Review: Perfect, Nikki Glaser

[00:00:08] Speaker A: Okay. And welcome to another episode of Mark. Erie is mad tonight. Today we'll cover lost keys, limp microphones, and. [00:00:25] Speaker B: MF is ripping me off left and right. Yeah. [00:00:28] Speaker A: Yes, yes. Okay. Yeah. We're not bringing. Oh, you want to do viz? I'm gonna start. [00:00:34] Speaker B: It might lighten the mood. [00:00:35] Speaker A: That'll lighten the mood. [00:00:37] Speaker C: That'll pull the. The plane back up. [00:00:39] Speaker B: Well, actually, we pull the nose up. We've got three orders of business here. We've got our gimmick. Viz section. [00:00:47] Speaker A: What's that? What do you mean? Where we do the. [00:00:49] Speaker B: Yeah, we've got the. You know, the meat of the matter. The review. [00:00:53] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:00:54] Speaker B: God damn it. No. I've got my wallet. And then. But we've got your. I'm sure you're gonna want to enlighten us to your. Your posh boxing trip to wherever it was. [00:01:08] Speaker A: I haven't posh boxed since we last saw each other. Because as you know. Or maybe you don't, but you should know that I have steam coming out of my knob as we speak. Yeah, nothing but steam. [00:01:23] Speaker B: It wasn't just the train that had steam coming out. [00:01:26] Speaker A: No, it was my knob. [00:01:29] Speaker B: So to. To recap. [00:01:31] Speaker A: Yeah, What? I mean, there's so much I could tell you about this journey west on the Amtrak. [00:01:36] Speaker B: Well, let's decide. So what are we doing? [00:01:39] Speaker C: What are we doing? [00:01:40] Speaker A: First? [00:01:40] Speaker B: We. We do viz train actual review, which. [00:01:44] Speaker C: Yeah, I think in that order. That's viz train. The next actual review. [00:01:48] Speaker A: Sure, sure. [00:01:50] Speaker B: All right. This might segue in. All right, so here's the viz. So hang on. There were some new rules, right? So I say what it is. One of you says the definition, and the other says, agree, disagree, Keep everybody involved. Okay. Alrighty. Cool, cool, cool. All right, so the first one we've got, I'm going to go. [00:02:09] Speaker A: Who's answering this? [00:02:10] Speaker B: Me or Chris? [00:02:13] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:02:14] Speaker B: Gonna go to Christian because he's got back from Europe. Okay. What is Dosseldorf? Dandruff? [00:02:21] Speaker C: Dusseldorf. Dandruff is either cocaine or heroin, if I have to say one. Dusseldorf. And you know what, though? Is it German? Do they have cocaine in Europe? Oh, I'm sure they have it everywhere now, don't they? [00:02:36] Speaker A: Sigmund Freud introduced it to the world. Really? [00:02:39] Speaker C: Because the devil's dandruff, that's cocaine. [00:02:42] Speaker B: Yes, it is. [00:02:43] Speaker C: So Dusseldorf. Is Dusseldorf a fictional figure? And if it's not the devil's dandruff, it's got to be not cocaine by logic. So I know that heroin is a white powder or can be. [00:02:56] Speaker A: Right? [00:02:58] Speaker C: However, I feel like that's not. I can see the way I watched Mark read the definition, and it took longer than just reading the word heroin. [00:03:07] Speaker B: The reason it took long is because my. I didn't bring my glasses with me, and I'm. [00:03:10] Speaker A: Me neither. [00:03:11] Speaker C: Then I'm going with hair. [00:03:12] Speaker A: We need to leave some glasses in here at all times. [00:03:15] Speaker B: Tell me your prescription, and I'll hit the. [00:03:17] Speaker A: I'm a two. I'm a two. [00:03:18] Speaker B: Two. [00:03:19] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:03:20] Speaker C: What. What's the. What's the question? [00:03:21] Speaker A: What's your. Do you need readers glasses in here? We're gonna keep glasses in here. [00:03:26] Speaker C: Oh, did they go by numbers like that? Yeah. [00:03:29] Speaker A: Plus two. One and a half. 1.25. I'm a two. [00:03:33] Speaker C: Are you asking what I would need? [00:03:34] Speaker A: Yes. [00:03:34] Speaker C: Zero. [00:03:35] Speaker A: Gonna go on a run and get some. [00:03:37] Speaker C: Oh, just give me some stylish. No glass in the frame. Just a nice frame. [00:03:42] Speaker B: Jesus. [00:03:42] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:03:43] Speaker B: All right. [00:03:44] Speaker A: You're two as well. [00:03:45] Speaker B: No, I think I'm one. [00:03:47] Speaker A: Jesus. [00:03:47] Speaker B: I've only got some dollar store ones. [00:03:50] Speaker A: Yeah, that's all you need. They're all. Yeah. [00:03:55] Speaker B: I'm trying. I can't stare at either of you when I'm doing it because my. You know, I won't. Poker face it. So I'm just gonna read it. But don't look at me for clues. [00:04:03] Speaker A: I'm gonna. With Christian. I don't think Christian understands the viz because all roads lead to sex and filth in the viz. And so the Dusseldorf dandruff. [00:04:18] Speaker C: But that's where I got in trouble last time. Thinking that it led to sex and then realizing it could be anything. [00:04:23] Speaker A: Or filth covers. [00:04:25] Speaker C: Also, bodily functions like drugs is just as risque as some of the filth they're talking about. Maybe. [00:04:32] Speaker A: But I've not known the viz to operate only in drug parlance. But we'll see. [00:04:37] Speaker C: Makes this game so much fun. [00:04:38] Speaker A: Yeah. No, Dusseldorf dandruff is. Is when a gentleman leaves his mark on a gal's hair patch and it dries. And when it later flakes off, that is known as Dusseldorf's dandruff. [00:04:59] Speaker B: All right. Bill was the closest, but not. Yeah, so I guess you win. It's the itchy, flaky skin condition that occurs after a sampling. Rugatug shops. [00:05:13] Speaker A: So it does not involve a woman. It's posh boxing. [00:05:17] Speaker B: Yeah, Posh box. [00:05:18] Speaker A: The leftovers from posh boxing. [00:05:19] Speaker B: Yes, it is. So you got nearest. [00:05:23] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:05:23] Speaker B: All right, so let's. Oh, so we'll start with you on the next one, then. This is an exclamation. Not a. Not a noun or verb. Perfume is the poetry of love written in the air. When would you say that perfume is. [00:05:40] Speaker A: The poetry of love when written in the air? Well, it has to do with some kind of odor, obviously, but perfume is throwing me, so I'm going to say. Say it one more time. Damn. I'm not confident now. [00:06:00] Speaker B: Perfume is the poetry of love written in the air. When would you exclaim that. [00:06:06] Speaker A: After a passing gas. [00:06:10] Speaker C: That is the. That is the most logical. That's the first thing that came to my mind, too. However, I don't see where the love is in that. [00:06:19] Speaker A: Maybe sarcastic. [00:06:21] Speaker C: So if I disagree, does that mean that I have to come up with my own definition? Like. [00:06:25] Speaker A: No, you just have to disagree that you have to say I'm wrong or I'm right. [00:06:28] Speaker B: Yeah, you say wrong or wrong. [00:06:29] Speaker C: I think you're wrong. [00:06:32] Speaker B: Okay. Something to be said prior to dropping a gut that brings tears to the eye. [00:06:39] Speaker A: So you dropping a gut is. [00:06:40] Speaker C: Yeah, that's not. [00:06:44] Speaker B: Perfume is the poetry of love written in the air. [00:06:47] Speaker A: Yes. Yes. It's sarcastic. [00:06:49] Speaker C: Yes. But it's said beforehand, not to nitpick. [00:06:53] Speaker A: Oh, well, I didn't know that we had to say when it was said, but what was said in reference to. Well, Bill win. [00:07:00] Speaker C: Bill's close enough to 2.0right now. [00:07:02] Speaker B: All righty. We're back to. We're back to. Christian, who is going to tell us what noun, what is a sniper's nightmare? [00:07:14] Speaker C: A sniper's nightmare. So I have to think of the noun that a sniper's nightmare is. [00:07:25] Speaker B: N. It says N next to it. [00:07:28] Speaker C: Okay. A sniper's nightmare. It has to be far away. Sniper's nightmare. Who's the sniper, though? Is it a dirty butthole? [00:07:46] Speaker A: Could be. [00:07:47] Speaker B: Stampeding towards the butthole. Where's all the bloody. What's. It's gone. [00:07:56] Speaker C: Oh, they're right there. [00:07:57] Speaker A: Coasters. There's a stack here. [00:07:59] Speaker B: Oh. Behind the arm on the thing. [00:08:03] Speaker A: Is that your final answer? Butthole. [00:08:05] Speaker C: A dirty. A dirty bone. [00:08:10] Speaker A: So it's camouflaged? [00:08:12] Speaker C: Yes. [00:08:12] Speaker A: You can't find. Find it? [00:08:14] Speaker C: Yep. [00:08:14] Speaker A: I'm gonna disagree. I'm gonna. [00:08:18] Speaker B: Oh, just disagree. You don't want to crack at what it is? No. Okay. A sniper's nightmare is a heavily refreshed individual staggering, swaying, and randomly falling face first into the road. [00:08:32] Speaker A: Yeah, I had a feeling. Had to do with drunkenness. But I was gonna say if I. If I had to answer it, which I didn't, I was gonna say, you know, a drunk trying to go to the bathroom and hit the toilet or something like that. But it wasn't that far off. [00:08:47] Speaker B: You really, really locking in on the viz? [00:08:49] Speaker A: I'm locked in. I'm locked in. I've been locked in my whole life. [00:08:52] Speaker B: Okay, well let's do one more then. Because we did two each. Right. What is spentimentality? [00:09:02] Speaker A: Spentimentality is when after coitus, the man lies there with his bonnie lass. [00:09:13] Speaker B: Or lad. [00:09:14] Speaker A: Or lad. Right. And is sentimental about their relationship having just made coitus. [00:09:24] Speaker C: It was spent a mentality though. Right. So I'm going to say that that's close. However, it is being fatigued and. What's the word? Well, just wanting to sleep. Spent. You are spent. [00:09:41] Speaker B: No, Bill's kick your ass. This, this round again. It's the post coital state psychological vulnerability in which a man will agree to almost anything. A new kitchen, a child, a mother in law coming for Christmas, etc. [00:09:58] Speaker A: How great or how propos that considering what we just watched. [00:10:02] Speaker B: I know I was gonna segue to it and then I realized we gotta go. [00:10:06] Speaker C: Oh, but now we gotta do the train thing. [00:10:08] Speaker A: Yeah, we gotta figure out that now. Right. [00:10:11] Speaker B: Would you do it at the end then? Yeah, I did pick that one. Because I'm like. Because of that. Yeah, I'm like, oh yeah, that's gotta come. [00:10:20] Speaker A: Wow. Yeah. Because Nikki Glazer would say in her special perfect. That it's right before coitus. Coital. That a man will agree to end. [00:10:34] Speaker C: Right before the climax. [00:10:35] Speaker A: Yes, right before the climax. And as I was answering that question, I thought at the end, like I'm usually the opposite afterwards. Like she describes. Right. Like once it's over, it's like, ugh, wish that didn't happen. Like go away. You know, Like I'm not sentimental at all. It's like get me out of here. So I disagree with the viz. But you know, I know where the viz is coming from. [00:11:01] Speaker B: Y. [00:11:02] Speaker A: It's really not fair to have Christian go against me because my long history with the Viz. I've studied the viz and it's lexicon for. [00:11:13] Speaker C: I've got some. I've got homework to do. [00:11:15] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:11:16] Speaker B: You should start hanging around with. Well, this sounds bad. You should start hanging around with 15 year old boys and get back into that groove. [00:11:24] Speaker A: A truly tasteless joke. Yeah. Start reading those Resharpen. [00:11:29] Speaker C: That stone. [00:11:30] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know if that's a stone that. No, I mean sharpened anymore. [00:11:34] Speaker B: But you need to get back into that 15 mentality and then you can, you can lock in on what visits thinking yeah. What's funny is I bet you most of the people who are writing Viz now, they got pushing 60. Yeah. [00:11:51] Speaker A: Bunch of old guys in the room like us, like. [00:11:54] Speaker B: Yeah. I bet you I'm going to look up for next week. I bet you the editor of viz is probably 60 doing this. [00:12:02] Speaker A: What is the staff? How old is the staff, is what I want to know. [00:12:05] Speaker B: Yeah. I don't think they changed the staff that much because the cartoons haven't really changed. [00:12:10] Speaker A: You know, it would be great. Would be get some. Would be to get somebody from the Viz online here, you know, while we do this. [00:12:16] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:12:16] Speaker A: Somehow. [00:12:17] Speaker B: Yeah. I think there is a documentary about Viz. [00:12:20] Speaker A: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Well, I look forward to the Viz every week. And I. And more fun than doing this is in the interim between these, is to send you. Send you texts about things we talked about on the Viz, like Brown Trout and Kaiser Soza. Those come up every day for me. Really? Yeah. Well, Nikki Glaser. [00:12:49] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:12:49] Speaker A: Have we seen her? I mean, I'd seen her Tom Brady Roast, which is all that she seems to be known for, or what she seems to be most known for now. That thing went viral. Crazy, whatever. She became, you know, supremely in demand after that. But what was the date on this special? Perfect. I meant to look it up, but I never did. [00:13:12] Speaker C: 2016. [00:13:13] Speaker A: Wow. So quite a quite a while ago. [00:13:17] Speaker B: I got fooled because the comment at the top of the YouTube clip said 2023. [00:13:23] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:13:23] Speaker B: I think. And I. It's the latest thing then. [00:13:26] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:13:26] Speaker B: And then I think something she said. [00:13:28] Speaker C: Had me go, why is it the gay marriage thing? That's what tipped me off because she was like, you know, I'm. I was dating this guy and, you know, he said he wouldn't get married to me until the gay marriage was legal. And now it's finally legal. And I think, oh, okay. That dates it, you know? [00:13:41] Speaker A: Yes. But you can still tell that joke. [00:13:43] Speaker C: You could still tell that joke, but it would be. [00:13:45] Speaker B: No, she says her age at some point. Wikipedia. And I was like, hang on, this ain't right. [00:13:52] Speaker C: Right. Yeah. Well, she does make a joke that she says she's in her late 20s, so she's 31, you know, but I think she is. Oh, yeah, she's 41. So. Yeah, it's about 10 years ago. [00:14:02] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:14:03] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:14:08] Speaker C: Yes. [00:14:08] Speaker B: This is one of your long. [00:14:09] Speaker A: I just had a stroke. I just had a stroke. [00:14:12] Speaker B: You look like you're like. [00:14:13] Speaker C: Were you just writing perfume in the air? [00:14:16] Speaker A: Yeah, well, it. The pause went for too long and I just Held it, you know, stayed in it for comedians. [00:14:22] Speaker C: What you want for a podcast? [00:14:24] Speaker A: Just complete silence. I don't know. I still don't know what I was gonna say. 41. So she's 41. Yeah, yeah. Now, have you seen her on foot? I know you. You watched football last week, right? You. You couldn't go to the Chris Kattan show because apparently you had to watch the packers with the missus. [00:14:46] Speaker B: Yeah, I had to sit there for three hours and say nothing. [00:14:48] Speaker A: And that's something you have to do every weekend with the Packers. So how does that go? You don't give a toot about the Packers. Right. So you sit there. [00:14:57] Speaker B: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Let's not be saying. Let's not be putting that on public, okay? [00:15:02] Speaker A: You've not heard you say that. I just assume you don't, because what would American football mean to you? Nothing. Right. [00:15:09] Speaker B: I think it's funny, actually. When Channel 4 started in the mid-80s, they would throw any old shit on that they could get. So they had, like, Paul Hogan's Australian program, you know, this year, and they covered. Because obviously ITV and BBC had all the sports wrapped up. The only sports they could put on the channel were American ones that hadn't got a contract. So I started watching American football probably 83, 84. And just. It's just out of interest because I was fascinated by all things American. And so there used to be American football program on every Sunday night, I want to say. And they recapped, like, the previous show, the full games. [00:15:58] Speaker A: It just showed highlights. [00:16:00] Speaker B: They would show like maybe half an hour of one game condensed, and then these two guys would, like, talk about it. One American, one English, and then they'd show, like, highlights. And so me and the other sort of tragic people at school that would, like getting into it had to pick a team kind of randomly, you know what I mean? Like, well, we know shit about these teams or where they're from or whatever. And I think one of the first couple of three games they showed were the packers coming from behind with, like, really exciting games. So I was like, okay, I'll support Green Bay packers then. That seems a reasonable course. [00:16:42] Speaker A: Wow, how prescient. Right? [00:16:44] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:16:46] Speaker A: Thank you. To align yourself with this team and then later to move to America so many years later and find a lass who is a mega fan of the Packers. [00:16:58] Speaker B: I've still got a thing I sent off. I liked Green Bay packers and I like Denver Broncos. And so I sent off just a random letter across the ocean saying, these teams, hey, you know, I'm in England. I like American football. Could you send me like some stickers or some shit? You know, just, you know. And the Green Bay packers sent me like this big envelope full of like stickers. [00:17:25] Speaker A: Wow. [00:17:26] Speaker B: You know, like swag poster and all this other stuff. [00:17:29] Speaker A: That's awesome. [00:17:30] Speaker B: I think all I got from the Denver Broncos was one sticker, but they sent something. [00:17:35] Speaker A: Wow. [00:17:35] Speaker B: But the packers send me like a thing, you know, autographs on and all this other. [00:17:39] Speaker C: Because they're, they're owned by the people. So they give back more. [00:17:42] Speaker A: Yeah. So. [00:17:43] Speaker B: But I mean, just to send it, you know what I mean? Yeah. [00:17:45] Speaker C: Like I did that when I was a kid. I sent a letter to every NHL team and a few weeks later, all of a sudden packages letters started showing up. Some teams would send me like the packers did a lot more. Some teams nothing. But I'd say probably out of every, every letter I sent, probably only three teams might have not replied. But all of a sudden these, these packages just started rolling in and I had stickers, I had all sorts of memorabilia and yeah, I was thrilled. 13 year old me was very happy. [00:18:14] Speaker A: Do you think teams would do this now? If you sent them a letter now in the mail with the same request, they would send you something back? [00:18:21] Speaker B: I would think. I mean, it's kind of a no brainer, right? It's branding and stuff. [00:18:26] Speaker C: Yeah. My cousin works for the Florida Panthers and he said that they just, they get tons of letters like that and they get to them as fast as they can. But I mean, they're so backed up, especially now because they've won a couple of cups. But yeah, there is a department that, that is their job. Yep. [00:18:40] Speaker A: To respond to stuff. Oh, wow. Well, anyway, I don't know how we, we got here, but Nikki Glaser, after the Tom Brady roast, started doing something similar to what you described in that English show with the highlights and the two people talking where at the end, end of the game on Sunday night. Right. They have Sunday Night Football. She would come on after the game with the, the panel and she would do kind of like a David Spade Hollywood minute type of thing and just, you know, eviscerate like all the different players and games and like the highlights from the, from the weekend and all the games and was it good? Terrible. It was, yeah, it was. Just did not play in that, like because she's trying to be edgy, but she can only go so far. [00:19:24] Speaker B: I was gonna say with the NFL. [00:19:26] Speaker A: Yeah. So like she had to pull the reins on it and it was just there Was no laughter. Right. So it was. Everything was. Just came out kind of flat sounding. It was. I don't think they brought that. [00:19:36] Speaker C: Was it. Was it similar to Dennis Miller doing that sort of deal back in the. [00:19:39] Speaker A: Day when Dennis Miller did. He was a. You know, he was on Monday Night Football as a commentator. So she's not on the broadcast, meaning she's not there during the game. It's after the games are over, after they've talked about the games. Right. As kind of a final thing for the night, they bring her out, sit her at the desk, and she does a, you know, like a fake news type of thing about the NFL. [00:20:00] Speaker B: That's. I've always felt. I know I've probably bored you with this one before. Like, they never did a fat. England had a big show called Fantasy Football League. And what they did is the concept was real simple. They got a bunch of, like, D list celebrities that are desperate to just be on telly, and they had them pick their fantasy football team. [00:20:22] Speaker A: We're talking about American football. [00:20:23] Speaker B: No, no. Yeah. So they had them pick their fancy football team. [00:20:28] Speaker A: And. [00:20:28] Speaker B: And then the show each week was just these two comedians, Bedeel and Skinner, and they would kind of, you know, take the piss out of the D listers, like, you played this guy and, you know, recap the league kind of thing. But then it was more an excuse to, like, really just lace into football in general. I mean, they will be like, merciless with, like. They would do this thing where they recreated classic moments of football and they would get like a really old guy who, you know, and like, recreate this infamous tackle or whatever. And it was. It got. Like. Even people who weren't into football like me would watch it because it's like, yeah, they're pretty merciless with it. And it. And I. When I came here, I'm like, how could surely someone did that, you know, Because I was going to C.J. solomon. I'm like, this is slam dunk. Like, this is a. [00:21:24] Speaker A: Well, yeah, that's always kind of been his brand, right. With his sports and comedy merging together. And that's kind of been her ascent. Or lately with doing that Roast for Brady. Kind of married her with sports and. And comedy. But I don't. It doesn't really work here. I feel like. Right. It's. You don't. There's. I can't think of anything anyway. [00:21:44] Speaker C: Yeah. Yeah, I guess you're right, because I. It's probably two very different mindsets. I'll bet the people in England that watch English football are probably the same sort of brand of mind that enjoy good comedy. Whereas the typical, I want to say most Americans that watch American football probably don't have that brand of comedy, that brand of mine that enjoys the same comedy. They might be more of a Larry Cable guy sort of. [00:22:12] Speaker A: Okay. The only guy that comes to mind in that arena is Bob Nelson. Do you remember Bob Nelson, the comedian? [00:22:19] Speaker B: Did he do funny. I thought he did funny songs. [00:22:23] Speaker A: He may have done some songs, but. [00:22:24] Speaker B: With his headshot at Zany's, like he's got a football helmet and boxing gloves. [00:22:29] Speaker A: I don't know about the boxing gloves, but his what, what he became known for was this bit where he put on football pads and a helmet and he'd come out on stage or he'd do it on stage where he'd impersonate all these different football players. Like I'll Billy Bob from Bridal, you know, from Alabama. And then he'd do another football character, another football character. And he'd, you know, pretend to do plays and stuff like that. [00:22:50] Speaker B: Did you see the Key and Peel Key and Peel sketch where they did the, the football names? [00:22:56] Speaker C: That's a classic. [00:22:57] Speaker B: That's. I think so, Larry. [00:22:59] Speaker A: Yes. Which one is. How's it go? [00:23:01] Speaker C: It's, it's just, you know how they do like the, like they'll have a football player announcer name, like, you know, Lamar Jackson. I don't know where. What college, the Ohio State or whatever. You know, it's, it's just a bunch and the names just keep getting more ridiculous, more ridiculous until they're simply just like donkey teeth. [00:23:16] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:23:16] Speaker B: I think one comes on and he's like, there's like the high pitched dolphin squeal like that sketch was. And then they got the packers to actually. Yeah, because a couple of the packers had ridiculous names. One of them was called Haha Dixon or something. [00:23:36] Speaker A: Yeah. Clinton Hard. [00:23:37] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. And like, so they, you know, those players were, were, you know, cool enough to be like. [00:23:43] Speaker C: Yeah, in the original, the original sketch, some of those guys were actual Packers. [00:23:48] Speaker B: No, no, no, I think they did a special. [00:23:51] Speaker C: Oh, they did one of the versions. [00:23:53] Speaker B: No, no, no. Key and Peele did it. But they integrated the actual packers said, yeah, we'll do it. That's because Aaron Rodgers was like a, a Ron Rogers. [00:24:04] Speaker A: Like he said, that's where that bit comes from. [00:24:06] Speaker B: Yeah. So like, but you know, they, they had all. But they, you know, that bit is, I mean, just how the names get is effing hilarious. I, I think, I think there is Scope. Yeah, maybe, maybe to do a comedy. The only issue is going to be the NFL is going to piss on your chips and say, you, you can't use team logos, blah, blah, blah, blah. You know, you. You got to have that. You know, I mean, I don't think they even do fanzine. Do you ever see fanzines for sale outside? [00:24:39] Speaker A: No, no, but I think we talked about that with the Blackhawks thing, right? How they used it. No, the fans control everything. [00:24:45] Speaker B: The fans of English soccer, football teams are merciless with their own teams. I mean, just I can remember like, there was a. There was a player for Liverpool, Sammy Lee, and he was kind of ch. I mean, my soccer players are skinny, right? This guy, Sammy Lee was. Was chubby for a football player. And the Liverpool fans, when he. When he got set, you know, he was off and on as a substitute, they would chant, he's fat and he's bouncing all around the ground. Sammy Lee, like their own player. But like, you know, it was just, you know, I remember someone was telling me there was used to be this guy, David Speedy, Scottish player, and everyone hated him. And the. The fans started chanting, speedy is a wanker. Speedy is a wanker. Like, over and over. And in the end, he started dancing to it, like. Yeah. [00:25:40] Speaker A: I mean, you know, embrace it. [00:25:42] Speaker B: Yeah. If you're in sports, you gotta have a laugh. [00:25:45] Speaker A: Yeah. Yeah. There's. Yeah, you should. Right. It takes. The NFL takes itself way too seriously for that. Right. And it's a very vanilla brand. So when you take somebody like Nikki Glazer and try to merge what she does with, you know, the vanilla NFL, it does not work. It does not work. [00:26:02] Speaker B: Gotta be unfettered. Which leads us into the review. [00:26:05] Speaker A: Yeah. So I'd never seen her. Her full act. I'm surprised, I guess, that she's. Well, I guess I'm not surprised that she's been cracking away for 10 plus years more. I'm sure if she'd had her Comedy Central special in 2016, that's probably 10 more years before that. [00:26:22] Speaker C: She started when she was 18. [00:26:23] Speaker A: Wow. So where does she come from? What's. [00:26:26] Speaker C: She started doing comedy when she was a freshman in college. And in an interview she said that she. [00:26:33] Speaker A: St. Louis. [00:26:35] Speaker C: Well, she lives in St. Louis. She lives now in St. Louis with her parents, so I'd assume she's from. [00:26:40] Speaker B: Currently. [00:26:41] Speaker C: Yes. She currently lives in St. Louis as 2022. Yes. Because why. It didn't say in the Wikipedia article I was reading. [00:26:49] Speaker B: She was born in Cincinnati, though. [00:26:51] Speaker C: Okay. She was born in Cincinnati. And I don't know where she went to college, but she said that instead of studying, she would judge people and think, what did Sarah Silver. What would Sarah Silverman say about these people? Because she said she didn't have her own perspective, and she only knew the comics that she knew. So she would try to use their perspective to think of her jokes and then developed her own perspective from there throughout the years. [00:27:13] Speaker A: Yeah. That's interesting, because one of the things I wrote down was Glazer versus Silverman. Like, there. There's a commonality there. Right. Not saying she's trying to be Sarah Silverman. [00:27:23] Speaker C: Sure. [00:27:23] Speaker A: She said that. It sounds like. Or she was. [00:27:25] Speaker C: Yep. [00:27:25] Speaker A: You know. [00:27:26] Speaker C: Yeah. At least. Yeah. 13 years before this special, that's what she was doing. I think she eventually developed her own. [00:27:31] Speaker A: Every comedian. Right. [00:27:32] Speaker C: We can agree on this. [00:27:33] Speaker A: Right? Every comedian that starts out is following a favorite archetype. Yeah, right. Or whoever that is. Right, right. [00:27:39] Speaker C: It's just like a musician, you know, you start playing music, you. You play just like the people that you listen to all the time, you know, you try to emulate them. [00:27:47] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah. So I. So I, you know, only knew her from the. The roast and the NFL thing. So I was. You know, I didn't love all that, you know, and so I went in, kind of like, all right, here we go. You know? And she starts off kind of, you know, benign, if you want to say benign or tame. Talking about kids and. And not being married and not wanting kids, but wanting a baby, you know? Familiar territory for a female comedian. [00:28:18] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:28:20] Speaker A: But then I don't. I didn't write down the time. But not too long into it when she starts talking about dating and being in that twin bed, right? She goes into the bit about a man will do anything right before he climaxes. And then from there, it's an avalanche. It's an avalanche of sexual comedy that does not end and never takes a. A break. Not even. Not even for a second. [00:28:46] Speaker B: I like how at one point she says to the audience, I'm obsessed with talking about sex. And I'm like, I think we've. [00:28:53] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:28:53] Speaker B: Picked up on that, me dear. [00:28:57] Speaker A: Yeah. And so then she, you know, for me, she endears herself to me, I was gonna say. Then it's like, okay, this is for you. [00:29:03] Speaker B: It's porn. [00:29:04] Speaker A: It's on a. Well, not that so much, but for me, it is. Yeah. It's like comedy porn. Right. Unabashed sexual humor, which I love. Which I love. So didn't love her at the beginning, but by the end. Yeah. [00:29:19] Speaker B: Yes. It was a weird way to start it, knowing where she was heading because I just put down, you know, she's doing stuff about age, you know, dreading, aging. And I was like, yeah, this is typical attractive female comedian territory, right? [00:29:34] Speaker A: Yes. [00:29:34] Speaker B: You know, and. And. But then she just. The thing that hooked me in was when she was talking about teenage mums and babysitting and stuff, and it got like mean spirited. And I was like, yeah, okay, now you got me. [00:29:48] Speaker C: I like that. [00:29:49] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:29:49] Speaker B: I was loving. I always. I don't know what it is about because I put just working class hatred, exclamation point. And then I'm like, okay, we're off to the races. And then it was, you know, like slow dancing with her dad. It is like, okay, we're heading. I know where we're going. [00:30:08] Speaker C: Let me ask you, did. I was wondering if. Did you guys get the. The joke of the song that she mentioned? The Genuine Pony? [00:30:15] Speaker B: Oh, yeah, yeah. [00:30:16] Speaker C: Okay. [00:30:17] Speaker A: It's a grinder. [00:30:18] Speaker B: It's a grinder. Yeah. [00:30:18] Speaker C: It's a very sexual song. [00:30:20] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:30:20] Speaker C: Yeah. I was kind of. I was surprised that so many people in theater laughed at that because, I mean, it's such an old hit, you know, that I thought, wow. I was actually very happy that Genuine's. But was it old in 2016? I think it was already. I mean, that song was out when I was in high school. I mean, that was. That's like 1998, right? [00:30:37] Speaker A: Give me a verse from it so I can. [00:30:39] Speaker C: Well, I mean, the chorus is like, oh, God, now I'm all right. [00:30:45] Speaker B: Yeah, it's more about. [00:30:48] Speaker A: How about you? He's tone deaf. I can't pick up anything from him. [00:30:50] Speaker C: It's the one that's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. [00:30:55] Speaker B: It's about the sample more than anything. [00:30:58] Speaker C: But yeah, it's about riding a pony. It's a very sexual, you know, grinding song. [00:31:04] Speaker A: Well, without even knowing the song, I could pick that much up. [00:31:06] Speaker C: Yeah, I guess that the context clues give that away. During that. Around that time, I thought something. She was talking about the maiden name thing. I thought. [00:31:13] Speaker A: I thought that was great. The security question. [00:31:15] Speaker C: I've never thought of that. And as soon as she started going, it was like, oh, my God, you're right. That is she. You know, like, she says that's your name your whole life and all of a sudden you throw it away just so that someday your shithead son can use it when he's opening a checking account. I thought, nailed it. [00:31:32] Speaker B: What was the follow up and the question Is. [00:31:35] Speaker C: Oh, your first concert. So. So it's. It' your name that you've had your whole life duking it out with Limp Bizkit, you know. [00:31:43] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah. And so she. She shows. And maybe, you know, other acts that she does showcase it more, but she shows. She couldn't. She can do other kinds of humor. She doesn't just have to do sexual humor. So as she plows through all that other sex stuff, you think, like, maybe, you know, could she go back to it at some point in a set like this? Or once the floodgates are open, you just have to stay there. [00:32:06] Speaker C: I wish she had. I wish she had, too. At one point, I had had enough of. I was just like, yeah, yeah, I get it. You know? Yeah, go back to what you're doing before. That was great. [00:32:15] Speaker A: Yeah. But I think that. I think that's hard for a comedian especially. [00:32:19] Speaker C: Sure. [00:32:20] Speaker A: Comedian, who's. I guess for her at this point, this is where she's just starting to hit. Right. Like, you got to go with where, you know you'll get laughs. Right. And being more nuanced or more, you. [00:32:32] Speaker B: Know, this is one of the few comedians where I am going to go watch some other stuff. [00:32:36] Speaker A: You are. [00:32:37] Speaker B: I, you know, I know she's a megastar. 2.2 million. I'd heard her name enough to know, yeah, this is a mega star now. [00:32:44] Speaker A: She is. Yeah. [00:32:45] Speaker B: And, you know, I'm actually gonna go and watch another one and be like, okay, is it just Shag Shack? Shag. Shag. Because she's clearly an amazing joke writer, so she could probably spin gold out of anything. [00:32:58] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:32:58] Speaker B: I'll be interested to know. I mean, obviously, when you look as physically attractive as she is, and you're smart as she is, and you're as good a joke writer, you're gonna have every dude between the age of 15 and whatever is gonna be worshiping you. What I was interested to see is how what fat percentage of a fan base is women. That, to me, is gonna be interesting. [00:33:27] Speaker A: Do you think she's liked by women if you're just gonna judge this act? [00:33:31] Speaker B: No, no. I would think she is, but I'm saying she's like your teenage fanboys dream for comedy. So I'm guessing, you know, she has a massive following amongst male comedy, like, lovers that probably might. Not that she's not unappealing to women, but it's just the sheer volume of dudes that are gonna like her is. Is probably off the charts. [00:33:58] Speaker A: Yeah. I mean, I know. [00:34:00] Speaker B: Especially younger dudes. You know, the Bros. [00:34:04] Speaker A: Yeah. Yeah. Is that. Yeah, I guess it is, right. Like we've talked about this when we talked about Silverman and other female comedians. You can't, unfortunately, at least. And I don't think man or woman, you can't. You, you, you can't separate her from her looks, right? And I was thinking about like a Matt Rife, who's the, the male version of that, right? He's a really good looking guy in comedy. Like, I don't find anyone, male or female, that's good looking generally. Like, I have to work past that to find them funny. Right. Like, but with her, it was less of a challenge for me, right? Like, she was just, she was funny. I wasn't really even thinking about her attractiveness. You know, like when a woman isn't very funny, then it's more about. Of her attractiveness or lack of when you're really funny. I kind of, I think it, you know, I don't. I know what you're saying about the, you know, comedy fanboys like, worshiping her, but her sexuality wasn't even in. Despite the fact that her whole act was about sex. Like, I was never, you know, looking at her in that way, I guess. Does that make sense? [00:35:09] Speaker B: I don't know. Yeah. I mean, whenever I look at a comedian, I do look at one of the things that I, I think I said before always frustrated me was comedians walking on stage looking like six acts of shit. And it's like, this is show business. Like I'm, I'm not espousing it as a, as a thing that I personally believe. I don't care what you look like, but you clean yourself up. You are in show business. You are in show business, like it or not, right? And you know, I wouldn't be saying to someone, hey, try not dressing like a tramp. You know what I mean? I don't mean tramp in the American sense. I mean in the English sense. I would say that not because I give a per se, but because I want you to succeed. And you are in a business that essentially demands that. So. [00:36:03] Speaker A: Yeah, but then there's. But there's for an exception every rule, right? I, I'm not generally, but have to be, but for some people, the schlubbiness, the tramp look is, is, is the show business. That is their look, right? [00:36:19] Speaker C: Sam Kinison. [00:36:20] Speaker A: Sam Kinison. I don't know who he was. No, he's love. He had like leather, long leather jacket. [00:36:25] Speaker C: And Beretta's, wearing like a long dirty jacket. [00:36:28] Speaker A: Maybe. [00:36:29] Speaker C: Yeah, maybe I'M thinking the beret looked dirty. [00:36:31] Speaker A: Yeah, but Sandler is a good example of that. He's always schlub, right? He's always schlub looking. [00:36:36] Speaker B: Not when he was younger. He doesn't have to be now. [00:36:39] Speaker A: He can't now. Right. But if you're coming up, you're saying clean yourself up, present yourself well, don't be a six bags of shit. [00:36:46] Speaker B: Well, not even that. Be cool looking. [00:36:49] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:36:51] Speaker C: Have we gotten too far past the. The female fan base question? I was doing a little. [00:36:55] Speaker A: No, you did a little research. What do we got over there? [00:36:57] Speaker C: Well, according to AI, it looks like she does have a very significant female fan base. And it kind of makes sense they're giving a little explanation here. She did all those shows with Amy Schumer and all that and I guess she hosted something called Fboy Island. So like just from that alone, like, oh, of course, you know. And so she's been in a lot of comedies and she's acted in things that fema, males female. That women like. And what was the other point here? Oh, I guess she is listed as a 26 most followed female comedian on Instagram. [00:37:31] Speaker A: 26 most feet followed female. [00:37:34] Speaker C: Right. There's 26 ahead of 25 ahead of her. 25 does sound like a lot. But how many of those are a female comedian? It doesn't say that. [00:37:41] Speaker A: Oh, most followed female, not comedian. [00:37:43] Speaker C: Right? [00:37:44] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:37:44] Speaker C: Well, no, no. [00:37:46] Speaker B: Followed female means 25 females ahead of. [00:37:50] Speaker C: Oh, yeah, you're right, 25. [00:37:52] Speaker A: I mean, Rosie O', Donnell, Barbara Bush, Jack A. Harry, Sandra Bernard, Madonna, that don't. I'm out. [00:38:10] Speaker B: She had two. I looked up 2.2 million Instagram. [00:38:13] Speaker A: Paul Abdul, 2.2 million Instagrams. Is that good. [00:38:21] Speaker B: Site? Better than this show's got. [00:38:23] Speaker A: How many we have? Are we on Instagram? [00:38:26] Speaker C: Are we back up to double digit listeners at this point? [00:38:29] Speaker A: I have 86 followers on my Instagram, but it's private, so I don't give it out to everybody. And some people want to follow and I don't let them. They've requests to follow and I don't even answer. [00:38:41] Speaker C: Was a big deal one day when our dueling pianos Instagram gained 1,000 followers. [00:38:46] Speaker A: Really? [00:38:46] Speaker C: Yeah. That was. That was worthy of celebration, huh? [00:38:50] Speaker A: When was that? Was that recently? [00:38:52] Speaker C: It was a couple years ago and I think it's about 10 more than that now. [00:38:56] Speaker A: 10? [00:38:57] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:38:57] Speaker A: Yeah. Well, he had a high water mark. [00:38:59] Speaker C: Yeah, right. Well, we really tried for it. We opened up a lot of Instagram accounts to get there. [00:39:03] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:39:04] Speaker B: Come on, let's get back to Glazer here. I got that much to say, to be honest. Just very, very, very good. [00:39:10] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah. You led me to believe walking in today that you didn't maybe like it. What are a couple bits that you really liked? Tell me some bits that you guys really liked. [00:39:22] Speaker B: I like the class hatred stuff, the teen moms thing, because. [00:39:25] Speaker A: Why do you call that class hatred? What am I missing there? Like class hatred? [00:39:30] Speaker B: Well, you're kind of ripping on the working class. [00:39:34] Speaker A: How? Remind me. I'm not disagreeing. I just. I can't remember. [00:39:38] Speaker B: She was talking about. Oh, you know, if, if, if. Something about being a single mom. It was like. Yeah. [00:39:47] Speaker A: Oh, yes. Yeah, yeah. When she goes into that, like, if. [00:39:49] Speaker B: You should have a kid 15, that way your mom can look after her. She probably had you at 15. [00:39:54] Speaker A: Right, right. And she's just taking a shot at the working class. [00:39:57] Speaker C: She had a great joke there when she said the kid's name is Mulligan. [00:40:00] Speaker A: Yeah, that was. [00:40:00] Speaker C: Yeah, that was clever. [00:40:02] Speaker A: That wasn't her storyline. Right. It was just her being a child of a single mother. [00:40:08] Speaker B: No, no. She was talking about, I should have had kids when I was 15. [00:40:11] Speaker C: And, yeah, that was a fun. [00:40:12] Speaker A: That was, you know, past my prime. I should have had them in my. [00:40:15] Speaker B: That was the bit that hooked me in. [00:40:17] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:40:18] Speaker B: And then maiden name we talked about. [00:40:22] Speaker A: How about the hyphen. Glazer. Glaser. Giving the kid. [00:40:24] Speaker C: I thought that was great. [00:40:25] Speaker A: That was great. [00:40:26] Speaker C: Yeah. And the sister associates. [00:40:28] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah. Glazer, Glazer and Associates. Yeah. [00:40:33] Speaker B: I like the. The porn thing where she's like, you own this. And then. But she hadn't looked up anything else. And she's had to keep saying it with, like, intonations on it and stuff. [00:40:45] Speaker C: I thought the story about how she, in her words, how she had date raped her boyfriend into saying I love you. I thought that was. [00:40:51] Speaker A: Those are good. [00:40:52] Speaker C: The whole thing I thought was great. [00:40:54] Speaker B: She has amazing little. Like, she has amazing turns of phrase off, obviously, that grab you, like. Yeah, that's the way to say that. [00:41:01] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:41:01] Speaker B: I liked. She had the one line like, if you own a tank top, whether you're male or female, you've sucked some dicks. Like. [00:41:10] Speaker A: Yeah, those are good. How about before all that, when she talks about being in a relationship and, you know, lying about who she is and presenting her or something else, like brushing her teeth longer, like you're doing the bottom. Right. And flossing and bleeding and everything from a. Those are good. Showering together. [00:41:30] Speaker B: Yeah, she's. Because I Don't just lie there like a dead fish. When I'm sex, I'm just. I'm like a fish on its way out. [00:41:36] Speaker A: That was my. That was the one I was working towards. That was, I think, the best joke of all. It was great. Like, I'm gonna fish maybe on my way out. That was great. And then when she referred to her boyfriend who was searching up porn types that she might like, Right. Like, relaxed? More like. What are you, the Edward Snowden of porn? [00:41:56] Speaker B: Yeah. Oh, God. [00:42:00] Speaker A: Yeah. So, I mean, and it was dirty, but it was. It wasn't like, just over the top, gross out, shock, dirty. Right. Like, some comedians are known for, like, how far can I, you know, take you? It was more like we can all kind of relate to this level of humor. Or dirty. [00:42:21] Speaker C: Sure. [00:42:21] Speaker A: Right. So, yes, I think she's. Even though it took her 10 years from this to gain, I guess, mass appeal, she has it right here. [00:42:31] Speaker B: Well, it's where you're talking about the. How the whole the roast thing can make or break people. Did I already bore everyone with the story about booking Amy Schumer? [00:42:43] Speaker A: No, I don't think so. [00:42:44] Speaker C: No. [00:42:44] Speaker B: Okay, so Amy Schumer came to the Lincoln Lodge as part of a. Some thing with JFL or something. I can't remember. [00:42:51] Speaker A: She wouldn't wear the fez. I think we talked about. Yeah, yeah. [00:42:54] Speaker B: She would only put it in front of her lady part. Anyway, so after that, obviously her agents calling me, and he's like, hey, you know, you really need to book Amy. And this has been the back of the diner, mind you. And I'm like. I'm like, well, I go, I know she's funny. I tell that in an instant. She's Blows the doors off. I said, but the problem is, if she comes to Chicago, I won't sell one ticket. You know, it doesn't matter how much I tell people how funny she is. No one knows who she is. It's a waste of time. And he nags me for about a month. And then his last call to me was like, they're gonna put out the Justin Bieber roast or whatever roast that she debuted on. And he goes, after that, it's. It's like, he's never. [00:43:44] Speaker A: So he's saying, you got to get her now. Before that. [00:43:46] Speaker B: Yeah. He literally was like, after that comes out, forget about it. Like, she's united center. And I'm like, well, you know, call me. Call me after that comes out, then. And of course, like, it's like, forget about it. [00:43:59] Speaker A: Like, what Skin off your back, wasn't she? He wanted a big payday for her to appear here. [00:44:06] Speaker B: That. I mean, they want a huge wedge of cash up front, but it's like I'm gonna have to work my knackers off just to even try and get anyone in the room. [00:44:17] Speaker A: Well, you're gonna get your normal crowd. You only have so many seats. But like it seems to me, and I'm no businessman, but having her here and eating whatever you're gonna eat to pay her, you're not gonna recoup it at the door, but you're gonna recoup it in credibility after you can say she was here. Right. Amy Schumer was there. Oh, right. Now you don't see it that way. [00:44:38] Speaker B: Doesn't mean shit. [00:44:39] Speaker A: Doesn't mean shit. I don't care who Betty Murphy performed here. Popped in on Wednesday night. You don't think there this. That would generate some kind of crazy buzz for the place. [00:44:48] Speaker B: It will generate a brief blip of the, hey, this guy turned up. Would it give us any long term thing? No, absolutely not. [00:44:56] Speaker C: Speaking of which, was it between last episode and this one that we had the pop. [00:44:59] Speaker A: Yes, it was. [00:45:00] Speaker C: We were just talking about people popping in and how they don't. [00:45:04] Speaker A: And he said, nobody pops in here. [00:45:05] Speaker C: In that very weekend. [00:45:06] Speaker A: Mr. Like that night. [00:45:08] Speaker C: Yeah, yeah, it was, it was that. [00:45:09] Speaker A: Jeff Garland popped in, did a couple on the fest. [00:45:12] Speaker C: Yeah. Wore the fez like a trooper. [00:45:14] Speaker B: But anyway, yeah, Schumer thing. She goes on this roast, I can't remember which one it was, but boom, just explode. And then it's like, forget. And that's the, that's the, the, the kick in the nuts with comedy. It's like, you know, the agent wants you to have them while they're unknown. Oh, you should, you should have them. And you're like, yeah, but I, I get that they're a really good comedian. I'm just not gonna. [00:45:41] Speaker A: She can come for free. [00:45:43] Speaker B: Well, I mean, here's the dumbest one. Aziz Ansari. I went to New York, I went to UCB or whatever it was. Saw him doing his one man show to about, you know, 20 people. So I went up to him after the show. This is when he's, you know, hey, do you ever come to Chicago? I would love to have you. And he, and he's like, he says to me, he goes, literally, because he goes, if you can get me a couch to sleep on and a flight and it's 200 bucks, I'll come to Chicago and do a show with you. And I came home, I said to Lola, that's $200, man. Like, I mean, this is before he's, you know, a megastar, obviously. I go, I saw this guy in New York. He's the next big thing. He's amazing. He goes, but he'd want to. We'd have to shell out $200 to buy him a fly. [00:46:35] Speaker A: And then he could have stayed at your house. [00:46:37] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:46:37] Speaker A: Many legends like Eddie. [00:46:41] Speaker B: And. So that's it. Like, we never had Aziz. I'm sorry. At the Lincoln Lodge for the sake of 200. But you don't think of that at some. [00:46:48] Speaker A: You're just thinking, what if that opportunity presented itself today? Same thing, same scenario, with a guy wants a 200 bucks flight out here and to stay on the couch. Could you do it? I know you can, but would you do it? [00:47:02] Speaker B: Probably not. [00:47:04] Speaker A: What the fuck? [00:47:05] Speaker B: Because we ain't got a pot to piss in. I don't know if you've noticed this. We haven't got a pot to piss in. That's what I mean. [00:47:14] Speaker A: But you got to take risks, right? Like in life, you gotta. You gotta roll the dice on some of this and eat it. Amy Schumer. Azizan. Sorry. You know, maybe that's where I come in with my. [00:47:29] Speaker C: Yeah, I was about to say some of that. [00:47:31] Speaker A: I have cubs tickets. Some of the Cubs sell a couple games, and we could get right. [00:47:36] Speaker C: Some decent accent here. [00:47:37] Speaker B: It's just. I don't know, maybe. Maybe other people do have the cajones needs to do it. But I look at it and I'm like, you know, and I told. I'm gonna look a comedian in the face and go, you're gonna perform to 10 people if you're lucky. [00:47:49] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:47:50] Speaker B: You know, that's the. The reality of it. [00:47:55] Speaker A: Well, on that note, I thought, I. [00:48:00] Speaker C: Like the way that she. She'd ended it with the. I mean, of course, I realized that it might not have already been determined the name of the special was going to be perfect. [00:48:07] Speaker A: Yeah. I'm so dumb. I didn't even realize that until the end. And I was like, perfect. I was like, oh, that's why it's called perfect. Yeah. [00:48:13] Speaker C: Yeah. And she had that great callback. However, she ended it with this great joke about, you know, the relation between her being, you know, being perfect to the anatomy parts that she was talking about being perfect and why they're being called perfect. But then she added the button at the end, which didn't work as well, before she said, good night, New York. She did the button she had a great joke, and then she just. She did one more line that fell flat and then said, goodnight, New York. And it was just like. [00:48:42] Speaker A: God. I was. You shouldn't end on a high note, right? [00:48:44] Speaker C: Really? You don't think so? [00:48:45] Speaker A: What was the last. [00:48:46] Speaker C: I. I can't remember exactly what she said at the end, but I was kind of hoping when you wrote it down, actually. [00:48:51] Speaker A: Yeah, what she says. Well, I. I wrote down. [00:48:55] Speaker B: My last words are huge penis. That's the last thing I wrote down. [00:48:59] Speaker A: Huge penis. Yeah. Well, I know it was. It was equating the perfect dick to, you know, same thing with a vagina. Right. That you're perfect. Right. Take it. [00:49:12] Speaker C: Right. [00:49:15] Speaker A: I. But the bit before that, she should have ended on that Febreze commercial bit where she talks about it, like, blindfolding somebody and. And like the guy sitting in there in the hoarder's apartment with a rat crawling around on the garbage can. Oh, God, that was funny. [00:49:33] Speaker C: How do you think that works with. I know that a lot of specials like this. Now, this was taped. This was filmed at a college in New York. I don't remember what the name of. [00:49:42] Speaker A: The college it was. It looks like it's like a big theater. [00:49:45] Speaker C: Yeah, yeah, it was. It was a college. John something college or something like that. [00:49:50] Speaker A: So you picked this special, right? Why? Just. This was her big one, her first one. [00:49:54] Speaker C: This was. Yeah, this was a Mark Gary recommendation. [00:49:57] Speaker A: You're not supposed to be picking. [00:49:59] Speaker B: No, what it was. Was we were gonna try and play two last week, right. And I said to Christian, I haven't got the time to do, like, two long things. I think Eddie Izzard was racing. [00:50:12] Speaker A: Right. [00:50:12] Speaker B: We got the three hours. [00:50:14] Speaker C: Yeah, that was too much. [00:50:15] Speaker B: So I said, well, we've been punting the name Nikki Glazer around for weeks now, and I see 1 that's 40 minutes. We can. We can. [00:50:23] Speaker A: I like that. As soon as I saw that, even before I started, like, this is gonna be nice. [00:50:27] Speaker C: I wrote. I even wrote that down. I was like, it was nice and f. Great pace. It was over like that. I thought that was. [00:50:33] Speaker A: Did you watch it on YouTube? [00:50:34] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:50:35] Speaker A: You notice, like, the. Like, it kept fading in and out, Right. Not to commercial. [00:50:42] Speaker C: Because it was a Comedy Central special. [00:50:44] Speaker A: Oh, so it had. So they were just editing out the commercials. [00:50:46] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:50:46] Speaker A: But did you also notice the. The guy that was right near the camera or whatever, laughing, like, it was almost like. Sounded like home video. Like dad was filming. Like, you know, like, we used to record our comedy sets, and you could hear idiot Right next to the thing. [00:51:02] Speaker B: No, I normally pick that up. I normally notice that minutiae. Oh, no. A lot of the time I was working on. I was on my computer, so I had an Excel spreadsheet open and I was. I would flip back. I know, I know. Because I have to flip back when I know she's done some act out, then I have to go back. [00:51:22] Speaker A: Oh, yeah, yeah. No, that's not good. You got to be in the moment. Right. Put your aside. Be in the moment for 40 minutes. Right. [00:51:30] Speaker B: I guess. [00:51:31] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:51:32] Speaker B: I struggle to do that. [00:51:34] Speaker A: All right, I think we're. [00:51:35] Speaker C: We're ready to vote. [00:51:38] Speaker A: We're ready to vote. And I think we're universal here. [00:51:40] Speaker B: Yeah, Yeah. [00:51:41] Speaker C: I think it's. It's no brainer. [00:51:43] Speaker A: Unanimous is what I meant to say. This is special. It's a special. Very special, special performer. She's. I. It was Val. Not validating for me, but only having seen bits and pieces of erect her current stuff, this validates for me that she's legit deserved comedian of all her accolades and attention and recent fame. So I expected otherwise, I guess. Right. But she was great. She's awesome. [00:52:13] Speaker B: Yeah. I didn't know what to expect. [00:52:16] Speaker C: Yeah. I also didn't know what to expect. And speaking of not knowing what to expect, our next special is something that I know nothing about, but I have heard a lot from the fans of this performer. It's going to be a little different. The performer is a puppet. [00:52:33] Speaker A: What? [00:52:33] Speaker C: Yes. [00:52:34] Speaker A: Willie Tyler and Lester. Jeff Dunham. [00:52:38] Speaker C: Oh, God, no. It is called Randy Writes a Novel and it's from 2018. [00:52:45] Speaker A: Randy writes a Novel. It's a puppet alone? [00:52:48] Speaker C: I believe so. I'm going into it almost as blind as you are. I've seen pictures of the performer. I've even seen pictures of the puppeteer behind the podium from the fans that I know. [00:53:01] Speaker A: Wow. [00:53:03] Speaker C: And. And I guess this person has a lot of material out there. This particular special comes highly recommended by some of the fans that I have asked and it is on YouTube. [00:53:16] Speaker A: Say it again. Randy Goes to the Movies. [00:53:18] Speaker C: Randy Writes a novel. [00:53:20] Speaker A: Randy Writes a Novel. [00:53:21] Speaker B: I thought it was going to be a. [00:53:23] Speaker A: You know, that's the name of the comedian, though. [00:53:25] Speaker C: Randy is the name of the comedian. But the name of the special is. Well, I think so. [00:53:28] Speaker A: Like, Mike Olsen had a Randy. [00:53:30] Speaker B: Yeah, I was thinking it was. You were gonna say. What's it, the dog guy? [00:53:36] Speaker A: Triumph. [00:53:36] Speaker C: Oh, traffic dog. They don't have a whole special of that kind of. [00:53:40] Speaker A: Yeah, I think they do. [00:53:41] Speaker B: Anyway, talking of triumphs, let's end with the. Well, as you know, the love train. [00:53:50] Speaker A: The shag train is what I was calling it to many people and. Well, started out well, I was very excited for a three day shag a thon and it turned out not to be. Well, worry not. I did shag, but we had a. We had a roomette. [00:54:11] Speaker C: Is it difficult? That's what I was gonna ask. So it was. Which way do you sleep? Which way is the bed compared to the tracks? Is it perpendicular? [00:54:18] Speaker A: It is, yeah. It's parallel. The track. What? No, parallel, yes. Okay, parallel. Both beds parallel to the tracks. It's like bunks, like barracks. And it's very tight in there. And the top, your nose is six inches from the top. If you're on the top bunk, below is where the two seats are during the day that fold together into one. You get a little more room in there, but only about 24 inches wide. So your only position is to be on top. Missionary. And it's very hard mattress. Not. [00:54:58] Speaker C: What sort of doors are on the. [00:55:01] Speaker A: Well, there's a curtain and there's a sliding door, but there's quite a. Quite a space at the bottom of the door. Right. For all a manner of sound. [00:55:12] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. [00:55:13] Speaker A: Like the American bathroom. Yep. Not that much, but a good amount. So it is very tight quarters in the roomette and the roomettes near you are there. Right there. [00:55:23] Speaker C: So did you hear anybody else getting down? [00:55:25] Speaker A: No, I did not. I did not. It's. Well, what you need to know about Amtrak is, is if you're riding it, you're over 70, basically. I don't know why, but there's not a lot of young folk on these strips. But we did make love and it was interesting. It was not. The normal lovemaking was very quiet and I was a gentle lover and we both, we both enjoyed it. [00:55:51] Speaker B: Did it turn into like a farce like you see on movies where people are on track? You know, like the bunk accidentally closed when you were halfway through the act and. [00:56:02] Speaker A: No, but this is funny. [00:56:04] Speaker B: This is funny. Flew out of the window and you like hanging on to the edge of. Of the train with your deck trailing. [00:56:10] Speaker A: None of that, none of that happened. None of that kind of stuff. But we kind of talked about this last time we did pull into and we made love in the evening. We had the, the little lights on in the room at. There are these like tiny like airplane lights that are above you. Right. But they lit up the whole area. Because I'm a visual wealth maker, I need, I need lights to be on but as we rolled into some station in North Dakota, right. There's a bunch of people on the platform and we rolled right. And the curtains were wide open. We rolled right up, right up to the station where they're waiting to get on with their bags and the windows are wide open and my white ass is just totally up. I'm not making this up. I was like, oh, God. Oh. And I pulled the curtain shut. [00:56:55] Speaker C: Life imitates art. [00:56:56] Speaker A: Yes. So talked about that with the farmers. But this was at the station. We pulled into a station. [00:57:02] Speaker C: So you said, farmers, I can do you one better. [00:57:04] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:57:06] Speaker C: Crew of people that I'm about to see in the dining. [00:57:09] Speaker B: I don't know. [00:57:10] Speaker A: I swear to God. [00:57:11] Speaker C: Did anybody recognize you in the dining car after? [00:57:16] Speaker A: So I was hoping for a three bagger on this trip and I only got the one bagger. But once we got to Seattle, we had a night in Seattle. And well, I'll tell you, we sit in. All that pent up energy was released at the Salish Lodge and Spa and. [00:57:34] Speaker B: The Space Needle made an appearance. [00:57:39] Speaker A: Yeah, she got to see the Space Needle. Of course. For sure, for sure. So it was great. It was great. [00:57:46] Speaker B: Disappointed that no shenanigans occurred on the train other than the like, maybe someone bust in on your thing and you threw them out of the window like in, in James Bond did. [00:57:58] Speaker A: No, no, nothing like that. Pretty tame otherwise. But yeah, the most. The craziest thing is we ate all our meals in this nice dining car. Right. Because you. If you're. If you have a room, you get like upscale dining, but they make you sit in a small booth next to your. Whoever you're with, but across from two strangers who you've never met. [00:58:19] Speaker C: Really? [00:58:20] Speaker A: Yeah. You have no choice but to sit there and go out to dinner basically with strangers that you've never met. [00:58:27] Speaker C: So did they include a meal for each of you for one room at. [00:58:31] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:58:31] Speaker C: Each meal? Yeah, it's all two meals. [00:58:33] Speaker A: Yep. Yep. Because you're going. [00:58:35] Speaker C: I'm going. Yeah. I have my own room at. [00:58:38] Speaker A: So you'll get one meal. But. [00:58:39] Speaker C: Yeah, right. I'm getting ripped off. But that means I probably. No, but we pay. [00:58:44] Speaker A: You don't pay the same amount for one roomette. If there's two people on it, you pay more. [00:58:48] Speaker C: Oh, you do? [00:58:48] Speaker A: Oh, yeah. [00:58:49] Speaker C: Oh, I see. Oh, okay, that makes sense. Of course. Why wouldn't you? Yeah, but hopefully then that means I'm not sitting across from a stranger at dinner. Nothing I hate more. Yes. [00:58:59] Speaker A: Will you be traveling on this train alone? You don't have any fellow travelers. [00:59:03] Speaker C: My girlfriend has the room across the. [00:59:05] Speaker A: Hall, so you'll eat with her. [00:59:06] Speaker C: That's what I mean. So hopefully we each get our. Because if. [00:59:08] Speaker A: Oh, no, you'll be eating with two strangers. [00:59:11] Speaker C: With the strangers. Even though we each have our own roomette. [00:59:13] Speaker A: Huh? No. [00:59:14] Speaker C: Yeah, you'll. [00:59:14] Speaker A: It's four at a table. [00:59:16] Speaker B: I bet your dynamics like mine, though. If I took my Mrs. She would, by the end of the journey, know the life story of Samarth. I would have just said, nice weather, isn't it? And carried on eating peas. [00:59:30] Speaker A: I mean, it would be too awkward to sit there in silence. You have to have no choice but to make conversation. And you know what? I dreaded it Going in like, oh, this is gonna be so bad. Like. But by the end, I was loving it. Like, I'm getting all these people's life stories, right? And I don't know what that was like, one of the highlights of the trip for me. [00:59:47] Speaker C: It's like being on a cruise. You ever been on a cruise? [00:59:49] Speaker A: No, but. [00:59:49] Speaker C: Yeah, I did one forever ago, and that's how it went. By the end of it, you knew everybody that was on your floor, like. [00:59:55] Speaker A: At the pool, you know, and I leaned into that. This is what you need for your return to humanity. Project 2025. You need to do something like this. It forces you to face humanity. [01:00:08] Speaker C: I'm excited. I'm looking forward to. Oh, it's great. [01:00:11] Speaker A: It was so great. It was so great. I love it. Yeah. All right, well, tune in to the after show and I'll give more details of the. [01:00:20] Speaker B: Behind the paywall. [01:00:21] Speaker A: Yeah, behind the paywall. Give you all the details of what. [01:00:23] Speaker C: Happened when we got Patreon. [01:00:24] Speaker A: Yeah, the Patreon subscribers. All right, we'll see you next week for Randy Goes to the Theater. [01:00:32] Speaker C: Randy goes two weeks. [01:00:33] Speaker A: Oh, you're gone, right? [01:00:34] Speaker C: Yeah, that's right. Yeah, I'll be gone next week. I will be seeing LCD sound system them in LA by then. [01:00:39] Speaker A: Wait, no, I thought you're going to North Carolina. [01:00:41] Speaker C: I'm going to North Carolina. And then at the last minute, I decided to change my flight, that it was coming back to Chicago to go to see LCD sound system at the Hollywood Bowl. [01:00:49] Speaker A: You're. You're flying cross country. [01:00:51] Speaker B: Whoa. [01:00:52] Speaker A: Y. From North Carolina to LA and then back to Chicago. [01:00:55] Speaker C: Yep. [01:00:56] Speaker B: Seven hours. [01:00:56] Speaker A: Wow. [01:00:57] Speaker C: It's going to be a. It's going to be a long one. [01:00:58] Speaker B: Six hours? [01:00:59] Speaker C: Seven hours, Something like that. I don't. I think I have a layover, too. [01:01:03] Speaker A: How long are you staying. [01:01:04] Speaker C: Phoenix? Yeah, Phoenix. I'm only there for. I'll get there the day of the show, around 4 o', clock. I will go to the show. No, I think I'll be there for the rest of that day. The next day is the show, and then the next morning I'm flying back. [01:01:17] Speaker A: Awesome. Big fan, I guess. Yeah, awesome. All right, friends, we'll see you in a couple weeks.