker B: Underage beers at Val B's. Wasn't he. Yeah. [01:22:47] Speaker A: Drinking underage beers of. Beers of Valby. All right, you ready? You got your hand ready over there? This has been the longest we broke. We're breaking records every week. This is a two hour show. Take us out, Takashi. I think you hit the wrong one. Hit that lower one. [01:23:00] Speaker B: No, that's the right one there. [01:23:03] Speaker D: That's good base to it. [01:23:05] Speaker B: It's nice. [01:23:06] Speaker A: All right. [01:23:07] Speaker B: Okay. [01:23:07] Speaker A: Thank you to our special guest, Kyle Scanlon. [01:23:09] Speaker B: I don't know how to turn this off, so I'll have to get Christian. [01:23:12] Speaker A: You're gonna hear all our side chatter. [01:23:15] Speaker B: Don't. Don't say anything contentious until Christian comes in.